# Man Has Sex With Horse **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [November 28, 2006, 6:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/man-has-sex-with-horse/382099 "2006-11-28T18:21:39Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Chez\_Guevara](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/aeb1de/32.png) [@Chez\_Guevara](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chez_Guevara)\ **Post date:** [November 28, 2006, 6:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/man-has-sex-with-horse/382099/1 "2006-11-28T18:21:39Z")
[Link](http://news.aol.co.uk/man-had-sex-with-horse/article/20061128115609990011). > [@](#): > > Woollen, of Goatland Avenue, Longbenton, North Tyneside, admitted intercourse with an animal, theft and possession of cannabis and amphetamines. Wrong animal really. Also the wrong way round. The correct procedure is to mount the horse and pick up speed, not pick up speed and then mount the horse. ---
**Author:** ![CalMeacham](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/calmeacham/32/35_2.png) [@CalMeacham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CalMeacham)\ **Post date:** [November 28, 2006, 6:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/man-has-sex-with-horse/382099/2 "2006-11-28T18:34:01Z")
1.) The road company of \*\* Equus\*\* is getting into the roles too deeply or 2.) Molly, eh? Nothing queer about Johnson. ---
**Author:** ![Least\_Original\_User\_Name\_Ever](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e480ec/32.png) [@Least\_Original\_User\_Name\_Ever](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Least_Original_User_Name_Ever)\ **Post date:** [November 28, 2006, 6:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/man-has-sex-with-horse/382099/3 "2006-11-28T18:35:39Z")
You’re kidding me. The guy lived on GOATLAND avenue? Talk about destiny! (insert something about **Hal** ) ---
**Author:** ![Least\_Original\_User\_Name\_Ever](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e480ec/32.png) [@Least\_Original\_User\_Name\_Ever](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Least_Original_User_Name_Ever)\ **Post date:** [November 28, 2006, 6:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/man-has-sex-with-horse/382099/4 "2006-11-28T18:36:41Z")
…AND his last name was “Woollen”? Sometimes the jokes…they write themselves… ---
**Author:** ![Winston\_Smith](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/e95f7d/32.png) [@Winston\_Smith](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Winston_Smith)\ **Post date:** [November 28, 2006, 6:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/man-has-sex-with-horse/382099/5 "2006-11-28T18:38:19Z")
This lady gets my _Understatement of the Month Award_ for this gem… "There’s something wrong with him.’’ Huh. Ya think? 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Least\_Original\_User\_Name\_Ever](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e480ec/32.png) [@Least\_Original\_User\_Name\_Ever](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Least_Original_User_Name_Ever)\ **Post date:** [November 28, 2006, 6:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/man-has-sex-with-horse/382099/6 "2006-11-28T18:40:00Z")
The guy musta been tall…or he was carrying around a stool of some kind. I mean, how tall does a dude have to be to bang a horse? ---
**Author:** ![MEBuckner](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mebuckner/32/2896_2.png) [@MEBuckner](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MEBuckner)\ **Post date:** [November 28, 2006, 6:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/man-has-sex-with-horse/382099/7 "2006-11-28T18:41:09Z")
> [@](#): > > Woollen, of Goatland Avenue, Longbenton, North Tyneside, admitted intercourse with an animal, theft and possession of cannabis and amphetamines. This is your penis. This is your penis on drugs. Any questions? ---
**Author:** ![TheOnlySaneOne](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/67e7ee/32.png) [@TheOnlySaneOne](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TheOnlySaneOne)\ **Post date:** [November 28, 2006, 6:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/man-has-sex-with-horse/382099/8 "2006-11-28T18:41:59Z")
> [@](#): > > He was also seen riding Molly around her field in Wallsend, North Tyneside, without any trousers on. …_snicker_ ---
**Author:** ![Tully\_Mars](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/7ab992/32.png) [@Tully\_Mars](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tully_Mars)\ **Post date:** [November 28, 2006, 6:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/man-has-sex-with-horse/382099/9 "2006-11-28T18:44:39Z")
[QUOTE=Least Original User Name Ever] The guy musta been tall..or he was carrying around a stool of some kind. I mean, how tall does a dude have to be to bang a horse? [/QUOTE] You’re obviously not familiar with the phrase, “stump broke.” It means you have them trained to back up to a stump and stand still. A really well-trained one will whinny every now and then to make you thinks she’s enjoying it. Or, so I’ve heard. ---
**Author:** ![Jodi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/7feea3/32.png) [@Jodi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jodi)\ **Post date:** [November 28, 2006, 6:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/man-has-sex-with-horse/382099/10 "2006-11-28T18:55:43Z")
Something similar happened in Washington State last year and caused quite the kurfluffle. Except in WA the horse was the “top” and the man was the “bottom” and said man ended up dying of a perforated colon. See, he and his friend had sneaked into a neighbor’s barn for a little midnight horse canoodling (HorseLover) and videotaping of same (HorseVoyeur). But then things went so, so wrong, and HV ended up taking HL to the ER, where the whole story eventually came out after HL died. So then the police – y’know, the “po-po’s” – had to think about what to charge the survivor HV with. Cruelty to animals? The horse was fine, back at the barn, smoking a cig. Bestiality? Not a crime in WA. Burglary? That means going into someone else’s structure to commit a crime therein, and they couldn’t find a crime therein, so nope. At the end of the day, they charged him with trespassing, and he pled guilty. And for this very reason WA just passed a law criminalizing bestiality as a felony. ---
