# men, take some responsibility for your own damned healthcare **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [June 1, 2004, 2:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-take-some-responsibility-for-your-own-damned-healthcare/248066 "2004-06-01T14:18:47Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![catsix](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e19b73/32.png) [@catsix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/catsix)\ **Post date:** [June 2, 2004, 1:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-take-some-responsibility-for-your-own-damned-healthcare/248066/21 "2004-06-02T01:29:49Z")
> [@](#): > > **Exgineer** said: > You have to have regular visits to the gynecologist, You do? It may be what’s recommended, but that doesn’t mean every woman does it. I’m personally more in the camp of finding a doctor if I feel I might croak within the next twenty four hours. My mom’s a lot like that too, so perhaps that’s why she doesn’t make dadsix go to the doctor much. I did have a cousin (guy) who was at the doctor all the damn time, and he’d nag me to go if I got the slightest sniffle. It usually seems like those who go to doctors more (for whatever reason) find it more important that others go to doctors more often. As always, actual mileage may vary slightly from advertisement. ---
**Author:** ![wonky](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wonky/32/393_2.png) [@wonky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wonky)\ **Post date:** [June 2, 2004, 2:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-take-some-responsibility-for-your-own-damned-healthcare/248066/22 "2004-06-02T02:50:42Z")
> [@Exgineer](#): > > I figure, if I’m not coughing up blood I’m probably okay Then you are an idiot. If you went to the ER with heart symptoms, the first thing they’d do is take a blood sample. They’d be looking for enzymes that signal that your heart is suffering damage. His tests came back _positive_. Are you really that clueless that you think having heart damage is “histrionics”? Did you notice where I said that > [@](#): > > He tells me he needs to see his doctor because “his heart rate is staying really fast.” ?? Or did you just conveniently overlook that in order to play up your machismo? ---
**Author:** ![wonky](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wonky/32/393_2.png) [@wonky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wonky)\ **Post date:** [June 2, 2004, 2:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-take-some-responsibility-for-your-own-damned-healthcare/248066/23 "2004-06-02T02:53:13Z")
> [@catsix](#): > > It usually seems like those who go to doctors more (for whatever reason) find it more important that others go to doctors more often. As always, actual mileage may vary slightly from advertisement. I never voluntarily go to the doctor, but then I’m healthy as a horse. My husband _insists_ on going to the doctor, and should go to the doctor, he just won’t make the appointments himself. ---
**Author:** ![catsix](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e19b73/32.png) [@catsix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/catsix)\ **Post date:** [June 2, 2004, 2:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-take-some-responsibility-for-your-own-damned-healthcare/248066/24 "2004-06-02T02:55:53Z")
Well then he deserves to be throttled with the handset as you choke him with the cord. ---
**Author:** ![wonky](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wonky/32/393_2.png) [@wonky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wonky)\ **Post date:** [June 2, 2004, 2:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-take-some-responsibility-for-your-own-damned-healthcare/248066/25 "2004-06-02T02:56:06Z")
> [@Coldfire](#): > > The dude’s got a resting heart rate of 1 fucking 30. I’m amazed they let him out of the ER. :eek: > It’s supposed to be around 60 in rest, isn’t it? They didn’t let him out of the ER. They kept him overnight, wanted to keep him longer, and didn’t let him go until his heart rate was about 70. But that was too late for his heart muscle, apparently. 60-90 I think would be considered “normal to high normal” at rest. ---
**Author:** ![CWN](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/bc79bd/32.png) [@CWN](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CWN)\ **Post date:** [June 2, 2004, 3:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-take-some-responsibility-for-your-own-damned-healthcare/248066/26 "2004-06-02T03:01:54Z")
Have not read all the posts (Perhaps I should have) When my wife was dying of Melonoma (sp) she could or would not talk to the DR’s so when we had a visit the DR’s they would ask her questions and look to me to answer. not all men are that way Still love and miss her /Passed away on 7/11/86 our anniversary ---
