# Military folks: what are the best hilariously inaccurate military movies / scenes? **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [April 16, 2013, 7:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/military-folks-what-are-the-best-hilariously-inaccurate-military-movies-scenes/655860 "2013-04-16T19:28:58Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![Sicks\_Ate](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/258eb7/32.png) [@Sicks\_Ate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sicks_Ate)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2013, 12:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/military-folks-what-are-the-best-hilariously-inaccurate-military-movies-scenes/655860/61 "2013-04-18T12:49:51Z")
Without reading to see if it’s been mentioned: Heartbreak Ridge. ---
**Author:** ![Smapti](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/smapti/32/17938_2.png) [@Smapti](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Smapti)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2013, 1:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/military-folks-what-are-the-best-hilariously-inaccurate-military-movies-scenes/655860/62 "2013-04-18T13:18:39Z")
> [@spifflog](#): > > James Kirk, a kid who isn’t even a graduate of Star Fleet academy, taking over command of the flag ship! > > This is like a Sophomore or Junior at the Naval Academy on a summer cruise on the newest, biggest, baddest aircraft carrier in the fleet, somehow taking over command over the ohh, tens or hundreds of real Officers on the ship! The fact that pretty much everyone who outranks him is _dead_ at that point, and the surviving officers aren’t line personnel, may have been a contributing factor. ---
**Author:** ![Alessan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alessan/32/465_2.png) [@Alessan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alessan)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2013, 1:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/military-folks-what-are-the-best-hilariously-inaccurate-military-movies-scenes/655860/63 "2013-04-18T13:19:14Z")
Plus, he did save the freakin’ planet. ---
**Author:** ![spifflog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c5a1d2/32.png) [@spifflog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/spifflog)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2013, 1:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/military-folks-what-are-the-best-hilariously-inaccurate-military-movies-scenes/655860/64 "2013-04-18T13:36:16Z")
> [@Smapti](#): > > The fact that pretty much everyone who outranks him is _dead_ at that point, and the surviving officers aren’t line personnel, may have been a contributing factor. It’s the Naval Officer in me that ruins it for me I know. Except the ship would be filled with Navy (Star Fleet) Officers almost all who are line Officers, so there is just no way that could happen! I’m laughing out loud here at my desk picturing a college sophomore in command of the USS Nimitz! ---
**Author:** ![spifflog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c5a1d2/32.png) [@spifflog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/spifflog)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2013, 1:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/military-folks-what-are-the-best-hilariously-inaccurate-military-movies-scenes/655860/65 "2013-04-18T13:58:20Z")
> [@Alessan](#): > > Plus, he did save the freakin’ planet. There’s that. ---
**Author:** ![smiling\_bandit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e9a140/32.png) [@smiling\_bandit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/smiling_bandit)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2013, 2:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/military-folks-what-are-the-best-hilariously-inaccurate-military-movies-scenes/655860/66 "2013-04-18T14:29:19Z")
Not a specific movie or scene, but any time I see people walk right into each other’s line of fire, it drives me nuts. You never ever _ever_ whenever do this, period. I’m not saying it can’t happen at considerable range, but if somebody’s shooting, you don’t get in the path of the bullets! Where this really annoys me is when they depict special forces/super-special-awesome-duper special forces/black ops professionals/whatever carefully planning their squad movements so as to walk directly in front of their own teammate’s guns. This means that if a fight were to break out, they’d be shooting _you_. Now, you can do something like this, but it means the people in back move their firearms so they aren’t aiming at your back. ---