**Author:** ![Corner\_Case](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/corner_case/32/234_2.png) [@Corner\_Case](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Corner_Case)\ **Post date:** [November 28, 2006, 6:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/man-has-sex-with-horse/382099/11 "2006-11-28T18:57:16Z")
> [@Article](#): > > He asked for seven similar animal intercourse offences to be taken into consideration. Is he bucking for an award? > [@Article](#): > > …ordered to carry out 100 hours community work… I hope it’s not at the local vet clinic. ---
**Author:** ![Ponder\_Stibbons](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ponder_stibbons/32/343_2.png) [@Ponder\_Stibbons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ponder_Stibbons)\ **Post date:** [November 28, 2006, 6:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/man-has-sex-with-horse/382099/12 "2006-11-28T18:58:53Z")
So do you think that afterwards Woollen had serious night mares? ---
**Author:** ![motomoon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/a9adbd/32.png) [@motomoon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/motomoon)\ **Post date:** [November 28, 2006, 7:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/man-has-sex-with-horse/382099/13 "2006-11-28T19:03:47Z")
[QUOTE=Jodi] Something similar happened in Washington State last year and caused quite the kurfluffle. Except in WA the horse was the “top” and the man was the “bottom” and said man ended up dying of a perforated colon. See, he and his friend had sneaked into a neighbor’s barn for a little midnight horse canoodling (HorseLover) and videotaping of same (HorseVoyeur). But then things went so, so wrong, and HV ended up taking HL to the ER, where the whole story eventually came out after HL died. [/QUOTE] and if you’re really unfortunate you can stumble across the video on the internet. though, might i suggest eye and brain bleach afterwords. ---
**Author:** ![Jodi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/7feea3/32.png) [@Jodi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jodi)\ **Post date:** [November 28, 2006, 7:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/man-has-sex-with-horse/382099/14 "2006-11-28T19:07:21Z")
> [@](#): > > and if you’re really unfortunate you can stumble across the video on the internet. Heh. I’m just imagining how one could “unfortunately” “stumble” across such a video. [Grandma] I was googling for the Presbyterians’ recipe for tatertot hotdish and my stars! You would not believe what popped up! [/Grandma] 😉 ---
**Author:** ![lieu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c2a13f/32.png) [@lieu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lieu)\ **Post date:** [November 28, 2006, 7:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/man-has-sex-with-horse/382099/15 "2006-11-28T19:10:19Z")
Equus? Damn near sodomized us! ---
**Author:** ![bouv](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/bc8723/32.png) [@bouv](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bouv)\ **Post date:** [November 28, 2006, 9:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/man-has-sex-with-horse/382099/16 "2006-11-28T21:36:05Z")
[QUOTE=Jodi] Heh. I’m just imagining how one could “unfortunately” “stumble” across such a video. [Grandma] I was googling for the Presbyterians’ recipe for tatertot hotdish and my stars! You would not believe what popped up! [/Grandma] 😉 [/QUOTE] From speaking with my friends who have seen it (no, really, it wasn’t me,) it goes by the name “Mr.Hands” sometimes, so one wouldn’t have to be searching for “horse butt sex” to see it. ---
**Author:** ![TokyoBayer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tokyobayer/32/13989_2.png) [@TokyoBayer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TokyoBayer)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2006, 1:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/man-has-sex-with-horse/382099/17 "2006-11-29T01:38:27Z")
[QUOTE=Least Original User Name Ever] The guy musta been tall..or he was carrying around a stool of some kind. I mean, how tall does a dude have to be to bang a horse? [/QUOTE] “I rang the doorbell, didn’t I?” ---
**Author:** ![Beware\_of\_Doug](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/278dde/32.png) [@Beware\_of\_Doug](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beware_of_Doug)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2006, 1:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/man-has-sex-with-horse/382099/18 "2006-11-29T01:46:59Z")
[QUOTE=Jodi] Something similar happened in Washington State last year and caused quite the kurfluffle. [/QUOTE] I believe because someone else later made a film about it, no? Called _In the Forest There Is Every Kind of Perv_ or some such? ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2006, 1:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/man-has-sex-with-horse/382099/19 "2006-11-29T01:49:16Z")
Is it terribly, terribly wrong that there is a tiny little part of me that kinda wants to go look for that video? (I have learned my lesson about the internet, though - if it sounds like something that I’ll wish I hadn’t seen, it is.) ---
**Author:** ![Beware\_of\_Doug](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/278dde/32.png) [@Beware\_of\_Doug](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beware_of_Doug)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2006, 1:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/man-has-sex-with-horse/382099/20 "2006-11-29T01:51:39Z")
> [@Grandma](#): > > I was googling for the Presbyterians’ recipe for tatertot hotdish Eeew. Those Presbyterians obviously haven’t got the hang of hotdish. I think you need to google the Lutherans. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/man-has-sex-with-horse/382099.md?page=2)