# Man sticks live eel (and lemon) up his rectum in attempt to feel "intense sensation", succeeds spectacularly **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [August 24, 2024, 12:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/man-sticks-live-eel-and-lemon-up-his-rectum-in-attempt-to-feel-intense-sensation-succeeds-spectacularly/1006123 "2024-08-24T00:13:22Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 6
**Author:** ![EinsteinsHund](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/einsteinshund/32/8400_2.png) [@EinsteinsHund](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EinsteinsHund)\ **Post date:** [August 26, 2024, 1:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/man-sticks-live-eel-and-lemon-up-his-rectum-in-attempt-to-feel-intense-sensation-succeeds-spectacularly/1006123/101 "2024-08-26T13:51:13Z")
> [@StarvingButStrong](#): > > What happened to the eel??? They gave it to the local aquarium as the latest attraction: “The eel that escaped the human colon!” ---
**Author:** ![mbh](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/a6a055/32.png) [@mbh](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mbh)\ **Post date:** [August 26, 2024, 2:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/man-sticks-live-eel-and-lemon-up-his-rectum-in-attempt-to-feel-intense-sensation-succeeds-spectacularly/1006123/102 "2024-08-26T14:58:20Z")
He must have been a fan of Eddie Murphy > **[Eddie Murphy: Boogie In Your Butt (lyrics video)](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f27vG-Ja_0Y%2F)** > > music and lyrics for Eddie Murphy's "Boogie In Your Butt". ---
**Author:** ![Cervaise](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cervaise/32/16693_2.png) [@Cervaise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cervaise)\ **Post date:** [August 26, 2024, 3:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/man-sticks-live-eel-and-lemon-up-his-rectum-in-attempt-to-feel-intense-sensation-succeeds-spectacularly/1006123/103 "2024-08-26T15:10:08Z")
> [@LSLGuy](#): > > You just know those 3# 65cm long 20cm circumference gummi worms are seeing all sorts of illicit use. Sticking candy products in your whatsits and hoohas is just _asking_ for yeast infections. ---
**Author:** ![LSLGuy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lslguy/32/5813_2.png) [@LSLGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LSLGuy)\ **Post date:** [August 26, 2024, 3:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/man-sticks-live-eel-and-lemon-up-his-rectum-in-attempt-to-feel-intense-sensation-succeeds-spectacularly/1006123/104 "2024-08-26T15:27:45Z")
If you’re stuffing things the size of your forearm into your various orifi, I think infections are the least of your concerns. ---
**Author:** ![LSLGuy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lslguy/32/5813_2.png) [@LSLGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LSLGuy)\ **Post date:** [August 26, 2024, 3:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/man-sticks-live-eel-and-lemon-up-his-rectum-in-attempt-to-feel-intense-sensation-succeeds-spectacularly/1006123/105 "2024-08-26T15:30:54Z")
> [@Darren\_Garrison](#): > > And people who can’t get surgery probably just die. Imagine the indignity of a slow death by buttcarrot. Intestinal blockage is a bad way to go. ---
**Author:** ![Machine\_Elf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/82dd89/32.png) [@Machine\_Elf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Machine_Elf)\ **Post date:** [August 26, 2024, 3:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/man-sticks-live-eel-and-lemon-up-his-rectum-in-attempt-to-feel-intense-sensation-succeeds-spectacularly/1006123/106 "2024-08-26T15:42:53Z")
> [@LSLGuy](#): > > If you’re stuffing things the size of your forearm into your various orifi, I think infections are the least of your concerns. Judging from the pic of the extracted eel in the OP’s article and knowing its length was 65 cm, it surely must have been 10 cm in circumference, not 10 cm in diameter. ---
**Author:** ![LSLGuy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lslguy/32/5813_2.png) [@LSLGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LSLGuy)\ **Post date:** [August 26, 2024, 3:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/man-sticks-live-eel-and-lemon-up-his-rectum-in-attempt-to-feel-intense-sensation-succeeds-spectacularly/1006123/107 "2024-08-26T15:52:48Z")
Agreed. That was also clarified by another poster upthread from another cite where the article helpfully included that magic word “circumference”. My bad to assume diameter. 10cm circumference is, dare I say it, a much more rectally compatible cross-section. Shame about the teeth. ---
