# Military folks: what are the best hilariously inaccurate military movies / scenes? **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [April 16, 2013, 7:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/military-folks-what-are-the-best-hilariously-inaccurate-military-movies-scenes/655860 "2013-04-16T19:28:58Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 6
**Author:** ![terentii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/terentii/32/212_2.png) [@terentii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/terentii)\ **Post date:** [April 20, 2013, 9:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/military-folks-what-are-the-best-hilariously-inaccurate-military-movies-scenes/655860/101 "2013-04-20T21:42:03Z")
Speaking of stripes… I always find it mildly amusing when officers and noncoms are shown going into battle wearing their insignia of rank. AFAIK, they normally take them off beforehand; otherwise they’d be prime targets for snipers. (Bill Mauldin even mentioned this in _Up Front_). ---
**Author:** ![Poysyn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/f4b2a3/32.png) [@Poysyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Poysyn)\ **Post date:** [April 20, 2013, 10:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/military-folks-what-are-the-best-hilariously-inaccurate-military-movies-scenes/655860/102 "2013-04-20T22:24:33Z")
If we are going to start bringing up saluting and drill, this thread will be chapters! _Windtalkers_ had me tearing at my hair in frustration. ---
**Author:** ![Amateur\_Barbarian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/59ef9b/32.png) [@Amateur\_Barbarian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Amateur_Barbarian)\ **Post date:** [April 20, 2013, 11:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/military-folks-what-are-the-best-hilariously-inaccurate-military-movies-scenes/655860/103 "2013-04-20T23:13:34Z")
> [@pancakes3](#): > > To be fair, he did try to go back and correct his mistakes, specifically the way a Death Star properly explodes. Luke still shot first. ---
**Author:** ![terentii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/terentii/32/212_2.png) [@terentii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/terentii)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2013, 12:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/military-folks-what-are-the-best-hilariously-inaccurate-military-movies-scenes/655860/104 "2013-04-21T00:07:54Z")
> [@Amateur\_Barbarian](#): > > Luke still shot first. You mean … Han? :dubious: 😕 ---
**Author:** ![Chimera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/8e8cbc/32.png) [@Chimera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chimera)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2013, 12:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/military-folks-what-are-the-best-hilariously-inaccurate-military-movies-scenes/655860/105 "2013-04-21T00:11:43Z")
> [@Alessan](#): > > Plus, he did save the freakin’ planet. Well, factoring in the loss of ships and crews and the entire planet Vulcan… There’s still no way. You’ think they’d go back to Pike or Spock as Captain with Lieutenant Kirk under them. ---
**Author:** ![RickJay](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/bb73d2/32.png) [@RickJay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RickJay)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2013, 1:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/military-folks-what-are-the-best-hilariously-inaccurate-military-movies-scenes/655860/106 "2013-04-21T01:56:51Z")
> [@terentii](#): > > Never underestimate the incompetence of the Russian military. That worked out well for the Germans. No, wait. ---
**Author:** ![terentii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/terentii/32/212_2.png) [@terentii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/terentii)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2013, 2:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/military-folks-what-are-the-best-hilariously-inaccurate-military-movies-scenes/655860/107 "2013-04-21T02:35:56Z")
> [@RickJay](#): > > That worked out well for the Germans. > > No, wait. Fifteen million plus vs. a maximum of three million. A case of ants overwhelming an elephant. ---
**Author:** ![AK84](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/85e7bf/32.png) [@AK84](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AK84)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2013, 3:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/military-folks-what-are-the-best-hilariously-inaccurate-military-movies-scenes/655860/108 "2013-04-21T03:15:59Z")
> [@terentii](#): > > Never underestimate the incompetence of the Russian military. Yeah, look at the. Could not even control _Afghanistan_.:p:rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![Raguleader](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/258eb7/32.png) [@Raguleader](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Raguleader)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2013, 5:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/military-folks-what-are-the-best-hilariously-inaccurate-military-movies-scenes/655860/109 "2013-04-21T05:11:56Z")
