# Messages from God, brought to you by Mnementh **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [December 10, 2002, 3:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/messages-from-god-brought-to-you-by-mnementh/141701 "2002-12-10T03:57:18Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![Smashed\_Ice\_Cream](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ed8c4c/32.png) [@Smashed\_Ice\_Cream](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Smashed_Ice_Cream)\ **Post date:** [December 10, 2002, 9:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/messages-from-god-brought-to-you-by-mnementh/141701/61 "2002-12-10T21:40:01Z")
Ooh - do me. ---
**Author:** ![Blackeyes](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/f6c823/32.png) [@Blackeyes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Blackeyes)\ **Post date:** [December 10, 2002, 9:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/messages-from-god-brought-to-you-by-mnementh/141701/62 "2002-12-10T21:56:18Z")
Who is this Viz, and how shall I worship Thee? ---
**Author:** ![Magickly\_Delicious](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/4491bb/32.png) [@Magickly\_Delicious](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Magickly_Delicious)\ **Post date:** [December 10, 2002, 10:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/messages-from-god-brought-to-you-by-mnementh/141701/63 "2002-12-10T22:14:53Z")
Ooh, a prophet! Is there a message around for me? ---
**Author:** ![mnemosyne](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c4cdca/32.png) [@mnemosyne](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mnemosyne)\ **Post date:** [December 10, 2002, 10:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/messages-from-god-brought-to-you-by-mnementh/141701/64 "2002-12-10T22:18:35Z")
**Mnem** , **mnem** would like to know if there is a message for her, too! ---
**Author:** ![AncientHumanoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ancienthumanoid/32/278_2.png) [@AncientHumanoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AncientHumanoid)\ **Post date:** [December 10, 2002, 10:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/messages-from-god-brought-to-you-by-mnementh/141701/65 "2002-12-10T22:44:48Z")
Hey \*\* Mnementh\*\*, thanks for the RCF. Came in real handy today. First at Home Depot. Imagine the mayhem when the paint can lids became loose whenever the paint can shaker was used. WhooHoo! Then, off to the mall. Had to restrain myself from using the RCF to change the traffic lights for me. Figgered that would be mundane. So, at the mall. Spent a little bit of time causing spurious wind patterns to lift cute chicks skirts as they entered Foley’s. Pretty fun. Turned the escalators transparent. Lots of fun. Went to Hallmark. Set scanner of cash register so that every Christmas card rung up becomes tasteless, sometimes illegal, porn. Most fun of all. Oh yeah, made all the bears in a Florida forrest bald. They look funny. Right now, I’m trying to figure out how to operate RCF with one hand. My other hand is stuck in my cousin Cindy’s mouth. And, we’re both very slightly drunk. Give the Perverse One my regards, oh esteemed prophet **Mnementh**. I’ve never seen an amateur phet. Hmmm… ---
**Author:** ![Mnementh](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/898d66/32.png) [@Mnementh](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mnementh)\ **Post date:** [December 10, 2002, 11:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/messages-from-god-brought-to-you-by-mnementh/141701/66 "2002-12-10T23:09:47Z")
**SIC** , the Viz says to be careful what you wish for. **Blackeyes** , The VIZ is all things naked and drunk. Appropriate worship can be made at your local HEDAS, or, thanks to the internet, right in the comfort of your own home! **Magickly Delicious** , you will be required to prove your claim of deliciousness before a Grand Council of Minions before you may recieve your message. This is a matter of precedent, and is, unfortunatly, necessary. We apologise for any inconvenience. **mnemosyne** , there was a message for you, but when the Viz kept telling me to ‘Tell Mnem that…’, I kept getting confused and screaming at him. It ended up in a Brawl To End It All, which I, of course, lost humiliatingly. The Viz, drunk on victory and some whiskey, passed out kneeling in front of the One True Procelain Throne, and thus was your message lost to the annals of time. Er, yeah. Sorry 'bout that. **NoClueBoy** , good work. When come back bring pie! ---
**Author:** ![hardygrrl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/a3d4f5/32.png) [@hardygrrl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hardygrrl)\ **Post date:** [December 11, 2002, 1:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/messages-from-god-brought-to-you-by-mnementh/141701/67 "2002-12-11T01:28:06Z")
**Mnementh** …what is my message? :: leaves an offering (a cleavage picture) :: ---
**Author:** ![Tir\_Tinuviel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/bc79bd/32.png) [@Tir\_Tinuviel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tir_Tinuviel)\ **Post date:** [December 11, 2002, 1:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/messages-from-god-brought-to-you-by-mnementh/141701/68 "2002-12-11T01:39:39Z")
_steals the cleavage picture and runs off_ ---
