# Mini-rants about members of the opposite sex **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [July 2, 2010, 7:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mini-rants-about-members-of-the-opposite-sex/545334 "2010-07-02T19:18:19Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![descamisado](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e480ec/32.png) [@descamisado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/descamisado)\ **Post date:** [July 2, 2010, 8:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mini-rants-about-members-of-the-opposite-sex/545334/21 "2010-07-02T20:50:38Z")
> [@tdn](#): > > Me too. The wondering part, that is, not the smelling part. > > Do the various scents have to fit together, much in the same way that certain foods go together well? Are White Diamonds and lavendar the olfactory equivelent of vanilla ice cream and ketchup? I guess I’m a simple scents kind of guy. I wear unscented deodorant and I don’t even wear cologne. The only scent I occasionally wear is Caswell Massey’s Tricorn Talcum Powder sprinkled underarm and in my underwear. To me, if I’m smelling Arpège or something, and sense strong and less refined scents competing with it, I’m less likely to want take in all that fragrant wonderfulness than to wonder if she has to hazed back into womanhood every morning by running a gauntlet where buckets of disparate odors are thrown at her. But that’s just me. 😛 ---
**Author:** ![TXCowboy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/76d3ee/32.png) [@TXCowboy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TXCowboy)\ **Post date:** [July 2, 2010, 8:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mini-rants-about-members-of-the-opposite-sex/545334/22 "2010-07-02T20:51:37Z")
[quote=“CalMeacham, post:12, topic:545334”] This might only be specific to my wife (and I shudder to think what she might rant in reply, beginning with the snoring), /QUOTE] Oh yes, this is another thing… I Do Not have a snoring problem… I snore … YOU have the problem with it, so you move to the couch or guest room not me. I am quite comfortable right here in my bed. ---
**Author:** ![Euphonious\_Polemic](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/euphonious_polemic/32/3002_2.png) [@Euphonious\_Polemic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Euphonious_Polemic)\ **Post date:** [July 2, 2010, 9:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mini-rants-about-members-of-the-opposite-sex/545334/23 "2010-07-02T21:06:54Z")
Women: If you notice that your male partner inexplicably turns into an inconsiderate asshole every 28 days or so, could you please consider the possibility that perhaps he is not entirely to blame? Also, those women in their late '40s or early '50’s, please realize that when you can go from crying to raging to happy to pouting to depressed and back to angry within the space of 15 minutes, that tends to make your partner a tad confused. ---
**Author:** ![Spice\_Weasel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spice_weasel/32/5435_2.png) [@Spice\_Weasel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spice_Weasel)\ **Post date:** [July 2, 2010, 9:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mini-rants-about-members-of-the-opposite-sex/545334/24 "2010-07-02T21:10:15Z")
> [@zoid](#): > > 1. If you say "I don’t care” we will believe you mean “I don’t care - pick whatever style of screwdrivers/table-saw/whatever you want - I have no emotional investment in it.” > We will NOT interpret it as "I cannot believe you didn’t care about the drapes! How do YOU like it?! You should be getting upset - why AREN’T you UPSET?!” Haha! Busted. ☹ ---
**Author:** ![mhendo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mhendo/32/3159_2.png) [@mhendo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mhendo)\ **Post date:** [July 2, 2010, 9:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mini-rants-about-members-of-the-opposite-sex/545334/25 "2010-07-02T21:45:52Z")
> [@VinylTurnip](#): > > I’m truly sorry that in your dream, I was having sex with your sister. Being that I’ve done so neither in real life nor in my own dreams, it hardly seems fair that you be pissed at me all morning. I’ve heard of this sort of behavior before. It strikes me as pathological. ---
**Author:** ![AClockworkMelon](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aclockworkmelon/32/10803_2.png) [@AClockworkMelon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AClockworkMelon)\ **Post date:** [July 2, 2010, 9:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mini-rants-about-members-of-the-opposite-sex/545334/26 "2010-07-02T21:55:23Z")
Women drive like this and men drive like that! Ha ha. ---
