# Mama's gonna buy you a ... (a game) **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [May 26, 2004, 1:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mamas-gonna-buy-you-a-a-game/247099 "2004-05-26T01:10:40Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 9
**Author:** ![OneYogini](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/b9e5f3/32.png) [@OneYogini](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OneYogini)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2004, 1:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mamas-gonna-buy-you-a-a-game/247099/161 "2004-05-29T13:57:03Z")
momma’ll will again litigate for untold riches and if those riches won’t soon be yours momma’ll make sure you stay indoors and if confinement won’t help you heal momma’s gonna get you a “spot” on “the wheel” and if your fortune’s not won on t.v. momma’s gonna take you to live by the sea and if you hate that sand getting in your crack… ---
**Author:** ![twickster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ec9cab/32.png) [@twickster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/twickster)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2004, 2:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mamas-gonna-buy-you-a-a-game/247099/162 "2004-05-29T14:13:26Z")
You can join with Whitney in saying “crack is whack.” And if you realize that that’s not what that means… ---
**Author:** ![OneYogini](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/b9e5f3/32.png) [@OneYogini](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OneYogini)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2004, 2:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mamas-gonna-buy-you-a-a-game/247099/163 "2004-05-29T14:19:00Z")
you can trade your sand for “magic beans” and if those beans don’t make you trip… ---
**Author:** ![Cartooniverse](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cartooniverse/32/3084_2.png) [@Cartooniverse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cartooniverse)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2004, 2:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mamas-gonna-buy-you-a-a-game/247099/164 "2004-05-29T14:31:54Z")
You can go and hide under Momma’s slip. And if doing that gives your mind a schism… ---
**Author:** ![OneYogini](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/b9e5f3/32.png) [@OneYogini](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OneYogini)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2004, 2:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mamas-gonna-buy-you-a-a-game/247099/165 "2004-05-29T14:45:23Z")
momma’s knows you’ll be accused of amoralism and since your morals won’t be a tell momma’s gonna pray you won’t go to hell and if that prayer won’t save your soul momma’s gonna dance around a totem pole and if that dance won’t cause a rain momma’s gonna send you to [bahrain](http://www.bahraintourism.com/) and if you can’t find happiness there ---
**Author:** ![TeaElle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/8491ac/32.png) [@TeaElle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TeaElle)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2004, 2:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mamas-gonna-buy-you-a-a-game/247099/166 "2004-05-29T14:55:48Z")
Mama’s gonna cut up your old teddy bear (hey, tickets to Bahrain are expensive, kid!) And if cut up teddy makes you cry… ---
**Author:** ![swampbear](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/swampbear/32/467_2.png) [@swampbear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/swampbear)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2004, 3:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mamas-gonna-buy-you-a-a-game/247099/167 "2004-05-29T15:33:02Z")
> [@TeaElle](#): > > Mama’s gonna cut up your old teddy bear (hey, tickets to Bahrain are expensive, kid!) > And if cut up teddy makes you cry… Mama’s gonna sell you to Captain Bligh. And if Captain Bligh ain’t satisfied… ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2004, 4:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mamas-gonna-buy-you-a-a-game/247099/168 "2004-05-29T16:19:40Z")
Mama’s gonna bid Captain Bligh bigh-bigh And if Captain Bligh should then mutiny ---
**Author:** ![Nightwatch\_Trailer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/9dc877/32.png) [@Nightwatch\_Trailer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nightwatch_Trailer)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2004, 4:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mamas-gonna-buy-you-a-a-game/247099/169 "2004-05-29T16:50:22Z")
Mama’s gonna make sure he gets scurvy. And if that scurvy doesn’t do him in… 300 posts! ---
**Author:** ![nocturnal\_tick](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/3d9bf3/32.png) [@nocturnal\_tick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nocturnal_tick)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2004, 5:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mamas-gonna-buy-you-a-a-game/247099/170 "2004-05-29T17:10:16Z")
_And if that scurvy doesn’t do him in…_ Momma’s gonna jab him with a drawing pin, And if the pin should make him pop… ---
