# Masturbate for peace. **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [March 31, 2003, 3:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/masturbate-for-peace/165353 "2003-03-31T03:13:44Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 7\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![SPOOFE](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c5a1d2/32.png) [@SPOOFE](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SPOOFE)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2003, 6:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/masturbate-for-peace/165353/41 "2003-04-01T06:14:45Z")
> [@](#): > > Apparently SPPOFE doesn’t have much of a problem getting off anywhere… Actually, I have great difficulty… damned scars… ---
**Author:** ![Largo62](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/45deac/32.png) [@Largo62](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Largo62)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2003, 8:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/masturbate-for-peace/165353/42 "2003-04-01T08:05:16Z")
Anyway, thanks for the warning, **SPOOFE**. I’ll never use anything but Kentucky Jelly! 😃 ---
**Author:** ![SPOOFE](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c5a1d2/32.png) [@SPOOFE](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SPOOFE)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2003, 8:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/masturbate-for-peace/165353/43 "2003-04-01T08:41:17Z")
I’m an inspiration for future generations… for what _not_ to do! ---
**Author:** ![H8\_2\_W8](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/c77e96/32.png) [@H8\_2\_W8](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/H8_2_W8)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2003, 1:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/masturbate-for-peace/165353/44 "2003-04-01T13:34:36Z")
I swear on my mother’s grave that the following is true: I apparently saw a peace activist on the commute home yesterday. Leaving Indy, heading south on Hwy 37 was a young woman driving a Toyota in the left lane and when I slowly passed on the right lane I could see she had her left hand in her gray sweatpants rubbing away (another positive of being up higher in an SUV!). She had IU and greek letters as window decals and was from a county in the north part of the state, so I assume she was a student on her way back to Bloomington. She looked more like a cute blonde sorority girl than a radical hippie subversive peacenik, but since she was clearly masturbating she must have been a piece activist. * * * Disclaimers: My mother is not actually dead, but she has pre-paid for a cemetary plot. All puns intended. ---
**Author:** ![SCSimmons](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e495f1/32.png) [@SCSimmons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SCSimmons)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2003, 3:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/masturbate-for-peace/165353/45 "2003-04-01T15:23:51Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Mtgman \* > **I wouldn’t count on gettin off that easy in Texas pardner.** Nah, I don’t foresee a problem. Probably easier to escape conviction around these parts, because “he needed killin’” is still a valid defense. Now once you’re convicted, you’d better get your appeals in before the noose gets tied … ---
**Author:** ![beagledave](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/6de8d8/32.png) [@beagledave](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/beagledave)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2003, 3:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/masturbate-for-peace/165353/46 "2003-04-01T15:36:35Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by SCSimmons \* > \*\*…, before the noose gets tied … \*\* Is that one of them there euphamisms like “polishing the bishop”? ---
**Author:** ![js\_africanus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/87869e/32.png) [@js\_africanus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/js_africanus)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2003, 4:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/masturbate-for-peace/165353/47 "2003-04-01T16:44:27Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by beagledave \* > \*\*Is that one of them there euphamisms like “polishing the bishop”? \*\* More like a dysphamism like “punchin’ the munchkin”. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/masturbate-for-peace/165353.md?page=2)