# Mary-Kate and Ashley: Double Trouble in Little China **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [May 23, 2003, 2:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mary-kate-and-ashley-double-trouble-in-little-china/177040 "2003-05-23T14:44:14Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![gex\_gex](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/94ad74/32.png) [@gex\_gex](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gex_gex)\ **Post date:** [May 26, 2003, 1:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mary-kate-and-ashley-double-trouble-in-little-china/177040/61 "2003-05-26T13:11:55Z")
> [@](#): > > \*originally posted by > They are NOT attractive. Not, not, not, not, and not! > > They look like eels. Tell me they don’t look like eels. Who’s buying their crap now? Teenage girls. Are they doing so because the kiddos are attractive? Teenage girls ain’t buying it. They’re being firmly (and successfully) targeted at the tween (7-13) market. They’re perfect for the age bracket - older and more sophisticated, but doing nothing edgy to freak out the parents providing the cash. Do you really expect any 16 year old girl to have an interest in the Olsen twins - “Well, I got my driver’s license today, so I think I’ll celebrate by dressing up my Mary Kate and Ashley dolls, while watching _Mary Kate and Ashley: Winning London_” And in line with this, the perfect crossover would see the girls going to Hogwarts School and meeting Avril Lavigne there. ---
**Author:** ![gex\_gex](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/94ad74/32.png) [@gex\_gex](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gex_gex)\ **Post date:** [May 26, 2003, 1:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mary-kate-and-ashley-double-trouble-in-little-china/177040/62 "2003-05-26T13:14:28Z")
I’ll try again :roll eyes: > [@](#): > > _originally posted by dantheman_ > They are NOT attractive. Not, not, not, not, and not! > > They look like eels. Tell me they don’t look like eels. Who’s buying their crap now? Teenage girls. Are they doing so because the kiddos are attractive? Teenage girls ain’t buying it. They’re being firmly (and successfully) targeted at the tween (7-13) market. They’re perfect for the age bracket - older and more sophisticated, but doing nothing edgy to freak out the parents providing the cash. Do you really expect any 16 year old girl to have an interest in the Olsen twins - “Well, I got my driver’s license today, so I think I’ll celebrate by dressing up my Mary Kate and Ashley dolls, while watching _Mary Kate and Ashley: Winning London_” And in line with this, the perfect crossover would see the girls going to Hogwarts School and meeting Avril Lavigne there. ---
**Author:** ![Dijon\_Warlock](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a9a28c/32.png) [@Dijon\_Warlock](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dijon_Warlock)\ **Post date:** [May 26, 2003, 8:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mary-kate-and-ashley-double-trouble-in-little-china/177040/63 "2003-05-26T20:48:07Z")
_Harry Potter and the Sk83r Twins_. I love it. ---
**Author:** ![Dijon\_Warlock](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a9a28c/32.png) [@Dijon\_Warlock](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dijon_Warlock)\ **Post date:** [May 26, 2003, 8:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mary-kate-and-ashley-double-trouble-in-little-china/177040/64 "2003-05-26T20:49:41Z")
Who the heck put a ‘3’ in there? ---
**Author:** ![Tangent](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tangent/32/3098_2.png) [@Tangent](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tangent)\ **Post date:** [May 26, 2003, 10:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mary-kate-and-ashley-double-trouble-in-little-china/177040/65 "2003-05-26T22:07:51Z")
The 3-fairies did it. Th3y can b3 pr3tty p3sky at tim3s. Damn fairi3s! ---
**Author:** ![MeanOldLady](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/meanoldlady/32/10737_2.png) [@MeanOldLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MeanOldLady)\ **Post date:** [May 26, 2003, 10:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mary-kate-and-ashley-double-trouble-in-little-china/177040/66 "2003-05-26T22:46:56Z")
Fa3ri3s, 3v3n. 😉 God, that is annoying. ---
**Author:** ![dantheman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dantheman/32/9421_2.png) [@dantheman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dantheman)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2003, 12:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mary-kate-and-ashley-double-trouble-in-little-china/177040/67 "2003-05-27T00:33:00Z")
It’s the 733T fairies! (or whatever…) ---
**Author:** ![aberge30](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/65b543/32.png) [@aberge30](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/aberge30)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2003, 1:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mary-kate-and-ashley-double-trouble-in-little-china/177040/68 "2003-05-27T01:06:11Z")
I’ve seen them in person and can’t see them having much of an adult career. Unless they hit a growing spurt in the next couple of years, they will be playing teenage roles into their 30’s. Maybe they can get roles as Hobbits in the next series of J. R. Tolkien movies. They’re bodies are very small and their limbs are stubby. They are almost Dwarvish with heads that are too big for their bodies. I can’t recall any major film or stage actress being so short and stubby. Sure, there are some short female lead actress’s but they are well proportioned so they don’t look small on the screen. ---
**Author:** ![teemingONE](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/b4bc9f/32.png) [@teemingONE](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/teemingONE)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2003, 4:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mary-kate-and-ashley-double-trouble-in-little-china/177040/69 "2003-05-27T04:14:42Z")
If they don’t try to make a big jump from tween movies to more adult movies, they might have a chance. Maybe they should go on SNL and be given very adult themed roles? Maybe as a gimmick they split up, each having their own acting style and therefor making a career for themselves. Maybe one can get her own sitcom. 10 years from then they can have a big reuniting on the big screen. ---
