# March Minirant Madness **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [March 1, 2011, 3:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/march-minirant-madness/573063 "2011-03-01T15:03:14Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 27
**Author:** ![Chimera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/8e8cbc/32.png) [@Chimera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chimera)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2011, 8:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/march-minirant-madness/573063/521 "2011-03-28T20:49:02Z")
We can get you in three weeks from next tuesday at 10:15am. Or within about three hours of that time realistically, but YOU had better damn well be here at 10:15am or we’ll cancel your appointment. ---
**Author:** ![jlzania](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/67e7ee/32.png) [@jlzania](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jlzania)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2011, 9:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/march-minirant-madness/573063/522 "2011-03-28T21:29:37Z")
> [@kaylasdad99](#): > > Damn you, Pepz Pizza! First you run out of your yummy yummy Alfredo sauce, so I can’t have that on my pizza instead of marinara. Then when I try to order it half-and-half style (vegetarian on one side; meat on the other) you try to charge for two extra toppings! > > Cancel the frickin’ pizza, I’ll do something else for dinner. > > But seriously, what kind of pizza place won’t let you order your pizza half-half without charging extra for it? > > P.S. You still beat the national chains hands down, but I’m mad about this! Almost the exact same thing happened to me last night at the local pizza joint. No, you idiot, half sausage and half pepperoni count as one ingredient not two. This has happened before-the crew that work there on Sunday nights are all kinds of stupid. I literally had to get a pen and piece of paper and do the addition in front of them to show them why they were wrong. ---
**Author:** ![LavenderBlue](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e95f7d/32.png) [@LavenderBlue](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LavenderBlue)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2011, 9:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/march-minirant-madness/573063/523 "2011-03-28T21:40:23Z")
> [@Chimera](#): > > We can get you in three weeks from next tuesday at 10:15am. > > Or within about three hours of that time realistically, but YOU had better damn well be here at 10:15am or we’ll cancel your appointment. The OB is even worse. I tell him I’m 36 weeks pregnant and the latest ultrasound was that the baby was over 6 lbs so hopefully all should be well because the odds are in my favor. I get this nice smile on my face and start to think about a healthy baby. He proceeeds to stand there reciting all that could still go wrong in the next three or four weeks. Then he tells me that my bp is too high. AAAAAAAAACCCCCCCCCCKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK!!! ---
**Author:** ![Shot\_From\_Guns](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ccd318/32.png) [@Shot\_From\_Guns](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shot_From_Guns)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2011, 4:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/march-minirant-madness/573063/524 "2011-03-29T16:56:58Z")
> [@Nava](#): > > That counts as Cruelty, it’s a sin under “you shall not kill”. Also as Courting Suicide, against the same, and (if your state has the death penalty), as Leading Others Into Temptation Which May Cause Their Death. Boy, your family sure is giving that commandment a whipping! Wait, what does? Having year-round fish fries? Impossible. Fish fries are delicious. ---
**Author:** ![Wile\_E](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c37758/32.png) [@Wile\_E](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wile_E)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2011, 5:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/march-minirant-madness/573063/525 "2011-03-29T17:57:29Z")
> [@Shot\_From\_Guns](#): > > … > > “Impordant” is proper. “Important” is also proper. “Irdorpent” is improper. But it’s nice to see that you passed up an opportunity to learn something and maybe examine how you inadvertantly help prop up racism and classism in exchange for insisting that you’re right even though almost every single linguist in the world would disagree with you. Fighting ignorance! > > … She pronounced it “impor-dent”, emphasis on the “dent” not “impordant”, as that would at least be close and not as annoying after hearing it over and over again. But I see you are a linguist. You have enlightened me greatly with your wisdom, Ignorance Fought! Now, please refer your vast cunning linguist knowledge [here](http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/important) scroll down to the pronunciation and note, they do not offer your alternate versions of proper pronunciation and therefore must be racist and classist and need you to fight their ignorance. Where does Miriam-Webster get off telling people what is proper pronunciation of words, anyway? Ignorant racist bastards. Ironically, I did not complain about people prononcing it “impor-ent” in my initial post because I knew some asshole would decide that must prove I’m a racist. Silly me, thinking it would be safe to rant about how a white chick in a slightly higher income class than I pronouncing a word in an irritating manner in a commercial I kept seeing on every single commercial break and it was getting on my nerves would not get me called such. Ya know, I think of the mini-rants thread as kind of a safe haven to come and rant about little or big annoyances. People may empathize or just ignore you, no pressure, you can just vent steam here. If I wanted to have my complaints turned against me and be called a racist/classist/idiot/ bleeding heart liberal etc. every time I post a rant then I’d just start a separate pit thread. ---
