# "Men fantasize about sex. Women fantasize about food." How is the latter supposed to work? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [October 5, 2011, 4:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-fantasize-about-sex-women-fantasize-about-food-how-is-the-latter-supposed-to-work/598695 "2011-10-05T16:33:49Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Diamonds02](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b5a626/32.png) [@Diamonds02](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diamonds02)\ **Post date:** [October 5, 2011, 4:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-fantasize-about-sex-women-fantasize-about-food-how-is-the-latter-supposed-to-work/598695/1 "2011-10-05T16:33:49Z")
I know many people LOVE to eat. We are a gluttonous country. But how does one _fantasize_ about food? I heard this on one of the radio shows this morning. They quoted a recent study that men fantasize most about sex (obviously), but women fantasize most about food? Why? Hormones? ---
**Author:** ![MeanOldLady](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/meanoldlady/32/10737_2.png) [@MeanOldLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MeanOldLady)\ **Post date:** [October 5, 2011, 4:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-fantasize-about-sex-women-fantasize-about-food-how-is-the-latter-supposed-to-work/598695/2 "2011-10-05T16:37:55Z")
What kind of fat ass fantasizes about food? When my mind drifts at work, which is often, I’m thinking about vacations I wish I were taking, sex, what it would be like if I could teleport, sex, \*maybe \*I’ll wonder briefly what I’m going to have for dinner later, sex, how badly I wish I were drinking, sex, what I’m going to do this weekend, whether or not I’ll have sex with that one guy who’s been making moves on me but I’m kinda iffy toward, what it would be like to have a robot maid, monkey knife fights, sex and then sometimes sex. ---
**Author:** ![impatien](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/c89c15/32.png) [@impatien](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/impatien)\ **Post date:** [October 5, 2011, 4:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-fantasize-about-sex-women-fantasize-about-food-how-is-the-latter-supposed-to-work/598695/3 "2011-10-05T16:38:26Z")
By fantasize if you mean think about food a lot, well then yes, I must say I do. I love to cook, and bake, and do it every day, and devote a lot of time to thinking about food. I definitely don’t think about sex much. ---
**Author:** ![Lissla\_Lissar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/8491ac/32.png) [@Lissla\_Lissar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lissla_Lissar)\ **Post date:** [October 5, 2011, 4:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-fantasize-about-sex-women-fantasize-about-food-how-is-the-latter-supposed-to-work/598695/4 "2011-10-05T16:54:45Z")
Heh. I was talking to a friend last night, and we’re both good and enthusiastic cooks, and love food, and we were making ourselves hungry talking homemade jelly, what we’re going to make as Christmas food-presents, and how to caramelize potatoes in the oven. I think about food a lot- ingredients, permutations, planning, cooking technique. A lot. ---
**Author:** ![Heart\_of\_Dorkness](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/4bbf92/32.png) [@Heart\_of\_Dorkness](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Heart_of_Dorkness)\ **Post date:** [October 5, 2011, 4:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-fantasize-about-sex-women-fantasize-about-food-how-is-the-latter-supposed-to-work/598695/5 "2011-10-05T16:58:37Z")
> [@MeanOldLady](#): > > What kind of fat ass fantasizes about food? Heh. This kind of fat ass, apparently. Just a minute ago, for instance, I was really hungry and hadn’t gotten lunch yet, and I caught a whiff of something that smelled like homemade mac and cheese. I thought, Oh, that would be so awesome for lunch! And I could just taste the gooey cheese and the crispy baked edges. But aside from the fact that I can’t get any such thing anywhere near here, I also had a fatty, starchy dinner last night, and I’ll probably be having the leftovers for dinner tonight, so there’s no way in hell I’d have mac and cheese for lunch, even if I could. Now, I’ve got a big ol’ salad, and I’m perfectly happy, but until I started eating, I was still thinking about mac and cheese. I think that counts as fantasizing. ETA: I fantasize plenty about sex, too, though - and I fail to believe that men don’t \*also \*fantasize about food. ---
**Author:** ![Filbert](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/filbert/32/3433_2.png) [@Filbert](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Filbert)\ **Post date:** [October 5, 2011, 4:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-fantasize-about-sex-women-fantasize-about-food-how-is-the-latter-supposed-to-work/598695/6 "2011-10-05T16:59:35Z")
I’ve fantasised about food when I went on a 2-day trek and vastly underestimated how much I needed to bring; had some lovely fictional food. I can’t say that happens often though. Sex, on the other hand… ---
