# Men, How Many Blowjobs Have You Received This Month? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [April 28, 2011, 1:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-how-many-blowjobs-have-you-received-this-month/579983 "2011-04-28T01:29:29Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Smeghead](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f1d935/32.png) [@Smeghead](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Smeghead)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2011, 12:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-how-many-blowjobs-have-you-received-this-month/579983/21 "2011-04-28T12:46:52Z")
[Just 'cause](http://www.theonion.com/articles/why-do-all-these-homosexuals-keep-sucking-my-cock,10861/) ---
**Author:** ![bouv](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/bc8723/32.png) [@bouv](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bouv)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2011, 1:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-how-many-blowjobs-have-you-received-this-month/579983/22 "2011-04-28T13:39:22Z")
0, unshaved. My current girlfriend doesn’t do oral…at all (actually, pretty much all but one of my GF’s seemed to have this policy…I have the worst luck with getting BJs.) Hell, I think I’ve only had sex once in the past month, too. ☹ ---
**Author:** ![corkboard](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e9bcb4/32.png) [@corkboard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/corkboard)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2011, 2:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-how-many-blowjobs-have-you-received-this-month/579983/23 "2011-04-28T14:01:02Z")
I forget, 4-5 I think. But as for that unsubstantiated claim, the frequency with which my wife goes downtown is unaffected by how hairy (or not) I am; she’s cool like that. I just shave the boys out of consideration for her, not to get more oral. ---
**Author:** ![Ura-Maru](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/51bf81/32.png) [@Ura-Maru](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ura-Maru)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2011, 2:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-how-many-blowjobs-have-you-received-this-month/579983/24 "2011-04-28T14:01:28Z")
> [@BellRungBookShut-CandleSnuffed](#): > > Don Juan and Cassanova may’ve come out +0. Maybe Ron Jeremy too 😉 Bah. Bah, I say! You don’t need to be a porn star or mythical. Assume you start having sex at 18, because we don’t want to go to jail. You’re in the young, high energy stage, but you’re single a good part of the time, so we’ll be conservative and assume 2 per month, with extremely high variance. At 24, you get married to a nice girl, who, fortunately for you, likes wangs. Given you’re newlyweds and you’re both young and enthusiastic, your average shoots way up, pardon the expression. You’re up to three a week. By 27, things have settled down a bit. Stuff at work, kid on the way, you know how the song goes. But, a man makes time for whats important to him, and a woman, too. You’re average drops to a respectable twice a week, a sustainable average you can keep up for a good while. By 38, you’re both starting to slow down a bit. Once a week or so is all you’re up for, pardon the expression again. By 45, you’re down to every other week, and by 55, it’s once a month or so. By 75, you’re just no longer up for much of anything at all. Then on your 85th birthday, you die in a freak jet skiing accident. That gives you a lifetime monthly average of 2.423529412 per. And there’s no reason you have to have a drop-off that rapidly, many people maintain twice a week or higher well into their 60s. – This assumes you have an available, sexually compatible partner for the majority of your life. That’s not the average case, but it does happen. ---
**Author:** ![MrDibble](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mrdibble/32/114_2.png) [@MrDibble](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MrDibble)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2011, 2:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-how-many-blowjobs-have-you-received-this-month/579983/25 "2011-04-28T14:03:02Z")
Not shaved + More than you can possibly imagine. Although I’m sure it’s not \*actually \*that hard to imagine a number in, shall we say, the mid-to-high-twenties. I should add this has been an unusually frequent month, but it’d be in the teens at least most any month. ---
**Author:** ![Oredigger77](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/oredigger77/32/3181_2.png) [@Oredigger77](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Oredigger77)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2011, 3:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-how-many-blowjobs-have-you-received-this-month/579983/26 "2011-04-28T15:10:44Z")
I almost got one this month but the girl I went to visit decided to break it off the day before and the new girl I met declined on our second date (the third won’t be until next month). I’m trimmed but I figure that’s closer to shaved then not. ---
**Author:** ![fusoya](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/ecccb3/32.png) [@fusoya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/fusoya)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2011, 3:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-how-many-blowjobs-have-you-received-this-month/579983/27 "2011-04-28T15:20:34Z")
The last time I got one was 2003. Don’t particularly care for them, and neither do about half the girls I’ve been with. ---
**Author:** ![Malacandra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Malacandra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malacandra)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2011, 3:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-how-many-blowjobs-have-you-received-this-month/579983/28 "2011-04-28T15:49:23Z")
> [@bouv](#): > > 0, unshaved. > > My current girlfriend doesn’t do oral…at all (actually, pretty much all but one of my GF’s seemed to have this policy…I have the worst luck with getting BJs.) Hell, I think I’ve only had sex once in the past month, too. ☹ Have a beer? ☹ ---
**Author:** ![Daerlyn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/898d66/32.png) [@Daerlyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Daerlyn)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2011, 8:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-how-many-blowjobs-have-you-received-this-month/579983/29 "2011-04-28T20:43:14Z")
The lawn does not need to be mown right down, but the shrubbery should be maintained. ---