**Author:** ![Kat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/b19c9b/32.png) [@Kat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kat)\ **Post date:** [December 11, 2002, 2:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/messages-from-god-brought-to-you-by-mnementh/141701/69 "2002-12-11T02:12:12Z")
Yo, **Mnemmy** , tell His Vizzness that I want a message. [sub]I want a pizza and a hot fudge sundae, too, but I’ll settle for a Divine Message.[/sub] ---
**Author:** ![hardygrrl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/a3d4f5/32.png) [@hardygrrl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hardygrrl)\ **Post date:** [December 11, 2002, 3:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/messages-from-god-brought-to-you-by-mnementh/141701/70 "2002-12-11T03:52:50Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Tir Tinuviel \* > \*\*_steals the cleavage picture and runs off_ \*\* Naughty **Tir**. Spanking time 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Magickly\_Delicious](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/4491bb/32.png) [@Magickly\_Delicious](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Magickly_Delicious)\ **Post date:** [December 11, 2002, 4:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/messages-from-god-brought-to-you-by-mnementh/141701/71 "2002-12-11T04:32:42Z")
> [@](#): > > you will be required to prove your claim of deliciousness before a Grand Council of Minions before you may recieve your message. Got it! When do I start? ---
**Author:** ![Flowerchild](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/858c86/32.png) [@Flowerchild](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Flowerchild)\ **Post date:** [December 11, 2002, 5:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/messages-from-god-brought-to-you-by-mnementh/141701/72 "2002-12-11T05:13:45Z")
What about me ,What about me? i offer the prophet a six pack and the viz himself something extra…use your imagination… :eek: ---
**Author:** ![Flutterby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/6f9a4e/32.png) [@Flutterby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Flutterby)\ **Post date:** [December 11, 2002, 5:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/messages-from-god-brought-to-you-by-mnementh/141701/73 "2002-12-11T05:54:02Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Mnementh \* > **Obsidian Butterfly** : The Viz thinks that your constant double posting is a result of a need for attention. Then he kinda fell asleep and began mumbling incoherently, before starting up in the Gilded Lay-Z-Boy, screaming about THE RODENTS! OH, GOD, THE RODENTS! It’s _Flutterby_ btw. And it’s not a need for attention! I’m the Saint of Multiple Posts[sup]TM[/sup] So I’m reminding him of rodents? How’s that work? Maybe this will get some interest from him. [Me in a kilt (on the left)](http://flutterby.teemingmillions.com/Images/Zil2.jpg) and just for good measure _flashes boobies at Viz_ ---
**Author:** ![Mnementh](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/898d66/32.png) [@Mnementh](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mnementh)\ **Post date:** [December 11, 2002, 6:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/messages-from-god-brought-to-you-by-mnementh/141701/74 "2002-12-11T06:39:17Z")
**Hardy** , the Viz is pleased with your offering (And further excited by the promise of watching you spank **Tir** ). He would like to offer you a chance to settle these differences in the Great Wrestling Ring of Ages. It’ll be a bra and panties match between **hardygrrl** and **Tir**! Hooray! **Kat** , your message is that there’s a lot more to life than pizza and hot fudge sundaes. The Viz counsels that one needs to look into one’s self to find the proper answers, and learn to trust one’s instincts and one’s ability to make the correct choices. Trust your heart. It will not lead you wrong. …What the… Man, Viz, what have you been smoking? Ambrosia. Rrrrrright. Moving along, then… **Magickly Delicious** , the licking minions will be at your place first thing in the morning. You should perhaps prepare yourself, as it can be a… traumatic experience. They’re lusty little things, those minions. **Flowerchild** , the Viz will graciously accept your offer, and counsels you that yay, He shall still respect thee in the morning, and verily shall he call to see how thou art doing! ---
**Author:** ![BraheSilver](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ecccb3/32.png) [@BraheSilver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BraheSilver)\ **Post date:** [December 11, 2002, 6:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/messages-from-god-brought-to-you-by-mnementh/141701/75 "2002-12-11T06:56:53Z")
I haven’t checked my soul-mail in… well, a long time, so I’m sure there’s a Holy Message gathering ethereal dust somewhere in the astral plane with my name on it. Spell it out to me, **Mnementh** , what’s the Big Guy got for me? I’ve got, lessee… twenty… three cents and a piece of lint as big as a thumbnail; I’m sure that can buy a lot of real estate up there. _Bribery for entertainment puposes only. No actual attempt to bribe any deity with pocket lint is implied. Unless, y’know, He/She/It/They can hook me up with something, 'cuz then I’d be ready to deal. But I wouldn’t be, because I’m not bribing. Right._ ---
