# May Texas blossom with dildos!
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/may-texas-blossom-with-dildos/437611
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
**Created:** [February 14, 2008, 4:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/may-texas-blossom-with-dildos/437611 "2008-02-14T16:43:45Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 1
### Author:  [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)
#### Post date: [February 14, 2008, 4:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/may-texas-blossom-with-dildos/437611/1 "2008-02-14T16:43:45Z")
[Link.](http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,330641,00.html)
The 5th U.S. Circuit Court of Appeals just overturned Texas’ law against dildo sales.
Sometimes the punchlines just write themselves. 😃
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### Author:  [@lieu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lieu)
#### Post date: [February 14, 2008, 4:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/may-texas-blossom-with-dildos/437611/2 "2008-02-14T16:55:54Z")
I had no idea you couldn’t sell them. Still, they’re already pretty much everywhere here, at least the nine-banded variety. You see 'em crossing the road all the time and, hard of hearing, often times they’ll jump up right in front of your car and put put a hole in your grill. Cute little fuckers, actually.
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### Author:  [@Telperien](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Telperien)
#### Post date: [February 14, 2008, 5:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/may-texas-blossom-with-dildos/437611/3 "2008-02-14T17:02:13Z")
Armadildos, hee hee!
I now have a mental image of various sex toys along the highway, among the flowers.
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### Author:  [@pravnik](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pravnik)
#### Post date: [February 14, 2008, 5:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/may-texas-blossom-with-dildos/437611/4 "2008-02-14T17:31:28Z")
Right in time for Valentine’s day, too! Huzzah! I’m taking the rest of the day off!
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### Author:  [@bannerrefugee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bannerrefugee)
#### Post date: [February 14, 2008, 5:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/may-texas-blossom-with-dildos/437611/5 "2008-02-14T17:35:37Z")
Good news, cause \*\*everything \*\* is bigger in Texas
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### Author:  [@Omegaman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Omegaman)
#### Post date: [February 14, 2008, 5:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/may-texas-blossom-with-dildos/437611/6 "2008-02-14T17:36:26Z")
Is it going to be like 2 cars in every garage, a chicken in every pot and a dildo in every butt?
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### Author:  [@A\_Priori\_Tea](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/A_Priori_Tea)
#### Post date: [February 14, 2008, 5:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/may-texas-blossom-with-dildos/437611/7 "2008-02-14T17:38:06Z")
Punchlines aside, that’s AWESOME! It’ll make things a lot easier on some very good retailers (not to mention their customers) in TX. Maybe I should send all my favorite stores a “Congratulations” e-card. 😃 Not to mention the precedent set is a good one - any step towards getting the government out of my crotch is a good step.
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### Author:  [@mmouse9799](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mmouse9799)
#### Post date: [February 14, 2008, 5:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/may-texas-blossom-with-dildos/437611/8 "2008-02-14T17:39:05Z")
congrats to the Texans! Is this law still on the books in Ohio? Last time I knew it was.
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### Author:  [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)
#### Post date: [February 14, 2008, 5:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/may-texas-blossom-with-dildos/437611/9 "2008-02-14T17:43:09Z")
The Yellow Texas Dildo
Can be sold legally.
And I am going to buy one
Because I am horny.
No longer have to worry
That I’ll end up in jail.
The Yellow Texas Dildo
May orgasms never fail.
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### Author:  [@OneCentStamp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OneCentStamp)
#### Post date: [February 14, 2008, 5:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/may-texas-blossom-with-dildos/437611/10 "2008-02-14T17:46:15Z")
[QUOTE=lieu]
Still, they’re already pretty much everywhere here, at least the nine-banded variety.
[/QUOTE]
_“Banded for her pleasure…ewwwwwwwww.”_ – Garth Algar
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### Author:  [@CalMeacham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CalMeacham)
#### Post date: [February 14, 2008, 6:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/may-texas-blossom-with-dildos/437611/11 "2008-02-14T18:22:35Z")
Molly Ivins had a hilarious column about this stuff years ago. Evidently possession of such obscene devices could get you in trouble. But you had to have some specific number – six or more, I think, before it brought down severe consequences. "If you had five or fewer,’ Molly wrote, “You are a mere Enthusiast.”
