# ME-The Movie

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/me-the-movie/2824>\
**Category:** Factual Questions\
**Created:** [August 25, 1999, 2:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/me-the-movie/2824 "1999-08-25T02:45:00Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 6\
**Page:** 2

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**Author:** ![DrFidelius](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/drfidelius/32/3447_2.png) [@DrFidelius](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DrFidelius)\
**Post date:** [August 25, 1999, 4:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/me-the-movie/2824/21 "1999-08-25T16:23:00Z")

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## Sean Connery, if he puts on about thirty pounds…

Dr. Fidelius, Charlatan  
Associate Curator Anomalous Paleontology, Miskatonic University  
“There’s a Seeker born every minute.”

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**Author:** ![system](https://global.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/original/2X/e/e489c3b7d8fce19c4b355dd4fc3f88cc39c34b87.png) [@system](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/system)\
**Post date:** [August 25, 1999, 4:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/me-the-movie/2824/22 "1999-08-25T16:46:00Z")

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Steven Wright, definitely. 😛

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**Author:** ![Ukulele\_Ike](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/df788c/32.png) [@Ukulele\_Ike](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ukulele_Ike)\
**Post date:** [August 26, 1999, 5:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/me-the-movie/2824/23 "1999-08-26T05:16:00Z")

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Not to sound superficial, but I think looks count as much as attitude in this sort of thing. Why the hell did Donald O’Connor get the title role in THE BUSTER KEATON STORY?

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Uke

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**Author:** ![ChrisCTP](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e36b37/32.png) [@ChrisCTP](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ChrisCTP)\
**Post date:** [August 26, 1999, 5:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/me-the-movie/2824/24 "1999-08-26T05:17:00Z")

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Hafta be Janeane Garofalo for me…

Slythe, if Jeff Goldblum is playing you, I want to be your date at the premiere. Yum.

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Veni, Vidi, Visa … I came, I saw, I bought.

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**Author:** ![Pete](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/3ab097/32.png) [@Pete](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pete)\
**Post date:** [August 26, 1999, 5:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/me-the-movie/2824/25 "1999-08-26T05:40:00Z")

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Stevie Rave, you really better hope you don’t look like Matt Damon from the educational series “Voyage of the Mimi.”

(He was about 9 years old)

Like I said, Jack Nicholson would play me for attitude. Well, actually, that’s just for the cool scenes. The rest of the time, I’d pick Rowan Atkinson (Mr. Bean) to play me in the many silly scenes.

If for looks, it would have to be, ahem, Brad Pitt. Okay, okay, maybe Gilbert Godfried.

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I don’t know who first said “everyone’s a critic,” but I think it’s a really stupid saying.

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**Author:** ![Nickrz](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/bbce88/32.png) [@Nickrz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nickrz)\
**Post date:** [August 25, 1999, 8:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/me-the-movie/2824/26 "1999-08-25T20:04:00Z")

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Hate to say it, folks - MPSIMS.

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