# Melin has been banned **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [March 20, 2000, 5:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/melin-has-been-banned/4855 "2000-03-20T05:56:00Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 12
**Author:** ![SqrlCub](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ea5d25/32.png) [@SqrlCub](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SqrlCub)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2000, 8:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/melin-has-been-banned/4855/221 "2000-03-22T20:40:00Z")
I must state again that Ultress’s sig is appropriate here. HUGS! Sqrl PS. I stopped reading this thread, it was tiring. I just thought I may have something useful to add. (I did a search for her and found her name here… I love ctrl f) * * * [SqrlCub’s Arizona Adventure](http://boards.straightdope.com/ubb/Forum4/HTML/005351.html) ---
**Author:** ![douglips](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e68b1a/32.png) [@douglips](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/douglips)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2000, 8:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/melin-has-been-banned/4855/222 "2000-03-22T20:43:00Z")
Majormd writes: > [@](#): > > To those who would suggest that other means of redress should have been attempted first, I will simply point you to the stonewalling response from Ed & a moderator when apologies were called for in posts & e-mails last October/November regarding another instance of defamatory comments: > [http://boards.straightdope.com/ubb/Forum3/HTML/003035.html](http://boards.straightdope.com/ubb/Forum3/HTML/003035.html) (Nickrz’s post ~10th in the thread) I think this is a very good example, and not for what you would like it to demonstrate. Nickrz was way out of line, and your responses to him were completely reasonable - you were hurt, and justifiably so. Nowhere in that thread do you indicate that you would consider suing anyone, let alone the Reader, because of a totally inappropriate remark from Nickrz, you just indicated how rude and inappropriate it was of him. Very classy. Finally, after much ballyhooing about by other people, you indicate that you’d like the conversation to stop and that you don’t expect an apology. Your actions, Sue, were completely reasonable. Now let me quote moriah, from that very same thread: > [@](#): > > Melin, your self-appointed job as administration watchdog is getting old real fast. You may be totally justified in feeling angry over an injustice you may have actually received at the hands of the Board. I don’t know all the details to judge, and I don’t want to know. I do know that you take the opportunity to charge in guns blazing to attack the administration every chance you get. You just did here to Jill and David what you criticize Nick for doing to Sue, and you know what that is called. And I won’t even go into your championing of Contestant #3’s cause – it’s pathetic. You’re wearing your vindictiveness on your sleeve. Melin posted **fifteen kajillion times** asking Nickrz for an apology, and making very veiled references to it being grounds for a suit. For me, after I’ve asked someone for an apology once or twice, I realize they aren’t going to give one and I **give up**. I may remember that the next time they ask for a favor, but I stop bitching about it. Melin just never seemed to let go of anything. When Libertarian first started posting, it became a joke that wherever he went he would bring libertarianism into the discussion. Someone (I forget who) compared him to the character in the Monty Python movie - “'elp, 'elp, I’m being repressed!”. That was one microMelin worth of tenacity on Lib’s part. Quite often it seemed like everywhere she went, if someone from a past scuffle with her posted she’d make a snide comment about the past. It comes down to bandwidth. Do you really think Ed has the time to deal with 500 emails a day from one or two people who are constantly being offended? I have not even once had to send a message to a moderator or SDStaff regarding a problem I needed resolved - I’ve only sent things like “Hey, xyz posted to the thread you have been following and he sucks, thought you might be interested” or “Thanks for your help with situation Y in thread Z.” In contrast, how many times did Ed personally have to intervene in Melin’s posting life? What is he going to do, hire a full time staff person whose job it is to hold Melin’s hand? It doesn’t matter that Melin posted witty, content rich material, or that she was the left-coast siamese attack puppet, or that she was a phenomenal woman, bitch corporate lawyer. What matters is that she made herself a pain in the butt to the administration for a very long time. The squeaky wheel does indeed get the grease. But eventually, you get tired of wielding the grease gun and the squeaky wheel gets replaced. ---
