# Mary had a steamboat... **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [February 25, 2005, 1:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mary-had-a-steamboat/291793 "2005-02-25T01:04:00Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 10\ **Page:** 6
**Author:** ![xizor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/xizor/32/102_2.png) [@xizor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/xizor)\ **Post date:** [October 8, 2010, 7:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mary-had-a-steamboat/291793/101 "2010-10-08T19:14:44Z")
There was an old farmer who lived on a rock He sat in the meadow just shaking his … Fist at some boys who were down by the crick Their feet in the water their hands on their … Marbles and playthings and at half past four There came a young lady she looked like a … Pretty young creature she sat on the grass She pulled up her dress and she showed them her … Ruffles and laces and white fluffy duck She said she was learning a new way to … Bring up her children so they would not spit While the boys in the barnyard were shoveling … Refuse and litter from yesterday’s hunt While the girl in the meadow was rubbing her … Eyes at fellow down by the dock He looked like a guy with a sizable … Home in the country with a big fence out front If he asked her politely she’d show him her … Little pet dog who was subject to fits And maybe she’d let him grab hold of her … Small tender hands with a movement so quick And then she’d bend over and suck on his … Candy so tasty made of butterscotch And then he’d spread whip cream all over her … Cookies that she had laid out on the shelf If you think this is dirty you can go f\*ck yourself! ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [October 8, 2010, 7:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mary-had-a-steamboat/291793/102 "2010-10-08T19:20:08Z")
They built a ship Titanic to sail the ocean blue, And they thought they had a ship that the water wouldn’t go through. The Titantic didn’t make it across the ocean blue, it was sad when the great ship went down. It was sad (so sad), it was sad (so sad), it was sad when the great ship went down to the bottom of the (husbands and wives, little children lost their lives), it was sad when the great ship went down. ---
**Author:** ![Skywatcher](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/skywatcher/32/254_2.png) [@Skywatcher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skywatcher)\ **Post date:** [October 8, 2010, 7:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mary-had-a-steamboat/291793/103 "2010-10-08T19:24:37Z")
Never heard of [this version of “Lulu Had a Baby”](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C6K_GZsZ7hE) until it showed up in a Related list. ---
**Author:** ![HoboStew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/f17d59/32.png) [@HoboStew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HoboStew)\ **Post date:** [October 8, 2010, 7:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mary-had-a-steamboat/291793/104 "2010-10-08T19:39:04Z")
I heard several variations on this, often swapping out the nationality in the first line, but this is the version I like best: 2 Irishmen, 2 Irishmen, were digging in a ditch one called the other one a dirty son of a - Mitchell Murphy had a dog a dirty dog was he He gave it to his girlfriend to keep her company She taught it, she taught it, she taught it how to jump It jumped right up her petticoat and bit her in the - Country boy, city boy, sitting on a rock Along came a bumblebee and stung them in the - Cocktail, ginger ale, 5 cents a glass And if you don’t like it you can shove it right up your - Ask me no more questions, I’ll tell you no more lies But if you get hit with a bucket of shit, be sure and close your eyes! ---
**Author:** ![Azile](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/d07c76/32.png) [@Azile](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Azile)\ **Post date:** [October 10, 2010, 5:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mary-had-a-steamboat/291793/105 "2010-10-10T05:30:33Z")
This was a jump-rope rhyme: Fudge, fudge! Call the judge! Someone’s got a newborn ba~by Wrap it up in tissue paper, send it down the elevator First floor Second floor etc ---
**Author:** ![postcards](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/8e8cbc/32.png) [@postcards](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/postcards)\ **Post date:** [October 10, 2010, 1:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mary-had-a-steamboat/291793/106 "2010-10-10T13:48:15Z")
> [@sandrad5827](#): > > Here’s my favorite: > > Late one morning, In the middle of the night, > Two dead boys started a fight. > Back to back, they faced each other > Pulled out swords and shot each other > A deaf policeman heard the noise > And came and killed the two dead boys > If you don’t believe my story’s true > Ask the blind man; he saw it too. A version of which was in the original post, _four and a half_ years ago. ---
**Author:** ![Soccerislife](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e36b37/32.png) [@Soccerislife](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Soccerislife)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2013, 5:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mary-had-a-steamboat/291793/107 "2013-07-09T05:16:40Z")
When I was younger we did one that went like this: Down by the banks of the hanky banky where the bull frogs jump from bank to banky and with a heep hop soda pop hey mr willy and he went ker plops ---
**Author:** ![Soylent\_Juicy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/82dd89/32.png) [@Soylent\_Juicy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Soylent_Juicy)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2013, 2:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mary-had-a-steamboat/291793/108 "2013-07-09T14:58:37Z")
I didn’t read the whole zombie thread but does anybody remember this one? You stood in a circle and held your hands open palm-up - your left hand went on top of the person on your left’s hand and your right hand went under the person on your right’s hand. As you sang the song everybody moved their hands so they slapped the person on their right’s hand - kind of like “the wave” at hockey games - and the song went like this: “Stella ella olla quack quack quack Es chico chico cheeky cheeky chack chack Es chico chico … velo…velo…velo velo velo now ONE TWO THREE FOUR…” and on “FIVE” wherever the “wave” was, the person tried to slap the person on their right’s hand. If they hit then the person slapped was “out”, but if the person pulled away in time then the slapper was “out”. The circle got smaller and smaller each time the song was sung until only two people were left, then they had to arm wrestle with a third person bent over using their back as the “table”. When the song got to “FIVE” the arm wrestle started and whoever won that was the winner. I can’t believe I actually remember this. ---
**Author:** ![vontsira](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/51bf81/32.png) [@vontsira](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vontsira)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2013, 7:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mary-had-a-steamboat/291793/109 "2013-07-12T19:45:59Z")
Nebuchadnezzar, the king of the Jews, Sold his wife for a pair of shoes; When the shoes began to wear, Nebuchadnezzar began to swear. When the swear began to stop, Nebuchadnezzar bought a shop; When the shop began to sell, Nebuchadnezzar bought a bell – When the bell began to ring, Nebuchadnezzar began to sing. When the sing began to screech, Nebuchadnezzar went to the beach. When the beach became a desert, Nebuchadnezzar said, “How unpleasant !” ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [July 13, 2013, 7:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mary-had-a-steamboat/291793/110 "2013-07-13T07:36:15Z")
From the mid-50s: Casey and Murphy were digging in a ditch; Casey called Murphy a dirty son of a . . . Beaver, beaver, sittin’ on a log; Along came a bumble bee and stung him on his . . . Cocktail, ginger ale, five cents a glass; If you don’t like it, shove it up your . . . Ask me no questions and I will tell no lies; Casey hit Murphy, and now he’s paralyzed. I can’t believe I remember this, after almost 60 years. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mary-had-a-steamboat/291793.md?page=5)