**Author:** ![Lynn\_Bodoni](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e47c2d/32.png) [@Lynn\_Bodoni](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lynn_Bodoni)\ **Post date:** [July 2, 2010, 10:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mini-rants-about-members-of-the-opposite-sex/545334/27 "2010-07-02T22:00:06Z")
> [@VinylTurnip](#): > > I’m truly sorry that in your dream, I was having sex with your sister. Being that I’ve done so neither in real life nor in my own dreams, it hardly seems fair that you be pissed at me all morning. I’ve had dreams where my husband was doing something offensive. When I wake up, I am INCREDIBLY pissed off at Bill, although he doesn’t deserve it. However, I tell him that I had a dream about him doing whatever, and he sort of chuckles, and then I say that I’m gonna go kill orcs and goblins until I get it out of my system, and then he seems to relax a bit. The thing is, if I’m pissed at someone, I’m going to stay pissed for a while, even if it’s completely unfair. The best I can manage to do is to give him fair warning, and then try to work it out of my system (usually by playing some sort of computer game). If he’s actually done something to deserve my anger, though… ---
**Author:** ![AHunter3](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ahunter3/32/368_2.png) [@AHunter3](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AHunter3)\ **Post date:** [July 2, 2010, 10:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mini-rants-about-members-of-the-opposite-sex/545334/28 "2010-07-02T22:29:06Z")
Dear Female Folk: “Let’s Assume We’re Equals”, and its close cousin “Let’s NOT Assume We’re Different in Various Kinds of Widely-Known Already-Established Ways”, are not optional relationshiip modalities that you and you alone get to invoke, embracing them in feminist self-affirmation then suspending them at other times in feminine traditionalism. Let’s just ratify that as a fundamental axiom and establish that it ALWAYS applies, and I get to insist on it as readily as you do, and then move on from there, OK? ---
**Author:** ![Carol\_the\_Impaler](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Carol\_the\_Impaler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Carol_the_Impaler)\ **Post date:** [July 2, 2010, 10:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mini-rants-about-members-of-the-opposite-sex/545334/29 "2010-07-02T22:36:12Z")
> [@tdn](#): > > I don’t see any of these as gender issues. > > But these: > > Women: It’s your ass. There are men in the house. Check before sitting. And no, touching the seat is not grosser then falling in. > > Men: Just put the damn seat down already. If you don;t have enough energy to do that, maybe you should see a doctor. Ha! I was once at a play in a gay theatre with my two gay friends. At the intermission of course there was a long line of almost entirely men and me, a chick, waiting for the bathroom. I was a big hit when I did my thing and came back to tell my friends I had dutifully put the seat back _up._ ---
**Author:** ![Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e8c25b/32.png) [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Really_Not_All_That_Bright)\ **Post date:** [July 2, 2010, 11:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mini-rants-about-members-of-the-opposite-sex/545334/30 "2010-07-02T23:01:18Z")
> [@AHunter3](#): > > “Let’s Assume We’re Equals”, and its close cousin “Let’s NOT Assume We’re Different in Various Kinds of Widely-Known Already-Established Ways”, are not optional relationshiip modalities that you and you alone get to invoke, embracing them in feminist self-affirmation then suspending them at other times in feminine traditionalism. Oh, fuck, THIS. “I am a 21st-century woman, and I don’t need _you_ to behave like my father.” “You’re the man! You _should_ be driving everywhere!” ETA: I love you, honey. But I mean, _honestly_. ---
**Author:** ![descamisado](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e480ec/32.png) [@descamisado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/descamisado)\ **Post date:** [July 2, 2010, 11:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mini-rants-about-members-of-the-opposite-sex/545334/31 "2010-07-02T23:09:44Z")
Eeeeeeeeeeeekkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk!!! Come kill this spider! Fuck that, I’m scared of them too, you kill it. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Devil\_s\_Grandmother](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/74df32/32.png) [@The\_Devil\_s\_Grandmother](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Devil_s_Grandmother)\ **Post date:** [July 2, 2010, 11:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mini-rants-about-members-of-the-opposite-sex/545334/32 "2010-07-02T23:11:17Z")
