# Men - Does it bother you that everybody assumes you're a child molester? **URL:** \ **Category:** Great Debates\ **Created:** [July 1, 2008, 10:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-does-it-bother-you-that-everybody-assumes-youre-a-child-molester/454972 "2008-07-01T22:36:18Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 13
**Author:** ![Fear\_Itself](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fear_itself/32/19637_2.png) [@Fear\_Itself](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fear_Itself)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2008, 3:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-does-it-bother-you-that-everybody-assumes-youre-a-child-molester/454972/241 "2008-07-04T15:11:42Z")
[QUOTE=Scylla] Constant ignorant and bad unwanted advice from total strangers concerning your children is the price of having them. [/QUOTE] And dealing with their drug and alcohol problems after you get done with them is the price society pays for your ignorance. ---
**Author:** ![Justin\_Bailey](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/justin_bailey/32/8792_2.png) [@Justin\_Bailey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Justin_Bailey)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2008, 3:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-does-it-bother-you-that-everybody-assumes-youre-a-child-molester/454972/242 "2008-07-04T15:41:43Z")
**Scylla** , your examples of the “danger” your child faces everyday is just painfully ridiculous. Especially because most of them make the child (or the parents) look like the stupid party. [QUOTE=Scylla] Idiot at park loses control of aggressive dog or lets it off leash and it attacks or menaces child. [/quote] Idiot children run up to my dog, who gets all excited a little person is coming to see them. The parents then get mad at me. And if I’m at a park where my dog can be off the leash, then your child should not be walking around unattended. > [@](#): > > Idiot drives through parking lot of Toys R US at 50mph Oh, I didn’t realize only children were at risk when an idiot drives 50 MPH in a parking lot. Or is that only at Toys R Us? > [@](#): > > - Idiot teenager at mall is playing rough grab ass with friends as we go to see Finding Nemo. Teenager runs full speed through ticket line with keys in his hand and accidently strikes three year old on head with keys. Teenager says “sorry” and keeps going. Three year old needs stitches. Boo hoo. Yes, it’s sad when a child gets hurt and needs stictches, but considering all the crazy things kids do, it’s a miracle when one of them escapes childhood without stitches or a broken limb. > [@](#): > > - 5 Year old is feeding ducks in pond at park. Middle-aged couple walks up to look at ducks while talking to each other and accidently knocks kid into pond. Why was your 5 year old that close to the pond (and you were so far away) that they could be “knocked into a pond.” And how deep could the water have been at the edge? A few inches? Less? Come on. > [@](#): > > -Young adults in renaisance costumes are practicing sword fighting near playground. Kids crowd around to watch while they swing bamboo recklessly without each other. Kids get closer and closer. Young adults are talking to kids in friendly fashion. Bamboo swords are swinging very hard, and uncomfortably close to small children. Young adults seem surprised and upset when the children are ushered away from them and they get dirty looks. Again, why did you let your child get so close to the _teens fighting with wooden swords_? They were right to give you dirty looks. > [@](#): > > - Guy rides bike through center of playground at high speed while children are playing. You win this round. > [@](#): > > -Big kids playing way too roughly with or in presence of little kids. Tell them to stop and that’s the end of it. > [@](#): > > -Teenager on date attempts to impress girlfriend with his child-friendliness by pushing your three your old on a swing really really high. Why was a stranger pushing your child on the swing? > [@](#): > > -Unknown adult attempts to scorn correct or chastise your child. For example, you bring toy to park (a kite, say) Your child flies kite and is happy. Other child attempts to steal kite and is rebuffed. Other child cries to parent. That parent approaches your child and tells her to stop being a brat and let somebody else play with it. OK, the parent is an idiot. Some people are idiots. The world continues to spin. > [@](#): > > -Sad neglected or troubled child attempts to attach himself to younger play group as he is ostracized by peers. Does not play appropriately. May be too physical and risk hurting your kid, or may be very bossy or bullying, or may engage in innapropriate and disturbing behavior. Again, tell the big kid to stop. Why is that not allowed? > [@](#): > > -Guy in store walks right to where your child is looking, reaches over her head and pulls a piece of merchandise off a shelf, toppling other merchandise onto your child’s head. Why was your child