# "Microagression Theory" seems like a silly concept but the wiki is actually kind of interesting **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [December 5, 2015, 5:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/microagression-theory-seems-like-a-silly-concept-but-the-wiki-is-actually-kind-of-interesting/739495 "2015-12-05T05:15:44Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![Emtar\_KronJonDerSohn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/58956e/32.png) [@Emtar\_KronJonDerSohn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Emtar_KronJonDerSohn)\ **Post date:** [December 7, 2015, 11:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/microagression-theory-seems-like-a-silly-concept-but-the-wiki-is-actually-kind-of-interesting/739495/61 "2015-12-07T11:18:39Z")
> [@Isamu](#): > > That’s EXACTLY > …what I have never said in my life. You said to observe how the waiter treats other couples and use common sense. I apparently misinterpreted that. Would you care to shed any light on what you did say? ---
**Author:** ![even\_sven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/dfb087/32.png) [@even\_sven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/even_sven)\ **Post date:** [December 7, 2015, 12:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/microagression-theory-seems-like-a-silly-concept-but-the-wiki-is-actually-kind-of-interesting/739495/62 "2015-12-07T12:07:19Z")
Nm ---
**Author:** ![Krouget](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/b38774/32.png) [@Krouget](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Krouget)\ **Post date:** [December 7, 2015, 2:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/microagression-theory-seems-like-a-silly-concept-but-the-wiki-is-actually-kind-of-interesting/739495/63 "2015-12-07T14:25:55Z")
> [@you\_with\_the\_face](#): > > In my experience, racial microagressions play out much like this recent [Kool-Aid](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sTskrY1itRY) quip. > > Was the host trying to be malicious? I see no evidence of that. It’s clear that he was just trying to be funny. Maybe he jokes like this with his black buddies all the time and didn’t realize how random and offensive it would come across. His intent may have been benign, but that didn’t keep it from being jarring as fuck. > > But that alone isn’t what makes comments like this exasperating. It’s the circumstances that often go along with them. For example, by virtue of being on live TV, the chef in that clip was put in the awkward position of having to respond to that Kool-Aid question nicely and politely. Doing otherwise would have drawn more attention to the gaffe and ruined the entire production. And let’s be real: if she’d called him out, it is likely she’d be criticized for being a “hypersensitive, crazy bitch” who goes looking for reasons to be offended. So not only does she have to stand there and be demeaned by a unfunny joke on live television, she is not empowered to respond to it with the candidness it deserves. Because it’s just a “microaggression” and as such, can be swept away as no big deal or imagined. To complain about them while their happening is to make people uncomfortable, and you can’t do that! > > I don’t know why this concept requires so much analysis, when there’s nothing new about the phenomenon at all. For Christ’s sake, Norman Lear sitcoms from the 70’s profited from the existence of microaggressions and the idiots who perpetrate them cluelessly, to humorous effect. Why are we acting like we don’t remember Archie Bunker-style back-handed compliments all of a sudden? Absolutely spot-on. Good post which describes the concept quite accurately, especially the part regarding her response. ---
**Author:** ![dracoi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/90db22/32.png) [@dracoi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dracoi)\ **Post date:** [December 7, 2015, 5:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/microagression-theory-seems-like-a-silly-concept-but-the-wiki-is-actually-kind-of-interesting/739495/64 "2015-12-07T17:19:15Z")
It seems odd to me that the people who believe in microaggressions don’t understand how offensive and aggressive a term like “microaggression” is. ---
**Author:** ![Jimmy\_Chitwood](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/f475e1/32.png) [@Jimmy\_Chitwood](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jimmy_Chitwood)\ **Post date:** [December 7, 2015, 5:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/microagression-theory-seems-like-a-silly-concept-but-the-wiki-is-actually-kind-of-interesting/739495/65 "2015-12-07T17:45:07Z")
> [@dracoi](#): > > It seems odd to me that the people who believe in microaggressions don’t understand how offensive and aggressive a term like “microaggression” is. I think you’ll find that as patently obvious a point this may be to you, it’s going to require some more exposition for other people to understand it. Aggressive toward whom? ---