**Author:** ![Shot\_From\_Guns](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ccd318/32.png) [@Shot\_From\_Guns](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shot_From_Guns)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2011, 9:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/march-minirant-madness/573063/526 "2011-03-29T21:51:38Z")
> [@Wile\_E](#): > > Ya know, I think of the mini-rants thread as kind of a safe haven to come and rant about little or big annoyances. It’s a place to rant about things we find annoying. \*You \*find someone’s pronunciation of a word annoying; \*I \*find the fact that you consider various pronunciations “right” or “wrong” (i.e., an objective judgement, rather than a subjective one about what you, personally, prefer) to be annoying. It’s just as acceptable for me to bitch about you as it is for you to bitch about the woman on the commercial. If what I say bothers you, there’s nobody forcing you to respond. There’s also a handy ignore feature if you find everything I say equally worthless. ---
**Author:** ![Chimera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/8e8cbc/32.png) [@Chimera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chimera)\ **Post date:** [March 30, 2011, 1:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/march-minirant-madness/573063/527 "2011-03-30T01:45:34Z")
Due to the lack of sick time at work and my lack of any PTO this early in the year, I am not going to be paid for about 16 hours I missed on my last paycheck. I ate up most of my slim cash reserves going to the chiropractor and urgent care for my hip. Consequently, when I get paid on Friday, I will have pretty much exactly enough to pay my rent with $0 remaining. Fortunately I have some groceries and enough on a credit card to (probably) pay my gas for the next two weeks, but I will be living with only about $5 in change to my name for that whole period. Never mind that I’m still in a lot of pain and they told me to see a regular doctor if it hadn’t improve by this last weekend. That option is right out. Never mind too that the entire basis of it is stress, and this just adds a few buckets more. ---
**Author:** ![Wile\_E](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c37758/32.png) [@Wile\_E](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wile_E)\ **Post date:** [March 30, 2011, 1:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/march-minirant-madness/573063/528 "2011-03-30T01:47:32Z")
If you have every right to bitch about my bitching, then I have the right to bitch about your bitching about my bitching. Then you can bitch about my bitching about your bitching about my bitching until we just have an endless circle of bitching. Bitch. ---
**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\ **Post date:** [March 30, 2011, 1:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/march-minirant-madness/573063/529 "2011-03-30T01:52:15Z")
> [@Shot\_From\_Guns](#): > > It’s a place to rant about things we find annoying. \*You \*find someone’s pronunciation of a word annoying; \*I \*find the fact that you consider various pronunciations “right” or “wrong” (i.e., an objective judgement, rather than a subjective one about what you, personally, prefer) to be annoying. It’s just as acceptable for me to bitch about you as it is for you to bitch about the woman on the commercial. Yabbut, isn’t ranting about the contents of the minirants thread taking it into recursive territory? Be a shame to have the internet crawl up its own ass over this… ---
**Author:** ![curlcoat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ea5d25/32.png) [@curlcoat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/curlcoat)\ **Post date:** [March 30, 2011, 2:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/march-minirant-madness/573063/530 "2011-03-30T02:18:51Z")
> [@kaylasdad99](#): > > Be a shame to have the internet crawl up its own ass over this… I thought it had done that quite a while ago? 😕 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Darth\_Panda](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ee7513/32.png) [@Darth\_Panda](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Darth_Panda)\ **Post date:** [March 30, 2011, 2:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/march-minirant-madness/573063/531 "2011-03-30T02:26:43Z")
> [@Wile\_E](#): > > Ya know, I think of the mini-rants thread as kind of a safe haven to come and rant about little or big annoyances. I thought it was a place to bitch about midgets. ---
**Author:** ![anya\_marie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ebca7d/32.png) [@anya\_marie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/anya_marie)\ **Post date:** [March 30, 2011, 3:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/march-minirant-madness/573063/532 "2011-03-30T03:21:30Z")
Fuck colds. Fuck this mucus. Fuck coughing. Fuck tissues. Fuck cough drops. Fuck this sneezing my head off. Fuck cold medications. Fucking ow! Fuck my life. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [March 30, 2011, 3:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/march-minirant-madness/573063/533 "2011-03-30T03:25:38Z")
Fucking midgets. ---
**Author:** ![Wile\_E](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c37758/32.png) [@Wile\_E](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wile_E)\ **Post date:** [March 30, 2011, 3:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/march-minirant-madness/573063/534 "2011-03-30T03:38:02Z")
> [@Darth\_Panda](#): > > I thought it was a place to bitch about midgets. Who are you to decide what is proper human height? Your statement shows your ignorance and proves you to be a heightist! ---
**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\ **Post date:** [March 30, 2011, 8:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/march-minirant-madness/573063/535 "2011-03-30T08:33:25Z")
> [@Shot\_From\_Guns](#): > > Wait, what does? Having year-round fish fries? Impossible. Fish fries are delicious. No, forcing your own dietary preferences upon others when you know perfectly well they actively dislike the dishes being offered - extra malus points for expecting everybody to be jolly. ---
