# Marvel Universe battle royal! **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [July 9, 2005, 4:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/marvel-universe-battle-royal/311758 "2005-07-09T16:09:59Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![klintypooh](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/3da27b/32.png) [@klintypooh](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/klintypooh)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2005, 4:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/marvel-universe-battle-royal/311758/1 "2005-07-09T16:09:59Z")
Say there was a huge fight between all the characters in the MU, but everybody had their superpowers removed, who would come out on top? This means Wolverine would still keep his claws but would’nt have his healing factor. Likewise magical powers are taken away so Juggy wouldn’t have his powers. To keep it sensible :rolleyes: we won’t include people the size of Galactus as he could just squish everybody. ---
**Author:** ![Cliffy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/59ef9b/32.png) [@Cliffy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cliffy)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2005, 5:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/marvel-universe-battle-royal/311758/2 "2005-07-09T17:08:01Z")
The Thing, hands down. He doesn’t quit. –Cliffy ---
**Author:** ![Wolfian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/7ea924/32.png) [@Wolfian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wolfian)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2005, 5:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/marvel-universe-battle-royal/311758/3 "2005-07-09T17:24:50Z")
I’m not a huge Marvel reader, but I’d think the Thing also. Sans superpowers who can even touch him? ---
**Author:** ![Kythereia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/e8c25b/32.png) [@Kythereia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kythereia)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2005, 5:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/marvel-universe-battle-royal/311758/4 "2005-07-09T17:42:55Z")
No superpowers? Where’s the fun in that? ---
**Author:** ![Neurotik](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/91b2a8/32.png) [@Neurotik](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Neurotik)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2005, 5:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/marvel-universe-battle-royal/311758/5 "2005-07-09T17:59:44Z")
> [@Wolfian](#): > > I’m not a huge Marvel reader, but I’d think the Thing also. Sans superpowers who can even touch him? Why would the Thing be any big deal without his superstrength? It would have to be one of the characters used to not having any superpowers. I think you have to go with the Punisher here. ---
**Author:** ![Sunshine\_and\_Smiles](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a5b964/32.png) [@Sunshine\_and\_Smiles](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunshine_and_Smiles)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2005, 7:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/marvel-universe-battle-royal/311758/6 "2005-07-09T19:29:52Z")
I’m thinking someone like Iron Fist, who’s a master of (kung fu, is it?). While everyone relies on their powers and would be essentially a regular person without them, Iron Fist still has his knowledge of the martial arts. Or Captain America, who doesn’t actually have powers, but was augmented with a special serum. Come to think of it, my moneys on the Captain. On Preview: Does Punisher get his guns? Because that would make a HUGE difference. ---
**Author:** ![Cliffy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/59ef9b/32.png) [@Cliffy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cliffy)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2005, 8:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/marvel-universe-battle-royal/311758/7 "2005-07-09T20:17:51Z")
> [@Neurotik](#): > > Why would the Thing be any big deal without his superstrength?. Like I said above – he doesn’t quit. It’s not even a contest. –Cliffy ---
**Author:** ![Harborwolf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/c89c15/32.png) [@Harborwolf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Harborwolf)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2005, 8:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/marvel-universe-battle-royal/311758/8 "2005-07-09T20:25:21Z")
He may not quit, but he can still get knocked out by a more skilled opponent such as Nick Fury, Black Widow, Iron Fist, or Captain America. I thought about Wolverine because he would still have his claws and fighting ability, but decided against him because he would die of adamantium poisoning without his healing factor to keep it in check. In the end, I sided with red, white, & blue boy. His abilities fall within the limits of a normal human, so the power outage wouldn’t affect him. The serum also affected a permanent change on his body, so he can’t revert. That leaves an incredibly skilled and in shape combatant. Captain America would be the last man standing. ---
**Author:** ![Alessan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alessan/32/465_2.png) [@Alessan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alessan)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2005, 8:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/marvel-universe-battle-royal/311758/9 "2005-07-09T20:27:18Z")
Is Conan the Barbarian officially part of the Marvel Universe? Because if he is, my money’s on him. ---
**Author:** ![Scott\_Plaid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/258eb7/32.png) [@Scott\_Plaid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scott_Plaid)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2005, 9:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/marvel-universe-battle-royal/311758/10 "2005-07-09T21:38:01Z")
If you call super serum a power, then Puny Parker pounds the Super Soldier like a [del]bug[/del] something squishable that begins with the letter P. No, wait, I forgot about the time he was magically turned into a teenager again, and sent to destroy a white supremacist’s summer camp. ---
**Author:** ![Kyla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/eada6e/32.png) [@Kyla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kyla)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2005, 9:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/marvel-universe-battle-royal/311758/11 "2005-07-09T21:54:20Z")
Wolverine’s claws don’t count as a superpower? Why not? ---
