# Masturbating while breastfeeding **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [February 22, 2011, 3:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/masturbating-while-breastfeeding/572191 "2011-02-22T03:25:08Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Alice\_The\_Goon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ed8c4c/32.png) [@Alice\_The\_Goon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alice_The_Goon)\ **Post date:** [February 22, 2011, 5:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/masturbating-while-breastfeeding/572191/21 "2011-02-22T05:40:51Z")
I don’t care about being judgy, this is just … ew. Plus, it seems very likely that there could be an association that is formed, and after awhile just looking at your baby gets you all… where’s that pukey smiley I’ve been wanting?? ---
**Author:** ![Magiver](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/4491bb/32.png) [@Magiver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Magiver)\ **Post date:** [February 22, 2011, 5:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/masturbating-while-breastfeeding/572191/22 "2011-02-22T05:41:37Z")
Her son’s first word will be “Jocasta”. (Oedipus’s mother). ---
**Author:** ![Alan\_Smithee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/2acd7d/32.png) [@Alan\_Smithee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alan_Smithee)\ **Post date:** [February 22, 2011, 5:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/masturbating-while-breastfeeding/572191/23 "2011-02-22T05:42:33Z")
I’m a guy, and I don’t have any kids. I can understand the reaction people are having, but honestly, I don’t think it’s a big deal. If my mom wrote an article like that, I’d be a bit freaked out because she was writing about sex, but I don’t think I’d be bothered beyond that. Masturbation’s just not a big deal. If a woman orgasmed just from breastfeeding _without_ masturbating, I’d think that was a bit fucked up, but I know that a woman’s body becomes more sensitive when she’s breastfeeding, and anyone’s body become more sensitive when they’re aroused. I can see how those things could work together. I wouldn’t assume that a woman who masturbated while breastfeeding was having erotic thoughts about her baby, just that her body was responding to two types of physical stimulation at once that each cause the release of pleasure hormones. Of course it’s going to feel good. ---
**Author:** ![Alice\_The\_Goon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ed8c4c/32.png) [@Alice\_The\_Goon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alice_The_Goon)\ **Post date:** [February 22, 2011, 5:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/masturbating-while-breastfeeding/572191/24 "2011-02-22T05:45:05Z")
> [@Alan\_Smithee](#): > > I’m a guy, and I don’t have any kids. I can understand the reaction people are having, but honestly, I don’t think it’s a big deal. > > If my mom wrote an article like that, I’d be a bit freaked out because she was writing about sex, but I don’t think I’d be bothered beyond that. Masturbation’s just not a big deal. If a woman orgasmed just from breastfeeding _without_ masturbating, I’d think that was a bit fucked up, but I know that a woman’s body becomes more sensitive when she’s breastfeeding, and anyone’s body become more sensitive when they’re aroused. I can see how those things could work together. > > I wouldn’t assume that a woman who masturbated while breastfeeding was having erotic thoughts about her baby, just that her body was responding to two types of physical stimulation at once that each cause the release of pleasure hormones. Of course it’s going to feel good. Fine, but can’t she put the baby _down_ and _then_ go to town on herself? If a man said something like, “Yeah, seeing my baby suck on the bottle while I’m feeding her really gets me hot so I jack off while I’m holding her”, would that be okay, too? ---
**Author:** ![fifty-six](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/5daacb/32.png) [@fifty-six](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/fifty-six)\ **Post date:** [February 22, 2011, 6:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/masturbating-while-breastfeeding/572191/25 "2011-02-22T06:04:56Z")
I suppose no evil or harm is done. It is still weird. What about an adult to experiment with? ---
