# Married Men. Are You Still Getting Blow Jobs? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [May 4, 2009, 4:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/married-men-are-you-still-getting-blow-jobs/495254 "2009-05-04T04:42:50Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 6
**Author:** ![hroark2112](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/6a8cbe/32.png) [@hroark2112](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hroark2112)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2009, 8:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/married-men-are-you-still-getting-blow-jobs/495254/101 "2009-05-06T20:39:32Z")
As far as her swallowing, I personally don’t care if she spits, swallows, or dribbles it down the front of her blue dress, as long as she has to make a choice!! 😃 Seriously though, most women don’t get me to that point, it takes me too long. I don’t mind, it just means that we’re going to switch to other things to get me there, and that makes me happy happy!! I’ve been with a number of women who squirted, and I never had a problem being “down there” when the water-works started. I do keep a waterproof mattress liner on my bed, in case that does happen. Just change the sheets before going to sleep (or work!!) and toss the wet ones in the washing machine. ---
**Author:** ![Razncain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/9d8465/32.png) [@Razncain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Razncain)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2009, 8:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/married-men-are-you-still-getting-blow-jobs/495254/102 "2009-05-06T20:59:43Z")
> [@filling\_pages](#): > > Like, oh, pretty much everything else involved in sex, porn does not necessarily reflect real life. The women I have been with who ejaculated didn’t pump out quarts and quarts of the stuff. And, like someone said, your mouth is generally on the clit when it happens, not over the urethra, so it mostly just sprays on your chin and chest. No, the main problem is figuring out how to deal with the large wet spot/puddle left afterward. There is a great deal of mystery and dispute as to what is going on with a very small percentage of women who ejaculate that much. Some think it still is urine, and it may very well be, while others that I remember reading from claiming to have tested it, said it was something else, and only had small traces of it urine in it. Wikipedia says _the exact source and nature of the fluid continues to be the topic of debate among medical professionals._ > **[Female ejaculation](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Female_ejaculation)** > > Female ejaculation is characterized as an expulsion of fluid from the Skene's gland at the lower end of the urethra during or before an orgasm. It is also known colloquially as squirting or gushing, although research indicates that female ejaculation and squirting are different phenomena, squirting being attributed to a sudden expulsion of liquid that partly comes from the bladder and contains urine. > Female ejaculation is physiologically distinct from coital incontinence, with which it is som... I don’t think these particular videos are fake, and if you want to PM me, I’ll direct you to a free site, and you estimate how much fluid you think has came out. It looks to be more than a pint, and wouldn’t surprise me if over a period of three or four orgasmic episodes happening of the same woman that it could reach a quart. I don’t know about quarts. According to wiki: > [@](#): > > In the United Kingdom, the British Board of Film Classification has banned films alleged to show female ejaculation, claiming that the expert medical advice they received informed them that there is no such thing as female ejaculation, and therefore it was deemed to show urine. [89][90] They later stated instead that they do not take any view on whether female ejaculation exists, only claiming that all examples they have seen thus far during classification have been urination during sex. Cecil, you up for some field research? What is the Straight Dope? ---
**Author:** ![filling\_pages](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/b9bd4f/32.png) [@filling\_pages](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/filling_pages)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2009, 9:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/married-men-are-you-still-getting-blow-jobs/495254/103 "2009-05-06T21:10:53Z")
> [@razncain](#): > > There is a great deal of mystery and dispute as to what is going on with a very small percentage of women who ejaculate that much. Some think it still is urine, and it may very well be, while others that I remember reading from claiming to have tested it, said it was something else, and only had small traces of it urine in it. Then I suggest they get up close and personal with it. It smells nothing like urine - more like plain Pedialyte, honestly. I haven’t tasted any piss, that I am aware of, so I can’t say for any comparisons there, but it sure doesn’t taste like piss smells. And it can certainly be quite a bit of fluid, in comparison to the sex output of non-ejaculating women, but porn is notorious for upping the quantity of ejaculate through various means, both for women and men. I’m at work, or I’d search for some discussion on the ways and means. ---
