# Men: Hot and lousy in bed or ugly and great in bed? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [February 10, 2008, 11:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-hot-and-lousy-in-bed-or-ugly-and-great-in-bed/437091 "2008-02-10T23:13:26Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Cluricaun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/bb73d2/32.png) [@Cluricaun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cluricaun)\ **Post date:** [February 11, 2008, 10:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-hot-and-lousy-in-bed-or-ugly-and-great-in-bed/437091/41 "2008-02-11T22:04:16Z")
[QUOTE=Mosier] Being good in bed is not about technique. You cant teach a robot to be good in bed. It’s an emotional, mental, and psychological combination of factors that are all part of a person’s personality. Women who are good in bed aren’t good just because someone taught them the right way to wiggle. [/QUOTE] But that doesn’t hurt. ---
**Author:** ![jaydotbeedot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/54ee81/32.png) [@jaydotbeedot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jaydotbeedot)\ **Post date:** [February 11, 2008, 10:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-hot-and-lousy-in-bed-or-ugly-and-great-in-bed/437091/42 "2008-02-11T22:26:40Z")
[QUOTE=jjimm] If someone told me that the donkey in the field down the street gave the best, most technically adept, and satisfying blowjob in the world, I wouldn’t put my dick in the donkey’s mouth, because I don’t fancy donkeys. [/QUOTE] This reminds me of a question related to the OP’s, or a more specific one: It’s been my impression, purely anecdotal, that if it’s only a blowjob under consideration, then straight guys’ standards for the women they find acceptable get adjusted rapidly and drastically downward. True? ---
**Author:** ![Gestalt](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/90ced4/32.png) [@Gestalt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gestalt)\ **Post date:** [February 11, 2008, 10:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-hot-and-lousy-in-bed-or-ugly-and-great-in-bed/437091/43 "2008-02-11T22:38:53Z")
Hmm, the replies here are quite interesting, and not at all what I would expect. Although I think **Mosier** has the most interesting point, when he argues that women who are bad in bed probably have some kind of personality issue to accompany that . . . like insecure about their perfect bodies, or had a bad sexual experience early on in their sex life, etc. Maybe the results were skewed because I put both women at such extremes of attractiveness. Let’s try to make this more scientific. Let’s say on a scale of 1 to 10, the hot one in this scenario was a 10 in appearance and a 1 in sex skillz, and the other woman was vice versa. What if it were 5/7 and 7/5? Would the difference then between the two women even be significant? 3/8 and 8/3? Gestalt ---
**Author:** ![Projammer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/projammer/32/559_2.png) [@Projammer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Projammer)\ **Post date:** [February 12, 2008, 3:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-hot-and-lousy-in-bed-or-ugly-and-great-in-bed/437091/44 "2008-02-12T03:33:54Z")
For some reason this [video](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xYi_35Y0CXs) immediately jumped to mind. But to answer the OP, hot chick. Why? Because when I’m walking around with her on my arm all the other hot chicks are going to be wondering what I’ve got going on to be keeping her interested. And more than a few of them will consider it a personal challenge to lure me away. ---
**Author:** ![Malienation](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/4af34b/32.png) [@Malienation](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malienation)\ **Post date:** [February 12, 2008, 3:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-hot-and-lousy-in-bed-or-ugly-and-great-in-bed/437091/45 "2008-02-12T03:36:58Z")
[QUOTE=Gestalt] Hmm, the replies here are quite interesting, and not at all what I would expect. Although I think **Mosier** has the most interesting point, when he argues that women who are bad in bed probably have some kind of personality issue to accompany that . . . like insecure about their perfect bodies, or had a bad sexual experience early on in their sex life, etc. Maybe the results were skewed because I put both women at such extremes of attractiveness. Let’s try to make this more scientific. Let’s say on a scale of 1 to 10, the hot one in this scenario was a 10 in appearance and a 1 in sex skillz, and the other woman was vice versa. What if it were 5/7 and 7/5? Would the difference then between the two women even be significant? 3/8 and 8/3? Gestalt [/QUOTE] I stand by my answer regardless. Always choose skills over looks. Wanna look? That’s what internet porn is for. ---
**Author:** ![Typo\_Negative](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/typo_negative/32/484_2.png) [@Typo\_Negative](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Typo_Negative)\ **Post date:** [February 12, 2008, 3:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-hot-and-lousy-in-bed-or-ugly-and-great-in-bed/437091/46 "2008-02-12T03:56:44Z")
I would have to be attracted to her to sleep with her. (duh?) But what I consider attractive is a little different than the norm. It does not normally include what is generally considered “hot”. ---