**Author:** ![Alan\_Smithee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/2acd7d/32.png) [@Alan\_Smithee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alan_Smithee)\ **Post date:** [February 22, 2011, 6:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/masturbating-while-breastfeeding/572191/26 "2011-02-22T06:32:12Z")
> [@Alice\_The\_Goon](#): > > Fine, but can’t she put the baby _down_ and _then_ go to town on herself? > > If a man said something like, “Yeah, seeing my baby suck on the bottle while I’m feeding her really gets me hot so I jack off while I’m holding her”, would that be okay, too? She could, but if, as I suggest, she’s not thinking erotic thoughts _about the baby_, what difference does it make? I’m a strict consequentialist when it comes to morality. If no one is potentially harmed, it’s no big deal. Weird, maybe, but so what. As for the guy, you’re suggesting that the baby itself (and not the physical response to breastfeeding) is being cathected as an erotic stimulus. That has enormous potential to lead to damaging interactions later on. If that’s not the case, though… Mind you, a lot of this comes down to believability. I’m inclined (for whatever reason; maybe I have an idealized view of motherhood) to believe a woman who says she’s not thinking of the baby erotically in that situation. I’d be less inclined to believe a man. If I heard about a man masturbating while interacting with a baby, I’d think he’s a perv. I can’t think of anything non-pervy that would make a man do that. But all that said, there is still a chance I’d be wrong. Can’t imagine it, and wouldn’t give him the benefit of the doubt, but still, there you have it. ---
**Author:** ![YogSothoth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/8edcca/32.png) [@YogSothoth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/YogSothoth)\ **Post date:** [February 22, 2011, 6:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/masturbating-while-breastfeeding/572191/27 "2011-02-22T06:35:03Z")
I need a rule 34 on this… ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [February 22, 2011, 7:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/masturbating-while-breastfeeding/572191/28 "2011-02-22T07:26:49Z")
**Alan Smithee** , but she’s basically using her kid as a sex toy. THAT’S the part that’s disturbing. ---
**Author:** ![Barkis\_is\_Willin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/a183cd/32.png) [@Barkis\_is\_Willin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Barkis_is_Willin)\ **Post date:** [February 22, 2011, 7:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/masturbating-while-breastfeeding/572191/29 "2011-02-22T07:30:43Z")
Jerking off while using a baby as a sexual stimulus? When does this become pedophilia? ---
**Author:** ![Alan\_Smithee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/2acd7d/32.png) [@Alan\_Smithee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alan_Smithee)\ **Post date:** [February 22, 2011, 7:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/masturbating-while-breastfeeding/572191/30 "2011-02-22T07:45:07Z")
If you’re disturbed by it, it’s disturbing. I can’t argue with that. I just don’t care unless there is potential for actual harm. I’ve admitted that there _could_ be that potential, but based on the description of the article, I’m not convinced there actually is such potential. The question in the OP is whether this crosses a boundary, but what boundary is in question is not clear. It clearly crosses a personal comfort boundary for a lot of people. I’m not convinced it does any measurable harm, though, and one of my basic rules for living is that I don’t tell people to stop doing something (especially in the bedroom) unless it either involves me or produces some detectable harm to someone. Like I said, I’m a strict consequentialist. “Eww!” might be a compelling aesthetic argument, but it’s not a moral argument. ---
**Author:** ![Yorikke](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/yorikke/32/4335_2.png) [@Yorikke](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Yorikke)\ **Post date:** [February 22, 2011, 8:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/masturbating-while-breastfeeding/572191/31 "2011-02-22T08:16:08Z")
That is fucking disgusting, and I browse 4chan /b/ regularly. Joe ---
**Author:** ![Girl\_From\_Mars](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/3da27b/32.png) [@Girl\_From\_Mars](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Girl_From_Mars)\ **Post date:** [February 22, 2011, 8:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/masturbating-while-breastfeeding/572191/32 "2011-02-22T08:30:30Z")
> [@Alan\_Smithee](#): > > If you’re disturbed by it, it’s disturbing. I can’t argue with that. I just don’t care unless there is potential for actual harm. I’ve admitted that there _could_ be that potential, but based on the description of the article, I’m not convinced there actually is such potential. > > The question in the OP is whether this crosses a boundary, but what boundary is in question is not clear. It clearly crosses a personal comfort boundary for a lot of people. I’m not convinced it does any measurable harm, though, and one of my basic rules for living is that I don’t tell people to stop doing something (especially in the bedroom) unless it either involves me or produces some detectable harm to someone. > > Like I said, I’m a strict consequentialist. “Eww!” might be a compelling aesthetic argument, but it’s not a moral argument. I think the thing is that breastfeeding is stimulating - after you get over the hump of the blisters and the pain and the… well 6 weeks later and beyond it’s quite a nice feeling. Not sexual, but it generally feels quite good. So then encouraging the feeling of that to enhance masturbation changes the breastfeeding stimulus from nice and nurturing and bonding into something sexual. And that is where it crosses the line into totally icky. ---
