# Make Your Dead Osama Bin Laden jokes right here ladies and gentleman, get 'em while they're hot! **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [May 2, 2011, 5:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/make-your-dead-osama-bin-laden-jokes-right-here-ladies-and-gentleman-get-em-while-theyre-hot/580455 "2011-05-02T05:58:26Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2011, 8:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/make-your-dead-osama-bin-laden-jokes-right-here-ladies-and-gentleman-get-em-while-theyre-hot/580455/41 "2011-05-02T20:34:29Z")
Knock knock. Who’s there? Wereseals. Wereseals who? We’re SEALS, and you’re dead. ---
**Author:** ![Oakminster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/77aa72/32.png) [@Oakminster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Oakminster)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2011, 8:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/make-your-dead-osama-bin-laden-jokes-right-here-ladies-and-gentleman-get-em-while-theyre-hot/580455/42 "2011-05-02T20:35:58Z")
> [@Sampiro](#): > > Hopefully the mods will relax the rules about hoping for or rejoicing in anybody’s death just this once. There are no such rules so far as I know. I learned of Osama’s death while playing WoW. Paraphrasing from the trade chat… \*Player01: Osama bin Laden is dead! Player02: He wuz ganked. LOL. Player03: Guess he shouldn’t have flagged himself for PVP…\* ---
**Author:** ![Infovore](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/infovore/32/420_2.png) [@Infovore](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Infovore)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2011, 9:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/make-your-dead-osama-bin-laden-jokes-right-here-ladies-and-gentleman-get-em-while-theyre-hot/580455/43 "2011-05-02T21:28:02Z")
> [@Oakminster](#): > > There are no such rules so far as I know. > > I learned of Osama’s death while playing WoW. Paraphrasing from the trade chat… > > \*Player01: Osama bin Laden is dead! > > Player02: He wuz ganked. LOL. > > Player03: Guess he shouldn’t have flagged himself for PVP…\* haha! You too, huh? I heard it in guild chat. Sorry, no jokes offhand, but I had to say: I’m not a big Obama fan, but that last picture from \*\*Hal Briston \*\*made me grin. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![shatty](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/2acd7d/32.png) [@shatty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/shatty)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2011, 9:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/make-your-dead-osama-bin-laden-jokes-right-here-ladies-and-gentleman-get-em-while-theyre-hot/580455/44 "2011-05-02T21:29:20Z")
i heard US soldiers busted debinhams first… somebody told them ‘Bed Linin’ was on the 3rd floor ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2011, 9:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/make-your-dead-osama-bin-laden-jokes-right-here-ladies-and-gentleman-get-em-while-theyre-hot/580455/45 "2011-05-02T21:40:40Z")
What was the last thing to go through bin Laden’s mind? A 5.56 NATO round. What was bin Laden’s biggest regret? That the 22nd Amendment was never repealed. ---
**Author:** ![BeyondTransience](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/c2a13f/32.png) [@BeyondTransience](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BeyondTransience)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2011, 10:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/make-your-dead-osama-bin-laden-jokes-right-here-ladies-and-gentleman-get-em-while-theyre-hot/580455/46 "2011-05-02T22:11:21Z")
> [@Sampiro](#): > > The U.S. agreed to treat his body in proper and strict observance of Islamic fundamentalist teachings on bodies, meaning his clitoris was removed before being thrown to the fishes. (It wasn’t easy to find it either.) I registered just to say this: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA 😃 Thank you. ---
**Author:** ![Arkcon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/96bed5/32.png) [@Arkcon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Arkcon)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2011, 11:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/make-your-dead-osama-bin-laden-jokes-right-here-ladies-and-gentleman-get-em-while-theyre-hot/580455/47 "2011-05-02T23:05:38Z")
OK, here’s another link, it’s from [Fark.com](http://Fark.com) because the actual Youtube video wants a login to prove age over 18, so keep it away from the kids, but it is just an awesome use of that Taiwanese CGI news visualizer: [![]( " - YouTube") ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UiDyrkU0WAQ) The US _ **did** _ say the body was washed, after all. ---
**Author:** ![alfabex](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/3bc359/32.png) [@alfabex](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/alfabex)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2011, 11:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/make-your-dead-osama-bin-laden-jokes-right-here-ladies-and-gentleman-get-em-while-theyre-hot/580455/48 "2011-05-02T23:21:38Z")
> [@shatty](#): > > Nobody ever takes a Bin out on a Bank Holiday. Can you explain this one to me? I had an English friend make a similar joke on facebook, but, not being English, I have no idea what it means. ---
**Author:** ![ENugent](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/4af34b/32.png) [@ENugent](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ENugent)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2011, 11:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/make-your-dead-osama-bin-laden-jokes-right-here-ladies-and-gentleman-get-em-while-theyre-hot/580455/49 "2011-05-02T23:28:17Z")
Bin = trashcan Bank Holiday = no trash pickup ---
**Author:** ![Chronos](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chronos/32/134_2.png) [@Chronos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chronos)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2011, 11:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/make-your-dead-osama-bin-laden-jokes-right-here-ladies-and-gentleman-get-em-while-theyre-hot/580455/50 "2011-05-02T23:31:47Z")
“Bank holiday” in the UK means basically the same thing as “National holiday” in the US: It might or might not be a day of celebration, but most folks will have off work. I’m guessing here that “bin” is “dustbin”, or trashcan. I.e., trash collection is delayed on holidays, because the garbage collectors have the day off, so nobody bothers to take out the trash on those days. ---