**Author:** ![jab1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ee7513/32.png) [@jab1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jab1)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2000, 10:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/melin-has-been-banned/4855/223 "2000-03-22T22:10:00Z")
> [@](#): > > Originally posted by Ed Zotti: > **Your garden variety flame war, no prob. However, if it starts to get really ugly, we will warn the participants to stop.** Does that mean **Freedom** and I can continue to whip each other? 🙂 (DISCLAIAMER: I haven’t checked the “Anti-Gun Idiots” thread lately.) * * * When all else fails, ask Cecil. ---
**Author:** ![Yue\_Han](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/eada6e/32.png) [@Yue\_Han](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Yue_Han)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2000, 10:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/melin-has-been-banned/4855/224 "2000-03-22T22:17:00Z")
I’d like to apologize to Ed and MajorMD both for the comment “crazy bitch”. Immediately after I posted it I regretted it. Kellibelli was a friend of mine, and this pissed me off. –John * * * 'Twis brillig, and the slithy toves Did gyre and gymble in the wabe. Mimsy were the borogroves, And the momeraths outgrabe. ---
**Author:** ![Liberal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/848f3c/32.png) [@Liberal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Liberal)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2000, 10:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/melin-has-been-banned/4855/225 "2000-03-22T22:24:00Z")
I suppose it’s time for me to weigh in. Relax. This won’t require an “Ethics of Banning Melin” thread. First things first. **Yue Han** , I have always been wanting to say to you, since the first time I ever had the pleasure of reading one of your posts, that I am greatly impressed with you. As I recall, you are about sixteen or so, but I just want you to know that I think you are a **man** , a _good_ man, with an inherent sense of honor and fairness, a profound maturity, and very, very sharp intellect. And um, what was it? … Oh, yeah. It looks like Melin made a mistake, has apologized for it, is banned, and won’t be back. It looks like Ed has what David calls “thick skin”, a trait that I am working to acquire. As I try to empathize in this situation, I see Melin kind of saying, “Damned hindsight! I wish I’d handled that differently,” shrugging her shoulders, and getting on with her life. I see Ed kind of going, “Sigh. This too will pass. We just need to tighten things up a bit.” I don’t think Ed coerced or defrauded Melin. ---
**Author:** ![evilbeth](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/evilbeth/32/2268_2.png) [@evilbeth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/evilbeth)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2000, 10:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/melin-has-been-banned/4855/226 "2000-03-22T22:27:00Z")
> [@](#): > > Originally posted by StoryTyler: > I’m curious if anyone else (besides Melin) has received similar missives from this particular moderator on this particular subject. Hard to believe I’m the _only_ one receiving snide, unprovoked comments via email… > > Anyone? Anyone? Bueller? I only post again to this thread (in the interest of fighting ignorance) to confirm that I also belong to the illustrious group of e-mail recipients. I now go back to being a non-“Melin thread”-participating member. * * * I always try to do things in chronological order. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Peyote\_Coyote](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/5f8ce5/32.png) [@The\_Peyote\_Coyote](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Peyote_Coyote)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2000, 10:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/melin-has-been-banned/4855/227 "2000-03-22T22:28:00Z")
Not that I think anybody gives a rat’s ass, but I side with Ed and the administrators on this one. This is by far one of the best places, if not the best, on the Web; hell, reading the posts here has greatly diminished my time on the porn sites. That is due to the quality of posters and the work of the moderators and administrators. To echo some other posters, if you don’t like the work they do, go to some other sites. To the pro-Melin clique: Yes, I did read her explanation, but quit halfway through when I came to the conclusion she was an ambulance-chaser. For several months, she had persisted in provoking the admins and mods, and they, being humans, finally got tired of it. I have no sympathy for people who continually dance around with their dukes up and then whine when someone slugs them. ---
