# Male anatomy question **URL:** \ **Category:** Factual Questions\ **Created:** [September 3, 2000, 1:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/male-anatomy-question/31864 "2000-09-03T13:34:26Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Cisco](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ccd318/32.png) [@Cisco](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cisco)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2000, 1:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/male-anatomy-question/31864/1 "2000-09-03T13:34:26Z")
_OK, im going to go ahead and say it up front. This thread is about testicles, if you dont want to read about testicles then stop now._ For anyone mature (or immature) enough to have read this far…i have a question. Have you ever looked intently at your testicles for any amount of time? They move! And not just a pulse or a breathing-induced movement. They seem to have a definate, ‘tidal-like’ movement, slow as it may be. Or at least mine do. Am i totally fucked up or has anyone else noticed this? What is it? ---
**Author:** ![lucie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/ed8c4c/32.png) [@lucie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lucie)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2000, 2:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/male-anatomy-question/31864/2 "2000-09-03T14:06:01Z")
Nope, that’s normal. Watched it plenty of times myself. It’s really weird the first time you see it, sort of like there are these alien creatures slowly shifing position. WAG - something to do with temperature regulation? ---
**Author:** ![kanicbird](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/5f8ce5/32.png) [@kanicbird](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kanicbird)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2000, 4:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/male-anatomy-question/31864/3 "2000-09-03T16:06:50Z")
here’s a test drive along an interstate, at least 16 mph faster then the speed limit and faster then anyone else. once you pass a speedtrap, you should feel your balls getting sucked into you body. in short they do move ---
**Author:** ![Bassguy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/51bf81/32.png) [@Bassguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bassguy)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2000, 4:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/male-anatomy-question/31864/4 "2000-09-03T16:27:02Z")
Temperature regulation it is (assuming you’re not screaming past a speedtrap–see above) Testes, ummmmm, “work” best at slightly below body temperature. So if you’re really hot, ( no snide comments) they descend to cool off and if you’re really cold, they snuggle up to stay warm. This phenomenon has led to the horrible experience of “shrinkage” after swimming in cold water and the myth that a session in a hot tub is an effective birth control method. (They get too hot and it kills the sperm. Right.) It is an interesting way to start or finish a conversation: “Honey, wanna watch my balls move?” ---
**Author:** ![Aglarond](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/c77e96/32.png) [@Aglarond](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Aglarond)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2000, 4:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/male-anatomy-question/31864/5 "2000-09-03T16:27:40Z")
I’ve watched it a few times myself trying to figure out what the hell they were doing. I never could bring myself to ask anybody about it, though. I have no idea what it’s about. ---
**Author:** ![Crusoe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/49beb7/32.png) [@Crusoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crusoe)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2000, 4:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/male-anatomy-question/31864/6 "2000-09-03T16:35:11Z")
Oh please, everyone knows they only move when the larva are ready to hatch. ---
**Author:** ![FarTreker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/da6949/32.png) [@FarTreker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FarTreker)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2000, 4:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/male-anatomy-question/31864/7 "2000-09-03T16:37:38Z")
Let this be a lesson to you, girls. Don’t judge a man by his package after he’s been sitting in cold water. **Everything** shrinks up for a bit afterwards. ---
**Author:** ![yabob](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/yabob/32/2821_2.png) [@yabob](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/yabob)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2000, 4:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/male-anatomy-question/31864/8 "2000-09-03T16:50:17Z")
You are watching a natural thermostat in action. The scrotum also responds to levels of tension, tightening up to protect valuable resources in “fight or flight” situations. I just had a strange thought, though. For most involuntary muscular responses, some people seem to have concious control over them, and in some cases you can learn concious control of them. If you wanted to go to the effort, could you learn to make your scrotum do tricks? Maybe alternately tighten up one side then the other to “juggle your balls”? You can, of course, tighten up your groin muscles to draw your testicles upwards, but the scrotum doesn’t change. At least I can do that - for all I know it might be one of those things like wiggling your ears or furling your tongue that some people can do and some can’t. Exit, singing “Can you tie 'em in a knot, can you tie 'em in bow …” ---
**Author:** ![FarTreker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/da6949/32.png) [@FarTreker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FarTreker)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2000, 5:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/male-anatomy-question/31864/9 "2000-09-03T17:44:28Z")
'Can you throw ‘em o’er yer shoulder like a Continental soldier?’ ---
