# Mini-flames: Let's you and him fight with knives. **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [September 2, 2008, 11:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mini-flames-lets-you-and-him-fight-with-knives/461771 "2008-09-02T23:56:59Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Ensign\_Edison](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7ab992/32.png) [@Ensign\_Edison](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ensign_Edison)\ **Post date:** [September 2, 2008, 11:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mini-flames-lets-you-and-him-fight-with-knives/461771/1 "2008-09-02T23:56:59Z")
This thread is like mini-rants, but specifically Dope related only. I shall start us off. \*\*What Exit? \*\* – Don’t be so damn benign! Don’t you ever get ugly, man? I know, you know, we all know your app for mod has been in for years, but jesus, where’s your demons? **FriarTed** – Do you realize you come off like a horny ex-fratboy half the time? Reading half your posts feels like being repeatedly jabbed in the side with the elbow of an alcoholic uncle. I hit submit too soon, so that’s it for now. ---
**Author:** ![ivan\_astikov](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/58f4c7/32.png) [@ivan\_astikov](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ivan_astikov)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2008, 1:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mini-flames-lets-you-and-him-fight-with-knives/461771/2 "2008-09-03T13:55:41Z")
\< flexes muscles, then casually picks thumb-nail with knife tip \> Hey, I’m bored. I’ll accomodate anyone who wants a piece of me. ---
**Author:** ![Mellivora\_capensis](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/8797f3/32.png) [@Mellivora\_capensis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mellivora_capensis)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2008, 2:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mini-flames-lets-you-and-him-fight-with-knives/461771/3 "2008-09-03T14:22:42Z")
> [@ivan\_astikov](#): > > \< flexes muscles, then casually picks thumb-nail with knife tip \> > > Hey, I’m bored. I’ll **accomodate** anyone who wants a piece of me. \< adjusts microscope, picks up scalpel, selects and bolds \> ---
**Author:** ![ivan\_astikov](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/58f4c7/32.png) [@ivan\_astikov](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ivan_astikov)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2008, 2:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mini-flames-lets-you-and-him-fight-with-knives/461771/4 "2008-09-03T14:28:16Z")
> [@Mellivora\_capensis](#): > > \< adjusts microscope, picks up scalpel, selects and bolds \> (I knew that’d suck someone in…and hey, they’ve only brought a scalpel!) You’re going to need to get up close and dirty with that, my Latin-named foe. Come on, bust a move. ---
**Author:** ![Mellivora\_capensis](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/8797f3/32.png) [@Mellivora\_capensis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mellivora_capensis)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2008, 2:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mini-flames-lets-you-and-him-fight-with-knives/461771/5 "2008-09-03T14:35:25Z")
> [@ivan\_astikov](#): > > (I knew that’d suck someone in…and hey, they’ve only brought a scalpel!) > > You’re going to need to get up close and dirty with that, my Latin-named foe. Come on, bust a move. \< turns around, raises tail \> ---
**Author:** ![neutron\_star](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/51bf81/32.png) [@neutron\_star](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/neutron_star)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2008, 2:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mini-flames-lets-you-and-him-fight-with-knives/461771/6 "2008-09-03T14:39:37Z")
Psst, hey **ivan**! You’re [fucked](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Honey_Badger), dude! ---
**Author:** ![Cluricaun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/bb73d2/32.png) [@Cluricaun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cluricaun)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2008, 2:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mini-flames-lets-you-and-him-fight-with-knives/461771/7 "2008-09-03T14:41:36Z")
Honey Badgers can use scalpels now? That’s pretty scary right there. ---
**Author:** ![nd\_n8](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/439d5e/32.png) [@nd\_n8](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nd_n8)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2008, 2:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mini-flames-lets-you-and-him-fight-with-knives/461771/8 "2008-09-03T14:47:40Z")
> [@neutron\_star](#): > > Psst, hey **ivan**! You’re [fucked](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Honey_Badger), dude! My favorite part of neutron star’s link: > [@](#): > > In one case, shown on a television program on Animal Planet, an old female honey badger that was nearly toothless and blind in one eye was attacked by a leopard. It took the leopard approximately one hour to kill the honey badger. Leave it to a russkie to bring a knife to a badger fight. ---
**Author:** ![ivan\_astikov](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/58f4c7/32.png) [@ivan\_astikov](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ivan_astikov)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2008, 2:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mini-flames-lets-you-and-him-fight-with-knives/461771/9 "2008-09-03T14:49:10Z")
Cheers for the ‘heads up’. Damn these UK gun laws. > [@Mellivora\_capensis](#): > > \< turns around, raises tail \> I hope that’s a sign of submission, and you’re not gonna spray me with anything? This shirt’s clean on, and if I get any skunk musk on it, there’ll be hell to pay. ---
**Author:** ![What\_Exit](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/what_exit/32/10652_2.png) [@What\_Exit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/What_Exit)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2008, 3:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mini-flames-lets-you-and-him-fight-with-knives/461771/10 "2008-09-03T15:47:42Z")
> [@Ensign\_Edison](#): > > \*\*What Exit? \*\* – Don’t be so damn benign! Don’t you ever get ugly, man? I know, you know, we all know your app for mod has been in for years, but jesus, where’s your demons? Strange thing to be pitted for but I do occasionally get angry. I went off on \*\*levdrakon \*\*recently. Of course I later apologized. I know every once in a while I post in actual ugly anger, but you are correct it is rare. I am sorry, but I have no complaints about you. Was I suppose to? 😉 Oh, for clarification, I did volunteer and fill out the form to be a mod. I doubt it will happen, but I thought I would be a good mod for the Sports forum which ended up the Game Room and possibly elsewhere. If they need me at some point, the offer is still open. Jim (I also pissed off \*\*Ivan \*\*over the lost weekend, but I never got ugly) ---
