# Male Centrism at the Dope **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [June 5, 2018, 12:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/male-centrism-at-the-dope/815437 "2018-06-05T00:04:42Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 29
**Author:** ![ElvisL1ves](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/5daacb/32.png) [@ElvisL1ves](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ElvisL1ves)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2018, 8:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/male-centrism-at-the-dope/815437/561 "2018-06-06T20:51:00Z")
> [@Broomstick](#): > > Two ways: I know. Hence the junior high school comment. ---
**Author:** ![Sunny\_Daze](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sunny_daze/32/438_2.png) [@Sunny\_Daze](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunny_Daze)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2018, 8:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/male-centrism-at-the-dope/815437/562 "2018-06-06T20:56:32Z")
> [@Penfeather](#): > > And here a poster opens a tiny window on what it’s like when the boot is on the other foot and [a serious question about men’s sexual health is met with with a woman sniggering and telling a guffawing anecdote about humiliating a guy at work because limp dicks lol.](https://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showpost.php?p=21003260&postcount=7) I’m trying to imagine what it would be like for men if the board culture meant that smirks and jeers and dumb jokes were the default response to most threads we participated in, and we got told that we were being too sensitive if we took offense. It would be pretty poisonous. That was horrid. ---
**Author:** ![CarnalK](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnalk/32/486_2.png) [@CarnalK](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CarnalK)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2018, 8:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/male-centrism-at-the-dope/815437/563 "2018-06-06T20:57:14Z")
> [@madsircool](#): > > The fact that a GD thread would pull in a much wider number of Dopers isn’t important? The topic matter requires specific examples of poster behaviour. This isn’t a thread about how a generic message board could try to be less of a male wanker board, it’s about THIS one being less of a male wanker board. And when discussing bad behaviour about posters on this board, the rules say it goes here. If you’d like a more generic thread in GD go right ahead. ---
**Author:** ![Fotheringay-Phipps](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/d9b06d/32.png) [@Fotheringay-Phipps](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fotheringay-Phipps)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2018, 9:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/male-centrism-at-the-dope/815437/564 "2018-06-06T21:02:32Z")
> [@CarnalK](#): > > Perhaps I missed it, but I don’t recall anyone using the phrase “mansplaining” in response to Shodan’s exchange with ITD. Perhaps you are inferring that from some other phrases they used? Could you explain exactly where you think his comments were discounted as such? See post #529. ---
**Author:** ![Penfeather](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/penfeather/32/384_2.png) [@Penfeather](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Penfeather)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2018, 9:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/male-centrism-at-the-dope/815437/565 "2018-06-06T21:02:53Z")
> [@Sunny\_Daze](#): > > That was horrid. And **Ivory Tower Denizen** gets enormous kudos from me for taking it seriously. ---
**Author:** ![Broomstick](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/broomstick/32/246_2.png) [@Broomstick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Broomstick)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2018, 9:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/male-centrism-at-the-dope/815437/566 "2018-06-06T21:04:17Z")
> [@Penfeather](#): > > And here a poster opens a tiny window on what it’s like when the boot is on the other foot and [a serious question about men’s sexual health is met with with a woman sniggering and telling a guffawing anecdote about humiliating a guy at work because limp dicks lol.](https://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showpost.php?p=21003260&postcount=7) I’m trying to imagine what it would be like for men if the board culture meant that smirks and jeers and dumb jokes were the default response to most threads we participated in, and we got told that we were being too sensitive if we took offense. It would be pretty poisonous. Yeah, and I called her out for it because frankly that’s bullying, harassment, and not at all funny. You know, like I’d like men to call out other men who are being assholes, bullies, and harassers. Other than that - I’m interested in reading the thread but don’t feel I have anything to contribute by posting there. ---
