# Mark Wahlberg on 9/11 Plane: I Would Have Beat Terrorists, Landed It Safely **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [January 18, 2012, 9:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mark-wahlberg-on-9-11-plane-i-would-have-beat-terrorists-landed-it-safely/609939 "2012-01-18T21:19:31Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![VinylTurnip](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b2d939/32.png) [@VinylTurnip](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VinylTurnip)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2012, 4:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mark-wahlberg-on-9-11-plane-i-would-have-beat-terrorists-landed-it-safely/609939/61 "2012-01-19T16:17:11Z")
Mark Wahlberg was asked to wear a prosthetic cock in _Boogie Nights_ because P. T. Anderson wanted “something within reason.” ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2012, 4:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mark-wahlberg-on-9-11-plane-i-would-have-beat-terrorists-landed-it-safely/609939/62 "2012-01-19T16:36:47Z")
> [@Dewey\_Finn](#): > > I wonder if he himself really realizes how much of a mistake these comments are. I think there’s very little chance he acquired self-awareness in the last couple of days. ---
**Author:** ![cmyk](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cmyk/32/3353_2.png) [@cmyk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cmyk)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2012, 5:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mark-wahlberg-on-9-11-plane-i-would-have-beat-terrorists-landed-it-safely/609939/63 "2012-01-19T17:06:47Z")
**Mark Wahlberg** could reverse time by pumping impossible amounts of testosterone from his testicles into his pectoral muscles, and save the 9/11 tragedy, before it ever happened. But now that he’s gotten over the guilt of not boarding and saving Flight 11, he’s ok with just letting it go. ---
**Author:** ![Eve](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Eve](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eve)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2012, 5:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mark-wahlberg-on-9-11-plane-i-would-have-beat-terrorists-landed-it-safely/609939/64 "2012-01-19T17:08:12Z")
Well, you know, if Doris Day, Karen Black and Laverne DiFazio can land a plane, I fail to see why Marky Mark can’t, too. ---
**Author:** ![Aji\_de\_Gallina](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aji_de_gallina/32/260_2.png) [@Aji\_de\_Gallina](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Aji_de_Gallina)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2012, 5:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mark-wahlberg-on-9-11-plane-i-would-have-beat-terrorists-landed-it-safely/609939/65 "2012-01-19T17:10:27Z")
> [@Dewey\_Finn](#): > > That apology looks like something written by his manager or agent. I wonder if he himself really realizes how much of a mistake these comments are. I don’t accept the apologies. He didn’t just have a slip-of-the-tongue out-of-context comment, he said it with clear intent. I he is so brave as to fight terrorists in a flying airplane, he should be able to say “ **fuck all of you, I said it and I’ll say it again, bitches**!!!” ---
**Author:** ![Robot\_Arm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/robot_arm/32/18280_2.png) [@Robot\_Arm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Robot_Arm)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2012, 5:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mark-wahlberg-on-9-11-plane-i-would-have-beat-terrorists-landed-it-safely/609939/66 "2012-01-19T17:54:36Z")
> [@Eve](#): > > Well, you know, if Doris Day, Karen Black and Laverne DiFazio can land a plane, I fail to see why Marky Mark can’t, too. Loathe as I am to correct our oracle of all things cinematic, Karen Black didn’t land the plane. She did keep it from crashing until Charlton Heston showed up and squinted hard enough to force the plane onto the ground. ---
**Author:** ![Scumpup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ce73a5/32.png) [@Scumpup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scumpup)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2012, 6:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mark-wahlberg-on-9-11-plane-i-would-have-beat-terrorists-landed-it-safely/609939/67 "2012-01-19T18:07:12Z")
Doris Day is only 14.009% testicles. ---
**Author:** ![Eve](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Eve](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eve)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2012, 6:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mark-wahlberg-on-9-11-plane-i-would-have-beat-terrorists-landed-it-safely/609939/68 "2012-01-19T18:10:05Z")
> [@Robot\_Arm](#): > > Loathe as I am to correct our oracle of all things cinematic, Karen Black didn’t land the plane. She did keep it from crashing until Charlton Heston showed up and squinted hard enough to force the plane onto the ground. Sadly, Karen Black did not know how to inflate the Automatic Pilot. ---
**Author:** ![lieu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c2a13f/32.png) [@lieu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lieu)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2012, 6:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mark-wahlberg-on-9-11-plane-i-would-have-beat-terrorists-landed-it-safely/609939/69 "2012-01-19T18:11:04Z")
Doris, Morris, Otis… I never can keep that family straight. ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2012, 6:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mark-wahlberg-on-9-11-plane-i-would-have-beat-terrorists-landed-it-safely/609939/70 "2012-01-19T18:11:33Z")
