# Mamas, don't follow your babies into the men's room **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [August 13, 2009, 3:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mamas-dont-follow-your-babies-into-the-mens-room/506294 "2009-08-13T15:32:03Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 10
**Author:** ![Lynn\_Bodoni](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e47c2d/32.png) [@Lynn\_Bodoni](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lynn_Bodoni)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2009, 1:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mamas-dont-follow-your-babies-into-the-mens-room/506294/181 "2009-08-16T01:28:54Z")
> [@Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](#): > > As a male teacher, attitudes like this burn me up. It’s the sort of sexism against men that actually matters: if a person with this attitude ended up in any sort of supervisory role over me, my livelihood would be in danger, because of a pernicious bigotry. Yeah, my husband looked into volunteering with toddlers and preschoolers. He loves them in the same way that I love kittens, that is, there’s nothing sexual about it. However, there are just so many hoops and barriers and precautions that he’d have to take that he just decided not to bother. Instead, he plays with his great nieces and nephews, and spoils them rotten. It’s a pity, because there are a lot of kids who could use a positive male role model in their lives, and because my husband would enjoy it. ---
**Author:** ![billfish678](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7bcc69/32.png) [@billfish678](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/billfish678)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2009, 1:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mamas-dont-follow-your-babies-into-the-mens-room/506294/182 "2009-08-16T01:32:43Z")
> [@TruCelt](#): > > In the case that a person with special needs stated an immediate need (whether nerve damage or diarrhea) I would probably just accompany them in. > > In the case that I was responding to above, where someone just rudely tried to push past me (or threatened to put a crutch somewhere unpleasant) I would certainly do whatever was necessary to keep the lunatic away from my two-year-old child. STEP ASIDE WOMAN. I GOTS ME A CHILLIN TO DONE BE MOLESTERING ALREADY! Please get that on video if you can. My youtube collection is getting a bit worn. If you can get some Canadian panhandlers in the background looking shocked that would be a bonus. You know what? Before your absurd posts, I “might” have considered bowing to this absurd level of child overprotection… But now???.. I WILL make SURE if some dufus like you tries to keep me out of a public bathroom…they will have to beat the crap out of me to keep me from going in…and then I’ll sue their asses off after the fact. ---
**Author:** ![Lynn\_Bodoni](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e47c2d/32.png) [@Lynn\_Bodoni](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lynn_Bodoni)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2009, 1:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mamas-dont-follow-your-babies-into-the-mens-room/506294/183 "2009-08-16T01:33:56Z")
> [@](#): > > In the case that I was responding to above, where someone just rudely tried to push past me (or threatened to put a crutch somewhere unpleasant) I would certainly do whatever was necessary to keep the lunatic away from my two-year-old child. A 2 year old child needs to be accompanied in a restroom, no matter what its sex is. For one thing, it can’t reach the sink. Second, I don’t know about other people, but if I’m in a rush to get to the bathroom, I do NOT have the luxury of explaining myself to a paranoid parent. I need to get in there NOW, and anyone who blocks my way, physically, is likely to get shoved aside, if I’m able to do that. YOU are the one who initiates the rudeness here, by trying to block other people from using public facilities. Don’t be surprised when your rudeness is met with more rudeness. ---
**Author:** ![Liberal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/848f3c/32.png) [@Liberal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Liberal)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2009, 1:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mamas-dont-follow-your-babies-into-the-mens-room/506294/184 "2009-08-16T01:34:15Z")
> [@MsWhatsit](#): > > There is no situation in which one of the two following scenarios is not possible: 1, kid goes into bathroom with me, or 2, kid goes into bathroom alone and I stay cool and don’t pull any Chuck Norris moves on random passersby. Or Chuck Norris is the one going in. ---
**Author:** ![MsWhatsit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/eb8c5e/32.png) [@MsWhatsit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MsWhatsit)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2009, 1:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mamas-dont-follow-your-babies-into-the-mens-room/506294/185 "2009-08-16T01:34:59Z")
Chuck Norris doesn’t go to the bathroom. The bathroom comes to him. ---
