# Mama's gonna buy you a ... (a game) **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [May 26, 2004, 1:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mamas-gonna-buy-you-a-a-game/247099 "2004-05-26T01:10:40Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 16
**Author:** ![swampbear](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/swampbear/32/467_2.png) [@swampbear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/swampbear)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2004, 7:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mamas-gonna-buy-you-a-a-game/247099/301 "2004-06-04T19:06:43Z")
> [@Biffy the Elephant Shrew](#): > > Mama’s gonna ship you off to Constantinople > > If Constantinople gets the works… Mama’s gonna reel in a doper who lurks. And if this thread finally makes threadspotting… It made threadspotting! ---
**Author:** ![OneYogini](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/b9e5f3/32.png) [@OneYogini](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OneYogini)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2004, 7:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mamas-gonna-buy-you-a-a-game/247099/302 "2004-06-04T19:12:23Z")
_And if this thread finally makes threadspotting…_ momma’s gonna start with all her “I” dotting and if her "T"s should need their crossings ---
**Author:** ![swampbear](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/swampbear/32/467_2.png) [@swampbear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/swampbear)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2004, 7:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mamas-gonna-buy-you-a-a-game/247099/303 "2004-06-04T19:20:11Z")
> [@OneYogini](#): > > _And if this thread finally makes threadspotting…_ > > momma’s gonna start with all her “I” dotting > and if her "T"s should need their crossings Mama’s also gonna make sure their teeth they’re flossing. and if that dental floss is not mint… ---
**Author:** ![Biffy\_the\_Elephant\_Shrew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e47c2d/32.png) [@Biffy\_the\_Elephant\_Shrew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Biffy_the_Elephant_Shrew)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2004, 11:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mamas-gonna-buy-you-a-a-game/247099/304 "2004-06-04T23:17:37Z")
> [@swampbear](#): > > and if that dental floss is not mint… Mama’s gonna buy you a Ronson flint And if that flint don’t make a spark… ---
**Author:** ![ZombiesAteMyBrain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/b4bc9f/32.png) [@ZombiesAteMyBrain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZombiesAteMyBrain)\ **Post date:** [June 5, 2004, 2:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mamas-gonna-buy-you-a-a-game/247099/305 "2004-06-05T02:40:26Z")
> [@Biffy the Elephant Shrew](#): > > Mama’s gonna buy you a Ronson flint > And if that flint don’t make a spark… Mama’s gonna strip off in the park And if her strip show doesn’t draw attention ---
**Author:** ![Biffy\_the\_Elephant\_Shrew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e47c2d/32.png) [@Biffy\_the\_Elephant\_Shrew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Biffy_the_Elephant_Shrew)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2004, 2:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mamas-gonna-buy-you-a-a-game/247099/306 "2004-06-06T02:05:25Z")
> [@ZombiesAteMyBrain](#): > > And if her strip show doesn’t draw attention Mama’s gonna take you to a Star Trek convention And if that convention has no guest stars… ---
**Author:** ![ZombiesAteMyBrain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/b4bc9f/32.png) [@ZombiesAteMyBrain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZombiesAteMyBrain)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2004, 2:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mamas-gonna-buy-you-a-a-game/247099/307 "2004-06-06T02:27:53Z")
> [@Biffy the Elephant Shrew](#): > > Mama’s gonna take you to a Star Trek convention > > And if that convention has no guest stars… Mama’s gonna take them on a trip to Mars. And if old Dubya won’t pay for the trip ---
**Author:** ![nocturnal\_tick](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/3d9bf3/32.png) [@nocturnal\_tick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nocturnal_tick)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2004, 10:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mamas-gonna-buy-you-a-a-game/247099/308 "2004-06-06T10:29:36Z")
_And if old Dubya won’t pay for the trip_ Momma’s gonna get you a piercing on your nip, And if that piercing starts to go septic… ---
**Author:** ![twickster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ec9cab/32.png) [@twickster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/twickster)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2004, 12:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mamas-gonna-buy-you-a-a-game/247099/309 "2004-06-06T12:06:49Z")
Mama’s gonna have a fit epileptic. And if Mama should swallow her tongue… ---
**Author:** ![ZombiesAteMyBrain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/b4bc9f/32.png) [@ZombiesAteMyBrain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZombiesAteMyBrain)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2004, 12:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mamas-gonna-buy-you-a-a-game/247099/310 "2004-06-06T12:07:44Z")
> [@nocturnal\_tick](#): > > _And if old Dubya won’t pay for the trip_ > > Momma’s gonna get you a piercing on your nip, > And if that piercing starts to go septic… Mama’s gonna tell you not to be a sceptic 'Cause if Bush hadn’t his Dick Cheney peircing ---