**Author:** ![aruvqan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aruvqan/32/2891_2.png) [@aruvqan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/aruvqan)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2013, 3:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/military-folks-what-are-the-best-hilariously-inaccurate-military-movies-scenes/655860/67 "2013-04-18T15:27:56Z")
Well, I lived with a SEAL, and lived in Virginia Beach, Portsmouth and Norfolk VA, and spent a fair amount of time on the Amphib Base [and actually in the para loft] Going by Charlie Sheen’s movie Navy SEALs, first thing that jumps out at me - there is no Navy fiancee who is going to actually be standing at the altar and when all the pagers go off to call everybody back will let the man get away without the shortest version of a wedding ceremony. Actually, you have 30 minutes to get back and they were in the base chapel, so they had more than enough time for a sort ceremony. Then there is the issue of how he got to work, if you look at a map of Tidewater, he starts in Virginia Beach [I recognized the apartments he lived in as on the southern end of the Strip] crosses the James River til he is in Portsmouth, and then jumps into the James River, and swims around the landmass that is Norfolk until he gets to the Amphib Base. I personally would have driven up Va Beach Blvd to N Great Neck and hung a left onto Shore Drive. Then there is the too many chiefs, not enough indians problem. I think everybody in the unit except for a lonely enlisted cannon fodder and a single chief were all officers. _sigh_ ---
**Author:** ![Poysyn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/f4b2a3/32.png) [@Poysyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Poysyn)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2013, 4:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/military-folks-what-are-the-best-hilariously-inaccurate-military-movies-scenes/655860/68 "2013-04-18T16:15:21Z")
I will leave aside the hundreds of movies that cause me to gnash my teeth because the ejection port covers are open and bolts fully back (showing an empty magazine) while the gunfire sound continues to clatter away and add from my own personal job… Any movie or TV show where the spokesperson either says “no comment”. The media have gotten more military-savvy and you can just tell them “I can’t get into that due to Operational Security” or “I am not the right person to speak to that” and there is never any issue, why would there be? No comment is never used and is actually taught to be one of the singularly stupidest things you can say to the media. ---
**Author:** ![Intergalactic\_Gladiator](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/intergalactic_gladiator/32/112_2.png) [@Intergalactic\_Gladiator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Intergalactic_Gladiator)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2013, 4:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/military-folks-what-are-the-best-hilariously-inaccurate-military-movies-scenes/655860/69 "2013-04-18T16:30:37Z")
In the movie [The Fourth War](http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0099606/), an American officer squares off against his commie counterpart begin a feud that escalates until both sides are knuckles deep. I seem to recall it being a decent enough movie with some taut drama and stuff up until the very end when all the Russian and US troops are pointing rifles at the two officers. All of the rifles, M16s and AK-47s, had laser scopes on them. I realize that it was for the added drama that the two old war horses see they have the weapons aimed at them in slo mo and they get a moment to realize the error of their ways and all that but I have never seen an infantryman with a laser scope. The US Army doesn’t generally issue those to their troops and it seems like a very easy way to get yourself killed in a modern battlefield. ---
**Author:** ![shiftless](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e9c0ed/32.png) [@shiftless](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/shiftless)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2013, 4:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/military-folks-what-are-the-best-hilariously-inaccurate-military-movies-scenes/655860/70 "2013-04-18T16:44:41Z")
> [@spifflog](#): > > This is like a Sophomore or Junior at the Naval Academy on a summer cruise on the newest, biggest, baddest aircraft carrier in the fleet, somehow taking over command over the ohh, tens or hundreds of real Officers on the ship! Such complete and total crap that it took me out of the film. In this example the Captain actually made Kirk second in command. As I understand it any ship captain can just point at someone and say “you’re in command” and it’s done, right? I would have loved a scene where Kirk encountered the XO and tried to explain how the captain just put him in charge of the ship. “No, really, he said I’m in command!” ---