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### Author:  [@Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Qadgop_the_Mercotan)
#### Post date: [February 14, 2008, 7:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/may-texas-blossom-with-dildos/437611/12 "2008-02-14T19:22:37Z")
This movie: [Passion & Power](http://www.technologyoforgasm.com/) chronicles (among other things) the prosecution of a Texas woman for selling vibrators at her “schtupperware” parties for women.
Good news for normal Texas women, but a bit too late for this gal…
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### Author:  [@Tenar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tenar)
#### Post date: [February 15, 2008, 1:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/may-texas-blossom-with-dildos/437611/13 "2008-02-15T01:24:03Z")
[QUOTE=lieu]
I had no idea you couldn’t sell them. Still, they’re already pretty much everywhere here, at least the nine-banded variety. You see 'em crossing the road all the time and, hard of hearing, often times they’ll jump up right in front of your car and put put a hole in your grill. Cute little fuckers, actually.
[/QUOTE]
You DO know you can get leprosy from those things, right? You might want to keep them away from your nether regions.
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### Author:  [@Otto](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Otto)
#### Post date: [February 15, 2008, 1:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/may-texas-blossom-with-dildos/437611/14 "2008-02-15T01:54:40Z")
The Eleventh Circuit has ruled [the opposite way](http://blog.babeland.com/2007/02/15/no-dildos-for-alabama/). I for one am looking forward to a SCOTUS appeal complete with oral argument.
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### Author:  [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)
#### Post date: [February 15, 2008, 2:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/may-texas-blossom-with-dildos/437611/15 "2008-02-15T02:00:12Z")
[QUOTE=Otto]
The Eleventh Circuit has ruled [the opposite way](http://blog.babeland.com/2007/02/15/no-dildos-for-alabama/). I for one am looking forward to a SCOTUS appeal complete with oral argument.
[/QUOTE]
Let it be known, just for that case, the court shall be known as SCROTUS. Let’s keep it all below the belt, please.
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### Author:  [@detop](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/detop)
#### Post date: [February 15, 2008, 2:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/may-texas-blossom-with-dildos/437611/16 "2008-02-15T02:04:26Z")
[QUOTE=Boyo Jim]
Let it be known, just for that case, the court shall be known as SCROTUS. Let’s keep it all below the belt, please.
[/QUOTE]
Yeah, and the argument could either be oral or anal 😛
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### Author:  [@Rick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rick)
#### Post date: [February 15, 2008, 2:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/may-texas-blossom-with-dildos/437611/17 "2008-02-15T02:27:42Z")
[TV ad about to be run on Texas TV](http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=-9160421032335997814&q=its+dildo&total=234&start=0&num=10&so=0&type=search&plindex=1)
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### Author:  [@detop](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/detop)
#### Post date: [February 17, 2008, 12:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/may-texas-blossom-with-dildos/437611/18 "2008-02-17T00:00:50Z")
Damn you to heck **Rick** for posting that link ! Now I can’t remove that jingle from my head.
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### Author:  [@Oslo\_Ostragoth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Oslo_Ostragoth)
#### Post date: [February 17, 2008, 12:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/may-texas-blossom-with-dildos/437611/19 "2008-02-17T00:05:44Z")
Obligatory [link](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=266235&page=1&pp=50).
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### Author:  [@Annie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie)
#### Post date: [February 17, 2008, 12:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/may-texas-blossom-with-dildos/437611/20 "2008-02-17T00:39:14Z")
[QUOTE=CalMeacham]
Molly Ivins had a hilarious column about this stuff years ago. Evidently possession of such obscene devices could get you in trouble. But you had to have some specific number – six or more, I think, before it brought down severe consequences. "If you had five or fewer,’ Molly wrote, “You are a mere Enthusiast.”
[/QUOTE]
[Now, in video!](http://youtube.com/watch?v=GaUl6x1YXpg) NSFW, because of a table full of dills.