# Micro-rant: I hate thin chocolate **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [December 23, 2013, 1:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/micro-rant-i-hate-thin-chocolate/676987 "2013-12-23T01:26:36Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Lumpy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lumpy/32/446_2.png) [@Lumpy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lumpy)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2013, 1:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/micro-rant-i-hate-thin-chocolate/676987/1 "2013-12-23T01:26:36Z")
Given the high price of chocolate lately, the major manufacturers are pulling the shrinkage game by making their bars thinner and thinner. Maybe it’s because they have a higher ratio of surface to interior and so suffer more from oxidation and drying out; or maybe when they’re thinner they have to formulated to be more resistant to breaking and melting… But IMHO, for some reason the thinner chocolate bars are, the more they taste like cocoa-flavored wax. I used to buy the giant-sized (6-8 oz) bars not because I necessarily wanted that much chocolate but because they were thicker; but now they’re more like 4-5 oz and getting paper thin. ---
**Author:** ![SerafinaPekala](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecae2f/32.png) [@SerafinaPekala](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SerafinaPekala)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2013, 1:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/micro-rant-i-hate-thin-chocolate/676987/2 "2013-12-23T01:33:06Z")
U no likey Ghirardelli? 😕 Their Intense Dark Choccy ones are an OralGasm! My eye Dr has big bowls of them in his waiting rooms and I stuff my face and my pockets with them each time I go! 😛 [http://www.ghirardelli.com/store/shop-products/collections/squares.html/?gclid=CLGM9qCZxbsCFYlDMgodzAYASA](http://www.ghirardelli.com/store/shop-products/collections/squares.html/?gclid=CLGM9qCZxbsCFYlDMgodzAYASA) ---
**Author:** ![Tabby\_Cat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Tabby\_Cat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tabby_Cat)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2013, 1:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/micro-rant-i-hate-thin-chocolate/676987/3 "2013-12-23T01:43:40Z")
> [@Lumpy](#): > > But IMHO, for some reason the thinner chocolate bars are, \*the more they taste like cocoa-flavored wax. \* So you’ve had Hershey’s lately, then? ---
**Author:** ![Try2B\_Comprehensive](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/try2b_comprehensive/32/65_2.png) [@Try2B\_Comprehensive](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Try2B_Comprehensive)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2013, 2:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/micro-rant-i-hate-thin-chocolate/676987/4 "2013-12-23T02:09:28Z")
I spent $7 for a very thin Italian chocolate bar for my gf’s stocking. I’ll let you know if she likes it. In fact, I should insist on a bite now that there is a controversy. ---
**Author:** ![Chimera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/8e8cbc/32.png) [@Chimera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chimera)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2013, 2:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/micro-rant-i-hate-thin-chocolate/676987/5 "2013-12-23T02:11:54Z")
There is only Dark Chocolate. All else is pretend chocolate. ---
**Author:** ![Trinopus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/2bfe46/32.png) [@Trinopus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Trinopus)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2013, 2:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/micro-rant-i-hate-thin-chocolate/676987/6 "2013-12-23T02:24:14Z")
But what if I happen to like pretend chocolate? The terrible truth is that there’s a market for damn near anything in this world. The even more terrible truth is that sometimes the market for crud is stronger than the market for high-quality stuff, and so the latter becomes harder to find and much more expensive. This is fine for slobs like me, who enjoy the crud. I’m absolutely into mass-produced American candy bars. Gimme a Three Musketeers, and I’m happy. The market moves goods; it doesn’t judge 'em. This can be a bummer for people who do judge goods. ---
**Author:** ![John\_Mace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_mace/32/185_2.png) [@John\_Mace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_Mace)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2013, 2:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/micro-rant-i-hate-thin-chocolate/676987/7 "2013-12-23T02:42:53Z")
I buy the Lindt 85% cocoa bars. They’ve been the same size as long as I can remember, and they’re the same size today. But that doesn’t mean I don’t Jones for a snickers bar every now and then, too. ---
**Author:** ![digs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/digs/32/14889_2.png) [@digs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/digs)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2013, 3:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/micro-rant-i-hate-thin-chocolate/676987/8 "2013-12-23T03:28:42Z")
> [@John\_Mace](#): > > I buy the Lindt 85% cocoa bars. They’ve been the same size as long as I can remember, and they’re the same size today. But that doesn’t mean I don’t Jones for a snickers bar every now and then, too. I love a Snickers once in a while, but a Lindt? Or a Milka? Mmmmmm… I finally got back to the family homestead in Switzerland, and the best thing about the trip was [the huge Milka bar I bought every day.](http://www.travelblog.org/Photos/2061509) > [@](#): > > Micro-rant: I hate thin chocolate I like big bars And I cannot lie… ---
**Author:** ![SerafinaPekala](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecae2f/32.png) [@SerafinaPekala](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SerafinaPekala)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2013, 3:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/micro-rant-i-hate-thin-chocolate/676987/9 "2013-12-23T03:33:09Z")
> [@digs](#): > > I love a Snickers once in a while, but a Lindt? Or a Milka? Mmmmmm… I finally got back to the family homestead in Switzerland, and the best thing about the trip was [the huge Milka bar I bought every day.](http://www.travelblog.org/Photos/2061509) > > I like big bars > And I cannot lie… Choccy porn!! _heavy breathing_ ---
