# Mini-post. The Six Million Dollar Man

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mini-post-the-six-million-dollar-man/996529>\
**Category:** Cafe Society\
**Tags:** tv-shows-scripted\
**Created:** [January 23, 2024, 6:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mini-post-the-six-million-dollar-man/996529 "2024-01-23T06:59:18Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 20\
**Page:** 3

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**Author:** ![Horatius](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/horatius/32/3572_2.png) [@Horatius](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Horatius)\
**Post date:** [January 23, 2024, 4:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mini-post-the-six-million-dollar-man/996529/41 "2024-01-23T16:34:40Z")

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> [@Elmer\_J.Fudd](#):
>
> Oscar: "You heard me! Off with them both! And while you’re at it, pluck out an eye…”

The pretty much happens in the Original Robocop.

“We managed to save the left arm.”

“I thought the idea was total body prosthetics. Lose the arm.”

“But…”

“What do you think, Bob?”

“He signed the release forms when he joined the force, he’s legally dead, I think we can do whatever we want with him.”

“Great. Lose the arm.”

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**Author:** ![Pavelb1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/439d5e/32.png) [@Pavelb1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pavelb1)\
**Post date:** [January 23, 2024, 4:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mini-post-the-six-million-dollar-man/996529/42 "2024-01-23T16:46:16Z")

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If they got the Westworld people to give it a shot and the right cast it could work wonders. No clue who I would cast though. Everyone I can think of are too old.

I think there would be an audience for it

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**Author:** ![Pavelb1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/439d5e/32.png) [@Pavelb1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pavelb1)\
**Post date:** [January 23, 2024, 5:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mini-post-the-six-million-dollar-man/996529/43 "2024-01-23T17:04:40Z")

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Some observations

I don’t know if “bad” is the right term. “Oddly paced”. Lots of filler to get to that one hour mark or they will linger on a shot just a few seconds too long.

“See Steve and his cosmonaut friend pick their way through a rubble-filled corridor!”

But Majors is so damn affable. And Steve’s friendship with Oscar Goldman is very cool.

Last ep I just watched midway through season one had Steve team-up with the above Cosmonaut to rescue the Cosmonauts fiancé and deactivate a nuclear weapon on a Soviet island. I kept waiting for the tension to be a betrayal by The Rooskie high command but …nope. In fact Steve mentions to his friend that the Russians arnt going to let a famous American astronaut die on their island.

Their was little tension from the Soviet’s towards the Americans and none from the American military towards the Soviets. A weird optimistic tone of detente for a 1974 show.

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**Author:** ![Intergalactic\_Gladiator](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/intergalactic_gladiator/32/112_2.png) [@Intergalactic\_Gladiator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Intergalactic_Gladiator)\
**Post date:** [January 23, 2024, 6:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mini-post-the-six-million-dollar-man/996529/44 "2024-01-23T18:07:26Z")

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> [@GuanoLad](#):
>
> - bionics are no longer science fiction
> - super speed and super strength is just superhero stuff, and we’ve seen it all before
> - they tried to remake The Bionic Woman already and really muffed it
> - I don’t think there’s an audience for it

I think another thing is that the OSI, despite being a secret intelligence operation, was an altruistic group with America’s best interest at its core. There were spies and other bad guys who might infiltrate them but the organization itself was always the good guy. I don’t think that’s done too much anymore, which is unfortunate because I know you can mine drama and storylines from government conspiracies (wasn’t that a big part of the Bionic Woman remake?) but I think that would hamper what the OSI would try to accomplish. I’d love to see a remake of 6MDM in an episodic format that works towards a big finish at the end of the season.

One thing I always wondered about Six Million Dollar Man was if they remade him today. Would he be better because of an increase in technology and a standardization of parts or would he be worse because 6 million dollars doesn’t get you as far as it did in the 1970s?

