# Men-what are they good for? **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [December 17, 2005, 9:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-what-are-they-good-for/336038 "2005-12-17T09:12:13Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Liz](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/liz/32/17737_2.png) [@Liz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Liz)\ **Post date:** [December 18, 2005, 12:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-what-are-they-good-for/336038/21 "2005-12-18T12:40:23Z")
Psh. A lesbian needs a man like a bicycle needs a fish. Or however that goes. Anyway. I adore men, mostly because I find my very dark, very raunchy sense of humour and heavy-on-logic-light-on-emotion pattern of thinking to be shared by a good percentage of the males I know. ---
**Author:** ![levdrakon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/49beb7/32.png) [@levdrakon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/levdrakon)\ **Post date:** [December 18, 2005, 10:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-what-are-they-good-for/336038/22 "2005-12-18T22:56:30Z")
Well, being a guy myself, I mostly just use ‘em for sex. Otherwise - I got nuttin’. I do the spider killin’, jar openin’, lightbulb changin’ and leaky faucet fixin’. But, if I ever find one that fixes cars and builds furniture, I’m gonna be all over that! ---
**Author:** ![Antigen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/848f3c/32.png) [@Antigen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Antigen)\ **Post date:** [December 18, 2005, 11:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-what-are-they-good-for/336038/23 "2005-12-18T23:32:34Z")
A man (more specifically _my_ wonderful man) is good for: Making me feel sexy even on my worst days Turning me on pretty damn well from 500 miles away and even better when he can touch me Kicking my butt with cartoon trivia Helping me out with all things geeky Kisses that zap right to my heart and make my toes curl up Getting up to turn off the bedroom fan when I’m too cold… and then getting up again to turn it back on when I decide it’s too hot without it 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![ms.deanna](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b3f665/32.png) [@ms.deanna](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ms.deanna)\ **Post date:** [December 18, 2005, 11:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-what-are-they-good-for/336038/24 "2005-12-18T23:42:00Z")
:eek: who picked the advertisements on the bottom of this thread? Oh no, you di’int!! ---
**Author:** ![Mama\_Tiger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/6de8d8/32.png) [@Mama\_Tiger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mama_Tiger)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2005, 12:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-what-are-they-good-for/336038/25 "2005-12-19T00:04:38Z")
My guy has some good selling features: - cooks and cleans quite well (except for scrubbing bathrooms; that’s my job) - does the auto maintenance - loves to shop - plays with the dogs and takes them for long walks And the past couple of days, best of all: - brought me meals and beverages in bed while I was flat on my back with bronchitis. ---
**Author:** ![Large\_Marge](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/50afbb/32.png) [@Large\_Marge](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Large_Marge)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2005, 1:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-what-are-they-good-for/336038/26 "2005-12-19T01:18:56Z")
Oh, they’re good for so many things: Just listening to me whine for a bit when I’ve had a bad day. Letting me make all the little decisions, while they make all the big ones that make my head hurt. Fixin’ my piece-of-shit cars and picking me up when one of them breaks down. Spoonin’, of course. Being the calm during one of the many storms that are my life. Fabulous and frequent spontaneous sex. Spider killin’. Oh, I miss them so. ---
**Author:** ![Grrr](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/grrr/32/146_2.png) [@Grrr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grrr)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2005, 4:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-what-are-they-good-for/336038/27 "2005-12-19T04:02:29Z")
Ladies, We’re also pretty good at handling the remote to the TV. SO good in fact,that we insist on complete and total control over it. -Because, um, you know; We would want you pretty little ladies hurting your dainty little fingres punching the buttons. Um, yeah, that’s it. HEY LOOK! A SHOE SALE… _runs out of thread_ ---
**Author:** ![Cyn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a88e4f/32.png) [@Cyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cyn)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2005, 9:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-what-are-they-good-for/336038/28 "2005-12-19T09:35:16Z")
Making me feel safe, having my back even if he’s not physically right there, but knowing he lives and breathes in my world. Letting me be a fluffly poodle of a girl, even though I threw out my own garbage and put up the Christmas tree alone and carried in the groceries for years, he lets us pretend I’m delicate. Being silly and needy and cuddly in the morning and staring down a scary strange man that jumped out at us when we stopped at McD’s that night. Men are good at that. ---
**Author:** ![CalMeacham](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/calmeacham/32/35_2.png) [@CalMeacham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CalMeacham)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2005, 12:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-what-are-they-good-for/336038/29 "2005-12-19T12:01:15Z")
My main task seems to be Killing Spiders, something I’m called on to do for both Pepper Mill and milliCal. I also get to do the yard work – grass cutting, leaf raking, and cutting up fallen trees into tiny bits. Unfotunately, pepper gets home before I do, and often gets stuck with the snow (although I’ve reapaired the snowblower recently). ---
**Author:** ![catsix](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e19b73/32.png) [@catsix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/catsix)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2005, 2:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-what-are-they-good-for/336038/30 "2005-12-19T14:43:28Z")
Apparently they are quite good for being the butt of jokes. ---
**Author:** ![norinew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/eb9ed0/32.png) [@norinew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/norinew)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2005, 2:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-what-are-they-good-for/336038/31 "2005-12-19T14:53:33Z")
Opening jars, putting the necessary patches and such on the ‘puter, selecting and setting up a Christmas gift mp3 player since I’m not technical in the least, earning a good living so I can stay home and take care of the kids (which is exactly what I wanted to do), toe-curlin’ smokin’ hot sex, keeping the bedside waste can empty with just a splash of Pine-Sol in the bottom when I’m puking my intestines up, and in one instance investigating and remedying the ever-worsening bad smell in the basement which turned out to be a dead cat (yuck!). ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2005, 3:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-what-are-they-good-for/336038/32 "2005-12-19T15:18:59Z")