**Author:** ![BellRungBookShut-CandleSnuffed](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/bcef8e/32.png) [@BellRungBookShut-CandleSnuffed](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BellRungBookShut-CandleSnuffed)\ **Post date:** [February 12, 2008, 6:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-hot-and-lousy-in-bed-or-ugly-and-great-in-bed/437091/47 "2008-02-12T06:03:40Z")
[QUOTE=Beware of Doug] Look at Susan again. She looks a lot better now. Right? Now look at Susan’s [“O” face](http://www.cockedandlocked.net/images/Estrich.jpg). Eek. [/QUOTE] Ah, the internet. Introducing me to pictures that hurt me since goatse. Shit, I’d rank the painfulness of that link with pictures from [rotten.com](http://rotten.com). If I had to choose between her and a broken bloody femur protruding from someone’s leg as my desktop bg, I’d need a minute to think about it. Christ, I half expected that picture to come poppin outa the monitor like the evil painting from Ghostbusters II and start sucking on my soul. If I were having sex with that and the O time came and that’s what it came as, I’d have to set up a steak dinner outside my pants to coax my dick out of the vagina my crotch had become. I’d have to undergo years of therapy before having sex again, and even then the slightest unrelated facial expression from my subsequent partners would have me huddling in the corner because of the PTSD of that mug coming out of nowhere at me. I’d worry about going to sleep because I’d be afraid the face would be there, horribly burned and chasing me with razor fingernails on a glove. I guess what I’m trying to say is, that picture dented my brain. Please never do anything like that ever again. The world thanks you. ---
**Author:** ![dmatsch](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/3be4f8/32.png) [@dmatsch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dmatsch)\ **Post date:** [February 12, 2008, 7:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-hot-and-lousy-in-bed-or-ugly-and-great-in-bed/437091/48 "2008-02-12T19:16:43Z")
[QUOTE=Gestalt] That’s a little hard to answer; I want to say, “As ugly as possible with sex still being conceivable.” But if that answer is unsatisfactory, let’s just say totally unattractive features, no disfigurements of any kind. Gestalt. [/QUOTE] The words “ugly”, “sex”, “conceive” and “possible” do not belong in the same sentence, and I would thank you to re-word. You are now returned to your regularly scheduled program… ---
**Author:** ![Gus\_Gusterson](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/85f322/32.png) [@Gus\_Gusterson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gus_Gusterson)\ **Post date:** [February 12, 2008, 7:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-hot-and-lousy-in-bed-or-ugly-and-great-in-bed/437091/49 "2008-02-12T19:33:08Z")
[QUOTE=jaydotbeedot] This reminds me of a question related to the OP’s, or a more specific one: It’s been my impression, purely anecdotal, that if it’s only a blowjob under consideration, then straight guys’ standards for the women they find acceptable get adjusted rapidly and drastically downward. True? [/QUOTE] Most definitely. For example, the woman in the office around the corner from me is homely, overweight, has thinning hair, and I don’t like her much. I would never even consider putting my penis into her. But if she walked over and offered me a no-strings-attached blowjob (and I weren’t married), I would take her up on it. For me, the difference is that the only contact in a blowjob is her hands and mouth, and those are fairly standardized. I can close my eyes and pretend that she’s an attractive woman (and, for that matter, I could probably allow a guy to do it). But if we had sex there would be lots of contact with parts that are probably going to repulse me. It’s quite possible that in the heat of the moment I wouldn’t find it as repulsive as I imagine, but the thought of it turns me off enough to prevent the heat from rising in the first place. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Fight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/90ced4/32.png) [@Cat\_Fight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Fight)\ **Post date:** [February 12, 2008, 7:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-hot-and-lousy-in-bed-or-ugly-and-great-in-bed/437091/50 "2008-02-12T19:38:33Z")
Well, looks like I’ll be turning gay after all! This thread is a great partner to the blow job thread. Don’t you realize the womenfolk will now be working on their looks rather than their BJ technique after they read this? I mean, unless they’re one of those lucky homely ones you would let suck you off if you could keep your eyes closed. ---
**Author:** ![OneCentStamp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/13edae/32.png) [@OneCentStamp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OneCentStamp)\ **Post date:** [February 12, 2008, 7:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-hot-and-lousy-in-bed-or-ugly-and-great-in-bed/437091/51 "2008-02-12T19:48:54Z")
I’d stay home and jack off to a good movie. ---