**Author:** ![Razncain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/9d8465/32.png) [@Razncain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Razncain)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2009, 9:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/married-men-are-you-still-getting-blow-jobs/495254/104 "2009-05-06T21:29:46Z")
> [@filling\_pages](#): > > Then I suggest they get up close and personal with it. It smells nothing like urine - more like plain Pedialyte, honestly. I haven’t tasted any piss, that I am aware of, so I can’t say for any comparisons there, but it sure doesn’t taste like piss smells. > > And it can certainly be quite a bit of fluid, in comparison to the sex output of non-ejaculating women, but porn is notorious for upping the quantity of ejaculate through various means, both for women and men. I’m at work, or I’d search for some discussion on the ways and means. It isn’t just porn sites that are showing this kind of volume. I found a Sue Johanson who does a “sex talk” show in Canada that says for these women, “pint” is the norm. I don’t know what her credentials are, but doing a bit more googling on this, and plenty seem to go with at least that figure. From other boards I’ve briefly looked at, many swear it isn’t urine either, from the women that have them, to the guys that have witnessed it. But again, you’ve got others that still claim it is urine. Cecil really needs to get going on this for inquiring minds that want to know. If I don’t give a link, but just mention the free site that shows this, will SD allow that? ---
**Author:** ![Cubsfan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f4b2a3/32.png) [@Cubsfan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cubsfan)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2009, 10:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/married-men-are-you-still-getting-blow-jobs/495254/105 "2009-05-06T22:14:02Z")
> [@filling\_pages](#): > > Like, oh, pretty much everything else involved in sex, porn does not necessarily reflect real life. The women I have been with who ejaculated didn’t pump out quarts and quarts of the stuff. And, like someone said, your mouth is generally on the clit when it happens, not over the urethra, so it mostly just sprays on your chin and chest. No, the main problem is figuring out how to deal with the large wet spot/puddle left afterward. I can confirm that it is very real and happens with avg joe folks. My exwife was a squirter and I would say that when she squirted it looked like she was pissing. I mean 5-10 second constant stream, which doesn’t sound long but watch a clock and count it out. It was definitely not piss. If I happened to be down there it truly felt like I was getting a golden shower. I didn’t care for it. ETA: By didn’t care for it I mean it didn’t do anything for me. It didn’t gross me out or anything. ---
**Author:** ![Voyager](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/voyager/32/133_2.png) [@Voyager](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Voyager)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2009, 6:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/married-men-are-you-still-getting-blow-jobs/495254/106 "2009-05-07T06:45:08Z")
> [@Stoid](#): > > I’m not there, can’t be sure, but it would seem the saddest possible state of affairs to be in a marriage where your partner, after decades, just “didn’t know” you liked oral sex, whether it was because you completely failed to convey your feelings about it, or your partner completely failed to comprehend your expression. I wasn’t talking about big stuff. I agree with you there. I meant more “tonight it would be really cool if you …” If you never do that, you never get to the big stuff. ---
**Author:** ![Cyn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a88e4f/32.png) [@Cyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cyn)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2009, 2:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/married-men-are-you-still-getting-blow-jobs/495254/107 "2009-05-07T14:47:35Z")
> [@razncain](#): > > I can’t imagine such an animal existing. Could you tell us if he had conservative religious views? If not, why do you suppose that was? My first husband had no strong religious views. I believe he thought his giving me oral sex was “dirty”; that his mouth was in an “unclean” place. I bathed carefully (but didn’t think to shave) and after a few of his attempts, complete with gagging noises, it never happened again. He said bjs weren’t exciting to him, that the thought wasn’t something arousing and as foreplay, it was a waste of time. Many years later, his sister told me a story about one of her teen aged girlfriends"playing" with her 6 year old brother and how they laughed at his reaction. He says he doesn’t remember the incident but remembers how he hated his sister’s friends. ---
**Author:** ![Maastricht](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/a88e57/32.png) [@Maastricht](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Maastricht)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2009, 5:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/married-men-are-you-still-getting-blow-jobs/495254/108 "2009-05-07T17:27:24Z")
> [@razncain](#): > > Cecil, you up for some field research? What is the Straight Dope? [The Master](http://www.straightdope.com/columns/read/2420/whats-in-female-ejaculate) [Speaks](http://www.straightdope.com/columns/read/59/whats-the-deal-with-the-grafenberg-spot). ---