> [@AK84](#): > > Yeah, look at the. Could not even control _Afghanistan_.:p:rolleyes: Historically, they can’t even keep a hold on Russia. Just saying. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![terentii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/terentii/32/212_2.png) [@terentii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/terentii)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2013, 12:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/military-folks-what-are-the-best-hilariously-inaccurate-military-movies-scenes/655860/110 "2013-04-21T12:43:52Z")
Plus, the Germans were never able to devote their full resources to defeating the Red Army. In the long run, though, I doubt it would have made much difference. They were too few in number and not prepared for subarctic weather conditions. ---
**Author:** ![aruvqan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aruvqan/32/2891_2.png) [@aruvqan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/aruvqan)\ **Post date:** [April 22, 2013, 1:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/military-folks-what-are-the-best-hilariously-inaccurate-military-movies-scenes/655860/111 "2013-04-22T01:39:07Z")
> [@AK84](#): > > Yeah, look at the. Could not even control _Afghanistan_.:p:rolleyes: Hell, the British Army couldn’t control Afghanistan back when they were one of the top armies of the world … [well, actually they tried 3 separate times and failed] ---
**Author:** ![Ranger\_Jeff](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ranger_jeff/32/2065_2.png) [@Ranger\_Jeff](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ranger_Jeff)\ **Post date:** [April 22, 2013, 3:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/military-folks-what-are-the-best-hilariously-inaccurate-military-movies-scenes/655860/112 "2013-04-22T03:22:07Z")
I’ve seen this in a couple of black & white WWII movies where an extra has a Thompson and is manually working the bolt after every shot. It’s obvious to me there’s no blank firing adapter installed and the weapon isn’t cycling. ---
**Author:** ![Patch](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/a183cd/32.png) [@Patch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Patch)\ **Post date:** [April 22, 2013, 4:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/military-folks-what-are-the-best-hilariously-inaccurate-military-movies-scenes/655860/113 "2013-04-22T04:48:52Z")
Not in the military, but I do love movies where you can see someone reloading the M72 LAAW single-shot anti-tank launcher like it was a bazooka. Seen that several times. There was also a movie where the big secret weapon was an M72 with a big night vision scope mounted on it. ---
**Author:** ![CalMeacham](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/calmeacham/32/35_2.png) [@CalMeacham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CalMeacham)\ **Post date:** [April 23, 2013, 1:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/military-folks-what-are-the-best-hilariously-inaccurate-military-movies-scenes/655860/114 "2013-04-23T01:22:26Z")
I’m not military, but I alternately love and cringe at **The Great Escape**. I’ve read and re-read my first copy of Paul Brickhill’s book to rags, and have been fascinated with it and other books on POW escapes. They certainly did hire ex-inmates opf Stalg Luft Drei as advisors, and obviously worked from the sketches in Brickhill’s book. The physical depiction of the camp and the tunnel appear to be spot-on accurate. I’m a bit annoyed at how they condense characters, pointlessly change names, and add non-existent "cute’ backstories that aren’t real (like the accidental POW of “the Forger”, and the story of his blindness and aided escape), and how they felt the need to make a lot of the characters American. (Americans WERE initially at the camp, but they were separated before the escape, and none were among the ones that got out that night. Maybe the filmmmakers figured Americans wouldn’t pay attention to the movie if it only hasd Brits and the occasional Pole or other European.) But I really get annoyed with Steve McQueen’s character, who has no counterpart in the real story, does things that never would have been done by an inmate (they NEVER would have asked somebody to escape _and then get voluntaruily re-captured_. Never. It was hard enough getting someone outside the camp, and it would’ve been heartbreaking to order him to come back. Besides, they had plenty of information about routes and things outside the camp – right down to railroad timetables – from other sources, particularly “tame goons”). Furthermore, he does things that would be guaranteed to get him shot – ----walking over the Warning Wire. (The German machine-gunners in the watchtowers (“goon boxes”) would immediately shoot you if you stuck a nose over that wire. —jumping onto the back of a guard trying to shoot a man climbing over the fence. They wouldn’t hesitate to shoot him, if only to prevent anyone else from think of doing this. – Clotheslining a German soldier riding a motorcycle. – Changing clothes with said cycling German. This would get him shot as a spy when recaptured. ---