**Author:** ![Penfeather](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/penfeather/32/384_2.png) [@Penfeather](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Penfeather)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2018, 9:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/male-centrism-at-the-dope/815437/567 "2018-06-06T21:11:38Z")
> [@Broomstick](#): > > You know, like I’d like men to call out other men who are being assholes, bullies, and harassers. I think there’s still the lingering playground attitude of not wanting to be a tell-tale, but if the board culture is going to change for the better it means individuals stepping up and calling out the offenders. And yeah, I think a lot of the onus right now is on men to say out loud ,“Yeah, I’m not happy with that remark”. ---
**Author:** ![Skywatcher](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/skywatcher/32/254_2.png) [@Skywatcher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skywatcher)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2018, 9:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/male-centrism-at-the-dope/815437/568 "2018-06-06T21:16:59Z")
> [@CarnalK](#): > > Are you agreeing that’s dragging out the dirty laundry into IMHO? Yes, given [this post](https://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?p=21000957#post21000957) and the previous, recently bumped, Pit thread. ---
**Author:** ![CarnalK](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnalk/32/486_2.png) [@CarnalK](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CarnalK)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2018, 9:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/male-centrism-at-the-dope/815437/569 "2018-06-06T21:18:55Z")
> [@Fotheringay-Phipps](#): > > See post #529. But that was a one off drive by post responding to a response that doesn’t even directly respond to Shodan. Could you point to a more substantive argument directly against Shodan describing him as “mansplaining”? Really trying to understand your position here. ---
**Author:** ![Helena330](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/helena330/32/531_2.png) [@Helena330](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Helena330)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2018, 9:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/male-centrism-at-the-dope/815437/570 "2018-06-06T21:20:35Z")
> [@Penfeather](#): > > I think there’s still the lingering playground attitude of not wanting to be a tell-tale, but if the board culture is going to change for the better it means individuals stepping up and calling out the offenders. And yeah, I think a lot of the onus right now is on men to say out loud ,“Yeah, I’m not happy with that remark”. I completely agree, and I reported that post last night (or maybe early this morning). ---
**Author:** ![CarnalK](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnalk/32/486_2.png) [@CarnalK](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CarnalK)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2018, 9:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/male-centrism-at-the-dope/815437/571 "2018-06-06T21:25:32Z")
> [@Skywatcher](#): > > Yes, given [this post](https://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?p=21000957#post21000957) and the previous, recently bumped, Pit thread. All that post shows is that DSeid is a little delusional about the level of diversity here. He may be trying to prove a point with his poll, that there’s plenty of women, but he’s not airing dirty laundry and he definitely isn’t doing it for the lolz. Frankly, the poll is probably going to show he’s wrong. ---
**Author:** ![Penfeather](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/penfeather/32/384_2.png) [@Penfeather](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Penfeather)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2018, 9:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/male-centrism-at-the-dope/815437/572 "2018-06-06T21:32:01Z")
> [@Broomstick](#): > > Other than that - I’m interested in reading the thread but don’t feel I have anything to contribute by posting there. And there’s nothing wrong with that, not everybody has to contribute to every thread, especially when you look at something and think, “Well, that’s not my area of experience”. One of the bra fitting threads I looked at a while back and typed up a post about my wife having to buy trainer bras when she moved to New Zealand because most of the cup sizes were too big, but then figured, yeah, but that’s not really _my_ story and this isn’t really my conversation, and besides there’s the lol boobs contingent to consider so I’ll just delete what I’ve typed and move on. Maybe someone will talk about manscaping soon. ---
**Author:** ![Fotheringay-Phipps](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/d9b06d/32.png) [@Fotheringay-Phipps](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fotheringay-Phipps)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2018, 9:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/male-centrism-at-the-dope/815437/573 "2018-06-06T21:40:56Z")
> [@CarnalK](#): > > But that was a one off drive by post responding to a response that doesn’t even directly respond to Shodan. The post which was being quoted was directly responding to Shodan. ITD’s response to Shodan was “_It never gets old_”. Helena summed “it” as “_You’re thinking wrong, little lady. Let me explain it to you_.” IOW, that shodan was mansplaining and there’s no end to that. I’m not 100% sure that Helena was interpreting ITD correctly, but I incline to think she was, especially as ITD offered no other response. ---