standing in someone’s way. Children should not be given free reign in stores and parents that expect that are in the wrong. > [@](#): > > -Skeevy person staring at your kid intently. Engaged in no other apparent activity. As we’ve established, this is all in your head. In short, the world is not your child’s playground and it’s wrong of you to expect it to be that way. > [@](#): > > Sooooooo. In public my children are always directly supervised. This also protects the general public from all the harm and inconveniences they can cause the general public which really does not care for random encounters with my kids. From your examples, it doesn’t sound as if this is the case. > [@](#): > > Now the stories that I hear about in this thread are usually where some party is complaining about being unfairly persecuted or given the evil eye by a parent who they feel is assuming they are a child molester. > > I suspect another side to some of these stories. > > It’s like the episode of Cops where the guy is smoking crack while driving 100 mph and shooting his firearm at passers by. When intercepted he will inevitably say “I wasn’t doing anything! I am being unfairly discriminated against and persecuted.” So in your mind, everyone in this thread who is deeply offended that a parent would think they’re a molester just because they’re in the vicinity of their kid really is a molester? Again, I feel sorry for your daughter and the future she will have. > [@](#): > > Sorry guys. Where there is smoke there is often fire. If you are getting these glances and things a lot. Chances are you’re doing something to deserve it. Have you not been listening to anyone in this thread? Molestations initiated by _strangers_ is rare. On the other hand, a parent is much more likely to molest their child. So by your logic, we strange men and women should be watching you. And you especially shouldn’t be left alone with your child, because you’re obviously going to molest her. Since, by your own logic, anyone that says they aren’t doing anything wrong is doing something wrong. ---
**Author:** ![Kalhoun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/3bc359/32.png) [@Kalhoun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kalhoun)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2008, 3:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-does-it-bother-you-that-everybody-assumes-youre-a-child-molester/454972/243 "2008-07-04T15:43:09Z")
[QUOTE=Scylla] As I tried to say politely in my previous post, I feel confident in dismissing the random speculations of the ignorant and unqualified. The very fact that you would deign to offer judgement on specific circumstances of which you have no knowledge is laughable. These things you say, are not significant risks. You could not **possibly** know enough to have a judgement in the matter worth considering. Constant ignorant and bad unwanted advice from total strangers concerning your children is the price of having them. [/QUOTE] I can only go by what you told the world on a message board. I’m simply offering another viewpoint, which you obviously don’t want to hear, because you are right and they’re YOUR kids and that’s final. When you say things like: > [@](#): > > Generally speaking I am not happy or particularly tolerant of unknown adult parties initiating contact with my child without at first looking towards me for the permission glance. If they seek to do so, I will physically interpose myself or loudly get their attention and ask if I can help them. > > I am generally not tolerant of people getting into close physical proximity with my children (unless required by circumstance like an elevator) as you’d be surprised how often a little kid can get whacked or knocked over by a careless or oblivious adult. …I see it as a hindrance; not a help, to your children (and society in general). I initiate contact with children frequently, if I happen to be interested in the same thing they’re interested in, if I happen to notice a danger that they (or their parents) are unaware of, or (gasp!!) if I happen to see something that I think this kid \*might be interested in. \* I don’t ask permission to speak to other people’s children. The parents are most welcome to move away from my space if they feel threatened, but they’d probably be doing their children a disservice. Whatever. ---