**Author:** ![Liberal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/848f3c/32.png) [@Liberal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Liberal)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2009, 1:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mamas-dont-follow-your-babies-into-the-mens-room/506294/186 "2009-08-16T01:43:48Z")
> [@Lynn\_Bodoni](#): > > A 2 year old child needs to be accompanied in a restroom, no matter what its sex is. For one thing, it can’t reach the sink. Most 2-year-olds aren’t even potty trained, are they? Regarding LHoD and similar issues, the problem is that it really doesn’t take more than an accusation by some disgruntled kid for an entire life and career to be ruined, even if the teacher or mentor is exhonerated by the court. Even a pre-trial headline, “Man Denies Molestation Charges” doesn’t really do anything but make matters worse. It might not happen statistically often, but the reward for serving would have to be substantial since the risk is there. ---
**Author:** ![Bryan\_Ekers](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bryan_ekers/32/183_2.png) [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2009, 1:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mamas-dont-follow-your-babies-into-the-mens-room/506294/187 "2009-08-16T01:45:07Z")
Chuck Norris never feels the urgent need to piss. The piss knows to politely wait. ---
**Author:** ![SteveG1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bb73d2/32.png) [@SteveG1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SteveG1)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2009, 1:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mamas-dont-follow-your-babies-into-the-mens-room/506294/188 "2009-08-16T01:51:11Z")
> [@MsWhatsit](#): > > You sound like a crazy person here. There is no hypothetical situation in which you absolutely must send your child into a public bathroom that you cannot enter. Your kid is two. Take him (or her?) into the freaking bathroom with you. Nobody will bat their eyes twice at a 2-year-old, who is basically still a baby, in a public bathroom with its parent. > > The idea of physically blocking someone from getting into a public bathroom because my kid happens to be inside doing his business is just… it’s just crazy. I mean, seriously nutbar crazy. I have three kids, and have sometimes had to juggle bathroom trips out in public when I’m the only adult with them, and never, ever, never in a million years would it occur to me to actually physically block someone else from going into a bathroom my kid was in. If it’s that big a deal, the kid is coming into the other bathroom along with me. There is no situation in which one of the two following scenarios is not possible: 1, kid goes into bathroom with me, or 2, kid goes into bathroom alone and I stay cool and don’t pull any Chuck Norris moves on random passersby. Try to block me, and I will pee on your shoes. When I have to go, I have to go NOW. ---
**Author:** ![running\_coach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/running_coach/32/15836_2.png) [@running\_coach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/running_coach)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2009, 1:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mamas-dont-follow-your-babies-into-the-mens-room/506294/189 "2009-08-16T01:53:30Z")
> [@MsWhatsit](#): > > Chuck Norris doesn’t go to the bathroom. The bathroom comes to him. > [@Bryan\_Ekers](#): > > Chuck Norris never feels the urgent need to piss. The piss knows to politely wait. No bathroom has survived Chuck Norris. And I’m another who goes from normal to EMERGENCY in seconds. I actually have to watch what I eat up to 24 hours before if I won’t be within easy reach of a restroom. And no one is getting in my way. ---
**Author:** ![Freudian\_Slit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/5daacb/32.png) [@Freudian\_Slit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Freudian_Slit)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2009, 4:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mamas-dont-follow-your-babies-into-the-mens-room/506294/190 "2009-08-16T04:31:32Z")
**TruCelt** , if you had a male child who was old enough to handle bathroom issues on his own (I don’t know how old that is–five or six?) but young enough where he’s still a target to pedophiles, would you prevent other men from going into a bathroom where he was? Because that to me seems excessive. ---
**Author:** ![Meyer6](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/cc9497/32.png) [@Meyer6](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Meyer6)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2009, 4:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mamas-dont-follow-your-babies-into-the-mens-room/506294/191 "2009-08-16T04:36:30Z")
> [@TruCelt](#): > > In the case that a person with special needs stated an immediate need (whether nerve damage or diarrhea) I would probably just accompany them in. I don’t think you have the right to demand that grown adults explain their bathroom issues to you before they get a ‘pass’ to enter a public washroom. It’s somewaht ironic that you are trying to defend a two year olds ‘privacy and safety’ but would happily ask somebody to describe their diarrhea to you. ---
