# Man sucks out girlfriend's eyeball... **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [December 20, 2007, 5:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/man-sucks-out-girlfriends-eyeball/430723 "2007-12-20T17:05:59Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Happy\_Lendervedder](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/happy_lendervedder/32/8488_2.png) [@Happy\_Lendervedder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Happy_Lendervedder)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2007, 5:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/man-sucks-out-girlfriends-eyeball/430723/1 "2007-12-20T17:05:59Z")
This headline on MSNBC has a link to a video that I can’t watch at work. [http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/21134540/vp/22343009#22343009](http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/21134540/vp/22343009#22343009) Can someone watch this and tell me that this isn’t for real, or I may just have to go home for the day and curl up in bed with fists over my eyes. ---
**Author:** ![Tupug\_Anachi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/7993a0/32.png) [@Tupug\_Anachi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tupug_Anachi)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2007, 5:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/man-sucks-out-girlfriends-eyeball/430723/2 "2007-12-20T17:10:36Z")
I watched it. :eek: Dude is on the streets! ---
**Author:** ![The\_Chao\_Goes\_Mu](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/the_chao_goes_mu/32/3191_2.png) [@The\_Chao\_Goes\_Mu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Chao_Goes_Mu)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2007, 5:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/man-sucks-out-girlfriends-eyeball/430723/3 "2007-12-20T17:12:37Z")
It’s for real. Sweet Jeebus. They didn’t show the vics face because she fears for her life. This A-hole is still on the streets. They showed a photo of the guy, hoping for leads. Go curl up in bed, that’s what I’m going to do. The world is doomed. ---
**Author:** ![Happy\_Lendervedder](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/happy_lendervedder/32/8488_2.png) [@Happy\_Lendervedder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Happy_Lendervedder)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2007, 5:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/man-sucks-out-girlfriends-eyeball/430723/4 "2007-12-20T17:31:58Z")
That sound you just heard was the sound of my respect for mankind deflating like a wet whoopie cushion. NOT-- I repeat, _NOT_– the sound of a man sucking a woman’s eyeball from her head. [sub]Oh gosh I want to vomit[/sub] ---
**Author:** ![Cluricaun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/bb73d2/32.png) [@Cluricaun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cluricaun)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2007, 5:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/man-sucks-out-girlfriends-eyeball/430723/5 "2007-12-20T17:58:31Z")
Wow, I can get pretty upset at times, but never once have I said “Don’t fuck with me or I’ll bite out your eyes!” although it does have a certain ring to it. ---
**Author:** ![Flander](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/8c91f0/32.png) [@Flander](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Flander)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2007, 7:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/man-sucks-out-girlfriends-eyeball/430723/6 "2007-12-20T19:31:09Z")
Oh yeah baby, suck on my vitreous humour! ---
**Author:** ![Beware\_of\_Doug](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/278dde/32.png) [@Beware\_of\_Doug](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beware_of_Doug)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2007, 7:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/man-sucks-out-girlfriends-eyeball/430723/7 "2007-12-20T19:42:15Z")
Here is an individual for whom “an eye for an eye” would be entirely appropriate. Maybe _both_ eyes. Someone out there must need a donor. ---
**Author:** ![Autolycus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/22d042/32.png) [@Autolycus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Autolycus)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2007, 12:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/man-sucks-out-girlfriends-eyeball/430723/8 "2007-12-21T00:18:17Z")
Did they really just say on that clip “Take a good look at the perpetrator, because the victim cant” ??? I didn’t know whether to laugh or cry. ---
**Author:** ![Mordwynd](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/9dc877/32.png) [@Mordwynd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mordwynd)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2007, 1:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/man-sucks-out-girlfriends-eyeball/430723/9 "2007-12-21T01:00:46Z")
Does it say Saraland and Alabama? If so, that’s near me, and I haven’t heard anything about this. Also, recently we had a man gouge his own eyes out and cut off his tongue. Crazy eyeball violence… ---
**Author:** ![jjimm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ba8739/32.png) [@jjimm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jjimm)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2007, 1:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/man-sucks-out-girlfriends-eyeball/430723/10 "2007-12-21T01:30:56Z")
[QUOTE=Autolycus] Did they really just say on that clip “Take a good look at the perpetrator, because the victim cant” ??? I didn’t know whether to laugh or cry. [/QUOTE] Yeah, she could, like, look out of her other eye. ---