**Author:** ![botsgotme](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/91b2a8/32.png) [@botsgotme](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/botsgotme)\ **Post date:** [December 7, 2015, 8:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/microagression-theory-seems-like-a-silly-concept-but-the-wiki-is-actually-kind-of-interesting/739495/66 "2015-12-07T20:12:13Z")
The concept of “Microaggressions” goes hand in hand with “Hate Crimes”. In both cases, it is a way to vastly increase the intrusiveness of the law, and expand the scope of litigation. Once made, the charge of microaggression will be almost impossible to defend against, and judges will be free to add anything they want onto punishments. it is another chapter in the transition of the USA, from democracy to socialist dictatorship. Wait until it is a crime to look the wrong way at certain people. ---
**Author:** ![iiandyiiii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/iiandyiiii/32/7924_2.png) [@iiandyiiii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/iiandyiiii)\ **Post date:** [December 7, 2015, 8:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/microagression-theory-seems-like-a-silly-concept-but-the-wiki-is-actually-kind-of-interesting/739495/67 "2015-12-07T20:30:16Z")
> [@botsgotme](#): > > The concept of “Microaggressions” goes hand in hand with “Hate Crimes”. In both cases, it is a way to vastly increase the intrusiveness of the law, and expand the scope of litigation. Once made, the charge of microaggression will be almost impossible to defend against, and judges will be free to add anything they want onto punishments. > it is another chapter in the transition of the USA, from democracy to socialist dictatorship. Wait until it is a crime to look the wrong way at certain people. Who is advocating that microaggressions be criminalized? I certainly would oppose this. I don’t know of anyone, liberal or otherwise, who wants microaggressions barred by law. ---
**Author:** ![Jragon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/e19b73/32.png) [@Jragon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jragon)\ **Post date:** [December 7, 2015, 9:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/microagression-theory-seems-like-a-silly-concept-but-the-wiki-is-actually-kind-of-interesting/739495/68 "2015-12-07T21:30:03Z")
> [@iiandyiiii](#): > > Who is advocating that microaggressions be criminalized? I certainly would oppose this. I don’t know of anyone, liberal or otherwise, who wants microaggressions barred by law. I’ve met a couple. But nobody takes them seriously. ---
**Author:** ![treis](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/bc79bd/32.png) [@treis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/treis)\ **Post date:** [December 7, 2015, 9:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/microagression-theory-seems-like-a-silly-concept-but-the-wiki-is-actually-kind-of-interesting/739495/69 "2015-12-07T21:53:11Z")
> [@Green\_Bean](#): > > And yet, so often, they grossly mispronounce the name…sometimes pausing dumbly and then flubbing it badly. I get why that is annoying. I’ve lived in countries where seemingly no one could pronounce my name correctly. If that were my own country, it’d get old fast. It’s hard for me to see that as: > [@](#): > > microaggressions as including statements that repeat or affirm stereotypes about the minority group or subtly demean it, that position the dominant culture as normal and the minority one as aberrant or pathological To turn it around, when immigrants can’t pronounce American names we don’t see that as demeaning American culture or casting it as pathological. ---
**Author:** ![astro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/9dc877/32.png) [@astro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/astro)\ **Post date:** [December 7, 2015, 10:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/microagression-theory-seems-like-a-silly-concept-but-the-wiki-is-actually-kind-of-interesting/739495/70 "2015-12-07T22:06:00Z")
> [@botsgotme](#): > > The concept of “Microaggressions” goes hand in hand with “Hate Crimes”. In both cases, it is a way to vastly increase the intrusiveness of the law, and expand the scope of litigation. Once made, the charge of microaggression will be almost impossible to defend against, and judges will be free to add anything they want onto punishments. > it is another chapter in the transition of the USA, from democracy to socialist dictatorship. Wait until it is a crime to look the wrong way at certain people. The US is about the least socialist first world, industrialized democracy on the face of the earth. Please name a first world, industrialized representative democracy that is _less_ socialist than the US or I’m going to have to assume you are simply spouting gibbering nonsense. ---
**Author:** ![Fiveyearlurker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/da6949/32.png) [@Fiveyearlurker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fiveyearlurker)\ **Post date:** [December 7, 2015, 10:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/microagression-theory-seems-like-a-silly-concept-but-the-wiki-is-actually-kind-of-interesting/739495/71 "2015-12-07T22:44:13Z")
In order to prove that I don’t consider women inferior, I shouldn’t hold the door open for them, but am I supposed to slam doors in everyone’s faces, or just women’s faces in order to be less aggressive? ---