**Author:** ![wonky](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wonky/32/393_2.png) [@wonky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wonky)\ **Post date:** [June 2, 2004, 3:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-take-some-responsibility-for-your-own-damned-healthcare/248066/27 "2004-06-02T03:08:52Z")
**CWN** , you’re right that all men aren’t that way. But there are enough of them to piss me the heck off. Sorry to hear about your wife. That had to have been extremely difficult. ---
**Author:** ![Cerri](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/3bc359/32.png) [@Cerri](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cerri)\ **Post date:** [June 2, 2004, 8:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-take-some-responsibility-for-your-own-damned-healthcare/248066/28 "2004-06-02T08:13:33Z")
> [@catsix](#): > > You do? > > It may be what’s recommended, but that doesn’t mean every woman does it. I’m personally more in the camp of finding a doctor if I feel I might croak within the next twenty four hours. Put me as a woman in that camp as well, but it’s only cause I can’t afford a doctor anymore than I can afford health insurance. =p ---
**Author:** ![Aeschines](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aeschines/32/16251_2.png) [@Aeschines](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Aeschines)\ **Post date:** [June 2, 2004, 8:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-take-some-responsibility-for-your-own-damned-healthcare/248066/29 "2004-06-02T08:21:32Z")
Good luck with the health issues. They are always a challenge. ---
**Author:** ![kambuckta](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/53a042/32.png) [@kambuckta](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kambuckta)\ **Post date:** [June 2, 2004, 10:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-take-some-responsibility-for-your-own-damned-healthcare/248066/30 "2004-06-02T10:13:37Z")
> [@Tinkertoy](#): > > **jsgoddess** been there done that. Combine it with the phrase “I’m a man I can take it” and your living with my hubby. > T: I think you should have the doctor look at your ankle. > H: It’s fine it’s just sprained. > T: I think it may be broken. > H: It’s fine don’t worry. > T: It’s three times it’s regular size, and purple! > H: I said it’s fine. > T: Ok! But the bone is sticking out. > H: I’m a man I can take it. That’s all well and good, but why is it that when a bloke gets a minor sniffle, he takes himself to bed for a week and swears to Og that he is _dying_ from pneumonia. Explain THAT one to me. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![duffer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/duffer/32/1026_2.png) [@duffer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/duffer)\ **Post date:** [June 2, 2004, 10:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-take-some-responsibility-for-your-own-damned-healthcare/248066/31 "2004-06-02T10:56:53Z")
> [@jsgoddess](#): > > Right. So I should _happily_ waste my time and the time of various doctors and support staff so that he can _happily_ not take charge of his own health? > > Oh, and I should _happily_ accept that mistranslations may happen and should _happily_ accept blame when they do? > > And when I’m _happily_ driving my husband to the hospital because he’s oh-so-_happily_ suffering from a racing heart, I should just be happy that I get that privilege? > > How much of my life am I supposed to spend, _happily_ doing something that I can’t do well or safely? Remember, we’re talking about someone with a very fucking huge medical problem, someone who has to go to the doctor constantly. Just precisely how many times am I supposed to interrupt my day not just calling these doctors, but calling to correct errors that were introduced by the last fucking time I called? > > Now, if possible, I’m even more pissed off than I was. How about _happily_ hoping he dies soon so you don’t have to put up with his shit? What the fuck, you talk to a nurse or two and assume 1 out of 2 men are too stupid or belligerant to see a doctor when the shit hits the fan? I haven’t seen a doctor in almost 8 years now. (Other than my wife’s OB/GYN) I haven’t broken any bones, bouts of flu, bronchitis and a sprained ankle were taken care of by riding them out. Hence, no reason to see a doctor. Yeah, us guys can be pig-headed, but it’s a guy thing. We expect you to understand this as much as we expect you to not understand that we don’t know what the hell PMS is all about. There, now that I’ve tried to defend men, get him to take care of himself! Even if you have to leash him and drive him to his appointments. The heart is nothing to play around with (in all ways). It’s not like one kidney is going bad and he has a backup. Good luck with it, and better health to him. ---