**Author:** ![freckafree](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/freckafree/32/3050_2.png) [@freckafree](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/freckafree)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2007, 2:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/man-sucks-out-girlfriends-eyeball/430723/11 "2007-12-21T02:00:45Z")
[QUOTE=Autolycus] Did they really just say on that clip “Take a good look at the perpetrator, because the victim cant” ??? [/QUOTE] I’ll keep an eye out for him. ---
**Author:** ![ZebraShaSha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/eada6e/32.png) [@ZebraShaSha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZebraShaSha)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2007, 2:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/man-sucks-out-girlfriends-eyeball/430723/12 "2007-12-21T02:03:17Z")
[QUOTE=freckafree] I’ll keep an eye out for him. [/QUOTE] Put it on the porch, so he can take it without being spotted. ---
**Author:** ![freckafree](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/freckafree/32/3050_2.png) [@freckafree](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/freckafree)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2007, 3:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/man-sucks-out-girlfriends-eyeball/430723/13 "2007-12-21T03:31:25Z")
[QUOTE=ZebraShaSha] Put it on the porch, so he can take it without being spotted. [/QUOTE] Well, that would just suck! ---
**Author:** ![Argent\_Towers](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e8c25b/32.png) [@Argent\_Towers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Argent_Towers)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2007, 3:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/man-sucks-out-girlfriends-eyeball/430723/14 "2007-12-21T03:39:20Z")
There must be a mile-long line of guys waiting to skull-fuck her. I’ll be at the back, with James Ballard. ---
**Author:** ![ZebraShaSha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/eada6e/32.png) [@ZebraShaSha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZebraShaSha)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2007, 3:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/man-sucks-out-girlfriends-eyeball/430723/15 "2007-12-21T03:40:26Z")
[QUOTE=Argent Towers] There must be a mile-long line of guys waiting to skull-fuck her. I’ll be at the back, with James Ballard. [/QUOTE] As with most tragedies in life, one door closes and another leads you to a lucrative career in niche porn. ---
**Author:** ![Happy\_Lendervedder](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/happy_lendervedder/32/8488_2.png) [@Happy\_Lendervedder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Happy_Lendervedder)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2007, 2:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/man-sucks-out-girlfriends-eyeball/430723/16 "2007-12-21T14:33:24Z")
Iris you guys would stop with the bad jokes. Put a lid on it. We’re more eye-brow than this. Jeez, when you all take over a thread with bad jokes, you really socket to me. ---
**Author:** ![Zebra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/c0e974/32.png) [@Zebra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zebra)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2007, 2:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/man-sucks-out-girlfriends-eyeball/430723/17 "2007-12-21T14:36:27Z")
It was the chocolate flavored mascara your honor. ---
**Author:** ![Kuboydal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/ecb155/32.png) [@Kuboydal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kuboydal)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2007, 4:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/man-sucks-out-girlfriends-eyeball/430723/18 "2007-12-21T16:13:45Z")
[QUOTE=Happy Lendervedder] Iris you guys would stop with the bad jokes. Put a lid on it. We’re more eye-brow than this. Jeez, when you all take over a thread with bad jokes, you really socket to me. [/QUOTE] We are but pupils seated at the feet of the cornea master. ---
**Author:** ![Jackmannii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jackmannii/32/311_2.png) [@Jackmannii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jackmannii)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2007, 6:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/man-sucks-out-girlfriends-eyeball/430723/19 "2007-12-21T18:26:00Z")
The outpatients are out in force tonight, I see. _"When he found what he had done, He tore his eyes out one by one_ - [Tom Lehrer](http://www.sing365.com/music/lyric.nsf/Oedipus-Rex-lyrics-Tom-Lehrer/EC79BE5CC40829F348256A7D00251CC4) ---
**Author:** ![danceswithcats](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/9e8a1a/32.png) [@danceswithcats](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/danceswithcats)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2007, 7:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/man-sucks-out-girlfriends-eyeball/430723/20 "2007-12-21T19:32:21Z")
Although it was on his tongue, he certainly caught her eye. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/man-sucks-out-girlfriends-eyeball/430723.md?page=2)