**Author:** ![CarnalK](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnalk/32/486_2.png) [@CarnalK](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CarnalK)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2018, 9:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/male-centrism-at-the-dope/815437/574 "2018-06-06T21:43:43Z")
ITD didn’t quote Shodan, so maybe you’re reaching? The timestamps are only a minute apart, she could have been responding to the post above Shodan. Can you not come up with an explicit example? ---
**Author:** ![Fotheringay-Phipps](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/d9b06d/32.png) [@Fotheringay-Phipps](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fotheringay-Phipps)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2018, 9:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/male-centrism-at-the-dope/815437/575 "2018-06-06T21:51:12Z")
That post was right after shodan’s and also followed an extended exchange between ITD and shodan. ---
**Author:** ![CarnalK](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnalk/32/486_2.png) [@CarnalK](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CarnalK)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2018, 9:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/male-centrism-at-the-dope/815437/576 "2018-06-06T21:55:30Z")
> [@Fotheringay-Phipps](#): > > That post was right after shodan’s and also followed an extended exchange between ITD and shodan. Correlation does not prove causation. Really, you can’t find a more explicit example? ---
**Author:** ![Fotheringay-Phipps](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/d9b06d/32.png) [@Fotheringay-Phipps](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fotheringay-Phipps)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2018, 10:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/male-centrism-at-the-dope/815437/577 "2018-06-06T22:01:05Z")
OK, that’s how I interpreted it. YMMV. I could probably find another example but am not inclined to expend a lot of time on it. I seized that example because it was on hand. ETA: in case there’s any confusion, this post is a response to your post which preceded it, though I did not quote you. Same goes for my prior post. And - I see - your prior post as well. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![IvoryTowerDenizen](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ivorytowerdenizen/32/17937_2.png) [@IvoryTowerDenizen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/IvoryTowerDenizen)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2018, 10:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/male-centrism-at-the-dope/815437/578 "2018-06-06T22:06:27Z")
> [@Fotheringay-Phipps](#): > > That post was right after shodan’s and also followed an extended exchange between ITD and shodan. The “never gets old comment” referred to the summary of the situation as “shutting down conversation I dislike”. It was a patronizing dismissal of the deepfelt concerns we are trying to express and trivializing the complexity of the solution. It was that summation, which in some form or another has been presented over and over again, that never gets old. While not mansplaining, it is a different form of condescension. ---
**Author:** ![CarnalK](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnalk/32/486_2.png) [@CarnalK](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CarnalK)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2018, 10:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/male-centrism-at-the-dope/815437/579 "2018-06-06T22:10:06Z")
> [@Fotheringay-Phipps](#): > > OK, that’s how I interpreted it. YMMV. > > I could probably find another example but am not inclined to expend a lot of time on it. I seized that example because it was on hand. Well, only “probably” because you assume you’re correct. Which is an unsteady assumption istm. But I understand how you might not be inclined to expend a lot of time on that. ---
**Author:** ![Tee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/73ab20/32.png) [@Tee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tee)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2018, 11:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/male-centrism-at-the-dope/815437/580 "2018-06-06T23:47:18Z")
> [@Penfeather](#): > > And here a poster opens a tiny window on what it’s like when the boot is on the other foot and [a serious question about men’s sexual health is met with with a woman sniggering and telling a guffawing anecdote about humiliating a guy at work because limp dicks lol.](https://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showpost.php?p=21003260&postcount=7) I’m trying to imagine what it would be like for men if the board culture meant that smirks and jeers and dumb jokes were the default response to most threads we participated in, and we got told that we were being too sensitive if we took offense. It would be pretty poisonous. **Nearwildheaven** is a whackjob. “Gag bridal shower gifts.” Seriously. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/male-centrism-at-the-dope/815437.md?page=28) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/male-centrism-at-the-dope/815437.md?page=30)