# Married men would this bother you? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [May 28, 2011, 12:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/married-men-would-this-bother-you/583556 "2011-05-28T12:55:12Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 18\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![classyladyhp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/b5ac83/32.png) [@classyladyhp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/classyladyhp)\ **Post date:** [May 28, 2011, 12:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/married-men-would-this-bother-you/583556/1 "2011-05-28T12:55:12Z")
Would it bother you if your wife stopped wearing her wedding ring? Discuss. ---
**Author:** ![Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/qadgop_the_mercotan/32/83_2.png) [@Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Qadgop_the_Mercotan)\ **Post date:** [May 28, 2011, 1:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/married-men-would-this-bother-you/583556/2 "2011-05-28T13:11:32Z")
If done unilaterally and without prior discussion then yes it would. If discussion took place, and her reasons seemed credible to me, it would not. ---
**Author:** ![sevenwood](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/6de8d8/32.png) [@sevenwood](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sevenwood)\ **Post date:** [May 28, 2011, 1:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/married-men-would-this-bother-you/583556/3 "2011-05-28T13:45:56Z")
My wife is allergic to nickel. Nickel is used in gold jewelry to strengthen it. There have been times when she’s had to transfer her wedding ring to a chain that she wears around her neck. Now if that started to occur only when she went out for the evening I might start to get worried. ---
**Author:** ![don\_t\_ask](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e68b1a/32.png) [@don\_t\_ask](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/don_t_ask)\ **Post date:** [May 28, 2011, 1:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/married-men-would-this-bother-you/583556/4 "2011-05-28T13:51:24Z")
Both of my wives were registered nurses so I think they wore their rings fairly infrequently. I never noticed. ---
**Author:** ![Student\_Driver](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/3da27b/32.png) [@Student\_Driver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Student_Driver)\ **Post date:** [May 28, 2011, 1:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/married-men-would-this-bother-you/583556/5 "2011-05-28T13:55:06Z")
I answered “yes,” but that’s with the fact that in my relationships, ring-wearing has always been agreed upon to be a highly symbolic gesture, thus taking it off is also highly symbolic. If I went into a relationship where it was acknowledged beforehand that the ring would be coming off, it wouldn’t bug me, or as **Qadgop** notes, if it was done after discussion, I’d be okay. ---
**Author:** ![Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/left_hand_of_dorkness/32/7156_2.png) [@Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Left_Hand_of_Dorkness)\ **Post date:** [May 28, 2011, 2:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/married-men-would-this-bother-you/583556/6 "2011-05-28T14:44:42Z")
We got married in 2003. In 2010, I started getting terrible dermatitis on my hands (skin turning shiny and red, cracking open and oozing, painful), and it was worst under my wedding ring. I called it my seven-year-itch and stopped wearing the ring; eventually the condition cleared up. I don’t think it was entirely my wedding ring. Rather, I think that whatever was happening was exacerbated by being in a moist, relatively anaerobic environment (i.e., under my wedding ring after I shower or wash hands). I’ve since tried to get in the habit of taking my wedding ring off before and after showers, but the ring is a relatively tight fit, especially when I wake up, and I forget, and the condition starts to reappear. So I rarely wear it any more. Long story short: if my wife’s reason were something along those lines, I’d have no problem with it. If she stopped wearing it and was cagey about why, it’d bother me. ---
**Author:** ![grimpixie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/ecb155/32.png) [@grimpixie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/grimpixie)\ **Post date:** [May 28, 2011, 3:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/married-men-would-this-bother-you/583556/7 "2011-05-28T15:07:51Z")
> [@Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](#): > > If done unilaterally and without prior discussion then yes it would. > > If discussion took place, and her reasons seemed credible to me, it would not. This ---
**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\ **Post date:** [May 28, 2011, 3:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/married-men-would-this-bother-you/583556/8 "2011-05-28T15:33:58Z")
Totally depends on the reason. My wife is an RN, so she wears it infrequently. ---
**Author:** ![Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e99b99/32.png) [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diogenes_the_Cynic)\ **Post date:** [May 28, 2011, 3:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/married-men-would-this-bother-you/583556/9 "2011-05-28T15:41:17Z")
It would depend on the reason, obviously. If she stopped wearing the ring for reasons unrelated to the state of the marriage, then what’s to be upset about? If she stopped wearing the ring for reasons that _were_ related to the state of the marriage, then those underlying issues are the problem, not taking off the ring. Taking off the ring would be a symptom in that case, not a cause. I don’t wear my own ring because my arthritis doesn’t allow it, so I wouldn’t have much room to bitch if she got arthritis too. ---