**Author:** ![SteveG1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bb73d2/32.png) [@SteveG1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SteveG1)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2009, 4:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mamas-dont-follow-your-babies-into-the-mens-room/506294/192 "2009-08-16T04:39:06Z")
> [@Freudian\_Slit](#): > > **TruCelt** , if you had a male child who was old enough to handle bathroom issues on his own (I don’t know how old that is–five or six?) but young enough where he’s still a target to pedophiles, would you prevent other men from going into a bathroom where he was? Because that to me seems excessive. It seems to me, the presence of other men (several) would provide protection. I don’t think a molester wants witnesses or an angry mob beating on him. ---
**Author:** ![Fear\_Itself](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fear_itself/32/19637_2.png) [@Fear\_Itself](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fear_Itself)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2009, 4:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mamas-dont-follow-your-babies-into-the-mens-room/506294/193 "2009-08-16T04:42:43Z")
I would think a man preventing others from entering a public bathroom might be hiding something inside. How do I know your buddy isn’t raping a little girl in there? ---
**Author:** ![Nicolas\_Bourbaki](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/ecc23a/32.png) [@Nicolas\_Bourbaki](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nicolas_Bourbaki)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2009, 5:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mamas-dont-follow-your-babies-into-the-mens-room/506294/194 "2009-08-16T05:11:32Z")
> [@Fear\_Itself](#): > > I would think a man preventing others from entering a public bathroom might be hiding something inside. How do I know your buddy isn’t raping a little girl in there? FTW. If someone without a uniform is trying to physically bar me from the restroom, the only reasonable conclusion is they’re lying about something shady. Not necessarily rapin’, of course, but something hella suspicious. ---
**Author:** ![Chimera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/8e8cbc/32.png) [@Chimera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chimera)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2009, 5:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mamas-dont-follow-your-babies-into-the-mens-room/506294/195 "2009-08-16T05:18:58Z")
> [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](#): > > You have no right to ask anyone to wait a single second. If you ever tried to physically block anyone from using the bathroom, you would be guilty of a criminal assault. Most likely she’d be the VICTIM of a criminal assault. ---
**Author:** ![Marlitharn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/779978/32.png) [@Marlitharn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marlitharn)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2009, 6:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mamas-dont-follow-your-babies-into-the-mens-room/506294/196 "2009-08-16T06:58:24Z")
> [@TruCelt](#): > > You have no idea what you are talking about. Please do not imagine that you have enough information to question my overall childrearing skills simply because we disagree on one point about my child’s right to privacy and safety. > > We were discussing the very narrow hypothetical case in which it was for some strange reason necessary for me to send the Celtling into a public bathroom which I could not enter. In that case, no other adult is going in there either until she’s finished. > > It’s not like I’m taking food from somebody’s mouth. > > In the case that a person with special needs stated an immediate need (whether nerve damage or diarrhea) I would probably just accompany them in. > > In the case that I was responding to above, where someone just rudely tried to push past me (or threatened to put a crutch somewhere unpleasant) I would certainly do whatever was necessary to keep the lunatic away from my two-year-old child. Good lord, woman, get a freaking grip before you give yourself an ulcer. I’ve managed to so far raise two kids to adulthood and tweenhood, respectively, without feeling the need to throw body checks on other adults who threatened to move within three feet of them. I’m not delusional enough to think that the world owes me any special considerations or treatment because I’ve bred twice, nor that my kids are any more special than anyone else’s kids. People have to pee. Trying to stop them because OMG anyone who comes near little Precious must be a child molester!!:eek: is dimwitted, short-sighted, and assholish. ---
**Author:** ![Hilarity\_N.Suze](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hilarity_n.suze/32/6223_2.png) [@Hilarity\_N.Suze](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hilarity_N.Suze)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2009, 7:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mamas-dont-follow-your-babies-into-the-mens-room/506294/197 "2009-08-16T07:03:03Z")
> [@Freudian\_Slit](#): > > Well, as someone ( **Left Hand**?) posted above, most schools make you clear it with them beforehand. Anyway, the password thing seems silly. If you were going to get picked up by someone, wouldn’t you have met the stranger already? It’s not like your mom’s going to choose some random dude who you’ve never met before to pick you up. It would probably be a neighbor or a