# Michael Jackson is having quadruplets - og help us all! **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [July 20, 2004, 6:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/michael-jackson-is-having-quadruplets-og-help-us-all/256046 "2004-07-20T18:50:07Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![World\_Eater](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/f04885/32.png) [@World\_Eater](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/World_Eater)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2004, 6:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/michael-jackson-is-having-quadruplets-og-help-us-all/256046/1 "2004-07-20T18:50:07Z")
[http://www.cnn.com/2004/SHOWBIZ/Music/07/20/people.jackson.reut/index.html](http://www.cnn.com/2004/SHOWBIZ/Music/07/20/people.jackson.reut/index.html) Just when you think things can’t get any stranger. ---
**Author:** ![Sunspace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sunspace/32/1250_2.png) [@Sunspace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunspace)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2004, 6:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/michael-jackson-is-having-quadruplets-og-help-us-all/256046/2 "2004-07-20T18:53:58Z")
Heinlein was right. These _are_ the Crazy Years. :eek: ---
**Author:** ![Ethilrist](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ethilrist/32/4604_2.png) [@Ethilrist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ethilrist)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2004, 6:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/michael-jackson-is-having-quadruplets-og-help-us-all/256046/3 "2004-07-20T18:59:49Z")
> [@](#): > > Jackson, 45, already has three children – **Prince Michael I** and daughter **Paris Michael** by his former wife, Debbie Rowe, and **Prince Michael II** , the child he notoriously dangled from the balcony of a Berlin hotel in November 2002. I… wow. ---
**Author:** ![Hal\_Briston](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/a9a28c/32.png) [@Hal\_Briston](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hal_Briston)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2004, 7:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/michael-jackson-is-having-quadruplets-og-help-us-all/256046/4 "2004-07-20T19:00:35Z")
“This is _not_ what I meant when I said I wanted to have four kids at once, damnit!” Ok, that was just uncalled for. I apologize. _snicker_ ---
**Author:** ![Ponder\_Stibbons](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ponder_stibbons/32/343_2.png) [@Ponder\_Stibbons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ponder_Stibbons)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2004, 7:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/michael-jackson-is-having-quadruplets-og-help-us-all/256046/5 "2004-07-20T19:10:25Z")
In all fairness to Michael, it’s the _surrogate mother_ who is having quadruplets, not him. 😛 I guess when it comes to Michael, I’d paraphrase some old sayings … “Things are never so strange that they can’t get stranger.” “Things are always strangest just before they go completely wierd.” ---
**Author:** ![Eats\_Crayons](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/278dde/32.png) [@Eats\_Crayons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eats_Crayons)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2004, 8:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/michael-jackson-is-having-quadruplets-og-help-us-all/256046/6 "2004-07-20T20:13:57Z")
I just got a nervous tick in my eye from reading the thread title. ---
**Author:** ![Agrippina](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/8797f3/32.png) [@Agrippina](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Agrippina)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2004, 8:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/michael-jackson-is-having-quadruplets-og-help-us-all/256046/7 "2004-07-20T20:19:11Z")
“Blanket come back! Don’t run! You’re being ignorant. That’s ignorance!” [sub]South Park reference[/sub] ---
**Author:** ![ioioio](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ioioio/32/316_2.png) [@ioioio](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ioioio)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2004, 8:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/michael-jackson-is-having-quadruplets-og-help-us-all/256046/8 "2004-07-20T20:53:48Z")
Prince Michael the Third, Prince Michael the Fourth, Prince Michael the Fifth, and Prince Michael the Sixth. ---
**Author:** ![elfkin477](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/a9a28c/32.png) [@elfkin477](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elfkin477)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2004, 8:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/michael-jackson-is-having-quadruplets-og-help-us-all/256046/9 "2004-07-20T20:57:53Z")
Awww, Prince Michael III, IV and V and Paris II, how sweet. :rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![Ethilrist](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ethilrist/32/4604_2.png) [@Ethilrist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ethilrist)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2004, 9:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/michael-jackson-is-having-quadruplets-og-help-us-all/256046/10 "2004-07-20T21:21:02Z")
> [@Ponder Stibbons](#): > > In all fairness to Michael, it’s the _surrogate mother_ who is having quadruplets, not him. 😛 I wouldn’t put it past him to find a way… ---