**Author:** ![Scylla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a5b964/32.png) [@Scylla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scylla)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2008, 3:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-does-it-bother-you-that-everybody-assumes-youre-a-child-molester/454972/244 "2008-07-04T15:55:28Z")
[QUOTE=Kalhoun] I can only go by what you told the world on a message board. I’m simply offering another viewpoint, which you obviously don’t want to hear, because you are right and they’re YOUR kids and that’s final. [/quote] Yes. That’s it. You’ve got it! [quote] I initiate contact with children frequently, if I happen to be interested in the same thing they’re interested in, if I happen to notice a danger that they (or their parents) are unaware of, or (gasp!!) if I happen to see something that I think this kid \*might be interested in. \* I don’t ask permission to speak to other people’s children. The parents are most welcome to move away from my space if they feel threatened, but they’d probably be doing their children a disservice. /QUOTE] Ok. If you save my child from danger, I will be profusely greatful. If you initiate contact with my child without first at least getting tacit permission, I am going to intervene to the point of making my presence known, checking out what you are doing and making a judgement call. ---
**Author:** ![Kalhoun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/3bc359/32.png) [@Kalhoun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kalhoun)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2008, 4:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-does-it-bother-you-that-everybody-assumes-youre-a-child-molester/454972/245 "2008-07-04T16:03:23Z")
[QUOTE=Scylla] Yes. That’s it. You’ve got it! > [@](#): > > I initiate contact with children frequently, if I happen to be interested in the same thing they’re interested in, if I happen to notice a danger that they (or their parents) are unaware of, or (gasp!!) if I happen to see something that I think this kid \*might be interested in. \* I don’t ask permission to speak to other people’s children. The parents are most welcome to move away from my space if they feel threatened, but they’d probably be doing their children a disservice. > /QUOTE] > > Ok. If you save my child from danger, I will be profusely greatful. If you initiate contact with my child without first at least getting tacit permission, I am going to intervene to the point of making my presence known, checking out what you are doing and making a judgement call. See, I don’t call that “intervention”…I’d call it “participation.” Big difference in how people will perceive you. ---
**Author:** ![MrDibble](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mrdibble/32/114_2.png) [@MrDibble](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MrDibble)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2008, 4:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-does-it-bother-you-that-everybody-assumes-youre-a-child-molester/454972/246 "2008-07-04T16:06:51Z")
[hijack]Just wanted to say - couldn’t you just cut the hook part off a fly, and then let your daughter cast with it? ---
**Author:** ![Scylla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a5b964/32.png) [@Scylla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scylla)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2008, 4:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-does-it-bother-you-that-everybody-assumes-youre-a-child-molester/454972/247 "2008-07-04T16:18:24Z")
[QUOTE=Kalhoun] [QUOTE=Scylla] Yes. That’s it. You’ve got it! See, I don’t call that “intervention”…I’d call it “participation.” Big difference in how people will perceive you. [/QUOTE] I would be happy to think are differences are simply semantic. ---
**Author:** ![Scylla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a5b964/32.png) [@Scylla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scylla)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2008, 4:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-does-it-bother-you-that-everybody-assumes-youre-a-child-molester/454972/248 "2008-07-04T16:21:26Z")
[QUOTE=MrDibble] [hijack]Just wanted to say - couldn’t you just cut the hook part off a fly, and then let your daughter cast with it? [/QUOTE] I would have had to have been smart enough to think of that. That’s a great idea. ---
**Author:** ![Kalhoun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/3bc359/32.png) [@Kalhoun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kalhoun)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2008, 4:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-does-it-bother-you-that-everybody-assumes-youre-a-child-molester/454972/249 "2008-07-04T16:44:07Z")
[QUOTE=Scylla] [QUOTE=Kalhoun] I would be happy to think are differences are simply semantic. [/QUOTE] But the words have very different meanings, and your behavior in this regard would force a decidedly different outcome, depending on whether you: Intervene (To involve oneself in a situation so as to alter or hinder an action or development), or Participate (the act of taking part) ---
