# Men, do you call being left alone with your child "baby sitting" when your wife is away? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [March 21, 2018, 7:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-do-you-call-being-left-alone-with-your-child-baby-sitting-when-your-wife-is-away/810983 "2018-03-21T19:45:46Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![WOOKINPANUB](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wookinpanub/32/132_2.png) [@WOOKINPANUB](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WOOKINPANUB)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2018, 7:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-do-you-call-being-left-alone-with-your-child-baby-sitting-when-your-wife-is-away/810983/1 "2018-03-21T19:45:46Z")
Not trying to be sexist by singling out men, I’ve just never heard a woman say this. So, do \*any \*of you consider taking care of your own child while the other parent is elsewhere baby sitting? ---
**Author:** ![HurricaneDitka](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/96bed5/32.png) [@HurricaneDitka](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HurricaneDitka)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2018, 7:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-do-you-call-being-left-alone-with-your-child-baby-sitting-when-your-wife-is-away/810983/2 "2018-03-21T19:52:18Z")
I don’t know if I’ve ever heard a man say it either, but it does seem to be something of a staple item for jokes / comedy routines. I have heard men say “I’m watching the kids tonight” or something. I’ve occasionally heard women say things along those lines too, but again, without using the specific term “baby sitting”. ---
**Author:** ![Hermitian](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hermitian/32/470_2.png) [@Hermitian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hermitian)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2018, 7:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-do-you-call-being-left-alone-with-your-child-baby-sitting-when-your-wife-is-away/810983/3 "2018-03-21T19:54:14Z")
I had not heard it as a joke before and had the misfortune of once using that word to refer to me watching the kids. My wife did not like it. I guess in my head “babysitting” = watching kids. I did not put extra baggage on the word to imply it is only for children that do not belong to you. ---
**Author:** ![Jophiel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jophiel/32/66_2.png) [@Jophiel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jophiel)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2018, 8:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-do-you-call-being-left-alone-with-your-child-baby-sitting-when-your-wife-is-away/810983/4 "2018-03-21T20:05:25Z")
I’ve always just said “I’ve got the kids” or maybe “I’m watching the kids” but that’s implied by “got”. I never called it babysitting or anything like that. One of my wife’s friends has a husband who gets legitimately upset if she makes plans to go out for the night and doesn’t either make arrangements to drop the kids by her mom’s or else be sure the kids are fed, clean and basically just need to be told to go to bed. He otherwise seems like a good enough guy and his wife has no complaints so I guess it works for them despite being bizarre to me and my wife (who would laugh at me if I tried that nonsense). ---
**Author:** ![Max\_Torque](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e9bcb4/32.png) [@Max\_Torque](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Max_Torque)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2018, 8:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-do-you-call-being-left-alone-with-your-child-baby-sitting-when-your-wife-is-away/810983/5 "2018-03-21T20:36:57Z")
I used to get bent out of shape about this. “Are you babysitting?” “No, I’m parenting.” I’ve mellowed. ---
**Author:** ![TroutMan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/troutman/32/6721_2.png) [@TroutMan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TroutMan)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2018, 9:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-do-you-call-being-left-alone-with-your-child-baby-sitting-when-your-wife-is-away/810983/6 "2018-03-21T21:04:39Z")
My wife and I both used it when one of us was going out to do something fun and the other had to stay home, with the implication that the other would really rather be going out too. It was _mostly_ used in a joking fashion, but there were times… ---
**Author:** ![OldGuy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/3bc359/32.png) [@OldGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OldGuy)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2018, 9:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-do-you-call-being-left-alone-with-your-child-baby-sitting-when-your-wife-is-away/810983/7 "2018-03-21T21:10:32Z")
I think there is a big difference between, “I’m watching the kids tonight.” and “I’m babysitting the kids tonight.” The first is a statement of fact explaining why you might not be available to do something else. The latter seems more to imply the father is doing something outside of normal parenting. But this is obvious all in connotation and intent of the meaning. ---
**Author:** ![doorhinge](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a5b964/32.png) [@doorhinge](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/doorhinge)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2018, 9:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-do-you-call-being-left-alone-with-your-child-baby-sitting-when-your-wife-is-away/810983/8 "2018-03-21T21:20:10Z")
Sure. Babysitting, parenting, watching the kids, changing the diapers, and herding the kids, all worked for me. I raised three daughters while my wife and I worked different shifts. Feed 'em, clean 'em, entertain 'em, put 'em to bed, patch 'em up when they needed it, and don’t lose any of them. You gotta do what you gotta do. OTOH, I’m not easily offended because someone accused me of “babysitting” my kids. ---
**Author:** ![watchwolf49](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/e9c0ed/32.png) [@watchwolf49](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/watchwolf49)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2018, 9:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-do-you-call-being-left-alone-with-your-child-baby-sitting-when-your-wife-is-away/810983/9 "2018-03-21T21:55:41Z")
> [@doorhinge](#): > > [snip] … and don’t lose any of them … [snap] Good advice there … ---
