# Make up a Punch line to this joke: A pillbug walks into a bar **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [February 20, 2006, 10:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/make-up-a-punch-line-to-this-joke-a-pillbug-walks-into-a-bar/345391 "2006-02-20T22:56:32Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Analogue\_Skywalker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/dec6dc/32.png) [@Analogue\_Skywalker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Analogue_Skywalker)\ **Post date:** [February 20, 2006, 10:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/make-up-a-punch-line-to-this-joke-a-pillbug-walks-into-a-bar/345391/1 "2006-02-20T22:56:32Z")
a roly poly walks into a bar, sits down and orders a drink. shortly there after the rolypoly falls off his barstool onto the bar and starts rolling around knocking over everyones drinks. so this guy finally gets up the nerve to say something to the bar tender and the bartender says… fill in the punchline. I trust only comedy gold will come through this thread… if this needs to be moved to MPSIMS or IMHO do it. ---
**Author:** ![Captain\_Amazing](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/6de8d8/32.png) [@Captain\_Amazing](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Captain_Amazing)\ **Post date:** [February 20, 2006, 11:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/make-up-a-punch-line-to-this-joke-a-pillbug-walks-into-a-bar/345391/2 "2006-02-20T23:15:33Z")
So the guy says to the bartender, “Can’t you get that insect out of here?!”, and the bartender looks at him and says, “Hey, mister, are you ignorant or something? That’s a crustacean.” Ok, so I got nothing. ---
**Author:** ![Revtim](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/revtim/32/1042_2.png) [@Revtim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Revtim)\ **Post date:** [February 20, 2006, 11:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/make-up-a-punch-line-to-this-joke-a-pillbug-walks-into-a-bar/345391/3 "2006-02-20T23:49:36Z")
“The Aristocrats!” ---
**Author:** ![Nic2004](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/4491bb/32.png) [@Nic2004](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nic2004)\ **Post date:** [February 20, 2006, 11:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/make-up-a-punch-line-to-this-joke-a-pillbug-walks-into-a-bar/345391/4 "2006-02-20T23:55:50Z")
"and says to the Dung Beetle ‘May I push up your stool?’. ---
**Author:** ![NAF1138](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/naf1138/32/3245_2.png) [@NAF1138](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NAF1138)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2006, 12:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/make-up-a-punch-line-to-this-joke-a-pillbug-walks-into-a-bar/345391/5 "2006-02-21T00:35:41Z")
> [@Captain Amazing](#): > > So the guy says to the bartender, “Can’t you get that insect out of here?!”, and the bartender looks at him and says, > > “Hey, mister, are you ignorant or something? That’s a crustacean.” > > Ok, so I got nothing. I don’t know about anyone else, but I think this might win the prize for comedy gold as far as punch lines go. I loves me a good shaggy dog story. ---
**Author:** ![Cabbage](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f07891/32.png) [@Cabbage](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cabbage)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2006, 1:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/make-up-a-punch-line-to-this-joke-a-pillbug-walks-into-a-bar/345391/6 "2006-02-21T01:12:03Z")
(Kind of stupid, but all I got…): Man: I thought you didn’t serve pill(bug)s in here! Bartender: He’s all right, he’s over the counter! ---
**Author:** ![Analogue\_Skywalker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/dec6dc/32.png) [@Analogue\_Skywalker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Analogue_Skywalker)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2006, 1:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/make-up-a-punch-line-to-this-joke-a-pillbug-walks-into-a-bar/345391/7 "2006-02-21T01:34:04Z")
> [@Cabbage](#): > > (Kind of stupid, but all I got…): > > Man: I thought you didn’t serve pill(bug)s in here! > > Bartender: He’s all right, he’s over the counter! oh ZANG!!! that is the comedy gold i am looking for! ---
**Author:** ![Feydeau](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/df788c/32.png) [@Feydeau](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Feydeau)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2006, 2:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/make-up-a-punch-line-to-this-joke-a-pillbug-walks-into-a-bar/345391/8 "2006-02-21T02:00:21Z")
ZANG? :dubious: ---
**Author:** ![Larry\_Mudd](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/f14d63/32.png) [@Larry\_Mudd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Larry_Mudd)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2006, 2:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/make-up-a-punch-line-to-this-joke-a-pillbug-walks-into-a-bar/345391/9 "2006-02-21T02:15:31Z")
> [@Feydeau](#): > > ZANG? Lao Zang. 6th century comic genius and author of _The Art of Pun_. ---
**Author:** ![Analogue\_Skywalker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/dec6dc/32.png) [@Analogue\_Skywalker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Analogue_Skywalker)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2006, 2:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/make-up-a-punch-line-to-this-joke-a-pillbug-walks-into-a-bar/345391/10 "2006-02-21T02:20:20Z")
> [@Analogue Skywalker](#): > > a roly poly walks into a bar, sits down and orders a drink. > shortly there after the rolypoly falls off his barstool onto the bar and starts rolling around knocking over everyones drinks. so this guy finally gets up the nerve to say something to the bar tender and the bartender says… > fill in the punchline. I trust only comedy gold will come through this thread… > > if this needs to be moved to MPSIMS or IMHO do it. since I forgot. the bartender says “I know that its a louse-y thing to do, but he’s a good guy when hes sober” ---