**Author:** ![Cartooniverse](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cartooniverse/32/3084_2.png) [@Cartooniverse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cartooniverse)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2004, 5:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mamas-gonna-buy-you-a-a-game/247099/171 "2004-05-29T17:16:14Z")
Then he’ll liquify like a lollipop But when that doth make its jab… ---
**Author:** ![ZombiesAteMyBrain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/b4bc9f/32.png) [@ZombiesAteMyBrain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZombiesAteMyBrain)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2004, 5:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mamas-gonna-buy-you-a-a-game/247099/172 "2004-05-29T17:30:13Z")
> [@Cartooniverse](#): > > Then he’ll liquify like a lollipop > > But when that doth make its jab… You can feed what’s left to your pet crab. If your crab then wants more food Let him eat your mother while he’s in the mood. If you then get charged with murder ---
**Author:** ![Stage\_Manager](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/stage_manager/32/7267_2.png) [@Stage\_Manager](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stage_Manager)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2004, 6:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mamas-gonna-buy-you-a-a-game/247099/173 "2004-05-29T18:20:10Z")
_If you then get charged with murder_ Mama’s gonna find you a new sheep herder. And if that herder his sheep won’t diddle… ---
**Author:** ![ZombiesAteMyBrain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/b4bc9f/32.png) [@ZombiesAteMyBrain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZombiesAteMyBrain)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2004, 6:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mamas-gonna-buy-you-a-a-game/247099/174 "2004-05-29T18:33:40Z")
> [@Mikie](#): > > _If you then get charged with murder_ > > Mama’s gonna find you a new sheep herder but mama’s just been eaten by the crab - or did she rise again from the dead??? > [@](#): > > and if that herder his sheep won’t diddle… Find a pond, drop him in the middle. If he just can’t swim to shore ---
**Author:** ![Tikki](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/5daacb/32.png) [@Tikki](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tikki)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2004, 6:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mamas-gonna-buy-you-a-a-game/247099/175 "2004-05-29T18:51:08Z")
Then with the fishes he will snore And if those fishes should revolt ---
**Author:** ![ZombiesAteMyBrain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/b4bc9f/32.png) [@ZombiesAteMyBrain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZombiesAteMyBrain)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2004, 6:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mamas-gonna-buy-you-a-a-game/247099/176 "2004-05-29T18:57:51Z")
> [@Tikki](#): > > And if those fishes should revolt Stick them in a prison with a great big bolt. If you want to get away from it all ---
**Author:** ![Stage\_Manager](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/stage_manager/32/7267_2.png) [@Stage\_Manager](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stage_Manager)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2004, 7:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mamas-gonna-buy-you-a-a-game/247099/177 "2004-05-29T19:04:32Z")
_If you want to get away from it all_ Take Zombie Mama to the shopping mall but if that mall isn’t air-cinditioned… ---
**Author:** ![nocturnal\_tick](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/3d9bf3/32.png) [@nocturnal\_tick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nocturnal_tick)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2004, 7:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mamas-gonna-buy-you-a-a-game/247099/178 "2004-05-29T19:39:49Z")
_but if that mall isn’t air-cinditioned…_ Momma’ll go to Congress with a signed petition, And if that petition is ratified… (Is that right, I don’t know much about US politics) ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2004, 7:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mamas-gonna-buy-you-a-a-game/247099/179 "2004-05-29T19:44:46Z")
> [@nocturnal\_tick](#): > > _but if that mall isn’t air-cinditioned…_ > > Momma’ll go to Congress with a signed petition, > And if that petition is ratified… > > (Is that right, I don’t know much about US politics) Mama will be very gratified. And if this song turns into a very long Thread ---
**Author:** ![nocturnal\_tick](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/3d9bf3/32.png) [@nocturnal\_tick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nocturnal_tick)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2004, 7:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mamas-gonna-buy-you-a-a-game/247099/180 "2004-05-29T19:47:50Z")
_And if this song turns into a very long Thread_ Don’t tell [us](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=250465) or we’ll make it dead, And if we try to recreate… [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mamas-gonna-buy-you-a-a-game/247099.md?page=8) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mamas-gonna-buy-you-a-a-game/247099.md?page=10)