# Men - Feminine sides... **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [December 20, 1999, 9:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-feminine-sides/12278 "1999-12-20T21:50:00Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 16\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![matt\_mcl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7ab992/32.png) [@matt\_mcl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/matt_mcl)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 1999, 6:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-feminine-sides/12278/21 "1999-12-24T06:08:00Z")
So much for that stereotype. Gay men are among some of the worst feminine-side-showers I know. Macho gay guys turn me off so bad. I’m sitting there going “Geez, get a load of that muscle mary over there! What’s _she_ trying to prove, girlfriend?” And he’s strutting around like he’s so bloody testosterone enhanced. Some men can work butchness. Other men… it’s just so obvious that they’re pretending. Geesh. Loosen up. Wrists were made to flex. ---
**Author:** ![Catrandom](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/7bcc69/32.png) [@Catrandom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Catrandom)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 1999, 7:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-feminine-sides/12278/22 "1999-12-23T19:45:00Z")
I prefer a gentleman who isn’t obsessed with his maleness to the point that he’s afraid to admit that he cares about anything other than his job, his car and football. Such gentlemen are rather dull. But “feminine side” seems so often to refer to the side that is a self-absorbed, whining wuss. (Women have this side, too, of course.)Before I retired from the whole girl/boy thing, I seemed to attract nothing but emotional “fixer-uppers” who were all too in touch with their emotions, to the point of being able to talk of nothing else. Nuts, says I, to that. Catrandom, who may have a bit of an overdeveloped masculine side. ---
**Author:** ![Padeye](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/a9a28c/32.png) [@Padeye](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Padeye)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 1999, 8:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-feminine-sides/12278/23 "1999-12-23T20:00:00Z")
Boris, you hit a reak key point with cats. IMHO a real man is not afraid to cuddle his cat no matter who sees it. I am astonished at other men I meet that that feel that have to express a violent harted of cats to appear masculine. Chalk it up to homophobia, poor toilet training, insecurity or whatever but I find it a repellent personality trait. By all rights I should have picked up that trait from my dad but didn’t. He finally came around but it took almost 30 years. * * * They don’t call me the colonel because I’m some dumbass army guy. ---
**Author:** ![Sealemon88](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c68b51/32.png) [@Sealemon88](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sealemon88)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 1999, 8:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-feminine-sides/12278/24 "1999-12-23T20:06:00Z")
I try not to recycle my jokes, but I’ll make an exception here: I found my feminine side. As it turns out, she’s a lesbian nymphomaniac, so we get along _just fine_. > [@](#): > > hug other men > > - express their (tender) feelings > - be very well groomed with good hygiene > - have close friends of both genders > - be a loving and tender father and homemaker Well, replace “father” with “SO” (no kids yet), and I’m four-for-four. Sealemon88 \< not afraid to let his feminine and masculine sides play house together. \> * * * You say “cheesy” like that’s a **BAD** thing. ---
**Author:** ![tomndebb](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/b9e5f3/32.png) [@tomndebb](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tomndebb)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 1999, 8:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-feminine-sides/12278/25 "1999-12-23T20:41:00Z")
Uh, **Sealemon88**? You wouldn’t happen to have dated **tracer** , would you? ---
**Author:** ![Sealemon88](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c68b51/32.png) [@Sealemon88](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sealemon88)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 1999, 8:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-feminine-sides/12278/26 "1999-12-23T20:45:00Z")
\< checking himself over \> Nope, all man, tomndeb. \< sniffs pits \>. Yup. **all** man! But thanks for the concern. Poop head. 🙂 * * * You say “cheesy” like that’s a **BAD** thing. ---
**Author:** ![system](https://global.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/original/2X/e/e489c3b7d8fce19c4b355dd4fc3f88cc39c34b87.png) [@system](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/system)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 1999, 2:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-feminine-sides/12278/27 "1999-12-24T02:14:00Z")
What’s cuddling pets got to do with anything? I’ve always cuddled my pets: cats, dogs, snakes, whatever. I don’t care for lotion or jewelry, but I don’t mind hugging guys and I love cooking. Oh, and I think words like “fabulous” are simply divine. * * * _“I hope my sensitive female side is wearing sensible leather pumps.” …Zippy The Pinhead_ ---
**Author:** ![Persephone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ecc23a/32.png) [@Persephone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Persephone)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 1999, 5:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-feminine-sides/12278/28 "1999-12-24T05:15:00Z")
My husband tries hard to be a studly guy, and periodically engages in studly guy activities, but he’s not very good at being a studly guy. It’s kind of odd, really, because he is a phenominal blues guitar player. But take off the guitar, and he’s just an ordinary guy, far more in touch with his feminine side than any man I’ve met before. He doesn’t spit. He doesn’t watch porn. He didn’t think _The Man Show_ was all that funny. _He leaves the seat down._ I just reread what I wrote, and came to the realization that I have nothing to complain about. Oh well. Never mind. ---
**Author:** ![meek](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ce73a5/32.png) [@meek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/meek)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 1999, 5:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-feminine-sides/12278/29 "1999-12-24T05:30:00Z")
My feminine side keeps whining that we never go out anymore… I am not schizophrenic - and neither are we. * * * Wishing all you at the SDMB Happy Xmas and a GREAT 2000 and beyond! ---