**Author:** ![Analogue\_Skywalker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/dec6dc/32.png) [@Analogue\_Skywalker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Analogue_Skywalker)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2006, 2:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/make-up-a-punch-line-to-this-joke-a-pillbug-walks-into-a-bar/345391/11 "2006-02-21T02:21:50Z")
> [@Larry Mudd](#): > > Lao Zang. 6th century comic genius and author of _The Art of Pun_. YOU ARE CORRECT SIR! HEY YOOOOOO ---
**Author:** ![Trillionaire](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/aeb1de/32.png) [@Trillionaire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Trillionaire)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2006, 3:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/make-up-a-punch-line-to-this-joke-a-pillbug-walks-into-a-bar/345391/12 "2006-02-21T03:31:12Z")
> [@Analogue Skywalker](#): > > a roly poly walks into a bar, sits down and orders a drink. > shortly there after the rolypoly falls off his barstool onto the bar and starts rolling around knocking over everyones drinks. so this guy finally gets up the nerve to say something to the bar tender and the bartender says… “take my wife…please” ---
**Author:** ![Hometownboy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/5e9695/32.png) [@Hometownboy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hometownboy)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2006, 4:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/make-up-a-punch-line-to-this-joke-a-pillbug-walks-into-a-bar/345391/13 "2006-02-21T04:56:00Z")
“Don’t stop him; he’s on a roll!” ---
**Author:** ![Giant\_Spongess](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/94ad74/32.png) [@Giant\_Spongess](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Giant_Spongess)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2006, 5:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/make-up-a-punch-line-to-this-joke-a-pillbug-walks-into-a-bar/345391/14 "2006-02-21T05:07:17Z")
The bartender says, “I can’t, he might flea without paying!” ---
**Author:** ![Tarrsk](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/97f17d/32.png) [@Tarrsk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tarrsk)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2006, 5:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/make-up-a-punch-line-to-this-joke-a-pillbug-walks-into-a-bar/345391/15 "2006-02-21T05:29:03Z")
> [@](#): > > a roly poly walks into a bar, sits down and orders a drink. > shortly there after the rolypoly falls off his barstool onto the bar and starts rolling around knocking over everyones drinks. so this guy finally gets up the nerve to say something to the bar tender and the bartender says… “Don’t mind him, his sow left him for a silverfish.” ---
**Author:** ![Nic2004](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/4491bb/32.png) [@Nic2004](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nic2004)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2006, 2:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/make-up-a-punch-line-to-this-joke-a-pillbug-walks-into-a-bar/345391/16 "2006-02-21T14:11:17Z")
…and the roach in the corner says “Let’s take him out back and roll him” ---
**Author:** ![don\_t\_ask](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e68b1a/32.png) [@don\_t\_ask](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/don_t_ask)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2006, 2:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/make-up-a-punch-line-to-this-joke-a-pillbug-walks-into-a-bar/345391/17 "2006-02-21T14:31:34Z")
So the barman sprays him with insecticide and says, “Let’s see you stiff me for another drink fuckwit.” ---
**Author:** ![cmyk](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cmyk/32/3353_2.png) [@cmyk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cmyk)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2006, 3:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/make-up-a-punch-line-to-this-joke-a-pillbug-walks-into-a-bar/345391/18 "2006-02-21T15:23:08Z")
…and the bartender says, “look you ungrateful jerk, didn’t you hear him when he said ‘a round of drinks, on me!’” Ok, oww. I think i just hurt something in my head. ---
**Author:** ![Ethilrist](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ethilrist/32/4604_2.png) [@Ethilrist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ethilrist)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2006, 3:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/make-up-a-punch-line-to-this-joke-a-pillbug-walks-into-a-bar/345391/19 "2006-02-21T15:37:19Z")
“You can’t take a little pillbug rolling around? You better get outta here before sundown, when the nightcrawlers show up, then…” ---
**Author:** ![Thirty-Nine](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/f0a364/32.png) [@Thirty-Nine](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Thirty-Nine)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2006, 4:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/make-up-a-punch-line-to-this-joke-a-pillbug-walks-into-a-bar/345391/20 "2006-02-21T16:11:28Z")
“Well, if I kicked him out, I’d have to kick you out too. You’ve both knocked back too many drinks, neither of you are walking and I bet your head is spinning faster than his.” or “Sssh… I think the CIA might have bugged this bar.” [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/make-up-a-punch-line-to-this-joke-a-pillbug-walks-into-a-bar/345391.md?page=2)