# Merv Griffin announces that something "amazing" is going to happen... **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [May 18, 2004, 8:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/merv-griffin-announces-that-something-amazing-is-going-to-happen/245842 "2004-05-18T20:42:34Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![spiralscratch](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/dfb087/32.png) [@spiralscratch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/spiralscratch)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2004, 1:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/merv-griffin-announces-that-something-amazing-is-going-to-happen/245842/21 "2004-05-19T01:09:30Z")
> [@spiralscratch](#): > > I think that’s not going to happen until May 20, _2010_. > > So, we’ve got six years to prepare for that. And somehow I missed that the reference had already been spotted. _sigh_ ---
**Author:** ![jayjay](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jayjay/32/6765_2.png) [@jayjay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jayjay)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2004, 1:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/merv-griffin-announces-that-something-amazing-is-going-to-happen/245842/22 "2004-05-19T01:24:00Z")
Sean Connery’s going to appear as a contestant. “I’ll take ‘The Penis Mightier’ for $800.” ---
**Author:** ![LH75](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lh75/32/4438_2.png) [@LH75](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LH75)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2004, 1:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/merv-griffin-announces-that-something-amazing-is-going-to-happen/245842/23 "2004-05-19T01:35:30Z")
do you mean to tell me that merv griffen is still alive??? who would have thought it? ---
**Author:** ![Ms\_Boods](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/5e9695/32.png) [@Ms\_Boods](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ms_Boods)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2004, 1:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/merv-griffin-announces-that-something-amazing-is-going-to-happen/245842/24 "2004-05-19T01:35:38Z")
Just don’t get into a lift with Mr Griffith…not in Europe, anyway… ---
**Author:** ![vanilla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/f19dbf/32.png) [@vanilla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vanilla)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2004, 2:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/merv-griffin-announces-that-something-amazing-is-going-to-happen/245842/25 "2004-05-19T02:12:45Z")
explain… ---
**Author:** ![Manduck](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/manduck/32/256_2.png) [@Manduck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Manduck)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2004, 2:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/merv-griffin-announces-that-something-amazing-is-going-to-happen/245842/26 "2004-05-19T02:12:46Z")
> [@Liberal](#): > > Today, Ryan had his all-time favorite idols (in the general sense), and they included Merv Griffin and Chicago (the band). Wow - what other guests did he have - a loaf of white Wonder bread and a radio tuned to white noise? 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Mr.Blue\_Sky](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d26b3c/32.png) [@Mr.Blue\_Sky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Blue_Sky)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2004, 2:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/merv-griffin-announces-that-something-amazing-is-going-to-happen/245842/27 "2004-05-19T02:14:08Z")
> [@Manduck](#): > > Wow - what other guests did he have - a loaf of white Wonder bread and a radio tuned to white noise? > 😛 From MST3K: “We’re white. We’re white. We’re really, really white!” ---
**Author:** ![Ms\_Boods](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/5e9695/32.png) [@Ms\_Boods](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ms_Boods)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2004, 2:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/merv-griffin-announces-that-something-amazing-is-going-to-happen/245842/28 "2004-05-19T02:20:58Z")
> [@vanilla](#): > > explain… Dr. Michael Hfuhruhurr: You. You’re the elevator killer. Merv Griffin. Merv Griffin: Yeah. Dr. Michael Hfuhruhurr: Why? Merv Griffin: I don’t know. I’ve always just loved to kill. I really enjoyed it. But then I got famous, and - it’s just too hard for me. And so many witnesses. I mean, \*everybody \*recognized me. I couldn’t even work anymore. I’d hear, “Who’s that lurking over there? Isn’t that Merv Griffin?” So I came to Europe to kill. And it’s really worked out very well for me. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Jplacer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/85f322/32.png) [@Jplacer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jplacer)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2004, 2:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/merv-griffin-announces-that-something-amazing-is-going-to-happen/245842/29 "2004-05-19T02:24:20Z")
Maybe, they are going to celebrate my birthday. It is May 20. ---
**Author:** ![Zap\_Rowsdower](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/3da27b/32.png) [@Zap\_Rowsdower](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zap_Rowsdower)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2004, 2:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/merv-griffin-announces-that-something-amazing-is-going-to-happen/245842/30 "2004-05-19T02:29:17Z")
> [@Ms Boods](#): > > Jupiter is going to turn into a star? Shoot, I wanted to say that! ---
