# Mayday! Mayday! (minirants!) **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [May 1, 2018, 2:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mayday-mayday-minirants/813409 "2018-05-01T14:47:53Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 14
**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\ **Post date:** [May 20, 2018, 1:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mayday-mayday-minirants/813409/261 "2018-05-20T01:59:17Z")
> [@Jennshark](#): > > I’m sorry to hear this, Chefguy. I’ve a brother who has done three rehab stints. Miraculously, he’s kept hold of his family, job, and house through it all. He’s mainly an alcoholic with a smattering of speed or whatever is in vogue with construction workers these days. > > I can’t even imagine the pain of seeing one’s child go through this over and over. He’s running a 103 fever from sepsis that they are having difficulty getting down, and had to intubate him because his breathing was erratic. His arms are swollen and there is bruising. Now I hear they’re giving him platelets to try to thicken his blood. ---
**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\ **Post date:** [May 20, 2018, 4:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mayday-mayday-minirants/813409/262 "2018-05-20T04:29:10Z")
> [@Beckdawrek](#): > > I don’t think the world should accommodate me at all. I would think she would want her extended family to see it live, She is American, after all. I have no dog in the fight. Why? Most people who don’t attend a wedding do not get to see it live. Having it at a time that would be inconvenient for the physical guests so someone can see it conveniently over the telly is… about as polite as inviting someone and requiring them to pay. ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [May 20, 2018, 5:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mayday-mayday-minirants/813409/263 "2018-05-20T05:31:24Z")
> [@Nava](#): > > Why? Most people who don’t attend a wedding do not get to see it live. Having it at a time that would be inconvenient for the physical guests so someone can see it conveniently over the telly is… > > about as polite as inviting someone and requiring them to pay. What’s inconvenient about a evening wedding. My own wedding was in the evening. But, whatever. It doesn’t really matter. I was lamenting, at the start of this at the weird time all the stations in the US were advertising the coverage to begin at 4am. Seemed strange to me. I knew full well they weren’t gonna call me for my input or advise. But it’s not that big of a deal. It’s all over but the crying. ---
**Author:** ![Jennshark](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/8e8cbc/32.png) [@Jennshark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jennshark)\ **Post date:** [May 20, 2018, 1:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mayday-mayday-minirants/813409/264 "2018-05-20T13:57:20Z")
> [@Chefguy](#): > > He’s running a 103 fever from sepsis that they are having difficulty getting down, and had to intubate him because his breathing was erratic. His arms are swollen and there is bruising. Now I hear they’re giving him platelets to try to thicken his blood. This sounds awful – how is he doing today? How are you? ---
**Author:** ![purplehorseshoe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/purplehorseshoe/32/2996_2.png) [@purplehorseshoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/purplehorseshoe)\ **Post date:** [May 20, 2018, 2:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mayday-mayday-minirants/813409/265 "2018-05-20T14:16:15Z")
Ohgoddammit, I suck at giving gifts. I ordered an I.T. humor t-shirt for my bf’s birthday, and of course, I ordered a size off, because we’re only fucking living together. Went onto Amazon right after he opened his gifts … the return window closed yesterday. Mere hours after he unwrapped it. ---
**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\ **Post date:** [May 20, 2018, 2:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mayday-mayday-minirants/813409/266 "2018-05-20T14:24:57Z")
> [@Jennshark](#): > > This sounds awful – how is he doing today? How are you? Just heard from my daughter. She says the infection is from “strep type A”. His fever is down to 100.9, but his heart rate is still accelerated and they’ve got him on BP meds. Also anxiety meds. He’s been off the alcohol withdrawal meds for about 12 hours. As for how I am, I’m mad as hell that he’s putting the family through this yet again. I’m supposed to go out there next week, but I’m not sure I can be civil to the guy at this point. ---