**Author:** ![nocturnal\_tick](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/3d9bf3/32.png) [@nocturnal\_tick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nocturnal_tick)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2004, 2:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mamas-gonna-buy-you-a-a-game/247099/311 "2004-06-06T14:28:43Z")
_And if Mama should swallow her tongue…_ She’s gonna buy you some home-grown dung, And if that dung don’t help your plants to grow… ---
**Author:** ![ZombiesAteMyBrain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/b4bc9f/32.png) [@ZombiesAteMyBrain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZombiesAteMyBrain)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2004, 5:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mamas-gonna-buy-you-a-a-game/247099/312 "2004-06-06T17:16:07Z")
> [@nocturnal\_tick](#): > > _And if Mama should swallow her tongue…_ > > She’s gonna buy you some home-grown dung, > And if that dung don’t help your plants to grow… Mama’s gonna shop you on the Ricki Lake show And if this show doesn’t make you disown her ---
**Author:** ![nocturnal\_tick](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/3d9bf3/32.png) [@nocturnal\_tick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nocturnal_tick)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2004, 7:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mamas-gonna-buy-you-a-a-game/247099/313 "2004-06-06T19:49:28Z")
_And if this show doesn’t make you disown her_ Momma’s gonna make you be a blood donor, And if that nurse can’t find a vein… ---
**Author:** ![emekthian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ecae2f/32.png) [@emekthian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/emekthian)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2004, 8:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mamas-gonna-buy-you-a-a-game/247099/314 "2004-06-06T20:23:13Z")
Mama’s gonna buy you the Northern European Plain and if that plain gets conquered by Germans… ---
**Author:** ![ZombiesAteMyBrain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/b4bc9f/32.png) [@ZombiesAteMyBrain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZombiesAteMyBrain)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2004, 8:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mamas-gonna-buy-you-a-a-game/247099/315 "2004-06-06T20:31:36Z")
> [@emekthian](#): > > Mama’s gonna buy you the Northern European Plain > and if that plain gets conquered by Germans… Mama’s gonna hit them with one of her pans And if those Germans try to surrender ---
**Author:** ![OneYogini](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/b9e5f3/32.png) [@OneYogini](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OneYogini)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2004, 11:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mamas-gonna-buy-you-a-a-game/247099/316 "2004-06-06T23:31:38Z")
_And if those Germans try to surrender_ momma’s gonna go on a cheap gin bender and if momma’s bender starts to get a little stale ---
**Author:** ![Biffy\_the\_Elephant\_Shrew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e47c2d/32.png) [@Biffy\_the\_Elephant\_Shrew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Biffy_the_Elephant_Shrew)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2004, 2:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mamas-gonna-buy-you-a-a-game/247099/317 "2004-06-07T02:15:06Z")
> [@OneYogini](#): > > momma’s gonna go on a cheap gin bender > and if momma’s bender starts to get a little stale Mama’s gonna buy you the Holy Grail But if that Grail cannot be found… ---
**Author:** ![ZombiesAteMyBrain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/b4bc9f/32.png) [@ZombiesAteMyBrain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZombiesAteMyBrain)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2004, 2:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mamas-gonna-buy-you-a-a-game/247099/318 "2004-06-07T02:39:30Z")
> [@Biffy the Elephant Shrew](#): > > Mama’s gonna buy you the Holy Grail > But if that Grail cannot be found… Mama’s gonna go digging up a burial mound And if she can’t find no saintly relics ---
**Author:** ![emekthian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ecae2f/32.png) [@emekthian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/emekthian)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2004, 2:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mamas-gonna-buy-you-a-a-game/247099/319 "2004-06-07T02:46:26Z")
mama’s gonna buy you tickits for the Knicks and if the Knicks don’t score one point ---
**Author:** ![ZombiesAteMyBrain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/b4bc9f/32.png) [@ZombiesAteMyBrain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZombiesAteMyBrain)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2004, 2:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mamas-gonna-buy-you-a-a-game/247099/320 "2004-06-07T02:53:38Z")
> [@emekthian](#): > > mama’s gonna buy you tickits for the Knicks > and if the Knicks don’t score one point Mama’s gonna chill out and smoke a joint And if that joint don’t get her stoned [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mamas-gonna-buy-you-a-a-game/247099.md?page=15) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mamas-gonna-buy-you-a-a-game/247099.md?page=17)