**Author:** ![standingwave](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9de0a6/32.png) [@standingwave](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/standingwave)\ **Post date:** [April 23, 2013, 2:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/military-folks-what-are-the-best-hilariously-inaccurate-military-movies-scenes/655860/115 "2013-04-23T02:26:49Z")
> [@CalMeacham](#): > > But I really get annoyed with Steve McQueen’s character, who has no counterpart in the real story, does things that never would have been done by an inmate (they NEVER would have asked somebody to escape _and then get voluntaruily re-captured_. Never. As do I, but there’s a little bit of (local hero) [Jerry Sage](http://www.northcentralhsalumniassociationspokane.com/jerry-sage.html) in Steve McQueen’s character:Sage’s exploits were immortalized in the classic 1963 film _The Great Escape_. The film’s protagonist, portrayed by Steve McQueen, was based largely on Sage’s experiences as a POW. In 1985 the retired Colonel Sage penned his autobiography, titled _Sage: “Dagger” of the O.S.S._ ---
**Author:** ![Doug\_K](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b5ac83/32.png) [@Doug\_K](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Doug_K)\ **Post date:** [April 23, 2013, 6:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/military-folks-what-are-the-best-hilariously-inaccurate-military-movies-scenes/655860/116 "2013-04-23T18:43:59Z")
> [@Loach](#): > > All of them. > > I went to Basic Training at Fort Knox. They filmed Stripes there so it looked pretty real to me. 😃 I was never in the army, but my dad was. He said that up until Sgt. Hulka got injured it was fairly similar to how he remembered basic training. He enlisted in the late 50s. ---
**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\ **Post date:** [April 23, 2013, 6:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/military-folks-what-are-the-best-hilariously-inaccurate-military-movies-scenes/655860/117 "2013-04-23T18:51:19Z")
> [@CalMeacham](#): > > – Changing clothes with said cycling German. This would get him shot as a spy when recaptured. In McQueen’s defense, he **did** join the Germans chasing him across the countryside. ---
**Author:** ![Amateur\_Barbarian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/59ef9b/32.png) [@Amateur\_Barbarian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Amateur_Barbarian)\ **Post date:** [April 23, 2013, 6:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/military-folks-what-are-the-best-hilariously-inaccurate-military-movies-scenes/655860/118 "2013-04-23T18:53:51Z")
> [@terentii](#): > > You mean … Han? :dubious: 😕 It was a lame joke about the Death Star explosion being fixed. ---
**Author:** ![CalMeacham](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/calmeacham/32/35_2.png) [@CalMeacham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CalMeacham)\ **Post date:** [April 23, 2013, 9:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/military-folks-what-are-the-best-hilariously-inaccurate-military-movies-scenes/655860/119 "2013-04-23T21:37:33Z")
> [@standingwave](#): > > As do I, but there’s a little bit of (local hero) [Jerry Sage](http://www.northcentralhsalumniassociationspokane.com/jerry-sage.html) in Steve McQueen’s character:Sage’s exploits were immortalized in the classic 1963 film _The Great Escape_. The film’s protagonist, portrayed by Steve McQueen, was based largely on Sage’s experiences as a POW. In 1985 the retired Colonel Sage penned his autobiography, titled _Sage: “Dagger” of the O.S.S._ McQueen’s characters does things ascribed to other people in the book – someone was “Cooler King”, someone “moled out” with Piglet, Someone distilled the Rasin Hooch 9not potato liquor, as in the movie) into spirits. But they were different guys. Several of the characters in the film were completely or mostly based onn a real-life counterpart, but McQueen’s character isn’t, really. It’s a Frankenstein made up of bits of several real-life people, and the personality of none of them. If people want to claim their local hero was the basis for McQueen’s part, they can do so, but I’m not required to agree. ---
**Author:** ![msmith537](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d9b06d/32.png) [@msmith537](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/msmith537)\ **Post date:** [April 23, 2013, 9:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/military-folks-what-are-the-best-hilariously-inaccurate-military-movies-scenes/655860/120 "2013-04-23T21:50:29Z")
Not really military, but when did it become accepted fact that espionage agents and intelligence operatives were either: A) a suave guy in a tuxedo, driving an Aston Martin, using his actual name wherever he goes whose plan is generally no more complex than show up at some fancy party and antagonize the local terrorist or drug lord into capturing him and ranting about his plans by sleeping with his girlfriend. B) good looking, smart, idealistic, reluctant, one man wrecking machine, sometimes suffering from that rare form of amnesia that causes you to forget your name and personal history, but leaves your Krav Maga and tactical weapons training intact. C) Pretty much the hottest woman you will ever see but who is able to slip in and out of any location undetected by putting on a wig. Because I’m pretty sure working at the CIA or MI6 is absolutely nothing like any of that. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/military-folks-what-are-the-best-hilariously-inaccurate-military-movies-scenes/655860.md?page=5) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/military-folks-what-are-the-best-hilariously-inaccurate-military-movies-scenes/655860.md?page=7)