**Author:** ![Yaxche](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/8dc957/32.png) [@Yaxche](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Yaxche)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2011, 9:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-how-many-blowjobs-have-you-received-this-month/579983/30 "2011-04-28T21:16:04Z")
Answered zero, but I think that has more to do with being married than with the state of my pubes… ---
**Author:** ![Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/qadgop_the_mercotan/32/83_2.png) [@Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Qadgop_the_Mercotan)\ **Post date:** [April 29, 2011, 1:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-how-many-blowjobs-have-you-received-this-month/579983/31 "2011-04-29T01:18:55Z")
To completion, or as a part of foreplay? I’ll assume either counts as I add up my totals. ---
**Author:** ![Count\_Blucher](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/c5a1d2/32.png) [@Count\_Blucher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Count_Blucher)\ **Post date:** [April 29, 2011, 3:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-how-many-blowjobs-have-you-received-this-month/579983/32 "2011-04-29T03:07:07Z")
If it’d up me from zero, I’d zoot the hirsute & give curlies [the boot](http://bit.ly/mJ6TTB). ---
**Author:** ![Shagnasty](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9dc877/32.png) [@Shagnasty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shagnasty)\ **Post date:** [April 29, 2011, 3:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-how-many-blowjobs-have-you-received-this-month/579983/33 "2011-04-29T03:54:12Z")
> [@Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](#): > > To completion, or as a part of foreplay? > > I’ll assume either counts as I add up my totals. This isn’t another work story is it? The Shawshank Emissions? :dubious:😃 ---
**Author:** ![Zebra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/c0e974/32.png) [@Zebra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zebra)\ **Post date:** [April 29, 2011, 4:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-how-many-blowjobs-have-you-received-this-month/579983/34 "2011-04-29T04:39:05Z")
Since I have not been on any dates I don’t think how hairy my balls are figures into it. ---
**Author:** ![Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/qadgop_the_mercotan/32/83_2.png) [@Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Qadgop_the_Mercotan)\ **Post date:** [April 29, 2011, 12:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-how-many-blowjobs-have-you-received-this-month/579983/35 "2011-04-29T12:10:30Z")
> [@Shagnasty](#): > > This isn’t another work story is it? The Shawshank Emissions? :dubious:😃 What are you suggesting? ---
**Author:** ![BigT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bigt/32/12044_2.png) [@BigT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BigT)\ **Post date:** [April 29, 2011, 2:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-how-many-blowjobs-have-you-received-this-month/579983/36 "2011-04-29T14:22:28Z")
> [@Yaxche](#): > > Answered zero, but I think that has more to do with being married than with the state of my pubes… I similarly do not think the “state of my pubes” has anything to do with it, so I didn’t vote. If the OP wants me to, I will. ---
**Author:** ![dhkendall](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a9adbd/32.png) [@dhkendall](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dhkendall)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2011, 1:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-how-many-blowjobs-have-you-received-this-month/579983/37 "2011-04-30T01:20:02Z")
Hairy and 0 (gee, never thought I’d use those terms to describe me), but I think that’s more the fact that my only sexual partner has been my wife, and she doesn’t like giving or receiving oral sex (she was a virgin when we met too, so it wasn’t from a past distasteful (no pun intended) experience or anything) so it doesn’t matter what my pubes look like, I’d still be BJ-less (ETA: Yeah, what **Yaxche** said, is it really true that gfs will blow you but wives won’t?) ---
**Author:** ![dhkendall](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a9adbd/32.png) [@dhkendall](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dhkendall)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2011, 1:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-how-many-blowjobs-have-you-received-this-month/579983/38 "2011-04-30T01:22:48Z")
> [@Oredigger77](#): > > I almost got one this month but the girl I went to visit decided to break it off the day before OUCH! :eek: I’d say that’ll affect your chances in subsequent months. (Must’ve been a nasty breakup!) ---
**Author:** ![Count\_Blucher](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/c5a1d2/32.png) [@Count\_Blucher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Count_Blucher)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2011, 1:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-how-many-blowjobs-have-you-received-this-month/579983/39 "2011-04-30T01:59:49Z")
> [@dhkendall](#): > > OUCH! :eek: I’d say that’ll affect your chances in subsequent months. (Must’ve been a nasty breakup!) …or a close shave. ---
**Author:** ![WhyNot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c77e96/32.png) [@WhyNot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WhyNot)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2011, 2:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-how-many-blowjobs-have-you-received-this-month/579983/40 "2011-04-30T02:08:33Z")
> [@BigT](#): > > I similarly do not think the “state of my pubes” has anything to do with it, so I didn’t vote. If the OP wants me to, I will. As the OP…sure, why not? After all, we’re not interested in why you think you get more blowjobs - we’re checking the correlation of blow jobs and shaved pubes that some people think occurs. That’s also why I carefully did not define my terms. If someone makes the claim, “I shave my junk because dudes who shave their junk get more blowjobs,” then “shave”, “junk” and even “blowjobs” are all subjective terms. What do they mean by “shave”? Does trimming count? Blowjobs to completion or as foreplay? I don’t know. So anyone answering the poll should use their own definitions, and maybe we’ll get an approximation of what people making the claim mean. I mean, we all know this is about as scientific as My Little Pony, right? 😃 [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-how-many-blowjobs-have-you-received-this-month/579983.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-how-many-blowjobs-have-you-received-this-month/579983.md?page=3)