**Author:** ![Tir\_Tinuviel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/bc79bd/32.png) [@Tir\_Tinuviel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tir_Tinuviel)\ **Post date:** [December 11, 2002, 9:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/messages-from-god-brought-to-you-by-mnementh/141701/76 "2002-12-11T09:28:01Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Mnementh \* > **Hardy, the Viz is pleased with your offering (And further excited by the promise of watching you spank Tir). He would like to offer you a chance to settle these differences in the Great Wrestling Ring of Ages. It’ll be a bra and panties match between hardygrrl and Tir! Hooray!** Being spectator to that, of course, would require further messages for the both of us… **REALLY good ones** (if you know what I’m saying…;)) 😃 ---
**Author:** ![hardygrrl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/a3d4f5/32.png) [@hardygrrl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hardygrrl)\ **Post date:** [December 11, 2002, 12:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/messages-from-god-brought-to-you-by-mnementh/141701/77 "2002-12-11T12:51:28Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Mnementh \* > \*\ ***Hardy** , the Viz is pleased with your offering (And further excited by the promise of watching you spank **Tir** ). He would like to offer you a chance to settle these differences in the Great Wrestling Ring of Ages. It’ll be a bra and panties match between **hardygrrl** and **Tir**! Hooray! > \*\* And the Viz sayeth “Let there be BroncoBusters?” ---
**Author:** ![Mnementh](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/898d66/32.png) [@Mnementh](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mnementh)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2002, 3:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/messages-from-god-brought-to-you-by-mnementh/141701/78 "2002-12-12T03:17:43Z")
**Obsidian Flutterby** , the rodents were not your fault. That was the result of a totally unrelated drinking problem. The mispelling of your name was my fault; I have been locked in a 2"x3"x2’ hole for the past 24 hours with fire ants for my jackassery. And the Viz does like the boobies! Oh yes he does! Interest gotten! **BraheSilver** , twenty-three cents is halfway to another beer, so you shall be answered. And lo, did the Great Viz say from on high: “Dude. That’s some big lint. You want some real estate for that? Good trade, man! I’m so wasted.” …Words to live by. **Tir** , you got the cleavage picture. More than worth the price of admission. And **Hardy** , he said something more like “Let there be Nudity”, but broncobusters works too. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Flamsterette\_X](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/41988e/32.png) [@Flamsterette\_X](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Flamsterette_X)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2002, 3:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/messages-from-god-brought-to-you-by-mnementh/141701/79 "2002-12-12T03:45:18Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Mnementh \* > \*\ ***Flamsterette** , the Viz says unto you the following: > “Your little F\_X looks like a little face to me, and verily, it is amusing. Oh, and also, Genesis is the censored version. If you think that’s bad, wait until I re-release the story of exactly how the world became so populated by only two people. In explicit detail!” > It’s really a very interesting read, if you’re into that kind of thing. > \*\* Looks like a little face, eh? Hmm… > [@](#): > > F\_X F\_X F\_X F\_X F\_X F\_X F\_X F\_X F\_X F\_X Well… I suppose if you took the “F” to be really long bangs or something. Also, about Genesis being the cednsored version, I’m quite sure that whatever the Viz re-releases will be utterly explicit, and a no-holds-barred type of deal. F\_X ---
**Author:** ![AncientHumanoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ancienthumanoid/32/278_2.png) [@AncientHumanoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AncientHumanoid)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2002, 3:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/messages-from-god-brought-to-you-by-mnementh/141701/80 "2002-12-12T03:59:27Z")
Genesis? Genesis?!? Genesis is planet forbidden! I go not! (_STIII:TSFS_) * * * **Mnementh** , I gots myself a little prob… Seems I was using the RCF thingy you guys gave me, and well… I’m currently stuck to a naked Elle MacPhereson. That’s not the problem. How do I get, er, um, …ahem… stains… out of the Shroud of Turin? Seems Elle and I needed something 'cause the Vatican floor is just so damn cold at night, you know? So, We’ll just sit here doing tequila shots til you answer. Found a couple of blankets, btw. Thanks for sending them. Did the video turn out all right? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/messages-from-god-brought-to-you-by-mnementh/141701.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/messages-from-god-brought-to-you-by-mnementh/141701.md?page=5)