**Author:** ![SerafinaPekala](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecae2f/32.png) [@SerafinaPekala](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SerafinaPekala)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2013, 3:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/micro-rant-i-hate-thin-chocolate/676987/10 "2013-12-23T03:34:11Z")
> [@Chimera](#): > > There is only Dark Chocolate. > > All else is pretend chocolate. I tend to agree. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Peaton\_of\_peat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ecae2f/32.png) [@Peaton\_of\_peat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Peaton_of_peat)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2013, 7:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/micro-rant-i-hate-thin-chocolate/676987/11 "2013-12-23T07:31:43Z")
What is this, The Cafe Pit? Whatever, you might want to try the chocolate at Aldi, it’s German and Austrian chocolate at a good price, and it’s good quality chocolate. Something like $2 for 6 oz and you can get good thick bars. The UK recipe milk chocolate (made in Germany) is a great crumb chocolate and is my personal favorite. The Austrian milk chocolate they is good but not as good. What can I say, I’m an Aldi fanatic but I also like good chocolate. Get good chocolate. Too bad good chocolate is a luxury in the US these days. Even Nestle chocolate is gritty and overloaded with vanillin. ---
**Author:** ![anya\_marie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ebca7d/32.png) [@anya\_marie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/anya_marie)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2013, 7:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/micro-rant-i-hate-thin-chocolate/676987/12 "2013-12-23T07:50:29Z")
That is PRECISELY the reason that I quit buying Hershey products, and there are waaayyyy better chocolate choices. It does not help Hershey’s that I live twenty minutes from a factory that makes bettter choccolate for a little more money (Albanes Confections.) Have not tried the Aldi products yet but perhaps I can stop in before work and pick some up. I do suffer under the occasional jones for a Snickers or Three Musketeers bar. ---
**Author:** ![oz0ne](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/9fc348/32.png) [@oz0ne](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/oz0ne)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2013, 3:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/micro-rant-i-hate-thin-chocolate/676987/13 "2013-12-23T15:34:28Z")
Wait. There’s something other than Hershey when it comes to chocolate? I’ll be damned. This American cocoon is killing me. ---
**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2013, 4:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/micro-rant-i-hate-thin-chocolate/676987/14 "2013-12-23T16:12:42Z")
Hershey is not chocolate. ---
**Author:** ![QuickSilver](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quicksilver/32/7832_2.png) [@QuickSilver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/QuickSilver)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2013, 4:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/micro-rant-i-hate-thin-chocolate/676987/15 "2013-12-23T16:43:22Z")
Boutique chocolateries aside, Lake Champlain chocolates are maybe some of the best these days. Ghirardelli doesn’t even compare. Anything that isn’t dark chocolate is not chocolate. Also, candy bars are not chocolate. Ritter Sport dark chocolate with whole hazelnuts being the exception. ---
**Author:** ![RitterSport](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rittersport/32/6326_2.png) [@RitterSport](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RitterSport)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2013, 4:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/micro-rant-i-hate-thin-chocolate/676987/16 "2013-12-23T16:48:56Z")
> [@QuickSilver](#): > > Boutique chocolateries aside, Lake Champlain chocolates are maybe some of the best these days. Ghirardelli doesn’t even compare. > > Anything that isn’t dark chocolate is not chocolate. > > Also, candy bars are not chocolate. Ritter Sport dark chocolate with whole hazelnuts being the exception. Thanks! ---
**Author:** ![QuickSilver](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quicksilver/32/7832_2.png) [@QuickSilver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/QuickSilver)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2013, 5:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/micro-rant-i-hate-thin-chocolate/676987/17 "2013-12-23T17:09:35Z")
> [@RitterSport](#): > > Thanks! OMG! A talking chocolate!! ---
**Author:** ![RitterSport](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rittersport/32/6326_2.png) [@RitterSport](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RitterSport)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2013, 5:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/micro-rant-i-hate-thin-chocolate/676987/18 "2013-12-23T17:15:22Z")
> [@QuickSilver](#): > > OMG! A talking chocolate!! Not just talking, but cannibalistic. Mmmmm, talking cannibalistic chocolate… _drool_[/Homer] ---
**Author:** ![Peaton\_of\_peat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ecae2f/32.png) [@Peaton\_of\_peat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Peaton_of_peat)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2013, 5:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/micro-rant-i-hate-thin-chocolate/676987/19 "2013-12-23T17:57:26Z")
> [@QuickSilver](#): > > Also, candy bars are not chocolate. This is usually literally true by the way. As in, they have “chocolatey coating” and not “chocolate coating,” which isn’t marketers being cutesy, it’s a legal requirement. Look at the ingredients; if it’s “chocolate” it’ll have cocoa/chocolate liquor and cocoa butter in it, if it’s some kind of “quasi-chocolate” it’ll have cocoa powder and vegetable oil or tallow. I was really surprised when I bought Mexican not-Oreos, Gamesa Giro, and saw chocolate liquor in the ingredients. Sure enough, on the front it says "chocolate sandwich cookies. True story, when Nestle bought Baby Ruth, they replaced the compound coating with actual chocolate, but then they changed it back because people complained that it wasn’t what they were used to. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2013, 6:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/micro-rant-i-hate-thin-chocolate/676987/20 "2013-12-23T18:23:07Z")
Ritter Sport are the best chocolates (and dark chocolate with hazelnuts are some of my favourites). Certain Dopers make me hunger for good chocolate every time I see their name in a post. 😃 [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/micro-rant-i-hate-thin-chocolate/676987.md?page=2)