**Author:** ![Sampiro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/2acd7d/32.png) [@Sampiro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sampiro)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2004, 3:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/merv-griffin-announces-that-something-amazing-is-going-to-happen/245842/31 "2004-05-19T03:06:32Z")
Maybe it’ll be celebrity Jeopardy! and they’ll actually have Sean Connery. “I’ll take ‘Trebek’s Mother is a Whore’ for $200.” The category is ‘Famous Ships’ Mr. Connery. “Ah, so Trebeks whore of a mother couldn’t get the $200… heh heh heh…” Or even stranger: it’ll be Celebrity Week, they won’t give super-easy questions, and somebody will still finish in the positive numbers… that’d be amazing. (Did anybody see Power Brokers week, incidentally? I was amazed to find that the people behind some of our most powerful politicians are as stupid as most of the soap opera actors who’ve been on the show.) ---
**Author:** ![Manduck](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/manduck/32/256_2.png) [@Manduck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Manduck)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2004, 4:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/merv-griffin-announces-that-something-amazing-is-going-to-happen/245842/32 "2004-05-19T04:29:20Z")
> [@Mr. Blue Sky](#): > > From MST3K: > > “We’re white. We’re white. We’re really, really white!” I meant to emphasize blandness, rather than whiteness, but I guess it works either way 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Gunslinger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/4491bb/32.png) [@Gunslinger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gunslinger)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2004, 5:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/merv-griffin-announces-that-something-amazing-is-going-to-happen/245842/33 "2004-05-19T05:01:12Z")
> [@Mr. Blue Sky](#): > > The last time someone made an announcement like this, all we got was the Segway. Trebek’s going to do the show while standing on a Segway! ---
**Author:** ![Odinoneeye](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/97f17d/32.png) [@Odinoneeye](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Odinoneeye)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2004, 5:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/merv-griffin-announces-that-something-amazing-is-going-to-happen/245842/34 "2004-05-19T05:14:36Z")
No one’s suggested the obvious. Merv Griffin is senile. ---
**Author:** ![Sam\_Stone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Sam\_Stone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sam_Stone)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2004, 5:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/merv-griffin-announces-that-something-amazing-is-going-to-happen/245842/35 "2004-05-19T05:24:13Z")
Hey, [Andy Kaufman is back!](http://andykaufmanreturns.blogspot.com/) ---
**Author:** ![Survivor](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/51bf81/32.png) [@Survivor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Survivor)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2004, 6:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/merv-griffin-announces-that-something-amazing-is-going-to-happen/245842/36 "2004-05-19T06:27:19Z")
He’s going to come out? :dubious: ---
**Author:** ![Airman\_Doors\_USAF](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e36b37/32.png) [@Airman\_Doors\_USAF](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Airman_Doors_USAF)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2004, 6:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/merv-griffin-announces-that-something-amazing-is-going-to-happen/245842/37 "2004-05-19T06:58:08Z")
One of the contestants will be Terd Ferguson? ---
**Author:** ![dantheman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dantheman/32/9421_2.png) [@dantheman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dantheman)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2004, 10:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/merv-griffin-announces-that-something-amazing-is-going-to-happen/245842/38 "2004-05-19T10:24:53Z")
> [@Ms Boods](#): > > Dr. Michael Hfuhruhurr: You. You’re the elevator killer. Merv Griffin. > Merv Griffin: Yeah. > Dr. Michael Hfuhruhurr: Why? > Merv Griffin: I don’t know. I’ve always just loved to kill. I really enjoyed it. But then I got famous, and - it’s just too hard for me. And so many witnesses. I mean, \*everybody \*recognized me. I couldn’t even work anymore. I’d hear, “Who’s that lurking over there? Isn’t that Merv Griffin?” So I came to Europe to kill. And it’s really worked out very well for me. > **[The Man with Two Brains (1983) - IMDb](https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0085894/)** > > The Man with Two Brains: Directed by Carl Reiner. With Steve Martin, Kathleen Turner, David Warner, Paul Benedict. A brain surgeon marries a femme fatale, causing his life to turn upside down. Things go more awry when he falls in love with a talking... ---
**Author:** ![Ms\_Boods](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/5e9695/32.png) [@Ms\_Boods](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ms_Boods)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2004, 4:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/merv-griffin-announces-that-something-amazing-is-going-to-happen/245842/39 "2004-05-19T16:07:17Z")
> [@dantheman](#): > > [http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0085894/](http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0085894/) 🙂 Although, I always heard that line ‘I couldn’t even _lurk_ anymore’, not ‘I couldn’t even _work_ anymore’… Oh, and get that cat outta here… ---
**Author:** ![BobLibDem](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/boblibdem/32/3149_2.png) [@BobLibDem](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BobLibDem)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2004, 6:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/merv-griffin-announces-that-something-amazing-is-going-to-happen/245842/40 "2004-05-19T18:38:04Z")
Maybe someone wins \> $1,000,000. Or gets the highest possible Jeopardy total. Actually, I was sort of hoping Wheel of Fortune would be the show and that the amazing thing would be a prize on the wheel marked “Vanna”. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/merv-griffin-announces-that-something-amazing-is-going-to-happen/245842.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/merv-griffin-announces-that-something-amazing-is-going-to-happen/245842.md?page=3)