**Author:** ![saramamalana](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/74df32/32.png) [@saramamalana](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/saramamalana)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2004, 11:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/michael-jackson-is-having-quadruplets-og-help-us-all/256046/11 "2004-07-20T23:30:11Z")
Is it wrong that what I’m reacting to is the fact the hotel was $4000/night? What the hell can a hotel do that would make it cost so much? A happy ending massage every hour on the hour? Solid gold toilet paper? Sheesh. Back on topic…is **Prince** the first name of these children and **Michael** the middle name? I think I misunderstand. ---
**Author:** ![Wile\_E](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c37758/32.png) [@Wile\_E](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wile_E)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2004, 11:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/michael-jackson-is-having-quadruplets-og-help-us-all/256046/12 "2004-07-20T23:31:52Z")
> [@Hal Briston](#): > > “This is _not_ what I meant when I said I wanted to have four kids at once, damnit!” > > Ok, that was just uncalled for. I apologize. > > _snicker_ That was just awful! :eek: _snicker_ I heard about this story this morning and my thought was won’t someone please think of the children?! … besides Michael, that is. ---
**Author:** ![flamingbananas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/f4b2a3/32.png) [@flamingbananas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/flamingbananas)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2004, 11:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/michael-jackson-is-having-quadruplets-og-help-us-all/256046/13 "2004-07-20T23:44:01Z")
First thought that comes to mind is: Who would want to have sex with Michael Jackson? :eek: ---
**Author:** ![Tuckerfan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/eada6e/32.png) [@Tuckerfan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tuckerfan)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2004, 12:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/michael-jackson-is-having-quadruplets-og-help-us-all/256046/14 "2004-07-21T00:07:05Z")
[There’s a thread on this in the Pit.](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=267424) ---
**Author:** ![Governor\_Quinn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/d26b3c/32.png) [@Governor\_Quinn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Governor_Quinn)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2004, 12:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/michael-jackson-is-having-quadruplets-og-help-us-all/256046/15 "2004-07-21T00:13:06Z")
The less I think about this, the better I’ll be. ---
**Author:** ![Cervaise](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cervaise/32/16693_2.png) [@Cervaise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cervaise)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2004, 1:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/michael-jackson-is-having-quadruplets-og-help-us-all/256046/16 "2004-07-21T01:38:42Z")
I think the journalist misunderstood what’s going on and is misrepresenting the nature of MJ’s reproductive strategy. He’s not having quadruplets. He is dividing twice. ---
**Author:** ![Nutty\_Bunny](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/d07c76/32.png) [@Nutty\_Bunny](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nutty_Bunny)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2004, 2:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/michael-jackson-is-having-quadruplets-og-help-us-all/256046/17 "2004-07-21T14:26:41Z")
Well, folks. I have now officially heard it all. That’s it. I’m done. I’m checking out now. Buh-bye. [sub]I’m kidding, of course. No need to send out the suicide police.[/sub] ---
**Author:** ![AngelicGemma](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/439d5e/32.png) [@AngelicGemma](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AngelicGemma)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2004, 2:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/michael-jackson-is-having-quadruplets-og-help-us-all/256046/18 "2004-07-21T14:53:40Z")
> [@Rabid Child](#): > > “Blanket come back! Don’t run! You’re being ignorant. That’s ignorance!” > > [sub]South Park reference[/sub] At work. Must…not…start… laughing. I’m going to have to watch that episode of South Park as soon as I get home. It was hilarious! ---
**Author:** ![Cazzle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cazzle/32/75_2.png) [@Cazzle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cazzle)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2004, 2:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/michael-jackson-is-having-quadruplets-og-help-us-all/256046/19 "2004-07-21T14:54:43Z")
Yes, Michael Jackson’s sons are named Prince Michael and Prince Michael II (aka Blanket). His daughter is Paris Michael Katherine, and is allegedly named after the city she was conceived in (good thing Jacko was in France and not visiting his hometown at that time, eh?). Based on those trends, I predict the following names for the quads: boys will be Prince Michael _number_, girls will be Petridish Michael _number_. ---
**Author:** ![ioioio](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ioioio/32/316_2.png) [@ioioio](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ioioio)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2004, 3:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/michael-jackson-is-having-quadruplets-og-help-us-all/256046/20 "2004-07-21T15:49:36Z")
> [@flamingbananas](#): > > First thought that comes to mind is: Who would want to have sex with Michael Jackson? :eek: I don’t think Michael even wants to have sex with himself. None of the children he’s allegedly fathered so far appear to have any of his genetic material whatsoever.