**Author:** ![Skywatcher](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/skywatcher/32/254_2.png) [@Skywatcher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skywatcher)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2013, 4:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/military-folks-what-are-the-best-hilariously-inaccurate-military-movies-scenes/655860/71 "2013-04-18T16:47:03Z")
> [@Ranger\_Jeff](#): > > “The Green Berets” was hilarious. From the beginning with a SF COL as old as Wayne to the movie ending with the sun setting in the East, it was a laugh fest. Unless they were supposed to be near Vung Tau, a popular R&R spot near Saigon, where [one can look west and see the sun setting over the South China Sea](https://maps.google.com/maps?q=Ho+Chi+Minh+City,+Ho+Chi+Minh+City,+Vietnam&hl=en&ll=10.358173,107.060158&spn=0.000952,0.002411&sll=38.003385,-79.420925&sspn=6.897417,9.876709&oq=ho+&t=h&hnear=Ho+Chi+Minh+City,+Vietnam&z=19&layer=c&cbll=10.358173,107.060158&cbp=11,0,,0,0&photoid=po-67887097). ---
**Author:** ![Sitnam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Sitnam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sitnam)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2013, 5:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/military-folks-what-are-the-best-hilariously-inaccurate-military-movies-scenes/655860/72 "2013-04-18T17:25:51Z")
> [@gaffa](#): > > Any knowledgeable person is going to see something annoyingly inaccurate about their field in pretty much any movie that features it. True that, not my field but area of interest, I don’t think I’ve ever seen one scene where characters weren’t wearing a 600 year range of armor from both before and after the era the movie depicts and styles from all over Europe. Often all on the same person. ---
**Author:** ![spifflog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c5a1d2/32.png) [@spifflog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/spifflog)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2013, 5:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/military-folks-what-are-the-best-hilariously-inaccurate-military-movies-scenes/655860/73 "2013-04-18T17:54:24Z")
> [@shiftless](#): > > In this example the Captain actually made Kirk second in command. As I understand it any ship captain can just point at someone and say “you’re in command” and it’s done, right? No, surprisingly enough, that’s not how it’s done. (In the 1% chance I’m not being whoshed!!) ---
**Author:** ![Alessan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alessan/32/465_2.png) [@Alessan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alessan)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2013, 5:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/military-folks-what-are-the-best-hilariously-inaccurate-military-movies-scenes/655860/74 "2013-04-18T17:54:55Z")
> [@Intergalactic\_Gladiator](#): > > In the movie [The Fourth War](http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0099606/), an American officer squares off against his commie counterpart begin a feud that escalates until both sides are knuckles deep. I seem to recall it being a decent enough movie with some taut drama and stuff up until the very end when all the Russian and US troops are pointing rifles at the two officers. All of the rifles, M16s and AK-47s, had laser scopes on them. I realize that it was for the added drama that the two old war horses see they have the weapons aimed at them in slo mo and they get a moment to realize the error of their ways and all that but I have never seen an infantryman with a laser scope. The US Army doesn’t generally issue those to their troops and it seems like a very easy way to get yourself killed in a modern battlefield. Look at the rectangular object on the top of [this guy’s](http://onlyhdwallpapers.com/wallpaper/iraq_soldier_barbarian_epic_warrior_high_resolution_desktop_1600x1070_hd-wallpaper-709143.jpg) rifle, near the front iron sight - I’m pretty sure that that’s a combination flashlight/laser sight. I’ve seen them in plenty of pictures from Iraq and A-stan. That said, they certainly weren’t common during the Cold War What really bugs me though, is when movies have \*snipers \*with laser sights. The only - \*only \*- thing this does is let the target know that someone is aiming at him, which is the generally last thing a sniper wants. It certainly doesn’t help the sniper aim. ---
**Author:** ![mlees](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ba8739/32.png) [@mlees](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mlees)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2013, 7:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/military-folks-what-are-the-best-hilariously-inaccurate-military-movies-scenes/655860/75 "2013-04-18T19:04:15Z")
> [@Alessan](#): > > Look at the rectangular object on the top of [this guy’s](http://onlyhdwallpapers.com/wallpaper/iraq_soldier_barbarian_epic_warrior_high_resolution_desktop_1600x1070_hd-wallpaper-709143.jpg) rifle, near the front iron sight - I’m pretty sure that that’s a combination flashlight/laser sight. I’ve seen them in plenty of pictures from Iraq and A-stan. That said, they certainly weren’t common during the Cold War > > What really bugs me though, is when movies have \*snipers \*with laser sights. The only - \*only \*- thing this does is let the target know that someone is aiming at him, which is the generally last thing a sniper wants. It certainly doesn’t help the sniper aim. When I click on your link, it auto-shortens to [onlyhdwallpapers.com](http://onlyhdwallpapers.com) main root site. ---