**Author:** ![Stoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/stoid/32/272_2.png) [@Stoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stoid)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2009, 6:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/married-men-are-you-still-getting-blow-jobs/495254/109 "2009-05-07T18:57:24Z")
One thing that occurs to me in reading Unca CeCe is is that males and females both begin structurally female, and my understanding is that all the “boy” parts are fashioned from girl parts. Which is why, for instance, males have tits. We all have the same baseline, and men get rejiggered a bit. So…the prostate comes from what? Testicles are ovaries. Penises are clitoris’ (os it is es?). Girls have things that boys don’t have at all, but that’s easy to do; males just never develop a uterus. But how can a male possible have something completely unrelated to anything in a female body? That doesn’t seem to make sense. Oh…[hijack] ---
**Author:** ![Razncain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/9d8465/32.png) [@Razncain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Razncain)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2009, 7:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/married-men-are-you-still-getting-blow-jobs/495254/110 "2009-05-07T19:29:42Z")
> [@Cyn](#): > > My first husband had no strong religious views. I believe he thought his giving me oral sex was “dirty”; that his mouth was in an “unclean” place. I bathed carefully (but didn’t think to shave) and after a few of his attempts, complete with gagging noises, it never happened again. He said bjs weren’t exciting to him, that the thought wasn’t something arousing and as foreplay, it was a waste of time. I see. Well, I’ve known quite a few guys that won’t do this for their woman, but never heard of a guy that didn’t like receiving oral from her. I do prefer her to shave at least some parts, but it doesn’t have to be all of it. I seen a local show a while back where they were asking doctors about oral sex. One man preferred more bj’s from his wife too, but she didn’t give them to him regularly. The doctors suggested him doing a little trim work down there as well. Hearing the feedback from his wife, as well as other women, this seems to make a big difference to quite a few. ---
**Author:** ![Razncain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/9d8465/32.png) [@Razncain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Razncain)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2009, 7:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/married-men-are-you-still-getting-blow-jobs/495254/111 "2009-05-07T19:31:20Z")
> [@Maastricht](#): > > [The Master](http://www.straightdope.com/columns/read/2420/whats-in-female-ejaculate) [Speaks](http://www.straightdope.com/columns/read/59/whats-the-deal-with-the-grafenberg-spot). Thanks, I tried a search engine here, but I seem to always have trouble with it. And it looks like the verdict is still out. I wish Cecil would have commented on the volume more, and for some of these women capable of ejaculating a pint or more. ---
**Author:** ![Askance](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/askance/32/8281_2.png) [@Askance](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Askance)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2009, 5:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/married-men-are-you-still-getting-blow-jobs/495254/112 "2009-05-08T05:54:07Z")
[QUOTE=The Flying Dutchman] [QUOTE=Askance] What difference would it make if it were or weren’t? Do you feel your wife is obliged to provide such just because it’s (so-called) normal elsewhere? What ever is or is not right in your marriage is entirely unrelated to what the random collection of folks who read this thread find to be what they consider “normal”. [/QUOTE] Can’t a fellow just be curious? [/QUOTE] You’re not posting from simply curiosity. You think there’s something wrong, don’t you? That you’re not getting what to believe is your due? > [@Mesquite-oh](#): > > Geez, \*\*Askance \*\*,let the guy ask a question. The Dope is a great place to ask questions about topics you might not feel comfortable asking your friend or neighbor. \*\*The Flying Dutchman \*\*is self disclosing something personal about his sex life to see if others have had similar experiences (changing sexual practices over the course of a long relationship) or concerns that what they are experiencing or feeling is unusual. I think that it is a great question for IMHO. If he expects to post such a question here and not have people try to read between the lines, well, maybe he’d be more comfortable on Yahoo Answers. ---
**Author:** ![BellRungBookShut-CandleSnuffed](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/bcef8e/32.png) [@BellRungBookShut-CandleSnuffed](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BellRungBookShut-CandleSnuffed)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2009, 7:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/married-men-are-you-still-getting-blow-jobs/495254/113 "2009-05-08T07:45:21Z")
Even if he is posting from more than just curiosity, so what? Let’s say he’s going to use this thread to convince his wife to give him more head. Yay, you figured it out. Your ticker tape parade is waiting outside for you. ---
