# MASTER LIST (Newbies only) part 2 **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [October 18, 2000, 2:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/master-list-newbies-only-part-2/37355 "2000-10-18T02:09:37Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 20
**Author:** ![it\_sjustme](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/da6949/32.png) [@it\_sjustme](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/it_sjustme)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2003, 5:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/master-list-newbies-only-part-2/37355/383 "2003-03-11T05:45:19Z")
Cool thread! I loved going back to the beginning of this thread and seeing user names of some of my favorite “posters” signing in when THEY were newbies!😃 ---
**Author:** ![Nvme77](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/c89c15/32.png) [@Nvme77](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nvme77)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2003, 6:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/master-list-newbies-only-part-2/37355/384 "2003-03-11T06:13:39Z")
Shiny and new, come aboard…I’m expecting youuuuuuuuu. The love boat… ---
**Author:** ![catnoe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/7ab992/32.png) [@catnoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/catnoe)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2003, 6:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/master-list-newbies-only-part-2/37355/385 "2003-03-11T06:37:29Z")
Why not…here I am, love me or leave me, but I’ve had no complaints yet. ---
**Author:** ![WhetherMan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/8e7dd6/32.png) [@WhetherMan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WhetherMan)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2003, 6:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/master-list-newbies-only-part-2/37355/386 "2003-03-11T06:54:32Z")
Ahem… A guy walks into a bar with his pet monkey. He orders a drink and while he’s drinking, the monkey starts jumping all over the place. The monkey grabs some olives off the bar and eats them, then grabs some sliced limes and eats them, then jumps up on the pool table, grabs the cue ball, sticks it in his mouth and swallows it whole. The bartender screams at the guy, “Did you see what your monkey just did?” The guy says, “No, what?” “He just ate the cue ball off my pool table - whole!” says the bartender. “Yeah, that doesn’t surprise me,” replies the patron. “He eats everything in sight, the little twerp. I’ll pay for the cue ball and stuff.” He finishes his drink, pays his bill, and leaves. Two weeks later he’s in the bar again, and he has his monkey with him. He orders a drink and the monkey starts running around the bar again. While the man is drinking, the monkey finds a maraschino cherry on the bar. He grabs it, sticks it up his butt, pulls it out, and eats it. The bartender is disgusted. “Did you see what your monkey did now?” “Now what?” asks the patron. “Well, he stuck a maraschino cherry up his butt, then pulled it out and ate it!” says the barkeeper. “Yeah, that doesn’t surprise me,” replies the patron. “He still eats everything in sight, but ever since he ate that damn cue ball he measures everything first!” \ ---
**Author:** ![t-keela](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/a3d4f5/32.png) [@t-keela](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/t-keela)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2003, 7:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/master-list-newbies-only-part-2/37355/387 "2003-03-11T07:05:28Z")
Heh-heh… **WhetherMan** not bad 😃 Newbie badges sold here? Badges? We don’t need no stinking badges… ---
**Author:** ![juji\_mojo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/7ea924/32.png) [@juji\_mojo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/juji_mojo)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2003, 7:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/master-list-newbies-only-part-2/37355/388 "2003-03-11T07:08:44Z")
guess Im new enough to post here… hello… ---
**Author:** ![siberia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/siberia/32/9129_2.png) [@siberia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/siberia)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2003, 10:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/master-list-newbies-only-part-2/37355/389 "2003-03-11T22:14:48Z")
Long time lurker…first time poster:D ---
**Author:** ![Pelleas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/e8c25b/32.png) [@Pelleas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pelleas)\ **Post date:** [March 12, 2003, 2:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/master-list-newbies-only-part-2/37355/390 "2003-03-12T02:52:37Z")
Another Texas newbie here. ---
**Author:** ![Meros](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/8797f3/32.png) [@Meros](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Meros)\ **Post date:** [March 12, 2003, 3:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/master-list-newbies-only-part-2/37355/391 "2003-03-12T03:00:27Z")
Been around since December but a total newbie here 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Miss\_Piggy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/439d5e/32.png) [@Miss\_Piggy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miss_Piggy)\ **Post date:** [March 12, 2003, 5:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/master-list-newbies-only-part-2/37355/392 "2003-03-12T05:38:40Z")
I’ve been reading The Straight Dope and Threadspotting for a few years, but I’ve only just signed up to post. I’m glad to see there are so many other newbies. ---
**Author:** ![mallocks](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f4b2a3/32.png) [@mallocks](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mallocks)\ **Post date:** [March 12, 2003, 1:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/master-list-newbies-only-part-2/37355/393 "2003-03-12T13:16:05Z")
ooh, didn’t notice this thread. hi y’all. I’m a newbie, u’d never guess 😛 ---
**Author:** ![teleute12](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/3d9bf3/32.png) [@teleute12](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/teleute12)\ **Post date:** [March 12, 2003, 1:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/master-list-newbies-only-part-2/37355/394 "2003-03-12T13:26:50Z")
_Waves to other new folk_ ---
**Author:** ![S\_or\_L](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d78d45/32.png) [@S\_or\_L](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/S_or_L)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2003, 3:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/master-list-newbies-only-part-2/37355/395 "2003-04-05T15:05:39Z")
_Hold on, I’m a comin’. I’ll be there With a love that will rescue you_ ---
**Author:** ![Madame\_Zelda](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ed8c4c/32.png) [@Madame\_Zelda](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Madame_Zelda)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2003, 3:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/master-list-newbies-only-part-2/37355/396 "2003-04-05T15:14:11Z")
Stop pushing. I said I’ll do it… All right, already! :toe shuffle, sniff: OK, I’m new. Still have that new car smell. _beep_ ---
**Author:** ![AncientHumanoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ancienthumanoid/32/278_2.png) [@AncientHumanoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AncientHumanoid)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2003, 4:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/master-list-newbies-only-part-2/37355/398 "2003-04-05T16:55:56Z")
Long time lurker First time poster What is this [_pie_](http://www.weebl.jolt.co.uk/pie.htm) thingy you all keep bringing up? :dubious: ---
**Author:** ![Fritz\_The\_Cat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/f17d59/32.png) [@Fritz\_The\_Cat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fritz_The_Cat)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2003, 2:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/master-list-newbies-only-part-2/37355/399 "2003-04-06T02:15:55Z")
Hi all! ---
**Author:** ![Shana](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/3bc359/32.png) [@Shana](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shana)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2003, 6:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/master-list-newbies-only-part-2/37355/400 "2003-04-06T06:09:44Z")
Yee Haw! 100 posts…but alas, still new.😉 ---
**Author:** ![Sqube](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/aca169/32.png) [@Sqube](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sqube)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2003, 9:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/master-list-newbies-only-part-2/37355/401 "2003-04-06T09:54:25Z")
Definitely a noob. Read Straight Dope and Triumph, tried out [straightdope.com](http://straightdope.com), found the message boards, and it was a done deal. ---
**Author:** ![imthjckaz](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/imthjckaz/32/3223_2.png) [@imthjckaz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/imthjckaz)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2003, 12:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/master-list-newbies-only-part-2/37355/402 "2003-04-06T12:41:59Z")
Long time poster, first time lurker. How do you get to be newbie anyway? ---
**Author:** ![Calladair](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f07891/32.png) [@Calladair](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Calladair)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2003, 1:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/master-list-newbies-only-part-2/37355/403 "2003-04-06T13:30:47Z")
Awww, do I _have_ to post here? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/master-list-newbies-only-part-2/37355.md?page=19) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/master-list-newbies-only-part-2/37355.md?page=21)