**Author:** ![Spice\_Weasel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spice_weasel/32/5435_2.png) [@Spice\_Weasel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spice_Weasel)\ **Post date:** [October 5, 2011, 5:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-fantasize-about-sex-women-fantasize-about-food-how-is-the-latter-supposed-to-work/598695/7 "2011-10-05T17:03:31Z")
Well, there has to be a reason the food channel is so popular. This isn’t too hard for me to understand. Fat, salt and sugar send powerful messages to the human brain, and includes that dopamine rush associated with other addictions/behavioral dispositions. Eating a good meal can feel just as satisfying as sex. Furthermore, there are some properties in certain food that have been found to act as mild antidepressants. When you crave something, whether you want to call it fantasizing or not, that’s basically what you’re doing. I imagine hormones do have something to do with it. I used to only have the really bad cravings around ‘‘that time of month,’’ because it’s one of the few pleasurable things I can experience in the midst of depression. I’ve never had a huge appetite, but since going on Depo I now feel like eating everything all the time. My home is basically a fortress to keep unhealthy food out. But yesterday I sat for a good half hour and seriously considered going to the store, getting a bunch of junk food and hiding it in the closet. I thought specifically about what I would buy and fantasized about eating it before my husband got home. I never had that intense of a desire to binge before, but my Aunt is a former bulimic and has those impulses all the time. This isn’t just a problem for morbidly obese people. I am overweight by about 20lbs. You wouldn’t look at me and say, ‘‘That girl struggles with food addiction.’’ But this girl does. ---
**Author:** ![MeanOldLady](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/meanoldlady/32/10737_2.png) [@MeanOldLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MeanOldLady)\ **Post date:** [October 5, 2011, 5:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-fantasize-about-sex-women-fantasize-about-food-how-is-the-latter-supposed-to-work/598695/8 "2011-10-05T17:07:42Z")
> [@Heart\_of\_Dorkness](#): > > ETA: I fantasize plenty about sex, too, though - and I fail to believe that men don’t \*also \*fantasize about food. Heh, so I was mainly amusing myself with the comment you quoted, but the idea of fantasizing \*most \*about food strikes me as silly. I will very occasionally fantasize about eating something delicious if I’m particularly hungry, and at other times I’ll think about food if I’ve decided to try cooking something new, but I’d say 94% of my ruminations on food are more thinking and planning rather than fantasizing. I only have romantic thoughts about food very rarely, and usually when I’m starving. I spend way more time fantasizing about being a trillionaire who’s having sex all the time than I do about food. ---
**Author:** ![Jackmannii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jackmannii/32/311_2.png) [@Jackmannii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jackmannii)\ **Post date:** [October 5, 2011, 5:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-fantasize-about-sex-women-fantasize-about-food-how-is-the-latter-supposed-to-work/598695/9 "2011-10-05T17:07:58Z")
> [@Diamonds02](#): > > But how does one _fantasize_ about food? I think about it frequently. But “fantasize”? I don’t construct scenarios in which giant lasagnas march into my office. > [@](#): > > I heard this on one of the radio shows this morning. They quoted a recent study that men fantasize most about sex (obviously), but women fantasize most about food? A super-scientific study, one assumes, but maybe not taking into account individual variation, age-dependent differences and the ability to fantasize about both, sometimes simultaneously (a la George Costanza). I realized my own emphases might be changing a few years ago, when a radio ad came on for one of the local gentleman’s clubs. “Sizzling hot women!” (yawn), “Private rooms for personal entertainment!” (meh), “50-foot buffet” (whoa, _50-foot buffet!_ Where is this place again?) ---
**Author:** ![Heart\_of\_Dorkness](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/4bbf92/32.png) [@Heart\_of\_Dorkness](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Heart_of_Dorkness)\ **Post date:** [October 5, 2011, 5:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-fantasize-about-sex-women-fantasize-about-food-how-is-the-latter-supposed-to-work/598695/10 "2011-10-05T17:14:41Z")
> [@olivesmarch4th](#): > > But yesterday I sat for a good half hour and seriously considered going to the store, getting a bunch of junk food and hiding it in the closet. I thought specifically about what I would buy and fantasized about eating it before my husband got home. Interestingly, a [recent study](http://news.sciencemag.org/sciencenow/2010/12/to-eat-less-imagine-eating-more.html) found that if you actually imagined the act of eating those specific things - not just, “Oh, I’d like to eat a big bunch of Funyuns!” but “Here’s me taking a Funyun out of the bag, putting it in my mouth, chewing, swallowing, taking another one… etc.” - it could _help_ you resist those cravings, or eat less of those foods if you did eat them. ---
**Author:** ![Ludovic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ab992/32.png) [@Ludovic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ludovic)\ **Post date:** [October 5, 2011, 5:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-fantasize-about-sex-women-fantasize-about-food-how-is-the-latter-supposed-to-work/598695/11 "2011-10-05T17:16:24Z")
> [@Jackmannii](#): > > I don’t construct scenarios in which giant lasagnas march into my office. I do. In addition, sometimes I fantasize about _food_. ---
**Author:** ![Leaffan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/leaffan/32/299_2.png) [@Leaffan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Leaffan)\ **Post date:** [October 5, 2011, 5:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-fantasize-about-sex-women-fantasize-about-food-how-is-the-latter-supposed-to-work/598695/12 "2011-10-05T17:22:52Z")
> [@olivesmarch4th](#): > > Well, there has to be a reason the food channel is so popular. … The porn channel is quite popular too. So I hear. ---