relative, no? > [@MsWhatsit](#): > > The password thing is completely ridiculous. Either the kid is getting picked up by someone they’re familiar with, in which case a password is unnecessary, or Mom/Dad is going to call the school or babysitter and let them know there’s a problem. So all the kid needs to know is, if some unfamiliar dude says that he was sent by Mom and Dad to pick you up, you say, sorry, Charlie, and don’t go. No sekrit passwords necessary. My kids’ school had this in the 80s, and we actually used it. The situation was that my husband, at the time a professional driver, was at work and 60 miles away. I was at work at my normally 45-minute commute. A snowstorm descended upon the area, the school was closing, and because of the conditions we figured it would take a minimum of 2 hours to get there. Meanwhile the school was two blocks from our house, and our oldest kid had the key. So one of my husband’s coworkers who was NOT 60 miles away was dispatched to pick up the little nosepickers and deliver them home. They were the last kids there. The password, “pepperoni,” was duly communicated to the coworker, who forgot it. When the teacher asked him what the password was he said “something to do with pizza.” My oldest son said, “Close enough.” The fact that the stranger drove a truck with the same logo as the one his father drove probably helped a bit. ---
**Author:** ![leander](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/bcef8e/32.png) [@leander](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/leander)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2009, 8:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mamas-dont-follow-your-babies-into-the-mens-room/506294/198 "2009-08-16T08:44:31Z")
> [@Lynn\_Bodoni](#): > > A 2 year old child needs to be accompanied in a restroom, no matter what its sex is. For one thing, it can’t reach the sink. > > Second, I don’t know about other people, but if I’m in a rush to get to the bathroom, I do NOT have the luxury of explaining myself to a paranoid parent. I need to get in there NOW, and anyone who blocks my way, physically, is likely to get shoved aside, if I’m able to do that. YOU are the one who initiates the rudeness here, by trying to block other people from using public facilities. Don’t be surprised when your rudeness is met with more rudeness. Exactly. I have a two year old son and I would never let him go into a bathroom alone. If he is with my wife they will go into the ladies and they can always go into a stall and close the door. Frankly, it will be awhile until he can go on his own, and even then me or the misses would take him in (even if we’re just standing outside the stall). As far as a crazy lady blocking the door, sorry, but I would also simply push past you. If you became aggressive I would call the cops and you would be arrest for assault. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Fight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/90ced4/32.png) [@Cat\_Fight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Fight)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2009, 11:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mamas-dont-follow-your-babies-into-the-mens-room/506294/199 "2009-08-16T11:24:49Z")
> [@SteveG1](#): > > It seems to me, the presence of other men (several) would provide protection. I don’t think a molester wants witnesses or an angry mob beating on him. This is an excellent point. Because event though I kind of get that parenting can make you do the crazy (and even though I went to a primary school where a stranger molested several girls. In the bathroom. After pulling the ‘I’m a friend of your parents’ thing), you’ve got to not only presume someone going into the loo is a molester, but that any other guy who comes across him fondling or flashing or kid whining ‘I don’t know you!’ is going to ignore it. I suppose he could say oh I don’t know, ‘Here little Jimmy, my son, let me help you pee in this stall’ (assuming there’s even a door), but that’s where warning the kid about stranger danger and singing the ‘My Body’s Nobody’s Body But Mine’ song comes in. Or taking them in yourself, if they’re young enough. As others have pointed out, like sexual assault, it’s much easier to pretend that the danger comes from a stranger in an alley. Because when you acknowledge the stats, if you’re already in a paranoid state, you’ve got to shift your feelings of fear from imaginary creeps and unknown people to men you know and love, rather than taking things on a case-by-case basis and communicating with your kid. ---
**Author:** ![ivan\_astikov](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/58f4c7/32.png) [@ivan\_astikov](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ivan_astikov)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2009, 11:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mamas-dont-follow-your-babies-into-the-mens-room/506294/200 "2009-08-16T11:39:14Z")
> [@](#): > > “kids in the ball pit at McD’s have been molested in seconds!” Child molesters today! :rolleyes: You used to get a good 10 minutes when I was a lad! [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mamas-dont-follow-your-babies-into-the-mens-room/506294.md?page=9) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mamas-dont-follow-your-babies-into-the-mens-room/506294.md?page=11)