**Author:** ![iiandyiiii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/iiandyiiii/32/7924_2.png) [@iiandyiiii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/iiandyiiii)\ **Post date:** [December 7, 2015, 11:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/microagression-theory-seems-like-a-silly-concept-but-the-wiki-is-actually-kind-of-interesting/739495/72 "2015-12-07T23:22:10Z")
> [@Fiveyearlurker](#): > > In order to prove that I don’t consider women inferior, I shouldn’t hold the door open for them, but am I supposed to slam doors in everyone’s faces, or just women’s faces in order to be less aggressive? Why not hold the door open for everyone? ---
**Author:** ![treis](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/bc79bd/32.png) [@treis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/treis)\ **Post date:** [December 7, 2015, 11:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/microagression-theory-seems-like-a-silly-concept-but-the-wiki-is-actually-kind-of-interesting/739495/73 "2015-12-07T23:27:42Z")
> [@iiandyiiii](#): > > Why not hold the door open for everyone? How would a random woman know he holds the door open for everyone? ---
**Author:** ![Ambivalid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a5b964/32.png) [@Ambivalid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ambivalid)\ **Post date:** [December 7, 2015, 11:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/microagression-theory-seems-like-a-silly-concept-but-the-wiki-is-actually-kind-of-interesting/739495/74 "2015-12-07T23:29:53Z")
> [@iiandyiiii](#): > > Why not hold the door open for everyone? Exactly. It’s part of our social structure. Now, I don’t mind (even enjoy) having the door held open for me, when the person holding it has just passed thru the same door. Like I said, it’s part of our social structure. However, when people rush from fifty feet away in order to _beat me_ to the door I am approaching, just so they can open it for me, that crosses a line for me. I’ve even had people try to wrestle the door out of my hands, in order to hold it for me (they end up surprised by my death grip ;)). ---
**Author:** ![Fiveyearlurker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/da6949/32.png) [@Fiveyearlurker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fiveyearlurker)\ **Post date:** [December 7, 2015, 11:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/microagression-theory-seems-like-a-silly-concept-but-the-wiki-is-actually-kind-of-interesting/739495/75 "2015-12-07T23:38:37Z")
> [@iiandyiiii](#): > > Why not hold the door open for everyone? How do you know that I don’t? (I do, as does pretty much everyone). But, if you want to walk away from the experience of my having held the door open for you as a microagression, you get to do that, despite being wrong. And, any attempt for me to explain that I hold the door open for everyone becomes “mansplaining”. It’s somehow an iron clad combination of me being an asshole for holding the door open for people. So, I ask again, should I slam to door in women’s faces or everyone’s faces to avoid this problem? ---
**Author:** ![MandaJo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ac91a4/32.png) [@MandaJo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MandaJo)\ **Post date:** [December 7, 2015, 11:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/microagression-theory-seems-like-a-silly-concept-but-the-wiki-is-actually-kind-of-interesting/739495/76 "2015-12-07T23:47:33Z")
> [@Fiveyearlurker](#): > > How do you know that I don’t? (I do, as does pretty much everyone). > > But, if you want to walk away from the experience of my having held the door open for you as a microagression, you get to do that, despite being wrong. And, any attempt for me to explain that I hold the door open for everyone becomes “mansplaining”. It’s somehow an iron clad combination of me being an asshole for holding the door open for people. > > So, I ask again, should I slam to door in women’s faces or everyone’s faces to avoid this problem? Holding the door open for a woman is not a micro-aggression. What might be construed as a micro-aggression is making a face of dissatisfaction when a woman holds a door open for you, or refusing to go through a door if a woman holds it open for you. I’ve had that happen and it genuinely made me feel like crap–both because I was trying to be nice, and someone rejected that from me, and because their was the clear implication that somehow I was being uncouth by not deferring. It’s not a big deal–it’s not a thing I think I’ve ever even talked about before–but it’s the kind of little thing that I can imagine adds up for a lot of people. ---
