# Michael Douglas Makes Powerful Statement About the Dangers of Pleasuring Catherine Zeta Jones **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [June 4, 2013, 1:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/michael-douglas-makes-powerful-statement-about-the-dangers-of-pleasuring-catherine-zeta-jones/660110 "2013-06-04T13:13:52Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![corkboard](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e9bcb4/32.png) [@corkboard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/corkboard)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2013, 6:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/michael-douglas-makes-powerful-statement-about-the-dangers-of-pleasuring-catherine-zeta-jones/660110/42 "2013-06-04T18:01:32Z")
Is there anyone who heard this story that didn’t picture CZJ getting eaten out? I thought not. ---
**Author:** ![billfish678](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7bcc69/32.png) [@billfish678](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/billfish678)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2013, 6:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/michael-douglas-makes-powerful-statement-about-the-dangers-of-pleasuring-catherine-zeta-jones/660110/43 "2013-06-04T18:09:33Z")
I hate to think what the heck you get if you UNpleasure her. Apparently she’s like a disease spreading praying mantis or something. ---
**Author:** ![Irishman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/b487fb/32.png) [@Irishman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Irishman)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2013, 6:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/michael-douglas-makes-powerful-statement-about-the-dangers-of-pleasuring-catherine-zeta-jones/660110/44 "2013-06-04T18:11:24Z")
> [@Procrustus](#): > > I’m speechless. Shouldn’t that be “tongue tied”? ---
**Author:** ![eschereal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eschereal/32/18939_2.png) [@eschereal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eschereal)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2013, 6:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/michael-douglas-makes-powerful-statement-about-the-dangers-of-pleasuring-catherine-zeta-jones/660110/45 "2013-06-04T18:43:31Z")
> [@Irishman](#): > > Shouldn’t that be “tongue tied”? Thanks for that, now will be hearing [the Cat](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JiozAc26heI) in my head the rest of the day. ---
**Author:** ![gaffa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/e68b1a/32.png) [@gaffa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gaffa)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2013, 7:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/michael-douglas-makes-powerful-statement-about-the-dangers-of-pleasuring-catherine-zeta-jones/660110/46 "2013-06-04T19:16:13Z")
_The Last Word with Lawrence O’Donnell_ [featured this story last night with guest Dr. Hilda Hutcherson](http://www.nbcnews.com/id/45755883/ns/msnbc-the_last_word/vp/52090282#52090282) who called Douglas a “hero” for letting people know about this. They discussed dental dams, and the much more sensible alternative of using Saran Wrap. ---
**Author:** ![DiosaBellissima](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a8b319/32.png) [@DiosaBellissima](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DiosaBellissima)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2013, 9:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/michael-douglas-makes-powerful-statement-about-the-dangers-of-pleasuring-catherine-zeta-jones/660110/47 "2013-06-04T21:29:50Z")
Considering virtually the entire sexually active adult population will have HPV at some point in their lives, it’s entirely possible he didn’t catch anything from his wife. And, frankly, given those numbers, I’m not getting why it’s such a horrifying big deal that he’s talking about it-- lots of people have HPV. And no, I’m not being defensive because I’ve got a bad case of the HPV. I’ve never had a positive test, but realistically, I’m sure I will someday in my life, despite being as safe as I reasonably can. ---
**Author:** ![Marley23](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Marley23](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marley23)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2013, 9:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/michael-douglas-makes-powerful-statement-about-the-dangers-of-pleasuring-catherine-zeta-jones/660110/48 "2013-06-04T21:43:21Z")
> [@DiosaBellissima](#): > > And, frankly, given those numbers, I’m not getting why it’s such a horrifying big deal that he’s talking about it-- lots of people have HPV. The most obvious reason is that it’s a senior citizen talking about sex. On top of that there’s the fact that nobody is sure why he started talking about this at this point (except maybe to brag), and the fact that his statement - at least to the extent he was talking about himself - is pretty shaky even though it is possible to get HPV and oral cancer that way. ---
**Author:** ![terentii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/terentii/32/212_2.png) [@terentii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/terentii)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2013, 10:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/michael-douglas-makes-powerful-statement-about-the-dangers-of-pleasuring-catherine-zeta-jones/660110/49 "2013-06-04T22:09:48Z")
> [@Marley23](#): > > The most obvious reason is that it’s a senior citizen talking about sex. Oooooh, like Sean Connery in _ **Entrapment** _. :rolleyes: 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Sampiro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/2acd7d/32.png) [@Sampiro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sampiro)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2013, 10:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/michael-douglas-makes-powerful-statement-about-the-dangers-of-pleasuring-catherine-zeta-jones/660110/50 "2013-06-04T22:17:06Z")
> [@Marley23](#): > > The most obvious reason is that it’s a senior citizen talking about sex. On top of that there’s the fact that nobody is sure why he started talking about this at this point (except maybe to brag), and the fact that his statement - at least to the extent he was talking about himself - is pretty shaky even though it is possible to get HPV and oral cancer that way. And the fact it’s a senior citizen whose much younger wife- and presumably primary sex partner- is as well known as he is, bringing to mind an instant image and association when he mentions oral sex (“and all that jazz…”). They also have a son who turns 13 this summer; it would be much worse if he were a couple of years older, but even as it is he’s probably getting an earful at school. Their daughter is young enough that it’s probably not really an issue yet with her friends. (Michael’s 35 year old son who’s been beaten up in prison a few times is probably hearing about his dad’s statements from his “roommates”.) ---