**Author:** ![Brown\_Eyed\_Girl](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/brown_eyed_girl/32/3574_2.png) [@Brown\_Eyed\_Girl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Brown_Eyed_Girl)\ **Post date:** [May 20, 2018, 4:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mayday-mayday-minirants/813409/267 "2018-05-20T16:14:09Z")
> [@purplehorseshoe](#): > > Ohgoddammit, I suck at giving gifts. I ordered an I.T. humor t-shirt for my bf’s birthday, and of course, I ordered a size off, because we’re only fucking living together. Went onto Amazon right after he opened his gifts … the return window closed yesterday. Mere hours after he unwrapped it. If it came from Amazon vs. a third party seller on Amazon, you may have luck calling customer service and explaining the problem. There was another thread around here somewhere extolling the virtues of Amazon’s customer service with regard to exchanges/returns. ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [May 20, 2018, 4:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mayday-mayday-minirants/813409/268 "2018-05-20T16:39:29Z")
Yeo, email Amazon. They are great about returns. ---
**Author:** ![digs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/digs/32/14889_2.png) [@digs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/digs)\ **Post date:** [May 20, 2018, 4:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mayday-mayday-minirants/813409/269 "2018-05-20T16:43:13Z")
> [@purplehorseshoe](#): > > Ohgoddammit, I suck at giving gifts. I ordered an I.T. humor t-shirt for my bf’s birthday, and of course, I ordered a size off, because we’re only fucking living together. Went onto Amazon right after he opened his gifts … the return window closed yesterday. Mere hours after he unwrapped it. I think it’s BF’s chance to lose a few pounds\*. Or bulk up, if it’s too large. \*I’ve got a stack of t-shirts I’ve “outgrown”. I’m keeping them – they’ll be my reward for someday getting back to Normal Size. Well, t-shirts and a donut and a Coke Slurpee… and a whole pizza… ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [May 20, 2018, 6:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mayday-mayday-minirants/813409/270 "2018-05-20T18:07:58Z")
> [@Chefguy](#): > > \ > As for how I am, I’m mad as hell that he’s putting the family through this yet again. I’m supposed to go out there next week, but I’m not sure I can be civil to the guy at this point. Your adult child killing themselves slowly with addiction (and putting their family through hell repeatedly) isn’t a mini-rant, it’s a maxi-rant! I’m also very sorry you’re all going through this; there are no good answers here. ---
**Author:** ![Catamount](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/catamount/32/2840_2.png) [@Catamount](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Catamount)\ **Post date:** [May 20, 2018, 7:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mayday-mayday-minirants/813409/271 "2018-05-20T19:09:50Z")
Last Christmas my sisters appointed me Family Archivist and gave me three boxes of photos to sort and scan. Today as I was sorting through random folders of papers, I found my mom’s death certificate. That severely dented my day. I was in a good mood before that. On the plus side, I only have half a box of random photos left to go through before I start scanning. ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [May 20, 2018, 7:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mayday-mayday-minirants/813409/272 "2018-05-20T19:24:25Z")
I remember the day my Daddy’s death certificate came in the mail. Seriously ruined my week. He died a few years ago and I am still trying to get courage enough to go through pictures and papers. Someday I will. ---
**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\ **Post date:** [May 20, 2018, 9:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mayday-mayday-minirants/813409/273 "2018-05-20T21:49:14Z")
The magazine people are at it again. They drop off these young black folks in the neighborhood who have been coached to look vulnerable and sincere to play on white guilt, and to talk nonstop to keep you from saying “no”. I’ve dealt with this scam before and just point to the “No Solicitors” sign on the mailbox. I’d really like to have a word with the people who put them up to it. ---
**Author:** ![Chimera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/8e8cbc/32.png) [@Chimera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chimera)\ **Post date:** [May 20, 2018, 9:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mayday-mayday-minirants/813409/274 "2018-05-20T21:52:33Z")
There’s a reason I desire the room I live in to be far away from the front door and then never answer said door unless I know someone is coming over. Then again, when I lived in my own house, I followed the **Minnesota Rule of Company**. Friends and Family don’t knock on the front door. They come to the back door. ---
**Author:** ![Hilarity\_N.Suze](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hilarity_n.suze/32/6223_2.png) [@Hilarity\_N.Suze](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hilarity_N.Suze)\ **Post date:** [May 20, 2018, 10:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mayday-mayday-minirants/813409/275 "2018-05-20T22:23:37Z")
I was just driving along and happened to glance at my speedometer. Holy shit I’m doing 70 in a 40mh zone! It doesn’t seem like I’m going that fast, in fact people are passing me…Oh. Wait. My car has suddenly decided it’s French, or something, and is now giving me the speed in kilometers. And I almost had a wreck trying to figure out how to change it back. Some days I wish I had just kept my first car in good repair. It would be a classic today, and none of this computer nonsense. ---