> [@Eve](#): > > Well, you know, if Doris Day, Karen Black and Laverne DiFazio can land a plane, I fail to see why Marky Mark can’t, too. Heck, if Dean Martin can fly a plane, then anyone must be able to. ---
**Author:** ![ministryman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f6c823/32.png) [@ministryman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ministryman)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2012, 6:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mark-wahlberg-on-9-11-plane-i-would-have-beat-terrorists-landed-it-safely/609939/71 "2012-01-19T18:27:21Z")
> [@the lone cashew](#): > > **Mark Wahlberg** is walking down an alley when 2 tough guys ask **Mark Wahlberg** for his wallet. What does **Mark Wahlberg** do? > > **Mark Wahlberg** gives them his wallet. And then he goes on record talking about how he COULD have kicked their asses, but he is leading a pure life, and didn’t want trouble. ---
**Author:** ![Dallas\_Jones](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dallas_jones/32/3277_2.png) [@Dallas\_Jones](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dallas_Jones)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2012, 7:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mark-wahlberg-on-9-11-plane-i-would-have-beat-terrorists-landed-it-safely/609939/72 "2012-01-19T19:24:53Z")
> [@](#): > > Feh– **Mark Wahlberg** makes Chuck Norris look like Truman Capote! \*\*Mark Wahlberg \*\*could not pour piss out of Chuck Norris’ boot even if the instructions were written on the heel! 😉 But seriously, before 911 the way to survive a hijacking was to stay quiet and let the bad guys state their demands to the authorities. They want money or they want political prisoners freed, or the have other demands. Time spent negotiating usually wore them down until at least most of the hostages get released safely. 911 changed that thinking. Only the passengers on Flight 93 had the time to realize that this was a new ball game. The hijackers were using the actual aircraft as a missile and they had no hope of negotiations succeeding. The passengers on the first 3 planes were following the most survivable strategy known, at the time. Marky Mark was just being a poor Monday morning quarterback. The problem is that when you are famous, stupid shit you say goes viral really fast and you look and sound like an idiot. Which in this case appears to be the correct diagnosis. ---
**Author:** ![Spice\_Weasel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spice_weasel/32/5435_2.png) [@Spice\_Weasel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spice_Weasel)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2012, 7:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mark-wahlberg-on-9-11-plane-i-would-have-beat-terrorists-landed-it-safely/609939/73 "2012-01-19T19:26:57Z")
Man, when I heard he said something controversial about 9/11, I assumed it would be some anti-Muslim thing. I think what he said was stupid, but not offensive. It’s a shame to hear about all his past issues too. I loved him in I Heart Huckabees. ---
**Author:** ![Crown\_Prince\_of\_Irony](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ed655f/32.png) [@Crown\_Prince\_of\_Irony](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crown_Prince_of_Irony)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2012, 7:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mark-wahlberg-on-9-11-plane-i-would-have-beat-terrorists-landed-it-safely/609939/74 "2012-01-19T19:34:01Z")
**Marky Mark** can kill a man 37 different ways using nothing but a pair of Calvin Klein briefs. But he still couldn’t make _The Happening_ any better. ---
**Author:** ![Irishman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/b487fb/32.png) [@Irishman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Irishman)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2012, 7:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mark-wahlberg-on-9-11-plane-i-would-have-beat-terrorists-landed-it-safely/609939/75 "2012-01-19T19:42:13Z")
> [@brickbacon](#): > > He doesn’t seem to have any remorse for his actions, nor has he suffered any negative repercussions. To quote the wiki article: What makes you say that? Even in the quote you provided, he said > [@](#): > > Wahlberg has stated: “I did a lot of things that I regretted and I have certainly paid for my mistakes.” What you didn’t quote: > [@](#): > > According to Wahlberg, “As soon as I began that life of crime, there was always a voice in my head telling me I was going to end up in jail. Three of my brothers had done time. My sister went to prison so many times I lost count. Finally I was there, locked up with the kind of guys I’d always wanted to be like. Now I’d earned my stripes and I was just like them and I realized it wasn’t what I wanted at all. I’d ended up in the worst place I could possibly imagine and I never wanted to go back. First of all I had to learn to stay on the straight and narrow.” Wahlberg first relied on the guidance of his [parish priest](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Parish_priest) to turn his back on crime. He told his [street gang](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Street_gang) that he was leaving them and had “some serious fights” with them over it. The actor commented in 2009: “I’ve made a lot of mistakes in my life and I’ve done bad things. But I never blamed my upbringing for that. I never behaved like a victim so that I would have a convenient reason for victimizing others. Everything I did wrong was my own fault. I was taught the difference between right and wrong at an early age. I take full responsibility.”