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**Author:** ![Pork\_Rind](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pork_rind/32/111_2.png) [@Pork\_Rind](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pork_Rind)\
**Post date:** [January 23, 2024, 6:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mini-post-the-six-million-dollar-man/996529/45 "2024-01-23T18:11:03Z")

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> [@Intergalactic\_Gladiator](#):
>
> Would he be better because of an increase in technology and a standardization of parts or would he be worse because 6 million dollars doesn’t get you as far as it did in the 1970s?

Yeah. Six million bucks today is like an appendectomy with complications, I think. Not a great action story.

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**Author:** ![furryman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/furryman/32/99_2.png) [@furryman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/furryman)\
**Post date:** [January 23, 2024, 6:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mini-post-the-six-million-dollar-man/996529/46 "2024-01-23T18:24:12Z")

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My joke is if they rebooted _The Six Million Dollar Man_ today they’d have to call it The Six Billion Dollar Man.

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**Author:** ![InternetLegend](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/internetlegend/32/13154_2.png) [@InternetLegend](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/InternetLegend)\
**Post date:** [January 23, 2024, 6:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mini-post-the-six-million-dollar-man/996529/47 "2024-01-23T18:28:03Z")

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> [@Peter\_Morris](#):
>
> “Steve Austin, a man barely alive. We can rebuild him. We can make him better than he was before. Better, stronger, faster. We have the technology to make the World’s first bionic man.”

Every time I hear that, I remember a quote from a Mad Magazine satire (spoken by a nurse): “Sometimes faster _isnt_ better!”

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**Author:** ![Horatius](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/horatius/32/3572_2.png) [@Horatius](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Horatius)\
**Post date:** [January 23, 2024, 6:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mini-post-the-six-million-dollar-man/996529/48 "2024-01-23T18:45:11Z")

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> [@Pavelb1](#):
>
> I don’t know if “bad” is the right term. “Oddly paced”. Lots of filler to get to that one hour mark or they will linger on a shot just a few seconds too long.

I bought the DVDs last year, and watched the first few TV movies, which I don’t think I ever saw before, and yeah, the pacing was really weird. There was one point where he’s in a hotel bar on the mission, and they cut to watching a guitar player just playing for a few minutes. And it didn’t turn out that the guitar player was a spy, or anything like that, it was just, “Hey, Guitar Interlude!”

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**Author:** ![Odesio](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/odesio/32/20003_2.png) [@Odesio](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Odesio)\
**Post date:** [January 23, 2024, 7:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mini-post-the-six-million-dollar-man/996529/49 "2024-01-23T19:02:56Z")

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> [@RitterSport](#):
>
> Was $6 million a lot for a defense contract back then? It seems comically low now, like you couldn’t get Lockheed to redo your kitchen for less than $10 million.

Adjusted for inflation, that’s $43,000,000 in today’s money. That’s a lot of money to spend on one person.

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**Author:** ![Pavelb1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/439d5e/32.png) [@Pavelb1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pavelb1)\
**Post date:** [January 23, 2024, 7:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mini-post-the-six-million-dollar-man/996529/50 "2024-01-23T19:15:42Z")

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At least with Steve….he’s a \*\*\*\*ing astronaut. With all the physical and mental stamina and patriotic makeup to reasonably think they might get a top class asset in return

Jaime?? “Please spend six million on my girlfriend??!!! She’s a really good tennis player.”

Haven’t seen the ep in question in forever but I assume Steve really played his You Owe me cards.

And now that I think about it……a partial parachute disaster (Jamie’s accident) where you lose your legs, an arm and hearing in one ear but your internal organs are fine?

And now that I think about it X2:

That’s some serious moral shithoussery to give a guy his limbs back and THEN say “Well…I mean…we can remove them if you want to spend the rest of your life with one limb”

I don’t think I’m either case the addition of bionics saved their lives.

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**Author:** ![Southern\_Yankee](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/southern_yankee/32/2800_2.png) [@Southern\_Yankee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Southern_Yankee)\
**Post date:** [January 23, 2024, 7:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mini-post-the-six-million-dollar-man/996529/51 "2024-01-23T19:21:48Z")

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Oh… but… Jaime moving her hair out of the way to use her bionic hearing … I’d pay.