**Author:** ![susan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/susan/32/17537_2.png) [@susan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/susan)\ **Post date:** [August 26, 2024, 5:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/man-sticks-live-eel-and-lemon-up-his-rectum-in-attempt-to-feel-intense-sensation-succeeds-spectacularly/1006123/108 "2024-08-26T17:05:49Z")
> [@LSLGuy](#): > > Intestinal blockage is a bad way to go. So’s having a live eel gnaw its way out of your body. ---
**Author:** ![Darren\_Garrison](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/darren_garrison/32/92_2.png) [@Darren\_Garrison](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Darren_Garrison)\ **Post date:** [August 26, 2024, 5:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/man-sticks-live-eel-and-lemon-up-his-rectum-in-attempt-to-feel-intense-sensation-succeeds-spectacularly/1006123/109 "2024-08-26T17:10:47Z")
> [@susan](#): > > So’s having a live eel gnaw its way out of your body. “Tell me about it!” Says the heron. > **[Alien-like photo shows eel dangling out of heron's stomach in midair](https://www.livescience.com/snake-eel-bursts-out-of-heron.html)** > > It's possible the heron survived. The eel … likely not. ---
**Author:** ![mixdenny](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mixdenny/32/2962_2.png) [@mixdenny](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mixdenny)\ **Post date:** [August 26, 2024, 5:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/man-sticks-live-eel-and-lemon-up-his-rectum-in-attempt-to-feel-intense-sensation-succeeds-spectacularly/1006123/110 "2024-08-26T17:24:52Z")
Apropos to this thread… My wife has been binging on game shows lately so I have (sort of) seen more episodes of Family Feud then I ever wanted to. The more recent ones are considerably more risque then the older shows. Yesterday I witnessed this: Steve Harvey, “So what do you do”? Middle Aged Lady, “I’m a nurse. And I give the most painless rectal exam you will ever have”. Steve Harvey (eyes rolling), “There are no painless rectal exams”. Middle Aged Lady (looking suggestively), “There are when I give them”. Moving on to her husband after much laughter and open mouthed head shaking - Steve Harvey, “So what do you do, sir”? Husband, “I’m a proctologist”. ---
**Author:** ![Slithy\_Tove](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/slithy_tove/32/18248_2.png) [@Slithy\_Tove](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Slithy_Tove)\ **Post date:** [August 26, 2024, 6:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/man-sticks-live-eel-and-lemon-up-his-rectum-in-attempt-to-feel-intense-sensation-succeeds-spectacularly/1006123/111 "2024-08-26T18:13:52Z")
> [@susan](#): > > > [@LSLGuy](#): > > > > Intestinal blockage is a bad way to go. > > So’s having a live eel gnaw its way out of your body. “Okay Prometheus, you really crossed the line when you gave Man fire. But we’ll give you a choice: and eagle gnawing its way in, or an eel gnawing its way out.” ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [August 26, 2024, 6:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/man-sticks-live-eel-and-lemon-up-his-rectum-in-attempt-to-feel-intense-sensation-succeeds-spectacularly/1006123/112 "2024-08-26T18:31:50Z")
I have decided I do not like eels. Not one bit. ---
**Author:** ![Slithy\_Tove](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/slithy_tove/32/18248_2.png) [@Slithy\_Tove](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Slithy_Tove)\ **Post date:** [August 26, 2024, 6:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/man-sticks-live-eel-and-lemon-up-his-rectum-in-attempt-to-feel-intense-sensation-succeeds-spectacularly/1006123/113 "2024-08-26T18:43:48Z")
“A surfeit of red hot eels” would conflate Henry I with Edward II ---
**Author:** ![needscoffee](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/needscoffee/32/1076_2.png) [@needscoffee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/needscoffee)\ **Post date:** [August 26, 2024, 7:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/man-sticks-live-eel-and-lemon-up-his-rectum-in-attempt-to-feel-intense-sensation-succeeds-spectacularly/1006123/114 "2024-08-26T19:36:23Z")
I will never again eat unagi without thinking of this thread. ---