**Author:** ![Earthworm\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/f07891/32.png) [@Earthworm\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Earthworm_Jim)\ **Post date:** [June 2, 2004, 11:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-take-some-responsibility-for-your-own-damned-healthcare/248066/32 "2004-06-02T11:09:33Z")
Seems to me there’s two pittings going on here: 1. Men in general, and their lackadaisical self-health-care practices (with exceptions as noted by **kambuckta** ). 2. **Mr. jsgoddess** specifically. As for 2 - well, the boy has definitely crossed the line into ‘genuinely needs health care’ and my comment about the defibrillator was out of line. I thought the bit about ‘heart being damaged’ in the OP was exaggeration (I hit reply before reading anything else). So, sorry about that. But as for 1 - well, > [@kambuckta](#): > > That’s all well and good, but why is it that when a bloke gets a minor sniffle, he takes himself to bed for a week and swears to Og that he is _dying_ from pneumonia. > > Explain THAT one to me. 😃 Pah. He is not a **real** man. Real men go to work with 103-degree fever. Not only is this because we can take it, but also because we can lord our illness over our scared & weak coworkers. “Do as I say, or I will cough on you!! MWAHAHAHA!!!” ---
**Author:** ![Shirley\_Ujest](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/45deac/32.png) [@Shirley\_Ujest](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shirley_Ujest)\ **Post date:** [June 2, 2004, 1:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-take-some-responsibility-for-your-own-damned-healthcare/248066/33 "2004-06-02T13:34:28Z")
This is so very true. Example: **Hijack, but I have to unload.** My FIL was recently in the hospital for about 17 days with problems relating to scar tissue build up in his urethra (he is paralized from the waist down and has to cath.) and he had 1) a nasty UTI ( it was basically milk coming out of him) and 2) he wasn’t pooping ( and he has to have enemas any way to poop and nothing is coming out for over ten days. So, he was full of shit on so many different levels. He has his urethra taken care of, the poop stuff straightened out and during one of the roto-rooter jobbies up into his guts, its discovered he has a cyst that is the cause of the poop problems. so, he gets that drained and he is kept in the hospital for a the aforementioned time because if this problem had happened 10-15 years ago, he would probably be dead as the medicine /equip is better now and he has excellent insurance. He is released with the understanding that he has to have a colonostopy (sp?) in the very near future for whatever reasons. that I cannot remember as I tend to glaze over when this stuff comes up. On the discharge sheet it says **No Red Meat**. My husband, FIL and SIL all heard this and read this. My MIL (who is slightly detached) missed this and despite being 60 years old and can cook like nobody’s business, does not know what red meat is. :rolleyes: She cooks a big greasy three red-meat meal for Memorial Day. After the meal, we are all watching a movie and somehow the following conversation took place: Husband: Dad, you know you are having a colonosopy next week. FIL: Yeah. Husband: The doctor said no red meat. MIL: He needs some meat on him, he’s too thin. ( Like shit, he needs to lose weight to make the transfers from chair to bed/car seat easier on him. He’s 62, 5’10 and about 200 right now.) SIL: It says on your sheet No Red Meat. FIL: I know. I haven’t had any. MIL: What’s red meat? I don’t cook no red meat. Listen for the sound of Shirley’s optic nerve snapping as she rolls her eyes hard and see the blood spurting from my mouth as I bite my tongue in half. Husband: Daaad, what did you eat for dinner tonight? FIL: Oh, I had a hamburger…(beat) actually two, they were pretty good. They don’t cook like that in the hospital. If I could capture these moments on film, it would probably help my ward attendants in the future. ---
**Author:** ![blowero](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/41988e/32.png) [@blowero](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/blowero)\ **Post date:** [June 2, 2004, 5:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-take-some-responsibility-for-your-own-damned-healthcare/248066/34 "2004-06-02T17:30:19Z")
Women - why are you such lousy drivers? I figured since we’re generalizing… ---
**Author:** ![misshannah](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/3e96dc/32.png) [@misshannah](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/misshannah)\ **Post date:** [June 2, 2004, 5:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-take-some-responsibility-for-your-own-damned-healthcare/248066/35 "2004-06-02T17:46:40Z")
> [@blowero](#): > > Women - why are you such lousy drivers? > > I figured since we’re generalizing… I am such a lousy driver because I am usually doing one of the following while driving: [ul] [li]changing my shoes[/li][li]putting on complicated eye makeup[/li][li]talking on the phone[/li][li]looking for something in the back-seat[/li][/ul] Especially because I drive a stick. I’m very contrite. ---