**Author:** ![cosmosdan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a6a055/32.png) [@cosmosdan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cosmosdan)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2009, 12:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/married-men-are-you-still-getting-blow-jobs/495254/114 "2009-05-08T12:55:09Z")
> [@](#): > > **Married Men. Are You Still Getting Blow Jobs?** As long as I can still reach it. 😃 Hey, where ya from? I’m here all week! ---
**Author:** ![overlyverbose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/9dc877/32.png) [@overlyverbose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/overlyverbose)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2009, 2:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/married-men-are-you-still-getting-blow-jobs/495254/115 "2009-05-08T14:49:53Z")
For what it’s worth, I still happily give my husband blow jobs and we’ve been together nine years, married for five. However, I understand why you wouldn’t want to ask, particularly if you’re concerned she might not like doing it. That said, communication is important during sex and asking for specifics is kind of sexy, depending how you do it. And sometimes you won’t get what you want if you don’t ask. ---
**Author:** ![Belrix](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ed655f/32.png) [@Belrix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Belrix)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2009, 5:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/married-men-are-you-still-getting-blow-jobs/495254/116 "2009-05-08T17:15:12Z")
1st marriage: Rare 2nd marriage: more common at first, less frequent later 3rd marriage: frequently (but my 1st anniversary just passed so there’s not much history there) It makes good foreplay, IMO. I rarely “finish” that way and my wife benefits from my eagerness afterward. Win-win, I hope. ---
**Author:** ![ToeJam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/dfb087/32.png) [@ToeJam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ToeJam)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2009, 10:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/married-men-are-you-still-getting-blow-jobs/495254/117 "2009-05-08T22:07:58Z")
> [@Stoid](#): > > So…the prostate comes from what? Testicles are ovaries. Penises are clitoris’ (os it is es?). Girls have things that boys don’t have at all, but that’s easy to do; males just never develop a uterus. But how can a male possible have something completely unrelated to anything in a female body? That doesn’t seem to make sense. > > Oh…[hijack] The Prostate Gland are homologous to [Skene’s Gland](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Skene%27s_glands)’s in females. ---
**Author:** ![Malacandra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Malacandra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malacandra)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2009, 10:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/married-men-are-you-still-getting-blow-jobs/495254/118 "2009-05-08T22:30:11Z")
> [@Stoid](#): > > One thing that occurs to me in reading Unca CeCe is is that males and females both begin structurally female, and my understanding is that all the “boy” parts are fashioned from girl parts. Which is why, for instance, males have tits. We all have the same baseline, and men get rejiggered a bit. > > So…the prostate comes from what? Testicles are ovaries. Penises are clitoris’ (os it is es?). Girls have things that boys don’t have at all, but that’s easy to do; males just never develop a uterus. But how can a male possible have something completely unrelated to anything in a female body? That doesn’t seem to make sense. > > Oh…[hijack] Penises/clitorises (English plurals) or penes/clitorides {pee-knees/clit-or-i-daze} (Latin plurals). ---
**Author:** ![CanvasShoes](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/74df32/32.png) [@CanvasShoes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CanvasShoes)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2009, 10:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/married-men-are-you-still-getting-blow-jobs/495254/119 "2009-05-08T22:41:04Z")
If I were married, hubby would continue getting BJs as often as possible. For sure the foreplay kind…and depending upon the type of man he was, the “all the way to completion” kind as well. ---
**Author:** ![Stoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/stoid/32/272_2.png) [@Stoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stoid)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2009, 11:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/married-men-are-you-still-getting-blow-jobs/495254/120 "2009-05-08T23:01:55Z")
> [@Ro0sh](#): > > homologous Excellent word! Thanks for the info! [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/married-men-are-you-still-getting-blow-jobs/495254.md?page=5) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/married-men-are-you-still-getting-blow-jobs/495254.md?page=7)