**Author:** ![Scylla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a5b964/32.png) [@Scylla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scylla)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2008, 4:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-does-it-bother-you-that-everybody-assumes-youre-a-child-molester/454972/250 "2008-07-04T16:46:21Z")
Justin: I see that instead of responding to several of the scenarios, you’ve simply rewritten them. The one that you do stay with as written is kind of telling. Your response to a 180 kid running full speed at and colliding with a 38 pound girl, and in the process striking her in the head with car keys so that she needs stitches is… “Boo-hoo.” Apparently not a big deal, or worthy of concern, huh? I have a low regard for such opinions. I start by thinking how limited in intelligence the average or mean person is. By definition, fully half the people I encounter will not be as smart as even that. Than I realize that most people don’t think very much about what they are doing. Most of the time they are using only a fraction of their limited intellectual potential. It has been my experience that these are the people who are most likely to offer you advice on how to raise your kid, and who are most likely to criticize or interfere. It is not my place or my job to correct or improve these folk, nor do I have an interest in doing so. I feel no obligation show their opinions any respect. I can safely dismiss them. ---
**Author:** ![GorillaMan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/50afbb/32.png) [@GorillaMan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GorillaMan)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2008, 4:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-does-it-bother-you-that-everybody-assumes-youre-a-child-molester/454972/251 "2008-07-04T16:57:45Z")
[QUOTE=Scylla] I start by thinking how limited in intelligence the average or mean person is. By definition, fully half the people I encounter will not be as smart as even that. [/quote] That would be the median, not mean. Do keep using all of your superior intellectual potential, by all means. ---
**Author:** ![Scylla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a5b964/32.png) [@Scylla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scylla)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2008, 5:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-does-it-bother-you-that-everybody-assumes-youre-a-child-molester/454972/252 "2008-07-04T17:05:51Z")
[QUOTE=Kalhoun] [QUOTE=Scylla] But the words have very different meanings, and your behavior in this regard would force a decidedly different outcome, depending on whether you: Intervene (To involve oneself in a situation so as to alter or hinder an action or development), or Participate (the act of taking part) [/QUOTE] Semantics? Well, if we must: My participation is certainly an intervention because of the observer fallacy. It certainly alters the interaction, and I may in fact hinder or stop it, either by accident or design. But, I admit that “participation” is a softer and friendlier word than “intervention.” Lots of parents make the mistake of thinking that they are participating, when in fact they are intervening in their child’s development. The classic example would be the Dad at the baseball game who yells at the ump and the coach and the other kids to “support” his kid, when in fact he is ruining it for his kid and everybody else. A lot of times people will think they are participating in something when in fact they are intervening i.e. the fly fisherman. I try to be careful of the negative effects of what I might do with good intentions. For example, if my children are playing happily with the bocce balls and I want to “participate” I may over-instruct by trying to teach them how to play bocce properly and ruin all the fun and positive experience. In such an example, my participation is actually an intervention. So, I start with the premise that I am going to fuck and ruin it if I try to particpate, and then make a judgement call as to whether it’s still worth it. From my perspective, it is better if you ask me first before you take a positive step to interract with my child. That way you can make sure that your participation will not be an intervention, and you will save me the hazard of being a potential intervention a few minutes down the road. For example, if you say to me: “I see your child is looking at caterpillars and spiders. I noticed a praying mantis in a bush just down this path a bit. May I show it to her?” Three minutes later I don’t have to obviously follow you and ask you what you are doing and discern your intentions, and potentially intervene and diminish a magical and constructive experience for everybody. ---
**Author:** ![Scylla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a5b964/32.png) [@Scylla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scylla)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2008, 5:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-does-it-bother-you-that-everybody-assumes-youre-a-child-molester/454972/253 "2008-07-04T17:08:06Z")
[QUOTE=GorillaMan] That would be the median, not mean. Do keep using all of your superior intellectual potential, by all means. [/QUOTE] My intellect has expanded beyond the need for picayune literalism. ---
