Oh, you have got to be fucken’ kidding me!
Barely 45 minutes since I posted THIS, and it seems like I’m back on the friggin’ rags again. I DO NOT BELIEVE IT! Three months of nothing, and then RIGHT ON CUE tonight!
Please ignore all previous posts/questions/whinges. Fuck. :rolleyes:
That happens, kambucta. After fairly regular periods even when they were of weird length/heaviness, suddenly one month… nothing.
That wasn’t too bad, said I, after about 3 months.
Then … one more period after 4 months.
Then nothing.
Then … 4 months later, another period.
Then … well, you get the picture. I kept hoping and hoping that was it, and then some stupid mini-period would start after 3, or 4, or 6 months, and my doctor said I had to count it and keep using birth control. Grrr.
However, my last period was, no fooling, on April 1, 2007.
This has made it very easy to remember when my year of no periods is up and I can officially say I’m done.
Just a few more days!!!
As for the hot flashes, except for a six-week period when they would come every 15 minutes or so, I’ve been fairly lucky, they’ve been bearable. But, warning: they do come and go. I’ll go months without one, and then suddenly start getting them again.
Also, what Duck Duck Goose said. ESPECIALLY the exercise. Exercise as hard as you can, as often as you can. Not only does it help with the flashes, you just feel a lot better anyway.
ETA: I wouldn’t say the libido disappears (so far). A bit more erratic, perhaps, but still quite, er, serviceable. 'Course, I’ve always been pretty raunchy and “the change” hasn’t changed that 
My mom is against using HRT because she’s a cancer survivor, but she says that black cohosh helped a lot. (It’s supposed to help menstrual cramps, but you couldn’t prove it by me.) Oh, and soy supplements while symptoms are active, but only for a couple days a month at the most if you’re concerned about estrogen. (lots of studies link and don’t link it to breast cancer)
My mom sort of sailed through menopause with few symptoms other than the hot flashes, which really only seemed to bother her at night. She started it all fairly late, at about 57, and my 55-year-old sister hasn’t really started much in the way of symptoms, so I’m hoping that at 51 I have a bit more time before I have to deal with this. Mom never took any hormones…heck, she didn’t even go to the doctor once (“Why should I have? There wasn’t anything wrong with me”) about it, so no hormones for her…and then she developed breast cancer at age 80, so we can’t blame HRT for everything.
Friends of mine who stopped HRT a few years back, after having enjoyed years of relief from any symptoms, and thinking themselves well past everything, discovered that the hot flashes came back with a vengeance. Apparently the HRT just delays the process…puts it on hold, and it has to run its course. At least for them.
My boss is in mid-hot flash period right now, and she calls it the flappies…because she starts flapping her clothes when it hits. And in regards to a statement above about not knowing how many women around you are going through this, I think we’ve really become more open about the subject in the last decade or two. It’s less of a stigma these days…my mother would never have chatted about her symptoms with anyone other than her daughters, but us boomers just are so used to sharing everything, and so many of us are facing this now, that it’s more acceptable to announce your status than it ever was. and I hope that is a good thing…don’t know if the guys like knowing the menstrual history of every woman around them, but at least it’s not the huge secret it used to be.
I’m 51-1/2. Just in the last few days, I’m getting some horrific moods from hell. I spend a good half of the day immersed in the deepest dread and paranoia - it’s really, really bad. It’s also accompanied by a peculiar chest-burning sensation. I have an appointment to see a new gynecologist on 3/27, and I’m really wishing I could see her sooner.
This is very, very sucky.
I feel your pain ladies and I’m right there with you. I’ve been at it for about 4 yrs now. My reading convinced me (but perhaps not you) that the best way was with no intervention, let your body find it’s balance on it’s own. Any herbal or other intervention is only delaying the inevitable unless you’re prepared to take it forever. Your body still has to strike it’s own balance eventually, that was my thinking.
That said, I did try the soya products with no effect after an especially trying few months.
Here are a couple of things that I learned the hard way. Menopause is kind of like Malaria, it can come back on you. After months of it finally settled down, the insomnia diminished, the flashing slowly fading in severity and frequency, it was all becoming doable.
Then emotional turmoil reared it’s ugly head in the form of loss and upheaval at home, and, Bang! just like that I was right back at the beginning. Flashing 60+ times a day and little or no sleep. God, it seemed to take forever to wear off again.
One year later, a repeat of the same. Following a tragic death in the family, here I go again.
Even during the months when it was minimally an issue ‘the quiet times’ if something raised my emotions, upset me etc, I would immediately hot flash. GRRRR.
Also I learned that weight plays a big issue. Skinny women suffer the worst symptoms they say, as trace amounts of hormones are stored in fat cells which then help to diminish symptoms when the source dries up. Apparently we were meant to be chubby by menopause. I have been stick thin most of my adult life, so I porked up about 10 - 15lbs and really noticed a difference in the severity of symptoms. So don’t be shy about eating what you enjoy and putting on a few pounds.
Mostly though it is extremely individual. What works for your sister may not work for you. Someone else’s triggers may not be yours. It gets easier when you realize it doesn’t make sense, there is no rhyme or reason to it, let go of that and it will get easier.
Oh yeah, and if it helps, you’re not alone.
This thread has convinced me to try some black cohosh, think I’ll look into it.
Fascinating but I’m not sure I understand…if you gain the weight after menopause has started, then wouldn’t the weight gain occur when you didn’t have that many hormones left that could be stored in the new fat cells? Or do I misunderstand something?
Duck Duck Goose has it pretty much spot on.
The night sweats are tremendously horrible and the sleep deprivation is worse. I tried Black Cohash and Evening Primrose oil to no avail. I drank soy, ate soy, rubbed on soy, did everything but put it in a cache and shove it up my nether regions. Din work for me at all.
Four months with no period and just as I’m about to crack open a bottle of champagne to celebrate the end of hell, I come up a gusher with no warning. A 6 day one, that stops as abruptly as it started followed by two weeks of spotting, oh fucking yay. So for the love of God, carry the menstral equipment or you will rue the day. Seriously.
I tried very hard not to go on HRT, because I didn’t like the whole premarin thing, and still don’t. If that had been my only option, I would still be a flushing, flashing, sweaty bitch and most likely in prison. However, there are plant based estrogen patches and I am on them. Luckily after the first two months, I just stick one on every two to three months when the symptoms become unbearable.
Oh and for you very young ones out there counting your blessings…I started menopause when I was 35 and still going strong at 52 with no sign of relief in sight yet. 