# Memorable Fortune Cookies **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [March 16, 2014, 8:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/memorable-fortune-cookies/683859 "2014-03-16T20:58:00Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 10\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![nearwildheaven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/90db22/32.png) [@nearwildheaven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nearwildheaven)\ **Post date:** [March 19, 2014, 3:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/memorable-fortune-cookies/683859/41 "2014-03-19T03:46:27Z")
> [@nearwildheaven](#): > > In the early 1990s, I was at a Chinese place with a friend, and mine said, “You or a close friend will be married within a year.” She got married 10 or 11 months later. Unfortunately, they got divorced 10 years later; they have two children together. It was one of those things where, looking back, they weren’t as well matched as everyone thought they were. ☹ Forgot to mention that neither of us was seeing anyone at the time. It turned out she knew him, but they hadn’t gotten together yet. ---
**Author:** ![Siam\_Sam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d78d45/32.png) [@Siam\_Sam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Siam_Sam)\ **Post date:** [March 19, 2014, 3:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/memorable-fortune-cookies/683859/42 "2014-03-19T03:56:43Z")
“Help! I’m a Prisoner in a Chinese Bakery” ---
**Author:** ![needscoffee](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/needscoffee/32/1076_2.png) [@needscoffee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/needscoffee)\ **Post date:** [March 19, 2014, 4:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/memorable-fortune-cookies/683859/43 "2014-03-19T04:51:34Z")
My favorite: “It needs brains to be a real fool” ---
**Author:** ![OldGuy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/3bc359/32.png) [@OldGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OldGuy)\ **Post date:** [March 19, 2014, 6:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/memorable-fortune-cookies/683859/44 "2014-03-19T06:18:51Z")
In college, I was at a restaurant with 9 others. One friend had an evening class so had to leave early. When the cookies came, there were ten. I don’t recall what any of the nine we each got said, but before we left, we cracked open the last one and it read, “He who departs is soon forgotten.” ---
**Author:** ![sciurophobic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/cab0a1/32.png) [@sciurophobic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sciurophobic)\ **Post date:** [March 19, 2014, 3:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/memorable-fortune-cookies/683859/45 "2014-03-19T15:58:41Z")
I got one from Panda Express (you find them in food courts) that read “Adjust Finances – Make Budgets, To Improve Your Financial Standing”. Whatever happened to “You will find money”? ---
**Author:** ![Lightray](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lightray/32/391_2.png) [@Lightray](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lightray)\ **Post date:** [March 19, 2014, 4:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/memorable-fortune-cookies/683859/46 "2014-03-19T16:51:15Z")
“Beware of psychic vampires who will sap your vital wellness.” So of course I passed it around the table, got a whole bunch of “… in bed” comments. But it wasn’t really a fortune! More of a warning, or motto, or something. ---
**Author:** ![Tastes\_of\_Chocolate](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tastes_of_chocolate/32/3232_2.png) [@Tastes\_of\_Chocolate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tastes_of_Chocolate)\ **Post date:** [March 19, 2014, 8:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/memorable-fortune-cookies/683859/47 "2014-03-19T20:20:09Z")
> [@nearwildheaven](#): > > In the early 1990s, I was at a Chinese place with a friend, and mine said, “You or a close friend will be married within a year.” She got married 10 or 11 months later. Unfortunately, they got divorced 10 years later; they have two children together. It was one of those things where, looking back, they weren’t as well matched as everyone thought they were. ☹ In the late '80s, a group of us were out for dinner, and I and another person at the table both got this same fortune. Now, My future SO was at that table (it took us another 5 years to get there) but me and the other holder of this fortune? No way. Last year, my SO had recently gotten a promotion and was working crazy long hours, totally stressed out. I’d known he was going to be late, to I ordered Chinese delivery. After dinner, he opens his cookie and it read “You have a good start, now work harder”. When I came back into the kitchen after putting something away, I found him standing over the sink, lighter in one hand, a flaming fortune in the other. ---
**Author:** ![purplehorseshoe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/purplehorseshoe/32/2996_2.png) [@purplehorseshoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/purplehorseshoe)\ **Post date:** [March 19, 2014, 10:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/memorable-fortune-cookies/683859/48 "2014-03-19T22:29:41Z")
\*\* adds “The Flaming Fortunes” to list of band names \*\* ---
**Author:** ![excavating\_for\_a\_mind](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/e8c25b/32.png) [@excavating\_for\_a\_mind](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/excavating_for_a_mind)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2014, 12:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/memorable-fortune-cookies/683859/49 "2014-03-21T00:11:57Z")
OK, this one is such a classic, I was sure someone would post it. A few years ago, a co-worker and I would eat lunch at a Chinese buffet once a week, the same day. We always paid separate. The Chinese lady who ran the register knew us on sight. Well, one day my co-worker got a fortune: The Best Things In Life Are Free He took it up to the Chinese lady and showed it to her, saying, “That was the best lunch I’ve ever had!” The lady looked at him like he had a third eye, then at the fortune, then said “Very funny. $7.75” $7.75 was the cost of lunch buffet and a drink. ---
**Author:** ![El\_Kabong](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/el_kabong/32/496_2.png) [@El\_Kabong](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/El_Kabong)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2014, 12:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/memorable-fortune-cookies/683859/50 "2014-03-21T00:34:02Z")
At this moment, I’m staring a t a fortune that reads, “The stock market may be your ticket to success”. Then again, I guess, maybe it isn’t. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/memorable-fortune-cookies/683859.md?page=2)