**Author:** ![Loach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/loach/32/350_2.png) [@Loach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Loach)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2013, 7:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/military-folks-what-are-the-best-hilariously-inaccurate-military-movies-scenes/655860/76 "2013-04-18T19:25:45Z")
> [@aruvqan](#): > > Back in the mid 80s when I was living in Tidewater VA, I used to ‘social engineer’ my way all over various bases. I still have a belt of ammo cases that I collected on Fort Story, and one time I talked my way onto NOB, and all the way across several flightlines to HM14 to pick up a guy I was dating. I frequently went on base and hung out in barracks sewing on patches and altering uniforms for spare cash. Getting onto military bases pre 9-11 was not all that difficult. I wouldn’t try to engineer my way into a nuke storage facility, or certain other secure areas - but many areas were more or less accessible. Even pre-911 the areas around the planes were very secure. You may have been able get around the rest of the base but not there. I remember being on an Air Force flight line with our Army helicopters. A couple of the pilots wandered around a bit. They crossed the yellow line painted on the tarmac near a C-5. Next thing they know they are face down eating asphalt with M-16s pointed at the back of their heads. ---
**Author:** ![gravitycrash](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/977dab/32.png) [@gravitycrash](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gravitycrash)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2013, 7:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/military-folks-what-are-the-best-hilariously-inaccurate-military-movies-scenes/655860/77 "2013-04-18T19:30:20Z")
Grenades making far larger and visible explosions than in reality. Regular frag grenades don’t produce gobs of fire. It makes some smoke and sort of shimmer of air from the percussion, kind of like heat coming off asphalt on a hot day. But that wouldn’t look very dramatic on film. As others have said: The never empty M-16 or other magazine fed guns. How hard is it to get that right? Props for a movie that made an effort to get things right: Shooter with Mark Wahlberg. When they showed him sniping he had his feet splayed flat on the ground, not on his toes like every other war movie shows. Also his finger on the trigger was between his first two joints, which is the correct way, not at the first joint near the tip of his finger. Also he actually was changing magazines on his M-16 during a fire fight! ---
**Author:** ![Loach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/loach/32/350_2.png) [@Loach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Loach)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2013, 7:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/military-folks-what-are-the-best-hilariously-inaccurate-military-movies-scenes/655860/78 "2013-04-18T19:31:43Z")
> [@gravitycrash](#): > > Grenades making far larger and visible explosions than in reality. Regular frag grenades don’t produce gobs of fire. It makes some smoke and sort of shimmer of air from the percussion, kind of like heat coming off asphalt on a hot day. But that wouldn’t look very dramatic on film. Not just grenades, all explosions. ---
**Author:** ![Raguleader](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/258eb7/32.png) [@Raguleader](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Raguleader)\ **Post date:** [April 19, 2013, 12:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/military-folks-what-are-the-best-hilariously-inaccurate-military-movies-scenes/655860/79 "2013-04-19T00:32:18Z")
Fun grenade trivia: The bog-standard grenade used by the US military has a kill radius of something like 30 feet, due to the fact that it is designed to spray shrapnel in all directions. They’re never nearly that powerful in fiction. ---
**Author:** ![smiling\_bandit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e9a140/32.png) [@smiling\_bandit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/smiling_bandit)\ **Post date:** [April 19, 2013, 12:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/military-folks-what-are-the-best-hilariously-inaccurate-military-movies-scenes/655860/80 "2013-04-19T00:46:23Z")
> [@Raguleader](#): > > Fun grenade trivia: The bog-standard grenade used by the US military has a kill radius of something like 30 feet, due to the fact that it is designed to spray shrapnel in all directions. They’re never nearly that powerful in fiction. In fiction, they also cause big orange fiery explosions, whereas IRL it’s a spray of dust and nearly-invisible shrapnel. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/military-folks-what-are-the-best-hilariously-inaccurate-military-movies-scenes/655860.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/military-folks-what-are-the-best-hilariously-inaccurate-military-movies-scenes/655860.md?page=5)