**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\ **Post date:** [February 12, 2008, 7:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-hot-and-lousy-in-bed-or-ugly-and-great-in-bed/437091/52 "2008-02-12T19:52:28Z")
[QUOTE=OneCentStamp] I’d stay home and jack off to a good movie. [/QUOTE] Citizen Kane? West Side Story? I’m so there with you. ---
**Author:** ![OneCentStamp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/13edae/32.png) [@OneCentStamp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OneCentStamp)\ **Post date:** [February 12, 2008, 8:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-hot-and-lousy-in-bed-or-ugly-and-great-in-bed/437091/53 "2008-02-12T20:06:08Z")
[QUOTE=tdn] Citizen Kane? West Side Story? I’m so there with you. [/QUOTE] I was thinking more along the lines of _Patton_ or _Das Boot_, but we could definitely make it a double feature. ---
**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\ **Post date:** [February 12, 2008, 8:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-hot-and-lousy-in-bed-or-ugly-and-great-in-bed/437091/54 "2008-02-12T20:10:10Z")
Excellent. I love jerking off to Nazis. ---
**Author:** ![OneCentStamp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/13edae/32.png) [@OneCentStamp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OneCentStamp)\ **Post date:** [February 12, 2008, 8:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-hot-and-lousy-in-bed-or-ugly-and-great-in-bed/437091/55 "2008-02-12T20:14:44Z")
[QUOTE=tdn] Excellent. I love jerking off to Nazis. [/QUOTE] I knew it! It’s you who’s keeping Ann Coulter on the bestseller lists! ---
**Author:** ![jjimm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ba8739/32.png) [@jjimm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jjimm)\ **Post date:** [February 12, 2008, 8:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-hot-and-lousy-in-bed-or-ugly-and-great-in-bed/437091/56 "2008-02-12T20:22:44Z")
Kudos to the last five posts. I am wiping my eyes from laughing so hard. ---
**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\ **Post date:** [February 12, 2008, 8:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-hot-and-lousy-in-bed-or-ugly-and-great-in-bed/437091/57 "2008-02-12T20:33:19Z")
[QUOTE=OneCentStamp] I knew it! It’s you who’s keeping Ann Coulter on the bestseller lists! [/QUOTE] Eww. ---
**Author:** ![Alex\_Dubinsky](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/dbc845/32.png) [@Alex\_Dubinsky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alex_Dubinsky)\ **Post date:** [February 12, 2008, 9:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-hot-and-lousy-in-bed-or-ugly-and-great-in-bed/437091/58 "2008-02-12T21:30:18Z")
[QUOTE=Mosier] Being good in bed is not about technique. You cant teach a robot to be good in bed. It’s an emotional, mental, and psychological combination of factors that are all part of a person’s personality. Women who are good in bed aren’t good just because someone taught them the right way to wiggle. [/QUOTE] Are you crazy? It IS about technique. A few other factors, sure, but technique predominates. What you said is as retarded as saying that dancing isn’t technique, or that you can’t teach someone to dance. Sure, having fun and personality will help dancing a lot too.. Anyway, I have a question. So the hot girl sucks in bed: just lies there. But does she at least look cute doing it? Eg, does she moan, etc.? If besides being bad, she also looks bored, bitchy, etc, then that’s a whole different story. ---
**Author:** ![Shagnasty](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9dc877/32.png) [@Shagnasty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shagnasty)\ **Post date:** [February 12, 2008, 9:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-hot-and-lousy-in-bed-or-ugly-and-great-in-bed/437091/59 "2008-02-12T21:41:39Z")
[QUOTE=Alex\_Dubinsky] Anyway, I have a question. So the hot girl sucks in bed: just lies there. But does she at least look cute doing it? Eg, does she moan, etc.? If besides being bad, she also looks bored, bitchy, etc, then that’s a whole different story. [/QUOTE] Putting it hard to a bored, bitchy hot chick is a fetish all on its own. At least she has a reason to be bitchy once she struggles to take on man meat like mine. That’s right bitch, take it and close your mouth for everyones sake. ---
**Author:** ![D\_Odds](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/d_odds/32/2882_2.png) [@D\_Odds](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/D_Odds)\ **Post date:** [February 12, 2008, 11:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-hot-and-lousy-in-bed-or-ugly-and-great-in-bed/437091/60 "2008-02-12T23:02:58Z")
While your user name is appropriate, I think you might be on the wrong boards, **Shagnasty**. Hustler forums are two clicks down on the left. :eek: [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-hot-and-lousy-in-bed-or-ugly-and-great-in-bed/437091.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-hot-and-lousy-in-bed-or-ugly-and-great-in-bed/437091.md?page=4)