**Author:** ![MissTake](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/misstake/32/3189_2.png) [@MissTake](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MissTake)\ **Post date:** [March 30, 2011, 12:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/march-minirant-madness/573063/536 "2011-03-30T12:47:45Z")
Sis, I love you. I have no idea why you are deathly afraid of dentists. I do know I feel stupid treating you like you’re 5 versus your actual age of 50. You have nasty teeth. You need to get them taken care of. When Mom or I offer to go with you, don’t bitch at us. When I suggest you give the dentist a heads up about your issues, don’t respond that you’ll “handle” it by biting him. Suck it up, buttercup. Next, work on your husband go to see a dentist - his teeth are nasty, too. Daughter, I’m glad you’re having a good time in NYC. Really. You do not need to text me constantly. If I miss a text, you do not need to call my cell, then the home phone. I will get to it, for fucks sake. I do not like being tethered to my cell phone, you know that. That I dug it out of the bottom of my purse and actually charged it was a big step for me. ---
**Author:** ![Shot\_From\_Guns](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ccd318/32.png) [@Shot\_From\_Guns](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shot_From_Guns)\ **Post date:** [March 30, 2011, 2:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/march-minirant-madness/573063/537 "2011-03-30T14:24:49Z")
> [@Wile\_E](#): > > If you have every right to bitch about my bitching, then I have the right to bitch about your bitching about my bitching. Then you can bitch about my bitching about your bitching about my bitching until we just have an endless circle of bitching. > Bitch. Bitchin’. > [@Darth\_Panda](#): > > I thought it was a place to bitch about midgets. Or rally cars. > [@Nava](#): > > No, forcing your own dietary preferences upon others when you know perfectly well they actively dislike the dishes being offered - extra malus points for expecting everybody to be jolly. Welcome to my family! I think my mom was just genuinely oblivious about the fact that bro and sis-in-law don’t like fish, though. Not that that’s much better. Can’t remember if I mentioned, but we’re now going to some (presumably shitty) Italian place instead. Again, to accommodate the grandparents. Better than a fish fry where the birthday kids have to try to find something else on the menu, though. > [@MissTake](#): > > Daughter, I’m glad you’re having a good time in NYC. Really. You do not need to text me constantly. If I miss a text, you do not need to call my cell, then the home phone. I will get to it, for fucks sake. I do not like being tethered to my cell phone, you know that. That I dug it out of the bottom of my purse and actually charged it was a big step for me. Maybe we should swap. Your daughter and my mom could be obsessive contact-attempters together, and you and I could be mellow and fall off the face of the earth when we want to. ---
**Author:** ![Scuba\_Ben](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/278dde/32.png) [@Scuba\_Ben](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scuba_Ben)\ **Post date:** [March 30, 2011, 3:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/march-minirant-madness/573063/538 "2011-03-30T15:18:20Z")
> [@Wile\_E](#): > > If you have every right to bitch about my bitching, then I have the right to bitch about your bitching about my bitching. Then you can bitch about my bitching about your bitching about my bitching until we just have an endless circle of bitching. > Bitch. I find something mildly amusing about a female poster named after a coyote making excessive use of the term for a female coyote. ---
**Author:** ![purplehorseshoe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/purplehorseshoe/32/2996_2.png) [@purplehorseshoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/purplehorseshoe)\ **Post date:** [March 30, 2011, 3:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/march-minirant-madness/573063/539 "2011-03-30T15:40:09Z")
We’re out of water (again). Background: we have one of those old-school water dispensers with the big blue plastic container on top, that burbles when you draw some water. (See also: opening credits of “The Office.”) For some reason, the delivery schedule does not line up with how fast we drink to stay hydrated no matter what our office manager does. Anyway, Co-Worker bellies up to the dispenser, coffee mug in hand, taps the empty bottle, makes a sad face. I pass her on my way to the break room kitchen: Co-Worker: Awww. We’re out of water. ☹ Me: Tap water it is, then! 🙂 Co-Worker: (follows me into the kitchen, starts running the tap) I can never get it hot enough out of the sink … ☹ Me: (Looks at her, looks at the sink, looks at _the microwave directly in front of her_…) :rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![Jackmannii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jackmannii/32/311_2.png) [@Jackmannii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jackmannii)\ **Post date:** [March 30, 2011, 3:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/march-minirant-madness/573063/540 "2011-03-30T15:56:53Z")
My office phone’s message light is on, so I go play back the recording and hear: 1. About ten seconds of some kind of mammalian breathing, followed by noises suggestive of drawers opening and closing and vague panting sounds. 2. Distant rattling and rustling noises. 3. 15 seconds of rhythmic banging, like a defective industrial press. 4. More distant crumpling and rattling noises. 5. 10 seconds of dead silence. Then the recording comes back on. “To respond to this message, press 1”. Let’s see, how to respond. I figure about a minute of heavy breathing, growing faster and faster, followed by large fragile objects being knocked over, agonized screams and then sudden silence. :eek:😕:eek: [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/march-minirant-madness/573063.md?page=26) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/march-minirant-madness/573063.md?page=28)