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**Author:** ![Jasmine](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jasmine/32/2964_2.png) [@Jasmine](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jasmine)\
**Post date:** [January 23, 2024, 7:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mini-post-the-six-million-dollar-man/996529/52 "2024-01-23T19:24:01Z")

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So would the “6 Million Dollar Man” be the “6 Billion Dollar Man” in today’s economy, or would he cost even more?

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**Author:** ![Just\_Asking\_Questions](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ba9def/32.png) [@Just\_Asking\_Questions](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Just_Asking_Questions)\
**Post date:** [January 23, 2024, 7:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mini-post-the-six-million-dollar-man/996529/53 "2024-01-23T19:28:49Z")

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Don’t forget the SEVEN million dollar man, Monte Markham, who went berserk with power. IIRC, he got to keep his bionics, but set at “normal” power. He could still be alive today, sitting in a nursing home with arms and legs that look as youthful as they ever did. “You whippersnappers, why, in my day I could snap you in two, throw you out through a wall!” Sure, old man, have some pudding.

But you can forget the bionic dog. I have.

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**Author:** ![MrAtoz](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@MrAtoz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MrAtoz)\
**Post date:** [January 23, 2024, 7:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mini-post-the-six-million-dollar-man/996529/54 "2024-01-23T19:31:58Z")

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> [@Just\_Asking\_Questions](#):
>
> Don’t forget the SEVEN million dollar man, Monte Markham, who went berserk with power.

As I recall, _both_ of his arms were bionic. As I further recall, his character name was “Barney Miller,” so I was greatly disappointed that he was not played by Hal Linden.

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**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\
**Post date:** [January 23, 2024, 7:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mini-post-the-six-million-dollar-man/996529/55 "2024-01-23T19:56:34Z")

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Oh, man. I thought this was a new show. Mini bionic man. A tiny widdle Stevie.

I was totally into it.

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**Author:** ![InternetLegend](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/internetlegend/32/13154_2.png) [@InternetLegend](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/InternetLegend)\
**Post date:** [January 23, 2024, 8:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mini-post-the-six-million-dollar-man/996529/56 "2024-01-23T20:05:28Z")

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**That** , I’d watch.

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**Author:** ![Slow\_Moving\_Vehicle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/slow_moving_vehicle/32/291_2.png) [@Slow\_Moving\_Vehicle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Slow_Moving_Vehicle)\
**Post date:** [January 23, 2024, 8:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mini-post-the-six-million-dollar-man/996529/57 "2024-01-23T20:29:02Z")

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In addition to the Steve Austin action figure, I also had the Oscar Goldman figure. That one came with a cool trick briefcase. Twist the handle in the correct direction, it would open to a cardboard inlay of a neatly-organized briefcase. Twist it the wrong way, and (imaginary) _boom!_ - it blew up. Which is to say, opened to a carboard inlay of an explosion and disarray.

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**Author:** ![Johnny\_Q](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/898d66/32.png) [@Johnny\_Q](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_Q)\
**Post date:** [January 23, 2024, 8:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mini-post-the-six-million-dollar-man/996529/58 "2024-01-23T20:36:17Z")

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Imagine Steve coming to in the hospital after the operation…  
What’s the first thing he grabs with his new arm?  
Back in surgery… Something _else_ is now bionic,  
Cue the porno version…

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**Author:** ![Pavelb1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/439d5e/32.png) [@Pavelb1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pavelb1)\
**Post date:** [January 24, 2024, 1:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mini-post-the-six-million-dollar-man/996529/59 "2024-01-24T01:01:55Z")

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The Bisexualonic Woman.

She was replaced from the hips down.

…thats all I got…works in a 70’s way though.

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**Author:** ![Johnny\_Q](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/898d66/32.png) [@Johnny\_Q](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_Q)\
**Post date:** [January 24, 2024, 1:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mini-post-the-six-million-dollar-man/996529/60 "2024-01-24T01:21:35Z")

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When they say she’s “pneumatic” they mean it literally!

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