**Author:** ![Eva\_Luna](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/e495f1/32.png) [@Eva\_Luna](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eva_Luna)\ **Post date:** [May 28, 2011, 4:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/married-men-would-this-bother-you/583556/10 "2011-05-28T16:21:09Z")
> [@Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](#): > > I’ve since tried to get in the habit of taking my wedding ring off before and after showers, but the ring is a relatively tight fit, especially when I wake up, and I forget, and the condition starts to reappear. So I rarely wear it any more. Why don’t you just take it to a jeweler and get it stretched a teeny bit? ---
**Author:** ![robardin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/43a26b/32.png) [@robardin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/robardin)\ **Post date:** [May 28, 2011, 4:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/married-men-would-this-bother-you/583556/11 "2011-05-28T16:26:18Z")
My wife HAS stopped wearing her wedding and engagement rings, and it has bothered me a bit… The reason being, she’s too overweight to put them on now (they won’t fit on her finger any more) and there’s not enough gold content to get them resized. I have absolute faith in her commitment to our vows though. ---
**Author:** ![Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/left_hand_of_dorkness/32/7156_2.png) [@Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Left_Hand_of_Dorkness)\ **Post date:** [May 28, 2011, 4:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/married-men-would-this-bother-you/583556/12 "2011-05-28T16:41:41Z")
> [@Eva\_Luna](#): > > Why don’t you just take it to a jeweler and get it stretched a teeny bit? 1. Cost 2. It’s not tight by afternoon. I’m not sure why–my guess is that my fingers swell overnight as I’m lying down. 3. That’s not the main issue anyway. ---
**Author:** ![Mahaloth](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mahaloth/32/1079_2.png) [@Mahaloth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mahaloth)\ **Post date:** [May 28, 2011, 5:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/married-men-would-this-bother-you/583556/13 "2011-05-28T17:25:39Z")
Yes, if it was all the time, like even when we go out to meet with friends or church. However, I don’t wear mine at home and neither does she. ---
**Author:** ![Suburban\_Plankton](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/suburban_plankton/32/219_2.png) [@Suburban\_Plankton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Suburban_Plankton)\ **Post date:** [May 28, 2011, 6:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/married-men-would-this-bother-you/583556/14 "2011-05-28T18:09:25Z")
\*\*Rhiannon8404 \*\*stopped wearing her wedding ring when she was pregnant with our son and it stopped fitting well. After he was born it was just never fit again even after she lost all her pregnancy weight and then some. We’ve talked about getting it resized, but haven’t gotten around to it yet (it’s only been 12 years…), and since she rarely wears rings at all we may never get around to it. ---
**Author:** ![Simplicio](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c37758/32.png) [@Simplicio](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Simplicio)\ **Post date:** [May 28, 2011, 6:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/married-men-would-this-bother-you/583556/15 "2011-05-28T18:37:27Z")
Both of us are pretty lackadaisical ring wearers. I wear mine when I’m going out on some sort of social function or something, but just going to work or shopping or whatever, I usually leave it home about 50% of the time. Mainly because I don’t like sleeping or showering with it on, and I’m pretty absent minded, so as I head out the door in the morning I forget to put it back on. She’s better about it then I am, but still often leaves the house without it, for pretty much the same reasons. So no. It wouldn’t bother me. ---
**Author:** ![Anaamika](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Anaamika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anaamika)\ **Post date:** [May 28, 2011, 7:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/married-men-would-this-bother-you/583556/16 "2011-05-28T19:28:07Z")
> [@Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](#): > > 1. Cost > 2. It’s not tight by afternoon. I’m not sure why–my guess is that my fingers swell overnight as I’m lying down. > 3. That’s not the main issue anyway. I just wanted to say, it’s doesn’t cost a lot to get a ring stretched out. I just had my mother’s ring stretched out, and it took five minutes and only cost me like $10, which was more of a service fee than anything. However, it has to be thick enough to do it in the first place. ---
**Author:** ![Eva\_Luna](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/e495f1/32.png) [@Eva\_Luna](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eva_Luna)\ **Post date:** [May 28, 2011, 7:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/married-men-would-this-bother-you/583556/17 "2011-05-28T19:48:58Z")
> [@Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](#): > > 1. It’s not tight by afternoon. I’m not sure why–my guess is that my fingers swell overnight as I’m lying down. Yeah, mine gets a bit tight if it’s really hot out and/or I’m a bit dehydrated. Cooling off and/or drinking a big glass of water usually helps. Of course, if it’s not a big deal to you, then it isn’t a big deal to you. ---
**Author:** ![Unintentionally\_Blank](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/unintentionally_blank/32/5418_2.png) [@Unintentionally\_Blank](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Unintentionally_Blank)\ **Post date:** [May 28, 2011, 7:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/married-men-would-this-bother-you/583556/18 "2011-05-28T19:54:52Z")
It has bothered me in the past…mostly because at the time, our marriage was in question. Now, she frequently goes without it and I hardly notice as our relationship is sound. I frequently go around without my ring…my hobbies have the potential for digit removal and she (and I) would much rather have the ring finger whole.