**Author:** ![susan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/susan/32/17537_2.png) [@susan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/susan)\ **Post date:** [August 26, 2024, 7:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/man-sticks-live-eel-and-lemon-up-his-rectum-in-attempt-to-feel-intense-sensation-succeeds-spectacularly/1006123/115 "2024-08-26T19:42:02Z")
Or watch [The Tin Drum](https://www.reddit.com/r/behindthebastards/comments/r0h529/todays_episode_reminded_me_of_the_infamous/). ---
**Author:** ![Procrustus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/procrustus/32/2994_2.png) [@Procrustus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Procrustus)\ **Post date:** [August 26, 2024, 7:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/man-sticks-live-eel-and-lemon-up-his-rectum-in-attempt-to-feel-intense-sensation-succeeds-spectacularly/1006123/116 "2024-08-26T19:43:11Z")
> [@needscoffee](#): > > I will never again eat unagi without thinking of this thread. I’m going to think twice about lemons too. ---
**Author:** ![Q.Q.Switcheroo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/q.q.switcheroo/32/5713_2.png) [@Q.Q.Switcheroo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Q.Q.Switcheroo)\ **Post date:** [August 26, 2024, 7:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/man-sticks-live-eel-and-lemon-up-his-rectum-in-attempt-to-feel-intense-sensation-succeeds-spectacularly/1006123/117 "2024-08-26T19:58:59Z")
I’m with Ogden Nash: > I don’t mind eels > Except as meals. > And the way they feels. ---
**Author:** ![Slithy\_Tove](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/slithy_tove/32/18248_2.png) [@Slithy\_Tove](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Slithy_Tove)\ **Post date:** [August 26, 2024, 8:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/man-sticks-live-eel-and-lemon-up-his-rectum-in-attempt-to-feel-intense-sensation-succeeds-spectacularly/1006123/118 "2024-08-26T20:19:55Z")
Given evangelist Ray Comfort’s argument that [bananas’ fitting in the human hand is proof of Intelligent Design,](https://rationalwiki.org/wiki/Banana_argument) what are we to make of eels, carrots, [Burpee’s Burpless Beauties,](https://www.burpee.com/cucumber-burpless-beauty-prod000685.html?queryID=2e01c16f6771732f3ca7e9b62b7281a1&objectID=500&indexName=burpee_production_default_products) etc? ---
**Author:** ![rocking\_chair](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rocking_chair/32/2918_2.png) [@rocking\_chair](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rocking_chair)\ **Post date:** [August 26, 2024, 10:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/man-sticks-live-eel-and-lemon-up-his-rectum-in-attempt-to-feel-intense-sensation-succeeds-spectacularly/1006123/119 "2024-08-26T22:35:58Z")
In my office we play the “traveling lemon”. > **[The Travelling Lemon](https://cabin-pressure.fandom.com/wiki/The_Travelling_Lemon)** > > The Travelling Lemon is a game introduced in Qikiqtarjuarq that Douglas enjoys playing, as does Herc. The objective of The Travelling Lemon is to hide a lemon in plain sight among the passengers on a flight, so that another player can... Waiting for my coworker to return from vacay so I can let him know about this. Rectum is not, repeat not, a legitimate hiding spot. ---
**Author:** ![Steven\_Maven](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/steven_maven/32/3272_2.png) [@Steven\_Maven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Steven_Maven)\ **Post date:** [August 27, 2024, 12:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/man-sticks-live-eel-and-lemon-up-his-rectum-in-attempt-to-feel-intense-sensation-succeeds-spectacularly/1006123/120 "2024-08-27T00:31:28Z")
> [@needscoffee](#): > > When I was a youngster, people had to use gerbils because they couldn’t afford eels. > > Those were simpler times… When ++I++ was a youngster we used 2 hard-boiled eggs & a piece of cheesecake. (Does ANYONE know that joke?) [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/man-sticks-live-eel-and-lemon-up-his-rectum-in-attempt-to-feel-intense-sensation-succeeds-spectacularly/1006123.md?page=5) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/man-sticks-live-eel-and-lemon-up-his-rectum-in-attempt-to-feel-intense-sensation-succeeds-spectacularly/1006123.md?page=7)