**Author:** ![Demo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/demo/32/8472_2.png) [@Demo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Demo)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2000, 10:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/melin-has-been-banned/4855/228 "2000-03-22T22:54:00Z")
This is the first time I’ve posted to this thread because, frankly, it took me this long to read all of the pertinent material. I won’t sit and agree or disagree with anyone, but here’s my take: I think this place is great. I like that we can have a relationship with the admin/mods and not just play in their yard. As guests, we are asked to “play nice”. We can usually do that while still voicing our opinions and defending our rights. But there is such a thing as taking it too far. If the board becomes a place where you can’t exist on without endless conflict, and when the management specifically tells you to knock it off, you either shut up or get out. My personal opinion is that Melin had more than her fair share of warnings and kept up the ball biting to the point of pissing people off who had previously had the fortitude to_tolerate_ her bullshit. Ed and company’s decision was well founded. Personally, at the first suggestion of litigation, I would have tossed her out on her ass. I respect those who have headed towards “greener pastures”, but don’t _understand_ them either(someone said that earlier). You can call someone who agrees with the administration a kiss ass all you want, but it’s a pitiful excuse for your defense. Oh, and **Rysdad** , get a clue! * * * Whether you’re fat or slim bubble your ting. Fellas if you need help, use ginseng. –Wyclef Jean ---
**Author:** ![billehunt](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/c37758/32.png) [@billehunt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/billehunt)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2000, 11:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/melin-has-been-banned/4855/229 "2000-03-22T23:59:00Z")
I think there’s great irony here in that Melin was concerned about the perceived defamation of her character and it’s impact on her in the business world, and took actions that (to me at least) diminish the quality of her character and greatly diminish the odds that I would do business with her. ---
**Author:** ![Dirty\_Devil](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a3d4f5/32.png) [@Dirty\_Devil](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dirty_Devil)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2000, 12:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/melin-has-been-banned/4855/230 "2000-03-23T00:16:00Z")
Wow. I hadn’t thought about it that way, **billehunt**. Very interesting indeed… ---
**Author:** ![Rysdad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/7cd45c/32.png) [@Rysdad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rysdad)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2000, 1:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/melin-has-been-banned/4855/231 "2000-03-23T01:51:00Z")
> [@](#): > > Originally posted by Democritus: > \*\*You can call someone who agrees with the administration a kiss ass all you want, but it’s a pitiful excuse for your defense. > > Oh, and **Rysdad** , get a clue! > > \*\* Here I was, all set to make nice, and I see this. To quote Ed, “Kiss my ass.” I’m not trying to defend myself from you nor anyone else, as if I’d ever need to. Demo, your clues are worth as much to me as they cost. Get it? With that said, I’ll address Alphagene in another thread. ---
**Author:** ![\_WAR\_Firesong\_TCA\_1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/_/e495f1/32.png) [@\_WAR\_Firesong\_TCA\_1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/_WAR_Firesong_TCA_1)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2000, 4:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/melin-has-been-banned/4855/232 "2000-03-23T04:28:00Z")
Hey Ed, I can see why you may have found Melin frusterating, since she had a sense of humor(which you apparently LACK). However, I do not think that making her sig line read “sig: censored” is grounds to kick her from the board. ---
**Author:** ![Alphagene](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/8e7dd6/32.png) [@Alphagene](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alphagene)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2000, 4:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/melin-has-been-banned/4855/233 "2000-03-23T04:42:00Z")
…and no matter how heated the debate, no matter how many parties are involved, some schmuck is always like five light-years behind. Hey FireWarBird or whatever, we’re pretty much done, OK? But thanks for dropping in. Better luck next time. Here’s a coupon. * * * **Gypsy** : Tom, I don’t get you. **Tom Servo** : Nobody does. I’m the wind, baby. ---
**Author:** ![system](https://global.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/original/2X/e/e489c3b7d8fce19c4b355dd4fc3f88cc39c34b87.png) [@system](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/system)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2000, 5:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/melin-has-been-banned/4855/234 "2000-03-23T05:24:00Z")
Alphagene posts: > [@](#): > > Sue, I poltely ask that you not use that sig outside the Pit, since it is clearly a “complaint… regarding administration of the SDMB”. > Bringing that disagreement into GQ or GD is inappropriate. Plus it means that regardless of the nature of the OP, I would have to “stay the fuck out of” whatever thread you post in, as per Ursa Major’s recommendation to me. > > You want to continue to fight for your friend, go ahead. But please don’t do it in a forum where responding to your anti-administrative assertions would be inapproproate. and in response to an attempt on my part to deflect this with humor: > [@](#): > > A sig line is part of your post. I’d rather you not drag your crusade all over the whole MB, no matter