# Men, would you be OK with your SO doing this?

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-would-you-be-ok-with-your-so-doing-this/415800>\
**Category:** In My Humble Opinion\
**Created:** [August 16, 2007, 7:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-would-you-be-ok-with-your-so-doing-this/415800 "2007-08-16T07:11:18Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 4\
**Page:** 10

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**Author:** ![control-z](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/eada6e/32.png) [@control-z](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/control-z)\
**Post date:** [September 27, 2007, 8:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-would-you-be-ok-with-your-so-doing-this/415800/181 "2007-09-27T20:41:54Z")

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It would be completely weird for my SO to sleep in the same bed with another man, gay or otherwise. That just doesn’t look right even if it is innocent.

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**Author:** ![Coil](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/bb73d2/32.png) [@Coil](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Coil)\
**Post date:** [September 28, 2007, 9:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-would-you-be-ok-with-your-so-doing-this/415800/182 "2007-09-28T09:21:46Z")

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Quite an interesting thread.

I am fascinated that there are so many of you who say that you would not have any problems with your SO sharing a bed with a friend (gay or straight).

Like a few others I am in what seems to be the minority position. I would feel very uncomfortable in almost all of the scenarios posted here.

Wife sleeping in same bed as gay male friend (who I am quite sure is gay) - outside my boundaries.  
Wife staying over at apartment of male friend but in different room - A situation I would very much prefer her to avoid.  
Wife sleeping in same bed as female friend - Ok-ish. Not in our bed though.

I hold myself to the same standards so I would not share a bed with a lesbian friend, nor stay over at a female friend’s apartment etc.

It all comes down to what the two people in a relationship are comfortable with and where their boundaries are. It is not about not trusting the SO. To me when you are in a relationship you should avoid certain things out of respect for the other person.

These include things like sleeping in the same bed as someone else.

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**Author:** ![Roboto](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/b77776/32.png) [@Roboto](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Roboto)\
**Post date:** [September 28, 2007, 9:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-would-you-be-ok-with-your-so-doing-this/415800/183 "2007-09-28T21:03:15Z")

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I wouldn’t care at all . . . if she cheats on you, then you’re lucky (assuming you somehow find out). Your wife is exposed as a cheater and you get a “get out of jail free card” to end the marriage. Now you can finally do it with someone else!

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**Author:** ![Scissorjack](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c67d28/32.png) [@Scissorjack](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scissorjack)\
**Post date:** [September 28, 2007, 9:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/men-would-you-be-ok-with-your-so-doing-this/415800/184 "2007-09-28T21:24:43Z")

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[QUOTE=SHAKES]  
Wow, I like how you put that. I remember once when I was married; my wife stayed at a female friends house. (they had been drinking and she was too drunk to drive home so I told her to sleep over.)

I later found out they had slept in the same bed together. I never said anything to my wife but this made me slightly jealous. I never really knew why untill I read your post.  
[/QUOTE]

Shall we schedule your next appointment?

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