**Author:** ![Hilarity\_N.Suze](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hilarity_n.suze/32/6223_2.png) [@Hilarity\_N.Suze](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hilarity_N.Suze)\ **Post date:** [May 20, 2018, 10:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mayday-mayday-minirants/813409/276 "2018-05-20T22:25:11Z")
> [@Chefguy](#): > > The magazine people are at it again. They drop off these young black folks in the neighborhood who have been coached to look vulnerable and sincere to play on white guilt, and to talk nonstop to keep you from saying “no”. I’ve dealt with this scam before and just point to the “No Solicitors” sign on the mailbox. I’d really like to have a word with the people who put them up to it. Ask the kids if they’ve seen any money yet. Because actually I think they are vulnerable and sincere, and they’re also usually a long way from home and pretty dependent on the people who brought them there. ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [May 20, 2018, 10:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mayday-mayday-minirants/813409/277 "2018-05-20T22:40:13Z")
Reason #128 I don’t live where other people live. ---
**Author:** ![Jackmannii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jackmannii/32/311_2.png) [@Jackmannii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jackmannii)\ **Post date:** [May 20, 2018, 10:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mayday-mayday-minirants/813409/278 "2018-05-20T22:54:18Z")
So I get a college fundraising appeal disguised as a class letter, (ghost)written by a classmate whom I don’t recall. He starts out by relating the tale of a man traveling on his donkey who becomes weary (oddly enough it’s the guy and not the donkey who needs a rest) and stops to observe a little old man planting a carob tree. Our traveling nitwit asks the old man how soon the tree will bear fruit and is told “70 years”. He asks the old man (rather snottily in my view) if he thinks he’ll live another 70 years to eat the fruit and is told “I don’t know who’s a bigger ass, you or the animal you rode in on. I’ll plant the fucking tree if I want.” No, supposedly the old man patiently explains that he’s planting it on behalf of his children and grandchildren. You may be able to see where this is going. So I responded that since I have no children or grandchildren, never mind any dumb enough to apply to this school, I’m instead donating money to the Nature Conservancy to plant a shitload of trees. No, I thought about saying that but instead described a scene from the musical _Zorba!_. Zorba the Greek, who’s an Official Wild and Crazy Guy, tells of encountering a little old man planting a tree. The old man says that he lives like he’ll never die. Zorba on the other hand grins broadly, throws out his arms and shouts “Me - I live like I’ll die ANY MINUTE!!!” And then everyone starts dancing the bazouki, or whatever. Sooner or later the college is bound to stop sending me these mailings. \*I donate money to the Nature Conservancy, partly because they don’t mail me fundraising appeals that are this stupid. ---
**Author:** ![Chimera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/8e8cbc/32.png) [@Chimera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chimera)\ **Post date:** [May 21, 2018, 12:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mayday-mayday-minirants/813409/279 "2018-05-21T00:24:58Z")
Colleges get plenty of money from rich assholes who want their names on things. That isn’t ‘planting a tree’, that’s self-aggrandizement and bragging rights. You’re helping plant trees. Good on ya! ---
**Author:** ![digs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/digs/32/14889_2.png) [@digs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/digs)\ **Post date:** [May 21, 2018, 12:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mayday-mayday-minirants/813409/280 "2018-05-21T00:29:24Z")
I silently put up with these mailings from my school, just ignoring them. Until they had Mike Pence speak at graduation. Now I’m going to demand to be stricken from all their mailing and alumni lists. As soon as I figure out what to say – I wanted to just write “Pence? Ewwww…” I’m thinking of referring to him as Vice-Perp Pence. > [@Hilarity\_N.Suze](#): > > Some days I wish I had just kept my first car in good repair. It would be a classic today, and none of this computer nonsense. Back when I was going to college, I was working on the OG Volkswagen Bugs. I really miss cars that were 100% mechanical. Not sure I could match wits with computerized cars. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mayday-mayday-minirants/813409.md?page=13) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mayday-mayday-minirants/813409.md?page=15)