> [@zoid](#): > > 1. when a man says “I don’t care” it means “I don’t care - pick whatever style of silverware/tablecloth/whatever you want - I have no emotional investment in it.” I’m fine with this, as long as you(1) don’t then veto everything I like, especially when it comes to choosing dinner. Once you’ve said “I don’t care” or “you choose” and I say “Ok, _ethnicity_salad_steak_whatever\*” your next words had better fucking well be “Ok, I’ll drive”.(2) (1) you = every man I’ve dated, a set that probably does not include the poster known as **zoid** , (2) Or “ok, you drive”. Sorry, **Really Not All That Bright** , I was typing my example and missed your post). ---
**Author:** ![kidneyfailure](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/9f8e36/32.png) [@kidneyfailure](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kidneyfailure)\ **Post date:** [July 2, 2010, 11:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mini-rants-about-members-of-the-opposite-sex/545334/33 "2010-07-02T23:12:36Z")
Women: If you want to go out to buy that green sweater you saw last week then go directly to the store in question, buy the thing you want, then go home. Do NOT drag us around to ten different stores looking at different shit for two hours before you eventually make your way to the store that has the item you came out for. That is just annoying. Do NOT say, “tell me honestly how this (item of clothing) makes me look,” and then get angry when we answer honestly. If we say that it makes you look like a filthy slut well, ok, fine, get angry about that. But if it’s some totally innocent type of, “Eh, I think it’s kind of ugly,” then you have no right to get angry. And another thing: just choose an outfit and stop wasting time. Who cares if it clashes/doesn’t match/looks old/makes your ass look big? Believe it or not, not everyone is going to be looking at you, and very few people besides yourself are going to give a shit about what you’re wearing. And, BTW, maybe your ass _does_ look fat. If you don’t want to hear me say so then don’t ask me if it does. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [July 2, 2010, 11:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mini-rants-about-members-of-the-opposite-sex/545334/34 "2010-07-02T23:17:03Z")
> [@zoid](#): > > Ladies: > > 1. when a man says “I don’t care” it means “I don’t care - pick whatever style of silverware/tablecloth/whatever you want - I have no emotional investment in it.” \ I’ve learned this lesson and it really has made my life better. Jim is a full-grown adult; when he says he doesn’t care, I take that to mean he doesn’t care and move on from there. He is fully capable of expressing an opinion if he does care. ---
**Author:** ![ThirdOne](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/53a042/32.png) [@ThirdOne](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ThirdOne)\ **Post date:** [July 2, 2010, 11:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mini-rants-about-members-of-the-opposite-sex/545334/35 "2010-07-02T23:23:29Z")
descamisado, having had a fucking spider the size of a quarter (plus its legs) in my towel on my hair, I’m extremely afraid of spiders, now too! However, there is a nifty device for picking them up so one can take them outside and drop them. Search for spider catcher and you will find it. I have used it on more than one occasion! Men, please, for the love of pete, do not douse yourself with aftershave and then throw cologne on. I am extremely sensitive to scents and good grief, I don’t want to smell you from five feet away. Ditto the “I don’t care” then you better be happy with food we are having 😃 ---
**Author:** ![kidneyfailure](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/9f8e36/32.png) [@kidneyfailure](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kidneyfailure)\ **Post date:** [July 2, 2010, 11:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mini-rants-about-members-of-the-opposite-sex/545334/36 "2010-07-02T23:52:01Z")
> [@ThirdOne](#): > > descamisado, having had a fucking spider the size of a quarter (plus its legs) in my towel on my hair, I’m extremely afraid of spiders, now too! See, I don’t get this. What’s there to be afraid of with spiders? What are they going to do, kill you? Probably not. I’ve never understood the fear of spiders. Snakes? Ok. Spiders? Nah. ---
