Male Dopers: How do YOU masturbate?

It’s working for this gay guy. :smiley:

Right hand on the shaft and then a pumping motion to get me off. It usually only takes a few minutes. Sometimes porn vids, sometimes stories, sometimes just fantasies (those sessions usually take the longest for some reason).

Straight, 29.

Now, that is a Lube name waiting to happen!

Nice Thread title/user handle combo if I ever heard one.

No lady friends – just me and my “sweet little imagination”!

With the weird things that turn me on, it pretty much has to remain “fantasy only”, or I could get into some trouble. Ha!

Iiiii ttttenddddd ttto sssstttay awwwwayyyy frrrommm thhhhe pppppornos, essspeccisallllly thhhhhe onnnnnes withhhhh verrry hotttt annnnd busssssty chhhhhickkkkks.

Iiiiii onnnnnnllllly lassssst abbbbouttt fivvvvve sssseccconnds witttthhhh thhhhhose annnnnnnd thatttttt ainnnnnn’t ggoooodddd ttttraaaaiiiinng forrrrrrr thhhhhe “rrrrreallllll thhhhhhinnnng”!

(Whew Oh. God! );):smiley:

It’s difficult, since I, like many other male posters here, have the Giant Doper Penis of Doom ™. Usually, I call a friend of mine that owns a drive-thru car wash, and arrange to rent the place for about an hour. Gotta have privacy, ya know. Then, I have to hire three or four medical professionals to help me unwind my Giant Doper Penis of Doom, and carefully allign the tip of same with the entrance to the carwash. Finally, I have an assistant pump coins into the carwash. Usually takes at least two deluxe cycles to get me off. And don’t forget the hot wax! Oh…the hot wax…yes, yes. Hot wax is even better than all those rotating brushes with the soapy water…

Sadly, I don’t get to do it all that often. The guy that owns the store across the street complains when his window gets covered with “mayonaise”…

Me too, but fortunately I have big hands.

Right hand, overhand. Left index finger on right nipple.

But technically, it’s not masturbation, as I always invite a virgin. Actually, an EXTRA virgin.

That brings up a question for me too… Too shy to start a whole thread about it… How many straight guys (but hey, gay guys, feel free to chime in too) require nipple stimulation? My dude HAS to have it.

Usually with a porn video or story (book or online).

Right hand on mouse or book, left holding the shaft, stroking up and down, usually doing my best to delay things as long as possible.

Gay guy - nipple stimulation does almost nothing for me, and if done too vigorously is a massive turn off.

Ditto (except I’m straight).

If I happen to be visiting up north, sometimes I can bribe some of the Transit Authority workers to lube up the Lincoln Tunnel for me. It’s a tight fit, but that can be a good thing…

Me too. HAVE to. A finger is good. A tongue is a million times better.

Hence the name Oak (minister to me)!

I say, I say…that’s a joke son! … Foghorn Leghorn

Your post reminds me of that Neil Diamond album cover for (I think) “Hot August Night”, where he made that motion with his two hands and arms like he had a huge “woodie” goin’?



Very light stimulation can be ok… not that I need it every time. Anything more than very very light stimulation for a little bit while we’re into it and it gets distracting and sometimes painful.

23, M, Straight

He likes it pretty rough… sucking, pinching, pulling. I can live without it myself. I’m large breasted and my nipples aren’t particularly sensitive but he’s crazy for it. If I want to get laid all I have to do is start playing with his chest.

Well, first I gotta lube up the undersides of both arms, then reach around the lil’ guy as if I’m giving him a hug, lock my hands together, and just go to town.

I don’t require it and actually rarely use it when masturbating, but I love it when I’m with someone else.

Grip in one hand, lengthwise motion, like (I suspect) most guys. I try to maximize the lead-up time: Yeah, the climax is better, but when it’s over, it’s over. This means using my weaker left hand (which also leaves my right hand for the mouse), and also stopping and waiting when I start getting close. When it comes time for emission, I either pinch my foreskin closed at the end to make a small reservoir, which I later empty into the toilet, or go stand over the bathtub to finish up. I’m usually watching porn at the time.

And my preferences are strictly hetero, since you asked.

Takes notes