**Author:** ![Slithy\_Tove](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/slithy_tove/32/18248_2.png) [@Slithy\_Tove](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Slithy_Tove)\ **Post date:** [October 5, 2011, 5:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-fantasize-about-sex-women-fantasize-about-food-how-is-the-latter-supposed-to-work/598695/13 "2011-10-05T17:24:21Z")
Someone needs to tell the pornographers that they’re wasting market share by not filming alternate endings to the pizza delivery man scenes. ---
**Author:** ![Lissla\_Lissar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/8491ac/32.png) [@Lissla\_Lissar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lissla_Lissar)\ **Post date:** [October 5, 2011, 5:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-fantasize-about-sex-women-fantasize-about-food-how-is-the-latter-supposed-to-work/598695/14 "2011-10-05T17:35:11Z")
It’s interesting. We have a friend who has a food addiction problem, will eat the whole of whatever he’s bought, and has frequently commented on the amount of food or snacks we just have hanging around. Neither my husband (not particularly interested in food) or I have food problems, and we’re both pretty thin, in spite of the amount of cooking and baking I do, and how much I fantasize about food. We both just tend to stop when we’re full, and he doesn’t, as far as I can see. ---
**Author:** ![Lynn\_Bodoni](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e47c2d/32.png) [@Lynn\_Bodoni](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lynn_Bodoni)\ **Post date:** [October 5, 2011, 6:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-fantasize-about-sex-women-fantasize-about-food-how-is-the-latter-supposed-to-work/598695/15 "2011-10-05T18:33:33Z")
> [@](#): > > I realized my own emphases might be changing a few years ago, when a radio ad came on for one of the local gentleman’s clubs. “Sizzling hot women!” (yawn), “Private rooms for personal entertainment!” (meh), “50-foot buffet” (whoa, _50-foot buffet!_ Where is this place again?) My husband says that he’s been to a couple of Hooters, and was unimpressed. He says that he sees more of appealing women on TV and online, and that he can get better food just about anywhere else where the servers don’t wear paper hats. His verdict was that the food was overpriced and not really worth eating, and that while most of the waitresses were cute, they weren’t so cute as to make up for the bad food and high prices. Then he wants to know when I’ll be making lasagna or chicken fried steak again. Or a meatloaf. ---
**Author:** ![Heart\_of\_Dorkness](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/4bbf92/32.png) [@Heart\_of\_Dorkness](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Heart_of_Dorkness)\ **Post date:** [October 5, 2011, 6:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-fantasize-about-sex-women-fantasize-about-food-how-is-the-latter-supposed-to-work/598695/16 "2011-10-05T18:45:35Z")
> [@Lynn\_Bodoni](#): > > Then he wants to know when I’ll be making lasagna or chicken fried steak again. Or a meatloaf. …and what you’ll be wearing while making it. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![TriPolar](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tripolar/32/3008_2.png) [@TriPolar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TriPolar)\ **Post date:** [October 5, 2011, 6:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-fantasize-about-sex-women-fantasize-about-food-how-is-the-latter-supposed-to-work/598695/17 "2011-10-05T18:50:50Z")
> [@Lynn\_Bodoni](#): > > My husband says that he’s been to a couple of Hooters, and was unimpressed. He says that he sees more of appealing women on TV and online, and that he can get better food just about anywhere else where the servers don’t wear paper hats. His verdict was that the food was overpriced and not really worth eating, and that while most of the waitresses were cute, they weren’t so cute as to make up for the bad food and high prices. They have food at Hooters? I never noticed. ---
**Author:** ![Chopper9760](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/cdc98d/32.png) [@Chopper9760](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chopper9760)\ **Post date:** [October 5, 2011, 6:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-fantasize-about-sex-women-fantasize-about-food-how-is-the-latter-supposed-to-work/598695/18 "2011-10-05T18:58:42Z")
I eat several times a day. Can’t say the same thing about sex, which is probably why I think about it so much more often. ---
**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\ **Post date:** [October 5, 2011, 7:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-fantasize-about-sex-women-fantasize-about-food-how-is-the-latter-supposed-to-work/598695/19 "2011-10-05T19:23:42Z")
> [@olivesmarch4th](#): > > Eating a good meal can feel just as satisfying as sex. I’ll have what she’s having. ---
**Author:** ![rhubarbarin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/eb9ed0/32.png) [@rhubarbarin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rhubarbarin)\ **Post date:** [October 5, 2011, 8:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-fantasize-about-sex-women-fantasize-about-food-how-is-the-latter-supposed-to-work/598695/20 "2011-10-05T20:28:40Z")
Weird. I think about sex quite a bit but I don’t even think about eating when I’m doing it - I am always reading something while I shovel it in. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-fantasize-about-sex-women-fantasize-about-food-how-is-the-latter-supposed-to-work/598695.md?page=2)