**Author:** ![Eva\_Luna](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/e495f1/32.png) [@Eva\_Luna](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eva_Luna)\ **Post date:** [June 2, 2004, 6:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-take-some-responsibility-for-your-own-damned-healthcare/248066/36 "2004-06-02T18:28:01Z")
> [@catsix](#): > > I’m personally more in the camp of finding a doctor if I feel I might croak within the next twenty four hours. My mileage varied like hell, so please don’t get offended if I act like your Jewish mother for a minute, OK? **Please** have regular gyno checkups. If I didn’t, I might be dying now of cervical cancer. If caught early, it’s extremely treatable (roughly 99% cure rate if caught before it becomes invasive). If not, and it becomes invasive, there is a **7%** five-year survival rate, plus fun things like possible major surgery up to and including hysterectomy in your future. Mine was caught early because of a routine annual checkup; I had no known risk factors and no prior abnormal exams. I had a relatively minor outpatient surgery, and have been fine ever since. Don’t be a statistic. ---
**Author:** ![tiny\_ham](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/a183cd/32.png) [@tiny\_ham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tiny_ham)\ **Post date:** [June 2, 2004, 6:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-take-some-responsibility-for-your-own-damned-healthcare/248066/37 "2004-06-02T18:28:58Z")
Thanks blowero, for making the obvious point. So sorry YOUR husband is making mistakes jsgoddess, but perhaps you should amend your OP? My husband is perfectly fine in this regard. He also puts the toilet seat down. And I’m a good driver, and I don’t go shoe shopping. These “Geez ladies, aren’t men just the worst?!!?!” threads are so fucking tiresome. ---
**Author:** ![wonky](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wonky/32/393_2.png) [@wonky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wonky)\ **Post date:** [June 2, 2004, 7:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-take-some-responsibility-for-your-own-damned-healthcare/248066/38 "2004-06-02T19:01:31Z")
> [@blowero](#): > > Women - why are you such lousy drivers? > > I figured since we’re generalizing… At least make your generalization analogous: “You know who you are. You drive like an idiot, swerve around, and then blame the other drivers for your accidents.” ---
**Author:** ![wonky](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wonky/32/393_2.png) [@wonky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wonky)\ **Post date:** [June 2, 2004, 7:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-take-some-responsibility-for-your-own-damned-healthcare/248066/39 "2004-06-02T19:17:21Z")
> [@jarbabyj](#): > > Thanks blowero, for making the obvious point. > > So sorry YOUR husband is making mistakes jsgoddess, but perhaps you should amend your OP? My husband is perfectly fine in this regard. Note that I said the nurses guessed 50% of men didn’t make their own appointments. Polls online say it’s closer to 40%. Your husband may fall into the group that does for himself, but there are a lot of men who don’t. And that leads to situations like the one I was in this weekend. You don’t have to trust my numbers. Talk to the receptionists and nurses at the doctors you visit. Probably not the gynecologists, of course. I am talking about those men. The ones who dump it on their wives, then complain that the timing isn’t right, or complain that the appointment isn’t soon enough, or complain that the wife didn’t convey the full range of symptoms quite perfectly. I’ve witnessed too many of these exchanges, and spent far too much time talking to people in hospitals and doctors’ offices to think that it’s solely my incredibly annoying husband who does this. ---
**Author:** ![blowero](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/41988e/32.png) [@blowero](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/blowero)\ **Post date:** [June 2, 2004, 7:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-take-some-responsibility-for-your-own-damned-healthcare/248066/40 "2004-06-02T19:51:17Z")
The only thing more annoying than people who make stupid generalizations, are those who insist on defending it. :rolleyes: [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-take-some-responsibility-for-your-own-damned-healthcare/248066.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-take-some-responsibility-for-your-own-damned-healthcare/248066.md?page=3)