**Author:** ![Happy\_Fun\_Ball](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/happy_fun_ball/32/17664_2.png) [@Happy\_Fun\_Ball](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Happy_Fun_Ball)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2018, 10:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-do-you-call-being-left-alone-with-your-child-baby-sitting-when-your-wife-is-away/810983/10 "2018-03-21T22:59:52Z")
No. I think I said babysitting once and my wife corrected me. Neither she nor I think using the word babysitting is a big deal, it is just not accurate. ---
**Author:** ![msmith537](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d9b06d/32.png) [@msmith537](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/msmith537)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2018, 11:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-do-you-call-being-left-alone-with-your-child-baby-sitting-when-your-wife-is-away/810983/11 "2018-03-21T23:01:01Z")
I say I’m “earning another World’s Greatest Dad mug”. ---
**Author:** ![Slash1972](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/slash1972/32/6461_2.png) [@Slash1972](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Slash1972)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2018, 1:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-do-you-call-being-left-alone-with-your-child-baby-sitting-when-your-wife-is-away/810983/12 "2018-03-22T01:44:10Z")
My ex used to say “Sorry that you are stuck with the kids tonight” I can’t be “stuck” with my own children. I hated that phrasing. ---
**Author:** ![cmkeller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cmkeller/32/118_2.png) [@cmkeller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cmkeller)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2018, 2:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-do-you-call-being-left-alone-with-your-child-baby-sitting-when-your-wife-is-away/810983/13 "2018-03-22T02:22:56Z")
Exactly what **Max Torque** said, verbatim, for me. ---
**Author:** ![nearwildheaven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/90db22/32.png) [@nearwildheaven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nearwildheaven)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2018, 2:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-do-you-call-being-left-alone-with-your-child-baby-sitting-when-your-wife-is-away/810983/14 "2018-03-22T02:49:17Z")
> [@WOOKINPANUB](#): > > Not trying to be sexist by singling out men, I’ve just never heard a woman say this. So, do \*any \*of you consider taking care of your own child while the other parent is elsewhere baby sitting? Probably 90% of the people I’ve heard say this were women talking about their husbands, and I’ve known two women who used that word in reference to caring for their own children, even if their husbands were at home. 😕 ---
**Author:** ![Gatopescado](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gatopescado/32/5711_2.png) [@Gatopescado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gatopescado)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2018, 3:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-do-you-call-being-left-alone-with-your-child-baby-sitting-when-your-wife-is-away/810983/15 "2018-03-22T03:06:16Z")
No. ---
**Author:** ![Peanuthead](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/peanuthead/32/360_2.png) [@Peanuthead](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Peanuthead)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2018, 5:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-do-you-call-being-left-alone-with-your-child-baby-sitting-when-your-wife-is-away/810983/16 "2018-03-22T05:33:45Z")
Bonding. The boys and I are bonding. ---
**Author:** ![Leaffan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/leaffan/32/299_2.png) [@Leaffan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Leaffan)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2018, 6:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-do-you-call-being-left-alone-with-your-child-baby-sitting-when-your-wife-is-away/810983/17 "2018-03-22T06:56:46Z")
No. Because even when my wife was home I routinely took care of the kids in the evening. I was primarily responsible for bathing them, getting them in their jammies, getting a bedtime snack, brushing their teeth and reading bedtime stories. My wife said “I’ve had them all day; it’s your turn” and I was quite happy to comply; they are my kids afterall. If she went out the routine was the same for me. ---
**Author:** ![erysichthon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/d07c76/32.png) [@erysichthon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/erysichthon)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2018, 8:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-do-you-call-being-left-alone-with-your-child-baby-sitting-when-your-wife-is-away/810983/18 "2018-03-22T08:52:30Z")
My kids are grown up, but when they were younger, I never described the OP’s scenario as “babysitting.” Instead, I would say that I was “looking after the kids.” A couple of times I was told that this phrasing is a bit antiquated. To me, it’s “babysitting” only if the “baby” isn’t yours. I just checked [Merriam-Webster](https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/babysit), and their first definition is “to care for children usually during a short absence of the parents.” ---
**Author:** ![Shodan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9f8e36/32.png) [@Shodan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shodan)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2018, 1:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-do-you-call-being-left-alone-with-your-child-baby-sitting-when-your-wife-is-away/810983/19 "2018-03-22T13:05:03Z")
Same as many others - if someone asked “are you babysitting” I responded “no, they’re mine”. I didn’t take it as offensive. Maybe it is because my kids are a different race from me so I assumed people didn’t know that they were/are mine. But I don’t think of a father caring for his kids when his wife goes out as “babysitting”. Babysitting is when you pay somebody. Regards, Shodan ---
**Author:** ![RTFirefly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/c77e96/32.png) [@RTFirefly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RTFirefly)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2018, 1:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-do-you-call-being-left-alone-with-your-child-baby-sitting-when-your-wife-is-away/810983/20 "2018-03-22T13:19:30Z")
Hell, no. That’s my _son_, not someone I’m looking after while the ‘real’ parent is gone. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-do-you-call-being-left-alone-with-your-child-baby-sitting-when-your-wife-is-away/810983.md?page=2)