**Author:** ![Lynn\_Bodoni](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e47c2d/32.png) [@Lynn\_Bodoni](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lynn_Bodoni)\ **Post date:** [July 3, 2010, 12:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mini-rants-about-members-of-the-opposite-sex/545334/37 "2010-07-03T00:57:51Z")
> [@](#): > > If you want to go out to buy that green sweater you saw last week then go directly to the store in question, buy the thing you want, then go home. Do NOT drag us around to ten different stores looking at different shit for two hours before you eventually make your way to the store that has the item you came out for. That is just annoying. How the hell else are we supposed to know if there’s not a better sweater out there? Women’s clothes comes in a truly dazzling array of cuts and styles, and we won’t know if one will make us look better than another until we’ve tried them all on. However, I confess that I hate clothes shopping so much that if something fits and meets my requirements, I am liable to buy the damn thing just to get out of the store. I don’t want to try on a dozen garments. I might take a dozen garments into the dressing room, but if I try on the top and it looks horrid, I’m not going to try on the bottoms that I chose to go with it. And yes, I was like this even when I weighed 115 pounds in my teens. As for driving, my husband says that my driving makes him nervous, and he hates for me to drive. Even on long road trips, he’d rather fall asleep at the wheel rather than let me drive. We haven’t taken road trips together for years. ---
**Author:** ![Nothar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/ce73a5/32.png) [@Nothar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nothar)\ **Post date:** [July 3, 2010, 1:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mini-rants-about-members-of-the-opposite-sex/545334/38 "2010-07-03T01:12:41Z")
Women: If you find yourself having to constantly repeat yourself when talking to your man when he is watching TV, reading a book, staring into space, etc., it is not because he does not care or because he is conciously ignoring you, it is because you talk…all…the…time and men seriously do not realize you said anything because your voice sounds the exact same as background noise to him. Once you say “are you listening to me?” in a slightly louder voice the man then has to access a previously shut down area of his brain to realize that you were actually talking to him. This is not the man’s fault. He has sub-conciously developed this mechanism to block out your voice as a survival technique. ---
**Author:** ![pope\_hentai](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ee59a6/32.png) [@pope\_hentai](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pope_hentai)\ **Post date:** [July 3, 2010, 1:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mini-rants-about-members-of-the-opposite-sex/545334/39 "2010-07-03T01:29:34Z")
> [@kidneyfailure](#): > > See, I don’t get this. What’s there to be afraid of with spiders? What are they going to do, kill you? Probably not. I’ve never understood the fear of spiders. Snakes? Ok. Spiders? Nah. i never really understood it until i moved to tennessee… when i lived in michigan it dodnt matter… but here a brown recluse bite can happen before you notice, and in a few days can leave one helluva permanent mark if not taken care of. ☹ ---
**Author:** ![Southern\_Yankee](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/southern_yankee/32/2800_2.png) [@Southern\_Yankee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Southern_Yankee)\ **Post date:** [July 3, 2010, 1:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mini-rants-about-members-of-the-opposite-sex/545334/40 "2010-07-03T01:37:19Z")
> [@Nothar](#): > > Women: If you find yourself having to constantly repeat yourself when talking to your man when he is watching TV, reading a book, staring into space, etc., it is not because he does not care or because he is conciously ignoring you, it is because you talk…all…the…time and men seriously do not realize you said anything because your voice sounds the exact same as background noise to him. Once you say “are you listening to me?” in a slightly louder voice the man then has to access a previously shut down area of his brain to realize that you were actually talking to him. This is not the man’s fault. He has sub-conciously developed this mechanism to block out your voice as a survival technique. \ [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mini-rants-about-members-of-the-opposite-sex/545334.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mini-rants-about-members-of-the-opposite-sex/545334.md?page=3)