**Author:** ![Zorro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/ad7895/32.png) [@Zorro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zorro)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2003, 8:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mary-kate-and-ashley-double-trouble-in-little-china/177040/70 "2003-05-27T08:21:26Z")
**Harry Potter and the sk8er Twins** is an inspired idea. Anyone care to offer a synopsis? ---
**Author:** ![dantheman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dantheman/32/9421_2.png) [@dantheman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dantheman)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2003, 9:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mary-kate-and-ashley-double-trouble-in-little-china/177040/71 "2003-05-27T09:42:35Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by teemingONE \* > \*\*If they don’t try to make a big jump from tween movies to more adult movies, they might have a chance. Maybe they should go on SNL and be given very adult themed roles? Maybe as a gimmick they split up, each having their own acting style and therefor making a career for themselves. Maybe one can get her own sitcom. 10 years from then they can have a big reuniting on the big screen. \*\* This is good. What we need is good twin/bad twin. One can be a movie star/model, the other can descend into drugs, depression, madness, and murder. Or maybe they could both go both routes. A new E! True Hollywood Story! ---
**Author:** ![Zorro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/ad7895/32.png) [@Zorro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zorro)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2003, 11:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mary-kate-and-ashley-double-trouble-in-little-china/177040/72 "2003-05-27T11:43:34Z")
I’m not sure about drugs, depression, madness and murder. That may be a little over the top. However, sex’n’drugs’n’rock’n’roll, definitely. Perhaps Ashley could continue in the all-American wholesome vein, modelling for Talbot’s and acting in **Little House on the Prairie: The Next Generation** , Mary-Kate could break free from the shackles of mass marketing and go on tour with her own heavy metal band, thus expressing herself the way she always wanted to. I’m not certain what the band would be called, but I’m certain that some of you can help. ---
**Author:** ![dantheman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dantheman/32/9421_2.png) [@dantheman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dantheman)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2003, 11:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mary-kate-and-ashley-double-trouble-in-little-china/177040/73 "2003-05-27T11:48:46Z")
_Creepazoid Sapsucker and the Phlegmy Leeches_ ---
**Author:** ![TwistofFate](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/cdc98d/32.png) [@TwistofFate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TwistofFate)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2003, 12:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mary-kate-and-ashley-double-trouble-in-little-china/177040/74 "2003-05-27T12:24:40Z")
I don’t know about a plot synopsis for Happy Potter and the Sk8r Twins, but I reckon the soundtrack will involve a lot of Wah-Wah guitar, saxaphone solo’s and 80’s reject lounge synths. bow wow wakka chikka galore. ---
**Author:** ![Zorro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/ad7895/32.png) [@Zorro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zorro)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2003, 2:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mary-kate-and-ashley-double-trouble-in-little-china/177040/75 "2003-05-27T14:47:09Z")
No it won’t, it will all be slightly angsty teenage punk rock-light by Avril Lavigne. And Mary-Kate, obviously. ---
**Author:** ![Zebra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/c0e974/32.png) [@Zebra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zebra)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2003, 7:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mary-kate-and-ashley-double-trouble-in-little-china/177040/76 "2003-05-27T19:06:27Z")
What Ever Happened to Baby Ashley? MK You would’nt be doing this if I wasn’t stuck in this chair! A But you are stuck in that chair! You are! Either that or Mary Kat and Ashley are murdered by Zebra. ---
**Author:** ![cletus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f08c70/32.png) [@cletus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cletus)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2003, 7:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mary-kate-and-ashley-double-trouble-in-little-china/177040/77 "2003-05-27T19:54:48Z")
Mary Kate is totally the hot one. So much hotter then Ashley. Ashley’s, like, a total slut, d00d. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![teemingONE](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/b4bc9f/32.png) [@teemingONE](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/teemingONE)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2003, 8:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mary-kate-and-ashley-double-trouble-in-little-china/177040/78 "2003-05-27T20:46:04Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by cletus \* > \*\*Mary Kate is totally the hot one. So much hotter then Ashley. Ashley’s, like, a total slut, d00d. 😉 \*\* For some reason I have always been more attracted to mary kate. I dont know why, maybe its the characters she plays, or maybe just her name. For whatever reason, she is totally the hot one. ---
**Author:** ![dvddesigner](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/8baadc/32.png) [@dvddesigner](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dvddesigner)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2003, 7:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mary-kate-and-ashley-double-trouble-in-little-china/177040/79 "2003-05-29T07:04:30Z")
Mary Kate really is the hotter of the two. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Fight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/90ced4/32.png) [@Cat\_Fight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Fight)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2003, 4:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mary-kate-and-ashley-double-trouble-in-little-china/177040/80 "2003-05-30T04:17:49Z")
No, you’ve got it totally wrong, guys. Ashley’s the talented one. Mary Kate is dragging her down! [http://www.theonion.com/onion3729/mary-kate\_olsen.html](http://www.theonion.com/onion3729/mary-kate_olsen.html) [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mary-kate-and-ashley-double-trouble-in-little-china/177040.md?page=3)