# Mama's gonna buy you a ... (a game) **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [May 26, 2004, 1:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mamas-gonna-buy-you-a-a-game/247099 "2004-05-26T01:10:40Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 10
**Author:** ![Nightwatch\_Trailer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/9dc877/32.png) [@Nightwatch\_Trailer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nightwatch_Trailer)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2004, 8:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mamas-gonna-buy-you-a-a-game/247099/181 "2004-05-29T20:02:01Z")
Mama Lynn Bodoni will seal your fate. And if Lynn shows some empathy… ---
**Author:** ![swampbear](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/swampbear/32/467_2.png) [@swampbear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/swampbear)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2004, 11:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mamas-gonna-buy-you-a-a-game/247099/182 "2004-05-29T23:32:51Z")
> [@Nightwatch Trailer](#): > > Mama Lynn Bodoni will seal your fate. > And if Lynn shows some empathy… Mama’s gonna send her some Godiva chocolates and tea And if that tea has to much caffiene… ---
**Author:** ![TeaElle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/8491ac/32.png) [@TeaElle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TeaElle)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2004, 11:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mamas-gonna-buy-you-a-a-game/247099/183 "2004-05-29T23:34:51Z")
Mama’ll be nice and wired for Dope-a-Ween! And if Dope-A-Ween fails to ring your bell… ---
**Author:** ![OneYogini](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/b9e5f3/32.png) [@OneYogini](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OneYogini)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2004, 11:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mamas-gonna-buy-you-a-a-game/247099/184 "2004-05-29T23:51:25Z")
then surely the Admin will doom this thread to hell and if in hell this thread won’t burn ---
**Author:** ![danceswithcats](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/9e8a1a/32.png) [@danceswithcats](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/danceswithcats)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2004, 12:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mamas-gonna-buy-you-a-a-game/247099/185 "2004-05-30T00:31:31Z")
Mama’s gonna buy you a boston fern. If that boston fern turns brown, Mama’s gonna buy you a wedding gown If that wedding gown gets soiled, Mama’s gonna buy you a field of oil If that field of oil don’t pump, Mama’s gonna buy you Forrest Gump If Forrest don’t run fast enough ---
**Author:** ![Captain\_Carrot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f0a364/32.png) [@Captain\_Carrot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Captain_Carrot)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2004, 12:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mamas-gonna-buy-you-a-a-game/247099/186 "2004-05-30T00:56:15Z")
Mama’s gonna buy a real Kenyan. And if he just ain’t got the yen, ---
**Author:** ![ZombiesAteMyBrain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/b4bc9f/32.png) [@ZombiesAteMyBrain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZombiesAteMyBrain)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2004, 2:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mamas-gonna-buy-you-a-a-game/247099/187 "2004-05-30T02:00:25Z")
> [@danceswithcats](#): > > If Forrest don’t run fast enough He’ll have to appear on ‘Call my Bluff’ And if he don’t make a TV star He can always come and wash the car But if he leaves that car too streaky ---
**Author:** ![Sternvogel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bc79bd/32.png) [@Sternvogel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sternvogel)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2004, 6:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mamas-gonna-buy-you-a-a-game/247099/188 "2004-05-30T06:30:15Z")
> [@ZombiesAteMyBrain](#): > > But if he leaves that car too streaky Momma’s gonna dig up [Louis Leakey](http://www.mnsu.edu/emuseum/information/biography/klmno/leakey_louis.html) And if she gets lost in Olduvai Gorge… ---
**Author:** ![ZombiesAteMyBrain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/b4bc9f/32.png) [@ZombiesAteMyBrain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZombiesAteMyBrain)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2004, 12:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mamas-gonna-buy-you-a-a-game/247099/189 "2004-05-30T12:37:23Z")
> [@Sternvogel](#): > > And if she gets lost in Olduvai Gorge… She’ll be assimilated by the Borg [?] And if Picard won’t come to her rescue ---
**Author:** ![nocturnal\_tick](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/3d9bf3/32.png) [@nocturnal\_tick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nocturnal_tick)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2004, 1:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mamas-gonna-buy-you-a-a-game/247099/190 "2004-05-30T13:38:09Z")
_And if Picard won’t come to her rescue_ She wake up from her dream with a mighty flu, And if that flu makes her icky and gross… ---