**Author:** ![Rysto](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/ecccb3/32.png) [@Rysto](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rysto)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2013, 10:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/michael-douglas-makes-powerful-statement-about-the-dangers-of-pleasuring-catherine-zeta-jones/660110/51 "2013-06-04T22:30:18Z")
> [@corkboard](#): > > Is there anyone who heard this story that didn’t picture CZJ getting eaten out? > > I thought not. _raises hand_ My _father_ survived the exact same type of cancer. Thanks for the mental image, Michaeal Douglas. :eek: ---
**Author:** ![handsomeharry](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/e9c0ed/32.png) [@handsomeharry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/handsomeharry)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2013, 11:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/michael-douglas-makes-powerful-statement-about-the-dangers-of-pleasuring-catherine-zeta-jones/660110/52 "2013-06-04T23:33:42Z")
> [@billfish678](#): > > Guys, you only get the hoo hah cancer if you do a counter clockwise twist at end. Clockwise and its totally safe. That’s what my friend little Billy told me in the 7th grade. No! No, you fool! \*\*\*Counter \*\*\*clockwise is totally safe! Counter! Regards, Little Billy ---
**Author:** ![Ethilrist](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ethilrist/32/4604_2.png) [@Ethilrist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ethilrist)\ **Post date:** [June 5, 2013, 12:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/michael-douglas-makes-powerful-statement-about-the-dangers-of-pleasuring-catherine-zeta-jones/660110/53 "2013-06-05T00:01:41Z")
Ms. Jones is most emphatically not available for comment. ---
**Author:** ![gaffa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/e68b1a/32.png) [@gaffa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gaffa)\ **Post date:** [June 5, 2013, 12:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/michael-douglas-makes-powerful-statement-about-the-dangers-of-pleasuring-catherine-zeta-jones/660110/54 "2013-06-05T00:19:42Z")
Dr. Hilda Hutcherson advised that everyone, male and female, between the ages of 13 and 25 should get the HPV vaccine. ---
**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\ **Post date:** [June 5, 2013, 12:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/michael-douglas-makes-powerful-statement-about-the-dangers-of-pleasuring-catherine-zeta-jones/660110/55 "2013-06-05T00:23:05Z")
As well as investing in Dow Chimical (makers of Saran Wrap.) ---
**Author:** ![Seanette](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/seanette/32/9139_2.png) [@Seanette](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Seanette)\ **Post date:** [June 5, 2013, 1:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/michael-douglas-makes-powerful-statement-about-the-dangers-of-pleasuring-catherine-zeta-jones/660110/56 "2013-06-05T01:11:44Z")
> [@Ethilrist](#): > > Ms. Jones is most emphatically not available for comment. And her husband may be lucky to get within 10 feet of her any time soon. Seems to me very disrespectful of his wife for him to make such intimate remarks about her in a public setting, knowing those remarks will be passed around. ---
**Author:** ![dropzone](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dropzone/32/7515_2.png) [@dropzone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dropzone)\ **Post date:** [June 5, 2013, 1:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/michael-douglas-makes-powerful-statement-about-the-dangers-of-pleasuring-catherine-zeta-jones/660110/57 "2013-06-05T01:23:31Z")
> [@silenus](#): > > Since we don’t have a sequential threads thread going right now, I’ll point it out here. When I opened this forum just now, I saw > > **Michael Douglas Makes Powerful Statement About the Dangers of Pleasuring Catherine Zeta Jones** > > **How do you get the smell of onions off your fingers?** She’s Welsh. Not onions. Leeks. ---
**Author:** ![lieu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c2a13f/32.png) [@lieu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lieu)\ **Post date:** [June 5, 2013, 1:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/michael-douglas-makes-powerful-statement-about-the-dangers-of-pleasuring-catherine-zeta-jones/660110/58 "2013-06-05T01:47:45Z")
**Michael Douglas Makes Powerful Statement About the Dangers of Pleasuring Catherine Zeta Jones** _I am Partapuss._ ---
**Author:** ![Machine\_Elf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/82dd89/32.png) [@Machine\_Elf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Machine_Elf)\ **Post date:** [June 5, 2013, 12:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/michael-douglas-makes-powerful-statement-about-the-dangers-of-pleasuring-catherine-zeta-jones/660110/59 "2013-06-05T12:22:33Z")
> [@Seanette](#): > > And her husband may be lucky to get within 10 feet of her any time soon. Seems to me very disrespectful of his wife for him to make such intimate remarks about her in a public setting, knowing those remarks will be passed around. Maybe those remarks aren’t about her - and now she’s wondering why he went down on everyone _except_ her. ---
**Author:** ![Sampiro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/2acd7d/32.png) [@Sampiro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sampiro)\ **Post date:** [June 5, 2013, 1:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/michael-douglas-makes-powerful-statement-about-the-dangers-of-pleasuring-catherine-zeta-jones/660110/60 "2013-06-05T13:22:01Z")
I hope he didn’t pass on HPV during his makeout scenes with Matt Damon. Poor Kirk is 96 and in the same week gets to see his son anally penetrated on TV and discussing cunnilingus in the news, and that’s from one of the _good_ sons. ---
**Author:** ![Count\_Blucher](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/c5a1d2/32.png) [@Count\_Blucher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Count_Blucher)\ **Post date:** [June 5, 2013, 2:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/michael-douglas-makes-powerful-statement-about-the-dangers-of-pleasuring-catherine-zeta-jones/660110/61 "2013-06-05T14:09:00Z")
> [@Rysto](#): > > _raises hand_ > > My _father_ survived the exact same type of cancer. Thanks for the mental image, Michaeal Douglas. :eek: Am I the only one who read this & pictured a woman watching this interview and then turning to smack a cancer survivor across the back of his head while yelling, “\* I could have had my P-8…!\*” :eek: 😉 [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/michael-douglas-makes-powerful-statement-about-the-dangers-of-pleasuring-catherine-zeta-jones/660110.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/michael-douglas-makes-powerful-statement-about-the-dangers-of-pleasuring-catherine-zeta-jones/660110.md?page=4)