**Author:** ![ivan\_astikov](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/58f4c7/32.png) [@ivan\_astikov](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ivan_astikov)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2008, 3:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mini-flames-lets-you-and-him-fight-with-knives/461771/11 "2008-09-03T15:53:25Z")
> [@What\_Exit](#): > > (I also pissed off \*\*Ivan \*\*over the lost weekend, but I never got ugly) No need to whisper, I’ve forgiven you now. Now move aside while I sort this skunk thing out. ---
**Author:** ![Mellivora\_capensis](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/8797f3/32.png) [@Mellivora\_capensis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mellivora_capensis)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2008, 4:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mini-flames-lets-you-and-him-fight-with-knives/461771/12 "2008-09-03T16:22:50Z")
> [@ivan\_astikov](#): > > … > I hope that’s a sign of submission, and you’re not gonna spray me with anything? This shirt’s clean on, and if I get any skunk musk on it, there’ll be hell to pay. Submission? Not likely 😃 On a more serious note though, and at the risk of denting the ratel’s fearsome image, from **neutron’s** link, this is kinda odd: > [@](#): > > If bitten by a puff adder, one of the honey badger’s preferred venomous snakes, it will become paralyzed for several hours. Once its paralysis has subsided, the honey badger will continue with its meal or resume its journey. As far as I know puffies are cytotoxic. Cytotoxin causes painful progressive swelling syndrome and necrosis. Unless the badger has an inherent antibody against cytotoxin, I can’t imagine why it would get paralyzed. Paralysis is caused by neurotoxins, such as those carried by black mambas. Hmmm, I might have to query this with Wiki… ---
**Author:** ![ivan\_astikov](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/58f4c7/32.png) [@ivan\_astikov](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ivan_astikov)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2008, 4:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mini-flames-lets-you-and-him-fight-with-knives/461771/13 "2008-09-03T16:50:59Z")
- thinks \* Hey, I could coat my knife with some of that stuff. psst…anyone got a spare puff-adder? ---
**Author:** ![SmartAleq](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/smartaleq/32/163_2.png) [@SmartAleq](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SmartAleq)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2008, 5:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mini-flames-lets-you-and-him-fight-with-knives/461771/14 "2008-09-03T17:36:31Z")
Yeah, sure homie, work out… _tosses live pissed off puff adder at **ivan** _ Sure hope your catching skills are all that–or that you remembered to put on your asbestos welding gauntlets! ---
**Author:** ![ivan\_astikov](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/58f4c7/32.png) [@ivan\_astikov](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ivan_astikov)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2008, 6:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mini-flames-lets-you-and-him-fight-with-knives/461771/15 "2008-09-03T18:47:12Z")
> [@SmartAleq](#): > > Yeah, sure homie, work out… > > _tosses live pissed off puff adder at **ivan** _ > > Sure hope your catching skills are all that–or that you remembered to put on your asbestos welding gauntlets! - Chops it into 10 pieces in mid-air. Picks up slightly shocked adder’s head \* Thanks bud, I only needed the poison bit. ---
**Author:** ![Half\_Man\_Half\_Wit](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/half_man_half_wit/32/21766_2.png) [@Half\_Man\_Half\_Wit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Half_Man_Half_Wit)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2008, 6:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mini-flames-lets-you-and-him-fight-with-knives/461771/16 "2008-09-03T18:48:18Z")
Oh no, this isn’t gonna turn out to be a _outdoes everybody else in asterisks and in my imagination_-type of thread, is it? If so, _kills everybody_. ---
**Author:** ![What\_Exit](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/what_exit/32/10652_2.png) [@What\_Exit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/What_Exit)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2008, 6:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mini-flames-lets-you-and-him-fight-with-knives/461771/17 "2008-09-03T18:49:22Z")
> [@Half\_Man\_Half\_Wit](#): > > Oh no, this isn’t gonna turn out to be a _outdoes everybody else in asterisks and in my imagination_-type of thread, is it? If so, _kills everybody_. I hope not, that is what the game room would be for. ---
**Author:** ![Omegaman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/e480ec/32.png) [@Omegaman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Omegaman)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2008, 11:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mini-flames-lets-you-and-him-fight-with-knives/461771/18 "2008-09-03T23:53:59Z")
> [@Half\_Man\_Half\_Wit](#): > > Oh no, this isn’t gonna turn out to be a _outdoes everybody else in asterisks and in my imagination_-type of thread, is it? If so, _kills everybody_. Screw that. A nice shank is the way to fly. Whites of their eyes, and all that shit. ---
**Author:** ![Autolycus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/22d042/32.png) [@Autolycus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Autolycus)\ **Post date:** [September 4, 2008, 2:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mini-flames-lets-you-and-him-fight-with-knives/461771/19 "2008-09-04T02:21:37Z")
Great, now everybody is too cowardly again to actually air out their grievances. ---
**Author:** ![Sleeps\_With\_Butterflies](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bb73d2/32.png) [@Sleeps\_With\_Butterflies](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sleeps_With_Butterflies)\ **Post date:** [September 4, 2008, 5:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mini-flames-lets-you-and-him-fight-with-knives/461771/20 "2008-09-04T05:08:15Z")
> [@Autolycus](#): > > Great, now everybody is too cowardly again to actually air out their grievances. Kiss my ass, **Autolycus**!!! KISS IT. how was that? [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mini-flames-lets-you-and-him-fight-with-knives/461771.md?page=2)