**Author:** ![Scott\_Plaid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/258eb7/32.png) [@Scott\_Plaid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scott_Plaid)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2005, 9:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/marvel-universe-battle-royal/311758/12 "2005-07-09T21:55:48Z")
See post 8, please. ---
**Author:** ![Fenris](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fenris/32/498_2.png) [@Fenris](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fenris)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2005, 10:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/marvel-universe-battle-royal/311758/13 "2005-07-09T22:12:49Z")
Shang Chi, Master Of Kung Fu: th’ guy can go up against a fully powered Spider-Man and hold his own–with no powers beyond 20+ years of martial arts training. I agree about Ben never quitting, but he _can_ be knocked out, he _can_ be affected by nerve-pinches, etc. ---
**Author:** ![Scott\_Plaid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/258eb7/32.png) [@Scott\_Plaid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scott_Plaid)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2005, 10:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/marvel-universe-battle-royal/311758/14 "2005-07-09T22:17:10Z")
> [@Kyla](#): > > Wolverine’s claws don’t count as a superpower? Why not? I read this too fast. The answer is that if there was some practical way of implanting metal claws inside a human body, then there is no reason why some insane doctor in real life couldn’t do it. Something an insane doctor can do in RL doesn’t count as a “Super Power”, but as a “masked Vigilante Power” ---
**Author:** ![Kyla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/eada6e/32.png) [@Kyla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kyla)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2005, 10:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/marvel-universe-battle-royal/311758/15 "2005-07-09T22:28:28Z")
> [@Scott Plaid](#): > > I read this too fast. The answer is that if there was some practical way of implanting metal claws inside a human body, then there is no reason why some insane doctor in real life couldn’t do it. Something an insane doctor can do in RL doesn’t count as a “Super Power”, but as a “masked Vigilante Power” But Wolverine’s claws aren’t solid adamantium. They’re an actual part of his body, they’re just coated in adamantium, like the rest of his bones. When he lost his adamantium, he retained the bone claws, which are apparently prone to breakage. ---
**Author:** ![Scott\_Plaid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/258eb7/32.png) [@Scott\_Plaid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scott_Plaid)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2005, 10:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/marvel-universe-battle-royal/311758/16 "2005-07-09T22:30:48Z")
Oh. Well, some parts of canon law are crap, and some are not. ---
**Author:** ![kjckjc](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/e36b37/32.png) [@kjckjc](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kjckjc)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2005, 11:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/marvel-universe-battle-royal/311758/17 "2005-07-09T23:01:19Z")
Well, it looks like the only rules are: 1) no giants (lets say over 12ft since I can step on things about half my size and we will put most Marvel citizens at 6ft) 2) No enhancements by magic, mutation, cosmic rays or the such. 3) Marvel universe. Since we are talking the Marvel Universe and not the Marvel Earth I would have to go with some alien race. I think the Autobots are in the MU. So maybe a small Autobot would be pretty tough to kill. But my gut instinct would be maybe one of the Asgardians. Like Thor. He isn’t enhanced in any way. He was just born that way. So I am going to go with either him or another godly race that is pretty much “just being themselves”. ---
**Author:** ![Revtim](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/revtim/32/1042_2.png) [@Revtim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Revtim)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2005, 11:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/marvel-universe-battle-royal/311758/18 "2005-07-09T23:09:33Z")
> [@Neurotik](#): > > I think you have to go with the Punisher here. There’s a “what if” or whatever non-continuity story called “The Punisher Kills The Marvel Universe” you might want to check out, if you haven’t already. ---
**Author:** ![Menocchio](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/9de053/32.png) [@Menocchio](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Menocchio)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2005, 11:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/marvel-universe-battle-royal/311758/19 "2005-07-09T23:14:20Z")
> [@Fenris](#): > > Shang Chi, Master Of Kung Fu: th’ guy can go up against a fully powered Spider-Man and hold his own–with no powers beyond 20+ years of martial arts training. I agree about Ben never quitting, but he _can_ be knocked out, he _can_ be affected by nerve-pinches, etc. Yup. Him, or Captain America (assuming for the moment that Cap doesn’t revert to 90-pound weakling). Even if you take away the Super-Soldier edge Cap enjoys, and the shield, Cap’s still a pretty fierce fighter and share’s Ben’s never-say-die attitude. ---
**Author:** ![Fenris](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fenris/32/498_2.png) [@Fenris](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fenris)\ **Post date:** [July 10, 2005, 12:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/marvel-universe-battle-royal/311758/20 "2005-07-10T00:20:16Z")
I’d give the edge to Shang Chi, even assuming Cap has his shield. It’d be one helluva fight, but I think Shang Chi would squeek out a win. If Cap _doesn’t_ have his shield, it’s still a good fight, but not so much of a squeeker. Punisher just isn’t good enough: he doesn’t have good enough aim or fast enough reflexes. The times we’ve seen him fire at characters like Daredevil, he almost always misses. Besides, if the Punsher could take out Cap, then so could any well-trained Nazi sniper–and they don’t/didn’t. QED. 😉 [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/marvel-universe-battle-royal/311758.md?page=2)