> [@catsix](#): > > Apparently they are quite good for being the butt of jokes. I hope you don’t mean this thread, because I like seeing a positive thread like this to counteract all the “idiot man-child” crap we see all the time on tv. ---
**Author:** ![Rebo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rebo/32/13005_2.png) [@Rebo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rebo)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2005, 3:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-what-are-they-good-for/336038/33 "2005-12-19T15:31:51Z")
Men are good for lots of things! Mine in particular. Opening jars. Fixing everything around the house. Car maintenance. Lifting heavy things. Getting stuff that’s too high for me. Vacuuming!!! He even does windows. ---
**Author:** ![Clothahump](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/51bf81/32.png) [@Clothahump](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Clothahump)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2005, 3:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-what-are-they-good-for/336038/34 "2005-12-19T15:33:22Z")
> [@DeVena](#): > > Killing bugs (especially spiders!!) > Providing a convenient place to warm my frozen toes in bed SWMBO? Is that you? When did you start posting here? And why are you using the alias of **DeVena**? ---
**Author:** ![catsix](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e19b73/32.png) [@catsix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/catsix)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2005, 3:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-what-are-they-good-for/336038/35 "2005-12-19T15:35:48Z")
Not the entire thread, but some of the comments here have put in men as the butt of the joke: > [@](#): > > Killing bugs (especially spiders!!) > Providing a convenient place to warm my frozen toes in bed > [@](#): > > Hot lovin’. > > Not much else, really. > [@](#): > > According to my ex-wife, we’re good for taking out the garbage, killing critters that have more than four legs, and making women seem smarter. Most of the things that I’ve seen listed are actually pretty trivial things, or seem like jokes. I’m talking about things like bug killing and jar opening and checking out a noise at night. I’m surprised no one has mentioned that they fill a lot of public service roles as firefighters and police officers, to keep the public safe. Yes I know that women do these jobs too, but they are vastly outnumbered by men. ---
**Author:** ![Siege](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/dbc845/32.png) [@Siege](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Siege)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2005, 5:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-what-are-they-good-for/336038/36 "2005-12-19T17:21:21Z")
**catsix** , while it may seem trivial to you, I actually do consider it a good thing that the gentleman in my life has been known to clean the snow off my car after a visit, especially with the weather we’ve been having this month! I also think it’s rather nice that he put plastic wrap over my bedroom window to keep the heat in while I was at church yesterday even though I could have and was \*#%#! _planning_ on doing so myself. I also admit it helps having a male friend who’s over 6 feet/2 meters tall when I have to change the track lights attached to my 9 foot/3 meter high ceiling since I’m much shorter. Sheesh, lady! You claim that feminists hate men, yet, when we sing their praises, you also complain! What are men good for? Many, many good things, but what it comes down to, at least with the men I know and love, it simply comes down to this. They’re good for simply being men with all that encompasses, including the wonderful things that make them different from women. CJ ---
**Author:** ![Scumpup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ce73a5/32.png) [@Scumpup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scumpup)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2005, 5:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-what-are-they-good-for/336038/37 "2005-12-19T17:40:43Z")
They’re good for barbecue and stewing. The long, slow cooking tenderizes the meat which can be tough. If yours indulges in tobacco, or other habits which can give the meat an unpleasant flavor, you’ll probably want to spend a couple weeks purging and detoxifying him before slaughter. Since this can coincide with a fattening-up diet, it need not be considered wasted time. Simply deny him the tobacco while simultaneously offering him morsels that are high in carbs and fat; he’ll have increased appetite and consume them happily after a day or so. About one or two days before slaughter, switch over to a feeding him a lot of ripe fruit and water. ---
**Author:** ![JThunder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/e95f7d/32.png) [@JThunder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JThunder)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2005, 5:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-what-are-they-good-for/336038/38 "2005-12-19T17:45:47Z")
What are they good for? Absolutely nothing. ---
**Author:** ![catsix](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e19b73/32.png) [@catsix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/catsix)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2005, 6:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-what-are-they-good-for/336038/39 "2005-12-19T18:41:07Z")
> [@](#): > > **Siege** said: > Sheesh, lady! You claim that feminists hate men, yet, when we sing their praises, you also complain! I guess I don’t see much praise in killing bugs and getting things off of shelves. It’s just got this tone to me that what men are good for is the shit work women don’t want to do themselves. Perhaps I find it kind of sad that we even have to try and list things that nearly half the world’s population is ‘good for’, I dunno. And then as expected (by me at least) we get the jokes like ‘Absolutely nothing.’ Almost makes me wonder what kind of responses there’d be to a thread called ‘Women: what are they good for?’ ---
**Author:** ![Scumpup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ce73a5/32.png) [@Scumpup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scumpup)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2005, 7:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-what-are-they-good-for/336038/40 "2005-12-19T19:04:29Z")
> [@catsix](#): > > ‘Women: what are they good for?’ Broiling and frying. They tend to have far less of a “gamey” flavor than men. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-what-are-they-good-for/336038.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-what-are-they-good-for/336038.md?page=3)