**Author:** ![Lumpy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lumpy/32/446_2.png) [@Lumpy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lumpy)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2000, 7:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/male-anatomy-question/31864/10 "2000-09-03T19:06:46Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Bassguy \* > \*\*It is an interesting way to start or finish a conversation: “Honey, wanna watch my balls move?” \*\* My wife doesn’t have to ask. She discovered a ticklish spot on my stomach that all she has to do is stroke it and \ my testicles hike up. She finds this hysterically funny. ---
**Author:** ![Angkins](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/fbc32d/32.png) [@Angkins](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Angkins)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2000, 7:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/male-anatomy-question/31864/11 "2000-09-03T19:35:02Z")
Now you all _KNOW_ I am going to _HAVE TO_ check this out!! **Yeah, honey…are you busy? Come here for a minute, and would you mind taking your pants down? Why? Well, I just wanna watch your balls move. 😃** ---
**Author:** ![Bubble\_Girl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/c0e974/32.png) [@Bubble\_Girl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bubble_Girl)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2000, 9:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/male-anatomy-question/31864/12 "2000-09-03T21:05:18Z")
> [@](#): > > Oh please, everyone knows they only move when the larva are ready to hatch. _ewwwwwwwwww…gross mattk!_ This is interesting though, I did not know this. I learn more new stuff every day just by reading the board. I’m with Angkins, I’m definately going to have to look into this just to see for myself. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![LittleStar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/0ea827/32.png) [@LittleStar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LittleStar)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2000, 9:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/male-anatomy-question/31864/13 "2000-09-03T21:08:17Z")
Yeah, I know…MY BALLS DO THE SAMMMEEE THING! (Fifi and Sparky find all of this absolutely HILARIOUS, by the way…) Actually, j/k…I don’t have any testicles, but I’m sure if I did, they’d be doing the dance all day long. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Homer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/df788c/32.png) [@Homer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Homer)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2000, 9:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/male-anatomy-question/31864/14 "2000-09-03T21:19:08Z")
Man, yet another involuntary muscle I’m going to have to isolate and master. I can slow my heart, can I jiggle my balls? I’m going to have to spend time in the bathroom with a mirror. Well, okay, so I already do that… but now I’ll have a purpose. –Tim ---
**Author:** ![Monster104](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c6cbf5/32.png) [@Monster104](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Monster104)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2000, 9:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/male-anatomy-question/31864/15 "2000-09-03T21:37:27Z")
Well, I’ve found a way to make my testicles move up and down…it’s kinda like flexing pecs, only doing it with your testicles. …I guess that’s not a very good analogy, is it… ---
**Author:** ![Angkins](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/fbc32d/32.png) [@Angkins](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Angkins)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2000, 10:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/male-anatomy-question/31864/16 "2000-09-03T22:22:39Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Homer \* > \*\*Man, yet another involuntary muscle I’m going to have to isolate and master. I can slow my heart, can I jiggle my balls? > > I’m going to have to spend time in the bathroom with a mirror. Well, okay, so I already do that… but now I’ll have a purpose. > > –Tim \*\* OH the images that conjured up in my dirty little mind! Make sure when you jiggle your balls you \*DON’T[/i/ use your hands 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Lizard](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/dfb087/32.png) [@Lizard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lizard)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2000, 11:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/male-anatomy-question/31864/17 "2000-09-03T23:43:48Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by yabob \* > \*\*If you wanted to go to the effort, could you learn to make your scrotum do tricks? Maybe alternately tighten up one side then the other to “juggle your balls”? > \*\* Well, now my plans for this evening are set. I’m going to train my scrotum! But seriously…these days I’d settle for just using it for it’s intended function. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![yosemite](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/3ab097/32.png) [@yosemite](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/yosemite)\ **Post date:** [September 4, 2000, 6:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/male-anatomy-question/31864/18 "2000-09-04T06:54:09Z")
A slight hijack… A friend of mine tells the long story (I won’t relate it all here, and after all, it is _his_ story) of riding his motorcycle for a long time in cold weather. He wasn’t wearing warm enough clothing for the temperature. Apparently his privates sort of got shy and shrunk up inside him, much to his dismay. He went to a gas station, and pulled down his pants and attempted to warm up the affected area by positioning himself under one of those electric hand-dryer things. Just then the gas station attendant walked in. My very embarrassed friend had to explain what had happened. ---
**Author:** ![darkcool](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/5f8ce5/32.png) [@darkcool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/darkcool)\ **Post date:** [September 4, 2000, 9:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/male-anatomy-question/31864/19 "2000-09-04T09:21:37Z")
Homer, try this: Lay (or stand) perfectly still. When you 'nads are still, tighten the muscles you would to stop pee flow for just a second then release They will start churning. At least mine do. Careful about that juggling though, could get a twisted nut sack. No laughing matter! ---
**Author:** ![Homer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/df788c/32.png) [@Homer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Homer)\ **Post date:** [September 4, 2000, 7:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/male-anatomy-question/31864/20 "2000-09-04T19:36:22Z")
Well, I watched for a while in the shower today. Man, that’s creepy lookin. –Tim [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/male-anatomy-question/31864.md?page=2)