**Author:** ![Malleus\_Incus\_Stapes](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/malleus_incus_stapes/32/3293_2.png) [@Malleus\_Incus\_Stapes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malleus_Incus_Stapes)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2011, 11:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/make-your-dead-osama-bin-laden-jokes-right-here-ladies-and-gentleman-get-em-while-theyre-hot/580455/51 "2011-05-02T23:38:40Z")
> [@Sampiro](#): > > Hopefully the mods will relax the rules about hoping for or rejoicing in anybody’s death just this once. Not like it’s Carrot Top or Joyce Dewitt we come not to praise here, after all. > > # Share any Osama bin Laden’s Dead jokes you can think of- your own or others (though to be neighborly you should specify if it’s not your own). > > 1. Here’s hoping his 72 virgins have the clap and look like Della Reese, Betty White, and or Minnie Pearl. > > 2. Or- that they’re butch lesbians waiting for him with chains. "The good news in, even in Hell we have seventy-two virgins waiting for you! Because that’s just the sort of customer service we provide. Whadaya mean, you only wanted _female_ virgins?" (He should have specified). ---
**Author:** ![Tom\_Scud](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/f08c70/32.png) [@Tom\_Scud](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tom_Scud)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2011, 1:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/make-your-dead-osama-bin-laden-jokes-right-here-ladies-and-gentleman-get-em-while-theyre-hot/580455/52 "2011-05-03T01:44:36Z")
I want someone to sync up some classic bin Laden videos with “Still Alive” (by Jonathan Coulton; the end song from Portal). ---
**Author:** ![Sampiro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/2acd7d/32.png) [@Sampiro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sampiro)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2011, 1:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/make-your-dead-osama-bin-laden-jokes-right-here-ladies-and-gentleman-get-em-while-theyre-hot/580455/53 "2011-05-03T01:47:01Z")
Trump’s statement: “I’m feeling especially proud of myself today, I’ve accomplished something extremely important. Had Obama not used me as a decoy the word would have gotten to bin Laden that he was coming for him, but instead Obama was so fixated on watching the roast of me and so scared that I would become president and find him that he let his guard down and BLAM! Now he’s dead. You’re welcome.” ---
**Author:** ![Rick](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/9f8e36/32.png) [@Rick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rick)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2011, 2:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/make-your-dead-osama-bin-laden-jokes-right-here-ladies-and-gentleman-get-em-while-theyre-hot/580455/54 "2011-05-03T02:15:44Z")
OBL got some good news, some better news, some bad news and some very bad news when he got to hell **Good news** he got his 72 virgins **Better news** all of them are very horny **Bad news** all of them weigh over 300lbs. **Very bad news** they are all names Bubba. ---
**Author:** ![Sampiro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/2acd7d/32.png) [@Sampiro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sampiro)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2011, 2:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/make-your-dead-osama-bin-laden-jokes-right-here-ladies-and-gentleman-get-em-while-theyre-hot/580455/55 "2011-05-03T02:46:15Z")
Good News: Osama is dead and his body thrown into the sea Better News: Obama has ordered Westboro Baptist to go picket the funeral ---
**Author:** ![Rick](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/9f8e36/32.png) [@Rick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rick)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2011, 2:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/make-your-dead-osama-bin-laden-jokes-right-here-ladies-and-gentleman-get-em-while-theyre-hot/580455/56 "2011-05-03T02:53:44Z")
> [@Sampiro](#): > > Good News: Osama is dead and his body thrown into the sea > > Better News: Obama has ordered Westboro Baptist to go picket the funeral Outstanding! ---
**Author:** ![pamukman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/58f4c7/32.png) [@pamukman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pamukman)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2011, 3:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/make-your-dead-osama-bin-laden-jokes-right-here-ladies-and-gentleman-get-em-while-theyre-hot/580455/57 "2011-05-03T03:05:03Z")
Crowd Celebrating in front of white house: " Obama! Obama! Obama!" Tourist: " Aint that the guy were looking for?" Crowd Celebrating in front of white house: " Obama! Obama! Obama!" Tourist: " Oh they shot him?" Tourist : “Osama!, Osama!, Osama!” Crowd Celebrating in front of white house: (Silence,heads turn to tourist) Tourist: Oh say ma name say ma name…when no one is around you…say baby i love you…!!! ---
**Author:** ![Marley23](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Marley23](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marley23)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2011, 3:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/make-your-dead-osama-bin-laden-jokes-right-here-ladies-and-gentleman-get-em-while-theyre-hot/580455/58 "2011-05-03T03:29:01Z")
The Daily Show’s headlines on bin Laden were “Bye Bye Beardie” and “Death to Douchey.” Jon Stewart was more vindictive than I expected. I thought the best quote was something like “It’s possible they will try to attack us. You know who won’t see it? Bin Laden, because we shot his eyes out and he now lives in a pineapple under the sea.” ---
**Author:** ![Sampiro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/2acd7d/32.png) [@Sampiro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sampiro)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2011, 4:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/make-your-dead-osama-bin-laden-jokes-right-here-ladies-and-gentleman-get-em-while-theyre-hot/580455/59 "2011-05-03T04:40:53Z")
[Early cut of Daily Show](http://gawker.com/#!5797950/jon-stewart-celebrates-the-death-of-osama-bin-laden) ---
**Author:** ![Taber](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ac91a4/32.png) [@Taber](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Taber)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2011, 6:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/make-your-dead-osama-bin-laden-jokes-right-here-ladies-and-gentleman-get-em-while-theyre-hot/580455/60 "2011-05-03T06:27:03Z")
[http://dailypicksandflicks.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/05/obama-mission-accomplished.jpg](http://dailypicksandflicks.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/05/obama-mission-accomplished.jpg) [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/make-your-dead-osama-bin-laden-jokes-right-here-ladies-and-gentleman-get-em-while-theyre-hot/580455.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/make-your-dead-osama-bin-laden-jokes-right-here-ladies-and-gentleman-get-em-while-theyre-hot/580455.md?page=4)