**Author:** ![Boris\_B](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/fbc32d/32.png) [@Boris\_B](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boris_B)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 1999, 6:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-feminine-sides/12278/30 "1999-12-24T06:34:00Z")
**TennHippie** > [@](#): > > What’s cuddling pets got to do with anything? I’ve always cuddled my pets: cats, dogs, snakes, whatever. You’re clearly a girly-man. Or at least some kind of a long-haired Bohemian type. In fact, you’re so much so that I think you should change your user name to something like … I don’t know … BeatNik? FlowerChild? FreeSpirit? GranolaBoy? * * * - Boris B, Hellacious Ornithologist ---
**Author:** ![Byzantine](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/dfb087/32.png) [@Byzantine](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Byzantine)\ **Post date:** [December 25, 1999, 12:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-feminine-sides/12278/31 "1999-12-25T00:34:00Z")
So, uh, since I’m feminine should I make a big deal out of my masculine side? You know, that side of me that loves to eat lots of chilli and fart while watching the tube? The side of me that likes to arm wrestle and win? That side of me that thinks belching the alphabet was a major accomplishment? I’m SERIOUS! I really do these things, and more! It’s not that big of a deal. Probably because I do not see them as particularly masculine… they are crude, not manly. Gomes – all I can say is I wonder who the fuck you hang out with. I don’t LIKE macho shit-heads. I LIKE a man who can express feelings to me. I have no desire to attack him or punish him because I do not see emotions and feelings as being feminine. I see them as human. And yes, I’ve arm wrestled some of my male companions and won and they did not DIE from it. In fact, they LOVED it. Probably because they have a great sense of self and are not worried by such petty things. And sure, I can out fart and belch most guys. Gee, none of them seems to have a problem with this… well, unless I do this in public or at a restaurant… or while meeting their mother for the first time… maybe you just need to meet some people who are more secure in just being human and are not so worried about stereotypes. Dunno, that might be it. * * * Best! Byz ---
**Author:** ![Wolf\_of\_Were](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/59ef9b/32.png) [@Wolf\_of\_Were](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wolf_of_Were)\ **Post date:** [December 25, 1999, 12:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-feminine-sides/12278/32 "1999-12-25T00:55:00Z")
Just how many times WAS this thread closed? Perhaps you should take a hint, and leave it closed… Everybodies’ different. If you don’t like having disgustingly greasy skin , then don’t use oil / lotion. (That’s for those like myself- I despise that junk. If I wanted to be dirty, I would go roll around in dirt.) Just because one doesn’t, does not mean they aren’t “in touch with their feminine sides”. Why would you want to be anyway? In my opinion, there ARE no sides, you are a person. End of story. ./^\_/^\ \< o | o \> .\<\_ | \_\> - Trivial tripe pisses me off… …\U/ ---
**Author:** ![TVeblen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/4bbf92/32.png) [@TVeblen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TVeblen)\ **Post date:** [December 25, 1999, 12:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-feminine-sides/12278/33 "1999-12-25T00:56:00Z")
The most unselfconsciously _masculine_ man I ever met worried the least about what other people–male or female–thought. He was medium height at most, “everyday work” strong, and totally at ease whatever the company. Jim could amble in anywhere, bearded, comfy jeans etc. into _any_ company and be completely comfortable in himself. He was a great pal, and a real example for letting _go_ already of a lot of the gender stereotypes. We shared an office in grad school, and I remember a long goof-off discussion about skin care while a blizzard raged outside. (He was also a pilot and we speculated about thin, dry air aggravating dry skin itch.) This topic rang memories because Jim habitually used baby oil and baby powder. Yep, this casual-as-hell, secure guy smelled lightly of talc and baby oil. When twitted about it, he’d laugh right back with some comment about jock itch that (effortlessly a gentleman) he never quite let me hear. IMO, real men don’t worry about what’s sissy and real women don’t worry about hair poofing. Veb ---
**Author:** ![Geoffrey\_F](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/e56c9b/32.png) [@Geoffrey\_F](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Geoffrey_F)\ **Post date:** [December 25, 1999, 10:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-feminine-sides/12278/34 "1999-12-25T22:02:00Z")
Damn right…! ---
**Author:** ![system](https://global.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/original/2X/e/e489c3b7d8fce19c4b355dd4fc3f88cc39c34b87.png) [@system](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/system)\ **Post date:** [December 25, 1999, 11:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-feminine-sides/12278/35 "1999-12-25T23:05:00Z")
**Boris B** : “BeatNik, FlowerChild, FreeSpirit, GranolaBoy”…LOL! I am guilty as charged. But I’m not a “girly-man.” I know this because if I were, masturbation would surely be much more fun. I’d probably use a mirror. **Byzantine** : Thanks for sharing. Really, darlin’…you know I love ya, but if you’re as gaseous as you describe, well…I guess I’m just as glad it’s a long-distance relationship. Sin seriously, _SillyCybern_ ---
**Author:** ![SSgtBaloo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ac91a4/32.png) [@SSgtBaloo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SSgtBaloo)\ **Post date:** [December 26, 1999, 12:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-feminine-sides/12278/36 "1999-12-26T00:35:00Z")
[Glances nervously at notebook.] Erm… okay! Let me see if I’ve got this straight. To show my feminine side, I’ve gotta give up relieving internal pressure (audibly, anyhow) and take more frequent baths? I’ll make a deal. I’ll bathe more frequently (minimum of once/week) and try to cut down on the beans, and that’s it. Fair 'nuff? \ [http://www.geocities.com/Area51/Shire/8641/BearLaugh.gif](http://www.geocities.com/Area51/Shire/8641/BearLaugh.gif) \ * * * I once lost my corkscrew and had to live on food and water for several days -W.C. Fields [http://members.tripod.com/~Bob\_Baloo/index.htm](http://members.tripod.com/~Bob_Baloo/index.htm) [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-feminine-sides/12278.md?page=1)