**Author:** ![ZombiesAteMyBrain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/b4bc9f/32.png) [@ZombiesAteMyBrain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZombiesAteMyBrain)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2004, 1:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mamas-gonna-buy-you-a-a-game/247099/191 "2004-05-30T13:45:33Z")
> [@nocturnal\_tick](#): > > And if that flu makes her icky and gross… I’ll get some drugs and give her a dose. And if to the drugs she just says NO ---
**Author:** ![twickster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ec9cab/32.png) [@twickster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/twickster)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2004, 3:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mamas-gonna-buy-you-a-a-game/247099/192 "2004-05-30T15:22:06Z")
Nancy Reagan will say “Hey! Way to go!” And if Nancy Reagan’s facelift should snap… ---
**Author:** ![OneYogini](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/b9e5f3/32.png) [@OneYogini](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OneYogini)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2004, 3:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mamas-gonna-buy-you-a-a-game/247099/193 "2004-05-30T15:32:59Z")
momma’s gonna need an afternoon nap and if momma can’t get some proper rest… ---
**Author:** ![ZombiesAteMyBrain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/b4bc9f/32.png) [@ZombiesAteMyBrain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZombiesAteMyBrain)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2004, 3:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mamas-gonna-buy-you-a-a-game/247099/194 "2004-05-30T15:48:42Z")
> [@OneYogini](#): > > and if momma can’t get some proper rest… She can have hot sex with Georgie Best And if he has no balls left ---
**Author:** ![OneYogini](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/b9e5f3/32.png) [@OneYogini](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OneYogini)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2004, 4:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mamas-gonna-buy-you-a-a-game/247099/195 "2004-05-30T16:02:23Z")
momma’ll have to find someone a bit more deft and if momma can’t get you a date with [Adam Scott](http://sports.espn.go.com/golf/players/profile?playerId=388) ---
**Author:** ![ZombiesAteMyBrain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/b4bc9f/32.png) [@ZombiesAteMyBrain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZombiesAteMyBrain)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2004, 4:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mamas-gonna-buy-you-a-a-game/247099/196 "2004-05-30T16:25:41Z")
> [@OneYogini](#): > > momma’ll have to find someone a bit more deft > and if momma can’t get you a date with [Adam Scott](http://sports.espn.go.com/golf/players/profile?playerId=388) She can try Brad Pitt - he’s much more hot But if Brad won’t perform for me ---
**Author:** ![nocturnal\_tick](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/3d9bf3/32.png) [@nocturnal\_tick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nocturnal_tick)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2004, 5:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mamas-gonna-buy-you-a-a-game/247099/197 "2004-05-30T17:46:51Z")
_But if Brad won’t perform for me_ You’ll just have to settle for the washing machine, 😛 And if those “vibes” make your butt numb… ---
**Author:** ![ZombiesAteMyBrain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/b4bc9f/32.png) [@ZombiesAteMyBrain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZombiesAteMyBrain)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2004, 6:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mamas-gonna-buy-you-a-a-game/247099/198 "2004-05-30T18:48:42Z")
> [@nocturnal\_tick](#): > > And if those “vibes” make your butt numb… Mama’s gonna buy me a titanium bum. And if my pants won’t fit on my shiny new parts ---
**Author:** ![Tikki](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/5daacb/32.png) [@Tikki](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tikki)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2004, 7:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mamas-gonna-buy-you-a-a-game/247099/199 "2004-05-30T19:05:03Z")
I’ll fart some atomic farts And if those farts should be duds ---
**Author:** ![Sternvogel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bc79bd/32.png) [@Sternvogel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sternvogel)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2004, 10:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mamas-gonna-buy-you-a-a-game/247099/200 "2004-05-30T22:00:56Z")
> [@Tikki](#): > > And if those farts should be duds Mama’s gonna take me to Elmer Fudd’s And if “Fuddsie” gets out his gun… [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mamas-gonna-buy-you-a-a-game/247099.md?page=9) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mamas-gonna-buy-you-a-a-game/247099.md?page=11)