# Men: Hot and lousy in bed or ugly and great in bed? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [February 10, 2008, 11:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-hot-and-lousy-in-bed-or-ugly-and-great-in-bed/437091 "2008-02-10T23:13:26Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 13\ **Page:** 5
**Author:** ![chowder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/977dab/32.png) [@chowder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/chowder)\ **Post date:** [February 16, 2008, 9:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-hot-and-lousy-in-bed-or-ugly-and-great-in-bed/437091/81 "2008-02-16T09:16:02Z")
[QUOTE=Cicero] And the winner is…best post IMHO. [/QUOTE] So what do I win? A blow-up rubber choir boy would be nice…the real ones are so meh, never stop screaming 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e8c25b/32.png) [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Really_Not_All_That_Bright)\ **Post date:** [February 16, 2008, 9:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-hot-and-lousy-in-bed-or-ugly-and-great-in-bed/437091/82 "2008-02-16T21:19:54Z")
I’ll add a nugget of wisdom that those of us who spent our college days in frat houses know well… “Why do ugly chicks give good head? Because they have to.” ---
**Author:** ![lobotomyboy63](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lobotomyboy63/32/2900_2.png) [@lobotomyboy63](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lobotomyboy63)\ **Post date:** [February 16, 2008, 10:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-hot-and-lousy-in-bed-or-ugly-and-great-in-bed/437091/83 "2008-02-16T22:02:12Z")
The hot one. First time—first few times—she doesn’t have to do anything but lie there if that’s what she wants. Speaking of fraterity-isms, the difference between a dog and a fox is six beers. So by simply applying some anesthesia first… ---
**Author:** ![Alex\_Dubinsky](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/dbc845/32.png) [@Alex\_Dubinsky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alex_Dubinsky)\ **Post date:** [February 17, 2008, 3:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-hot-and-lousy-in-bed-or-ugly-and-great-in-bed/437091/84 "2008-02-17T03:21:42Z")
[QUOTE=BellRungBookShut-CandleSnuffed] Ask and ye shall receive. No nudity (all the internal links to pictures are broken), but not really SFW. http:// www. [Ilsa - She Wolf of the SS - Part One](http://somethingawful.com/d/movie-reviews/ilsa-she-wolf.php) http:// www. [Ilsa - She Wolf of the SS - Part Two](http://somethingawful.com/d/movie-reviews/ilsa-she-wolf-2.php) [/QUOTE] Speaking of which, I love their 404 page: [http://www.somethingawful.com/asdf](http://www.somethingawful.com/asdf) Is that what we’re talking about? ---
**Author:** ![Qwertyasdfg](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/ecc23a/32.png) [@Qwertyasdfg](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Qwertyasdfg)\ **Post date:** [February 17, 2008, 3:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-hot-and-lousy-in-bed-or-ugly-and-great-in-bed/437091/85 "2008-02-17T03:35:30Z")
The hot one. ---
**Author:** ![BellRungBookShut-CandleSnuffed](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/bcef8e/32.png) [@BellRungBookShut-CandleSnuffed](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BellRungBookShut-CandleSnuffed)\ **Post date:** [February 17, 2008, 4:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-hot-and-lousy-in-bed-or-ugly-and-great-in-bed/437091/86 "2008-02-17T04:03:52Z")
[QUOTE=Alex\_Dubinsky] Speaking of which, I love their 404 page: [http://www.somethingawful.com/asdf](http://www.somethingawful.com/asdf) Is that what we’re talking about? [/QUOTE] No, although that’s pretty NWS as well. There used to be pictures in the links from those pages I listed showing what the article was talking about in more graphic detail. (Un)fortunately they’re gone, probably lost to when the site went down (largely) during the New Orleans flooding. I can’t remember if it was SomethingAwful or not, but some other site used to have a 404 that said, “[I have no idea what you’re talking about… so here’s a bunny with a pancake on its head.](http://images.google.com/images?hl=en&q=bunny+pancake&btnG=Search+Images&gbv=2)” I wish more websites would interject a bit of humor into their pages, kind of like Google does. It certainly improves my outlook on businesses when they do. ---