how noble you perceive it to be. I’m trying to appeal to your reason, not to Official Board Policy. > If you want to announce your feelings to provoke debate and change, keep it where debate is appropriate. If you just want to make a scene, you’re bordering on trolling, which is really something I’d rather not see from you, Sue. > Is all this really worth it? AND > [@](#): > > Ursa, I am clearly not against debate. I just don’t think the debate belongs outside of the Pit. I don’t want to open a thread about Pringles and see someone whine in their sig about Melin. It’s practically a form of witnessing. > > Christ, I asked Sue politely and I get personally insulted in response. Alphagene, I assure you that I find your incessant whining about all the attention Melin is getting as tiresome as you find my posts. Perhaps if you’d see fit to stop short of what 6-8 posts in this this thread, not to mention the whole other 50 post thread YOU started, this would all die down sooner. Just a thought… You can ask as politely as you please, but there’s enough petty rules around here anymore that I simply fail to see why offending your sensibilities should cause me to stop expressing in a non-inflammatory way my very strong feelings on a subject close to my heart. Since multiple other posters can & do witness in their sigs ::shudder:: outside of GD, I think that there must be some sick fascination you have with this whole sad affair to obsess on my sig line so much. ## Whatever. Sue from El Paso Experience is what you get when you didn’t get what you wanted. **UnBan Melin** ---
**Author:** ![system](https://global.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/original/2X/e/e489c3b7d8fce19c4b355dd4fc3f88cc39c34b87.png) [@system](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/system)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2000, 5:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/melin-has-been-banned/4855/235 "2000-03-23T05:44:00Z")
Yue Han posts: > [@](#): > > And MajorMD- despite a disagreement in the past, I once had respect for you. But Melin=Christ?! WTF? Chill out, John. (apology accepted for the non-quoted part, btw) The analogy I meant to draw was one of trumped up charges, regardless of how silly, petty, or remote-from-the-real-crime they were. * * * Sue from El Paso Experience is what you get when you didn’t get what you wanted. **UnBan Melin** ---
**Author:** ![system](https://global.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/original/2X/e/e489c3b7d8fce19c4b355dd4fc3f88cc39c34b87.png) [@system](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/system)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2000, 6:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/melin-has-been-banned/4855/236 "2000-03-23T06:04:00Z")
douglips posts: > [@](#): > > I think this is a very good example, and not for what you would like it to demonstrate. > > Nickrz was way out of line, and your responses to him were completely reasonable - you were hurt, and justifiably so. Nowhere in that thread do you indicate that you would consider suing anyone, let alone the Reader, because of a totally inappropriate remark from Nickrz, you just indicated how rude and inappropriate it was of him. Very classy. Finally, after much ballyhooing about by other people, you indicate that you’d like the conversation to stop and that you don’t expect an apology. > > Your actions, Sue, were completely reasonable. > ::Snipped really NASTY post by Moriah:: > Melin posted fifteen kajillion times asking Nickrz for an apology, and making very veiled references to it being grounds for a suit. For me, after I’ve asked someone for an apology once or twice, I realize they aren’t going to give one and I give up. I may remember that the next time they ask for a favor, but I stop bitching about it. Melin just never seemed to let go of anything. You know, doug, it’s really easy to take the high road & show some class when you have friends like Melin to carry the fight for you. Also, FTR, Nickrz DID apologize. I have no way of knowing what combination of Melin’s tenacity, pressure from other posters, my own further posts in another thread, or behind-the-scenes communications led to the apology. Rightly, or wrongly I credit Melin, and have been continually impressed with her willingness to stand up for other posters who were being targeted for abuse, especially from some of the mods… * * * Sue from El Paso Experience is what you get when you didn’t get what you wanted. **UnBan Melin** ---
**Author:** ![system](https://global.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/original/2X/e/e489c3b7d8fce19c4b355dd4fc3f88cc39c34b87.png) [@system](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/system)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2000, 6:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/melin-has-been-banned/4855/237 "2000-03-23T06:13:00Z")
Oh, and Alpha? You really don’t need to worry that much about opening a thread and finding my offensive sig line there. My posting days here are done. I’ll be patrolling these threads & addressing misrepresentations as I find them, but once this dies down I’m outta here. There’s a couple of requests I’ll honor in GQ, but my heart’s not in it any longer. It’s been fun. But it’s not anymore. It’s time to move on. * * * Sue from El Paso Experience is what you get when you didn’t get what you wanted. **UnBan Melin** ---