**Author:** ![Kalhoun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/3bc359/32.png) [@Kalhoun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kalhoun)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2008, 5:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-does-it-bother-you-that-everybody-assumes-youre-a-child-molester/454972/254 "2008-07-04T17:09:54Z")
You’re looking under the bed for trouble. No skin off my nose, as I don’t have to live with you. I also don’t have to ask permission to speak to your children or move away because you perceive your child might fall into a lake or your child’s feelings might be hurt by another kid whining to have a turn at your kid’s toy. I also don’t need your permission to push the merry-go-round if your child is on it. Nor do I need to ask if it’s ok if I get in the sandbox and create a magnificent castle with some 5-year-olds. I might even ask your kid to pass the shovel and bucket to me. You can’t stop me. Your powers are useless here. ---
**Author:** ![GorillaMan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/50afbb/32.png) [@GorillaMan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GorillaMan)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2008, 5:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-does-it-bother-you-that-everybody-assumes-youre-a-child-molester/454972/255 "2008-07-04T17:14:39Z")
[QUOTE=Scylla] For example, if you say to me: “I see your child is looking at caterpillars and spiders. I noticed a praying mantis in a bush just down this path a bit. May I show it to her?” [/QUOTE] I won’t. I’ll talk to your child, treating her as an individual rather than a prized possession. > [@Scylla](#): > > My intellect has expanded beyond the need for picayune literalism. You were the one who threw the superfluous (and incorrect) mathematical word in, just to sound smarter. ---
**Author:** ![Kalhoun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/3bc359/32.png) [@Kalhoun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kalhoun)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2008, 5:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-does-it-bother-you-that-everybody-assumes-youre-a-child-molester/454972/256 "2008-07-04T17:23:47Z")
[QUOTE=GorillaMan] I won’t. I’ll talk to your child, treating her as an individual rather than a prized possession. [/QUOTE] From now on, you will refer to her as “Miss Ross.” ---
**Author:** ![Scylla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a5b964/32.png) [@Scylla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scylla)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2008, 6:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-does-it-bother-you-that-everybody-assumes-youre-a-child-molester/454972/257 "2008-07-04T18:03:45Z")
[QUOTE=Kalhoun] I also don’t need your permission to push the merry-go-round if your child is on it. [/quote] Actually, you do. You may not think you do, but you do. If you do not seek it, I am less inclined to extend you the benefit of the doubt, be polite, or cut you slack. I will not have a lot of respect for you because you are not being prudent, and, in my judgement I am going to assume that this lack of prudence and good judgement you are demonstrating is likely to extend into your interraction with my daughter. I may intervene on these grounds alone. Here’s why. Perhaps my daughter has just eaten a big lunch and an ice cream and is prone to motion sickness. She is currently happy on the merry go round by herself going at 1/4 mile an hour. If you spin her, she is going to feel nauseaus and crappy and have a bad time for the next hour and may even throw up. If I allow you to procede you will likely simply walk away when this happens, and I will have to clean it up and comfort my daughter, and you will have ruined her day. If you ask, then I know you are concerned and are seeking knowledge about whether your interraction will be a good thing before you do it. This gives me confidence that it will be. If you don’t, I assume that it’s really not about what’s best for the kid, as far as you’re concerned. If it was, you’d make the effort to find out first. Since you didn’t, I am likely to intervene. > [@](#): > > Nor do I need to ask if it’s ok if I get in the sandbox and create a magnificent castle with some 5-year-olds. I might even ask your kid to pass the shovel and bucket to me. You can’t stop me. Your powers are useless here. No. You do not seem to understand. I am **THE HAMMER OF GOD**. In such a situation you are misinterpreting my restraint for impotence. Whether or not you are aware of it, you are being placed under a microscope and being judged. An unknown adult male, invading the sandbox to play with children not his own is being placed under intense scrutiny. Most every parent is evaluating you, not just me. You are undergoing the worst form of profiling and suspicion possible, and chances are you have already failed the first major test. If you have not talked to the parents or otherwise presented yourself for examination or permission in some form, your judgement is seriously in question. In my experience, most people who are good with kids and take pleasure in interracting with them and offering them