**Author:** ![Maggie\_the\_Ocelot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/df705f/32.png) [@Maggie\_the\_Ocelot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Maggie_the_Ocelot)\ **Post date:** [December 8, 2015, 12:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/microagression-theory-seems-like-a-silly-concept-but-the-wiki-is-actually-kind-of-interesting/739495/77 "2015-12-08T00:00:06Z")
> [@MandaJo](#): > > Holding the door open for a woman is not a micro-aggression. What might be construed as a micro-aggression is making a face of dissatisfaction when a woman holds a door open for you, or refusing to go through a door if a woman holds it open for you. Yup. Or them being closer to the front of the elevator, and refusing to get off (at the same floor) until I do. Come on, we both just want to get where we’re going, you are closer to the front, get out of the damn elevator already.:smack: ---
**Author:** ![Fiveyearlurker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/da6949/32.png) [@Fiveyearlurker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fiveyearlurker)\ **Post date:** [December 8, 2015, 12:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/microagression-theory-seems-like-a-silly-concept-but-the-wiki-is-actually-kind-of-interesting/739495/78 "2015-12-08T00:03:22Z")
> [@MandaJo](#): > > Holding the door open for a woman is not a micro-aggression. If you’re looking for it to be, is [is](http://everydayfeminism.com/2015/08/for-nice-guys-who-dont-get-it/). Again, note that if a random man holds the door for you, you have absolutely no idea if he holds the door for everyone. I would submit that the vast (VAST!) majority do. But, this comic went viral on facebook to try to teach men not to hold the door open for women by assuming this odd, and imaginary, inner monologue going on in men’s heads. Maybe some people are just good people. ---
**Author:** ![Ambivalid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a5b964/32.png) [@Ambivalid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ambivalid)\ **Post date:** [December 8, 2015, 12:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/microagression-theory-seems-like-a-silly-concept-but-the-wiki-is-actually-kind-of-interesting/739495/79 "2015-12-08T00:50:07Z")
> [@MandaJo](#): > > Holding the door open for a woman is not a micro-aggression. What might be construed as a micro-aggression is making a face of dissatisfaction when a woman holds a door open for you, or\*\* refusing to go through a door if a woman holds it open for you\*\*. I’ve had that happen and it genuinely made me feel like crap–both because I was trying to be nice, and someone rejected that from me, and because their was the clear implication that somehow I was being uncouth by not deferring. > > It’s not a big deal–it’s not a thing I think I’ve ever even talked about before–but it’s the kind of little thing that I can imagine adds up for a lot of people. I’ve actually had this happen to me too. Well, not as a woman, of course, but as someone who uses a wheelchair. It absolutely astounded me. This was a couple years ago, I was entering a tanning salon (I was training/preparing for a bodybuilding competiton) and there were a couple of women approaching the door behind me. Rather than just open it and go inside, I grabbed the door handle and pulled it and myself back, to hold it open for these two ladies. To my surprise, they balked, with one woman saying something like, “Oh well thanks but I’ll get that for you”. :dubious: Now, I was just sitting there, with the door wide fucking open, waiting for these ladies to pass thru. I politely smiled at the lady and said, “Don’t be silly, I’m holding the door for you.” At that point, her friend went and walked into the salon. But she just stood there, _refusing to go thru the door_. She wouldn’t do it because, dammit, _she_ was supposed to hold the door for _me!!_ She couldn’t be offended like this! I was in a wheelchair! 😃 After about a minute of us both just standing (and sitting) there, I just said “whatever you want” and turned and went inside. It was utterly ridiculous and not worth my time. But wow. And it wasn’t even a man! ---
**Author:** ![Ibanez](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/a4c791/32.png) [@Ibanez](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ibanez)\ **Post date:** [December 8, 2015, 1:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/microagression-theory-seems-like-a-silly-concept-but-the-wiki-is-actually-kind-of-interesting/739495/80 "2015-12-08T01:14:15Z")
> [@iiandyiiii](#): > > Why not hold the door open for everyone? I use to until I had a women tell me one time. “I don’t need a man to hold the door open for me.” It wasn’t like I was waiting for her, I got there a second or two before her. Since I can’t read every women’s mind. I only hold doors open for men now. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/microagression-theory-seems-like-a-silly-concept-but-the-wiki-is-actually-kind-of-interesting/739495.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/microagression-theory-seems-like-a-silly-concept-but-the-wiki-is-actually-kind-of-interesting/739495.md?page=5)