**Author:** ![Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e8c25b/32.png) [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Really_Not_All_That_Bright)\ **Post date:** [February 17, 2008, 4:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-hot-and-lousy-in-bed-or-ugly-and-great-in-bed/437091/87 "2008-02-17T04:40:52Z")
[QUOTE=BellRungBookShut-CandleSnuffed] I can’t remember if it was SomethingAwful or not, but some other site used to have a 404 that said, “[I have no idea what you’re talking about… so here’s a bunny with a pancake on its head.](http://images.google.com/images?hl=en&q=bunny+pancake&btnG=Search+Images&gbv=2)” [/QUOTE] Best [404 page](http://www.homestarrunner.com/systemisdown.html) EVA! (requires Flash) ---
**Author:** ![Mister\_Rik](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mister_rik/32/491_2.png) [@Mister\_Rik](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mister_Rik)\ **Post date:** [February 17, 2008, 7:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-hot-and-lousy-in-bed-or-ugly-and-great-in-bed/437091/88 "2008-02-17T07:41:05Z")
[QUOTE=Really Not All That Bright] Best [404 page](http://www.homestarrunner.com/systemisdown.html) EVA! [/QUOTE] [Here’s mine](http://www.phase42.net/404.html). ---
**Author:** ![Namkcalb](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/c89c15/32.png) [@Namkcalb](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Namkcalb)\ **Post date:** [July 26, 2011, 5:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-hot-and-lousy-in-bed-or-ugly-and-great-in-bed/437091/89 "2011-07-26T05:12:58Z")
I’ll choose the pretty one. It’s dishonest to engage in such an intimate act if you are fantasising about someone prettier. ---
**Author:** ![Jaledin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/f9ae1b/32.png) [@Jaledin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jaledin)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2011, 1:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-hot-and-lousy-in-bed-or-ugly-and-great-in-bed/437091/90 "2011-07-27T01:36:10Z")
Sure, but when you donkey punch them, their heads come right off, the ugly ones. They smell bad, and, sometimes, if you go deep, you can feel intestine with the tip of your dick. The sight of rotting putrescence isn’t for me on the end of my wang – I’m cool with menstrual blood and vaginal discharge of many kinds, but ixnay on the ottenray for me. And what’s with all that groaning from the REALLY far gone? I know women can be very bright no matter what their appearance, but do they really cream for a brainy man ALL the time? Get a life, go watch some Elvira. ---
**Author:** ![Indistinguishable](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/90ced4/32.png) [@Indistinguishable](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Indistinguishable)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2011, 6:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-hot-and-lousy-in-bed-or-ugly-and-great-in-bed/437091/91 "2011-07-27T18:50:42Z")
> [@Jaledin](#): > > Sure, but when you donkey punch them, their heads come right off, the ugly ones. They smell bad, and, sometimes, if you go deep, you can feel intestine with the tip of your dick. The sight of rotting putrescence isn’t for me on the end of my wang – I’m cool with menstrual blood and vaginal discharge of many kinds, but ixnay on the ottenray for me. > > And what’s with all that groaning from the REALLY far gone? I know women can be very bright no matter what their appearance, but do they really cream for a brainy man ALL the time? Get a life, go watch some Elvira. I think maybe I don’t understand what this thread is about anymore… I thought I did, but… what? ---
**Author:** ![Malacandra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Malacandra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malacandra)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2011, 7:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-hot-and-lousy-in-bed-or-ugly-and-great-in-bed/437091/92 "2011-07-27T19:06:19Z")
> [@Indistinguishable](#): > > I think maybe I don’t understand what this thread is about anymore… I thought I did, but… what? It’s a zombie joke - this thread has been three years a-mouldering in its grave. O’course, the OP assumes that neither of the two options presented would actually be an improvement… :dubious: ---
**Author:** ![Indistinguishable](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/90ced4/32.png) [@Indistinguishable](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Indistinguishable)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2011, 7:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-hot-and-lousy-in-bed-or-ugly-and-great-in-bed/437091/93 "2011-07-27T19:12:55Z")
Oh!:smack: Thanks for the explanation. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-hot-and-lousy-in-bed-or-ugly-and-great-in-bed/437091.md?page=4)