constructive experiences are pretty considerate and concerned individuals. They also know that it is a good idea to show and demonstrate their intentions and harmlessness and consideration. You seem to be skipping this step. It appears to me that you are simultaneously approaching my kids and challenging me while using poor judgement. Your statement “You can’t stop me,” pretty much confirms the challenge. How do you appear? What is your demeanor? How do I feel about you? I will be asking myself all these questions. Based on your mistakes so far I am going to question whether or not you know how to play well with kids. Will what you are doing be a participation or an intervention. Maybe the kids are just happy playing by themselves digging a hole and don’t want the structure and control of an adult, and aren’t interested in building a “magnificent sandcastle?” Will you be cognizant and adaptive or ruin it for everybody? These are the questions I will be asking myself. Most of all, I will be asking myself how this feels, looking for a twitch or a signal from any of my parental detectors that may signal something not right. That makes it sound a lot bigger than it is, but that will all occur internally and automatically for me and most of the other parents in about the first 30 seconds. No matter how I feel, you and I will have a conversation. Likely it will be a very transparent and pleasant conversation. That’s strictly up to you. Regardless of how the conversation goes there will be a subtext which you will need to respond to appropriately. If you don’t, it will be suggested to you that perhaps this sandbox is for little kids not big adults and as we were here first, would you mind very much letting the kids play by themselves or now, thanks so much. This isn’t really a request. If we are at this sad point, chances are that there has been some communication between the parents and there is consensus. Various things can happen from there. But if you think “He can’t stop me” and act on it, what you are telling me is that you are trying to usurp control over my children. Considerate well-intentioned adults do not do that. * * * It’s very easy to have very positive experiences that everybody is happy and comfortable with. They are welcomed. I as a parent am grateful for them. If you are not asking, you are putting yourself at risk. You are running the risk of doing the equivalent of handing a popsicle to a kid with an insulin pump. ---
**Author:** ![Scylla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a5b964/32.png) [@Scylla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scylla)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2008, 6:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-does-it-bother-you-that-everybody-assumes-youre-a-child-molester/454972/258 "2008-07-04T18:11:36Z")
[QUOTE=GorillaMan] I won’t. I’ll talk to your child, treating her as an individual rather than a prized possession. [/quote] With an attitude like that you are likely to create a confrontation. You may end up explaining to the policeman that you were only taking the little girl away from the playground and behind a bush to show her a praying mantis. Good luck with that. ---
**Author:** ![GorillaMan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/50afbb/32.png) [@GorillaMan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GorillaMan)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2008, 6:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-does-it-bother-you-that-everybody-assumes-youre-a-child-molester/454972/259 "2008-07-04T18:15:27Z")
[QUOTE=Scylla] But if you think “He can’t stop me” and act on it… [/QUOTE] That’s not the thought process going on. This would presuppose that we all see your child primarily as your property. We see her as a child, a person. We’re not trying to usurp your authority, it does not and cannot exist over everything that takes place in her life. ---
**Author:** ![GorillaMan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/50afbb/32.png) [@GorillaMan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GorillaMan)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2008, 6:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-does-it-bother-you-that-everybody-assumes-youre-a-child-molester/454972/260 "2008-07-04T18:17:45Z")
[QUOTE=Scylla] With an attitude like that you are likely to create a confrontation. You may end up explaining to the policeman that you were only taking the little girl away from the playground and behind a bush to show her a praying mantis. Good luck with that. [/QUOTE] I see the mantis has moved from path, out of the playground and hidden behind a bush since you last mentioned it. I said I would talk to your daughter, everything else is disingenuous elaboration. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-does-it-bother-you-that-everybody-assumes-youre-a-child-molester/454972.md?page=12) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-does-it-bother-you-that-everybody-assumes-youre-a-child-molester/454972.md?page=14)