[[15]](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mark_Wahlberg#cite_note-14) > **[Mark Wahlberg](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mark_Wahlberg)** > > Mark Robert Michael Wahlberg (born June 5, 1971), formerly known by his stage name Marky Mark, is an American actor, producer, and former rapper. His work as a leading man spans the comedy, drama, and action genres. He has received multiple accolades, including a BAFTA Award, and nominations for two Academy Awards, three Golden Globe Awards, and nine Primetime Emmy Awards. > Wahlberg was born in Boston. As a youth, he took part in a number of violent and racially motivated attacks, resulting i... There’s certainly some level of remorse there. Maybe he didn’t give full restitution for past bad acts, and he acknowledges that, but that’s different from feeling no remorse. Seems to me Wahlberg is guilty of running his mouth without engaging his brain. And sure, getting into fights at a football game is pretty assholish, but no more so than the rest of the assholes getting into a fight at a football game. > [@Chicagojeff](#): > > I’m thinking that since this isn’t the first time he’s made comments on this issue that he has some sort of issues he needs to work thru with someone who specializes in that shit.. Probably. > [@SciFiSam](#): > > Not impossible, but with a high likelihood of failure. Hell, even that Mythbusters episode only had the ‘passenger’ succeeding on the second try, and in a real scenario you wouldn’t get a do-over. Their first try in the simulator was without any help. Their second try was with the flight controller directing them. IIRC Adam failed both times, but came a lot closer the second time. Jamie succeeded the second time. Mostly because Jamie is a lot more controlled and focused than Adam. ---
**Author:** ![brickbacon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/898d66/32.png) [@brickbacon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/brickbacon)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2012, 7:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mark-wahlberg-on-9-11-plane-i-would-have-beat-terrorists-landed-it-safely/609939/76 "2012-01-19T19:44:14Z")
Who knew Damon Lindelof was so [funny](https://twitter.com/#!/DamonLindelof/status/159811074630234112)? ---
**Author:** ![Kobal2](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kobal2/32/20_2.png) [@Kobal2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kobal2)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2012, 7:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mark-wahlberg-on-9-11-plane-i-would-have-beat-terrorists-landed-it-safely/609939/77 "2012-01-19T19:52:13Z")
> [@Irishman](#): > > Their first try in the simulator was without any help. Their second try was with the flight controller directing them. IIRC Adam failed both times, but came a lot closer the second time. Jamie succeeded the second time. Mostly because Jamie is a lot more controlled and focused than Adam. Still too much experience for a meaningful experiment - should have used Jamie, Grant & Kary for the second try. “What you remember doing wot failed utterly” is still more experience that a scrub in the cockpit would have, yes ? I still really ache to try it firsthand. Anybody have a line with some well-to-do airline who wouldn’t mind lending the odd 747 for Science! ? ---
**Author:** ![UncleRojelio](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/unclerojelio/32/3160_2.png) [@UncleRojelio](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UncleRojelio)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2012, 8:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mark-wahlberg-on-9-11-plane-i-would-have-beat-terrorists-landed-it-safely/609939/78 "2012-01-19T20:28:46Z")
> [@Alessan](#): > > If [this guy](http://articles.nydailynews.com/2004-07-24/news/18270804_1_hijacking-delta-force-daniel-lewin) couldn’t stop them, I’m pretty sure Marky Mark couldn’t, either. Who survived to tell that story? ---
**Author:** ![VinylTurnip](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b2d939/32.png) [@VinylTurnip](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VinylTurnip)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2012, 8:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mark-wahlberg-on-9-11-plane-i-would-have-beat-terrorists-landed-it-safely/609939/79 "2012-01-19T20:29:08Z")
“Hey, donkey. What’s goin’ on? You’re a donkey, I like that. You eat apples, right? I produce _Entourage_. Okay, talk to you later, donkey. Now I’m gonna talk to a chicken!” ---
**Author:** ![SciFiSam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/47e85d/32.png) [@SciFiSam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SciFiSam)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2012, 8:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mark-wahlberg-on-9-11-plane-i-would-have-beat-terrorists-landed-it-safely/609939/80 "2012-01-19T20:56:02Z")
> [@Irishman](#): > > Their first try in the simulator was without any help. Their second try was with the flight controller directing them. IIRC Adam failed both times, but came a lot closer the second time. Jamie succeeded the second time. Mostly because Jamie is a lot more controlled and focused than Adam. By flight controller, do you mean air traffic controller or pilot or something else? Because an air traffic controller is not a pilot, and that’s the person you’d be talking to from the cockpit. It really doesn’t sound like much of an experiment, but even in those extremely easy conditions a 50% failure rate the second time of trying is really not evidence that anyone can safely land a plane. It’s pretty good evidence of the opposite. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mark-wahlberg-on-9-11-plane-i-would-have-beat-terrorists-landed-it-safely/609939.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mark-wahlberg-on-9-11-plane-i-would-have-beat-terrorists-landed-it-safely/609939.md?page=5)