**Author:** ![BigBertha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/d78d45/32.png) [@BigBertha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BigBertha)\ **Post date:** [February 22, 2011, 8:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/masturbating-while-breastfeeding/572191/33 "2011-02-22T08:31:20Z")
I’m just trying to figure how a woman can be in the mood for sex right after childbirth. It took me a few months to even think about wanting to. Hell, I bled for 6 weeks. ---
**Author:** ![gladtobeblazed](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/85f322/32.png) [@gladtobeblazed](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gladtobeblazed)\ **Post date:** [February 22, 2011, 9:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/masturbating-while-breastfeeding/572191/34 "2011-02-22T09:13:24Z")
It seems to me that she is exploiting the child for her own sexual pleasure. Disturbing and possibly criminal, she should be investigated by the police. ---
**Author:** ![TokyoBayer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tokyobayer/32/13989_2.png) [@TokyoBayer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TokyoBayer)\ **Post date:** [February 22, 2011, 11:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/masturbating-while-breastfeeding/572191/35 "2011-02-22T11:20:15Z")
At least this we know the answer to the burning question of what happens when you outsource your articles to junior high school boys. ---
**Author:** ![Southern\_Yankee](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/southern_yankee/32/2800_2.png) [@Southern\_Yankee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Southern_Yankee)\ **Post date:** [February 22, 2011, 12:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/masturbating-while-breastfeeding/572191/36 "2011-02-22T12:43:11Z")
> [@MeanOldLady](#): > > … Do not use your baby to help wank yourself off. That would be the greatest sig line evah. ---
**Author:** ![bengangmo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/50afbb/32.png) [@bengangmo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bengangmo)\ **Post date:** [February 22, 2011, 12:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/masturbating-while-breastfeeding/572191/37 "2011-02-22T12:50:22Z")
> [@MeanOldLady](#): > > WTF? > > No. Fuck that. No. You don’t fucking jerk off with your goddamn baby in your hand. No. Bloody hell woman, the original info and image was bad enough - putting it like this really did make me run for the brain bleach…all those bad bad baby jokes just leapt into my. Thanks for nothing ---
**Author:** ![The\_Jay](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/b77776/32.png) [@The\_Jay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Jay)\ **Post date:** [February 22, 2011, 1:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/masturbating-while-breastfeeding/572191/38 "2011-02-22T13:11:34Z")
Just chiming in to say “fucking disgusting”. ---
**Author:** ![bengangmo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/50afbb/32.png) [@bengangmo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bengangmo)\ **Post date:** [February 22, 2011, 1:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/masturbating-while-breastfeeding/572191/39 "2011-02-22T13:26:07Z")
If mummy gets off while baby is feeding, is baby still considered a virgin? ---
**Author:** ![Heart\_of\_Dorkness](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/4bbf92/32.png) [@Heart\_of\_Dorkness](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Heart_of_Dorkness)\ **Post date:** [February 22, 2011, 1:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/masturbating-while-breastfeeding/572191/40 "2011-02-22T13:40:50Z")
Oh, HELL no. Eighty kinds of **HELL. NO.** And not only HELL NO, but also, this is basically [my nightmare](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showpost.php?p=12593981&postcount=70). I’m thrilled and relieved beyond belief that I can breastfeed \*without \*feeling arousal, and here she is _trying_ to make it happen. And as for potential for actual harm (aside from the fact that the kid _will_ read this eventually), I’d argue that encouraging the ability to view one’s own newborn as a sexual aid - to depersonalize it for her own fun and enjoyment - is harmful to the mother’s relationship with that child. Things that should go without saying: Your baby is not a dildo. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/masturbating-while-breastfeeding/572191.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/masturbating-while-breastfeeding/572191.md?page=3)