**Author:** ![Valerieblaise](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b2d939/32.png) [@Valerieblaise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Valerieblaise)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2000, 8:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/melin-has-been-banned/4855/238 "2000-03-23T08:49:00Z")
> [@](#): > > I’ll be patrolling these threads & addressing misrepresentations as I find them, but once this dies down I’m outta here. Thanks, John. It’s rather touching to see you sticking w/ Ponch after all these years. I’m getting a little misty. The next time my partner (or an online friend, same thing) gets harassed by the “brass” (or the owners of a private internet message board) I’m going to take a bullet for them (or get pissy and stamp my feet a lot - whatever it takes) because sometimes you just have to be willing to make a big sacrifice in the name of justice. And here I childishly thought this board was here as a diversion from everyday life - I guess I just never understood that at the core of it was _all that is objectivity and reason_. I’ve learned so much today. Thanks for showing me the light, Sue’n-to-be-a-Former-Poster. Well, this is so upsetting that I’m going to have to resign from the board. Oh no wait, that’s what a person with no perspective or rationality would do… I suppose I’ll just have to LET THIS GO. ---
**Author:** ![Barbara](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/5f8ce5/32.png) [@Barbara](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Barbara)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2000, 1:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/melin-has-been-banned/4855/239 "2000-03-23T13:56:00Z")
A lot of you don’t know me as I’ve never been active in this group. But I was a “reg” on the SDMB for several years and I know how easy it is to become emotionally involved in these little conflicts. I also figure that many of you really enjoy these message boards. I would like to offer some friendly advice. If you want this forum to continue to exist, chill. Let all of this go and play nice. I’m sure that when the Chicago Reader agreed to host a message board for TSD, they didn’t think there would be much of a downside. Then they got hacked. In addition to having to bear some very real financial expenses to recover their site, I’m guessing that the hacking episode also made them aware of a lot of the potential liabilities associated with the website in general and the message board in particular. Certainly the folks at the Chicago Reader have to be viewing this message board in a less than favorable light after the hacking incident and the whole Melin/lawsuit thing. If I were them, I’d be getting pretty fed up myself right about now. It doesn’t matter who is right or wrong—they have made their decision and if you don’t respect it you should either shut up about it or go elsewhere. This _is_ a moderated forum and if you don’t like that you should avail yourself of one of the many related unmoderated forums so this board can continue to exist for those that don’t have a problem with the level of moderation. Do you really think that Ed has nothing better to do than to write long treatises defending the Chicago Reader’s decision all day? Sheesh, the man has a column to write every week \. Do you think that Ed’s other workload has been lessened just so he can moderate a flame war? Do you think the TSD has the time to respond seriously to every little “so and so called me a dickless wonder and thus ruined my career as a gigolo” whine of every member of this site? Do you think Ed’s employers feel that reading and responding to hundreds of e-mails describing every injustice ever supposedly perpetrated by TSD is a legitimate use of his time? It doesn’t matter if TSD is right or wrong, but it is obvious that a lot of you are making big pains in the asses of yourself in their eyes. You have every right to do so, but it seems to me that they have every right to pull the plug on this board completely if it becomes too big of a thorn in their side. I know you guys are outraged, but don’t pull an LA and get so outraged that you destroy your own neighborhood. * * * Barbara ---
**Author:** ![Flinx](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/e79b87/32.png) [@Flinx](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Flinx)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2000, 3:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/melin-has-been-banned/4855/240 "2000-03-23T15:00:00Z")
Majormd wrote: > [@](#): > > It’s been fun. But it’s not anymore. It’s time to move on. Aw, man! Well, Sue, if you have to leave, you have to leave, but I’ve enjoyed your company and posts very much. Your medical advice has helped me many times, and for that I thank you. Happy trails, I guess. ☹ * * * Lemonade…10 cents Snakes…50 cents [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/melin-has-been-banned/4855.md?page=11) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/melin-has-been-banned/4855.md?page=13)