# Miscarried fetus names. Reuse? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [August 20, 2012, 5:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/miscarried-fetus-names-reuse/632071 "2012-08-20T17:26:34Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 13\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![astro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/9dc877/32.png) [@astro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/astro)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2012, 5:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/miscarried-fetus-names-reuse/632071/41 "2012-08-23T05:17:42Z")
> [@MostlyClueless](#): > > If you do, never, ever ever, EVER tell the kid. I really don’t think it’s that big a deal. My parents reused the name for the baby stillborn before me. They told me about the re-use when I was in grade school. It has no negative emotional impact on me whatsoever. It’s a name they liked (my maternal grandfather’s name) so I got it. Why in the world would any one be throwing a fuss about this? It may be an issue for the parent, but IMO it would not be a big deal to the child. ---
**Author:** ![Sparky\_the\_Wonder\_Spirit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/848f3c/32.png) [@Sparky\_the\_Wonder\_Spirit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sparky_the_Wonder_Spirit)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2012, 5:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/miscarried-fetus-names-reuse/632071/42 "2012-08-23T05:21:01Z")
> [@DrDeth](#): > > Never name until you can see the head. > > Do have some ideas of course. Yeah, I wouldn’t name the kid until said kid’s arrival. ---
**Author:** ![Blackberry](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ecd19e/32.png) [@Blackberry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Blackberry)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2012, 5:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/miscarried-fetus-names-reuse/632071/43 "2012-08-23T05:36:07Z")
> [@DrDeth](#): > > Never name until you can see the head. > > Do have some ideas of course. This wouldn’t have worked for me. Just the fact that I was assigning what is essentially an arbitrary word to a human being seemed crazy to me when I had my daughter, like how am I qualified to do this? No name would have seemed to be “her” until she grew into it (or until I got used to it, really). That probably would have just taken longer if I hadn’t even settled on a name until after she was born. Not that I care how other people handle it. I just would never see any newborn and think any particular name was “them”. ---
**Author:** ![Cinnamon\_Imp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/58956e/32.png) [@Cinnamon\_Imp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cinnamon_Imp)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2012, 7:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/miscarried-fetus-names-reuse/632071/44 "2012-08-23T07:27:35Z")
I’d pretty much decided my daughter was going to be Rachel, till she was born, and I thought “Oh, you’re no Rachel!”! My recent ectopic pregnancy, I hadn’t had a chance to think of a name for the fetus, before it became obvious that something was wrong (I think I had a total of three days “huh, pregnant again?!” before it all started going downhill). My son who was born at 34 weeks and lived for 12 days, had his father’s middle name as his name, and I’d \*\*never \*\*re-use that. My ex is now having kids in a new relationship and I do occasionally worry he might not feel the same and might re-use it, it being a family name and all that ☹ ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2012, 11:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/miscarried-fetus-names-reuse/632071/45 "2012-08-23T11:48:34Z")
> [@DrDeth](#): > > Never name until you can see the head. I’d change “head” to “groin”. Friends told _everyone_ they were having a boy, based on ultrasound. The ultrasound was incorrect. They spent the kid’s first year of life explaining. ---
**Author:** ![Ludovic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ab992/32.png) [@Ludovic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ludovic)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2012, 12:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/miscarried-fetus-names-reuse/632071/46 "2012-08-23T12:00:19Z")
I have 4 specific names I’ve give to my daughters if I had any (although I’d let my wife pick from the four :)), but less picky about boys. I would recycle the girls names until I had one that survived, but might or might not recycle the boys names. (With my luck, I’ll marry Rachel Elizabeth Alice Caroline and won’t be able to use any of them except as middle names.) ---
**Author:** ![DrDeth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b487fb/32.png) [@DrDeth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DrDeth)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2012, 12:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/miscarried-fetus-names-reuse/632071/47 "2012-08-23T12:59:37Z")
> [@kayaker](#): > > I’d change “head” to “groin”. Friends told _everyone_ they were having a boy, based on ultrasound. The ultrasound was incorrect. They spent the kid’s first year of life explaining. OK, you got me. Unless the name is “Sue” of course. ---
**Author:** ![jennielucas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/b38774/32.png) [@jennielucas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jennielucas)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2015, 8:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/miscarried-fetus-names-reuse/632071/48 "2015-12-09T20:39:44Z")
Two early miscarriages, far along enough to identify gender. The first, Daniel James, James being the father’'s name. Second, a girl, different daddy. Rebecca Miriam. It was devastating enough when Rebecca’s daddy decided to marry my best friend instead of me; doubly awful when they named their firstborn K. Miriam. These decisions can have repercussions. ---
**Author:** ![SCAdian](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/scadian/32/3292_2.png) [@SCAdian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SCAdian)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2015, 11:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/miscarried-fetus-names-reuse/632071/49 "2015-12-09T23:45:23Z")
> [@BrotherCadfael](#): > > We never knew the sex of the baby ahead of time, so we didn’t have names picked out. We _did_ have names picked out - both boys’ and girls’ - for both pregnancies, but didn’t know until the babies arrived which ones we’d end up using. (Both girls, as it turned out.) ---
**Author:** ![dracoi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/90db22/32.png) [@dracoi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dracoi)\ **Post date:** [December 10, 2015, 12:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/miscarried-fetus-names-reuse/632071/50 "2015-12-10T00:17:43Z")
Never been a father myself, so it’s hard to say exactly how things would play out, but I don’t think I would want to name a baby until after the birth. Even if I picked a list of possible names, I really don’t think I would settle on the name until after I’d seen the baby and interacted a bit. Would I actually learn anything that would change my mind? Maybe not… but I’m not a cart before the horse kind of guy. Step 1: give birth. Step 2: fill out the birth certificate. Once a name was assigned, I would not re-use it, but the way I’ve described the process, there wouldn’t be a name until after the birth. Maybe this is partly colored by the birth of my youngest brother; I was about seven at the time. My parents were just sure he was a girl and had picked out the name and everything. Surprise! Time to pick a new name! ---
**Author:** ![dropzone](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dropzone/32/7515_2.png) [@dropzone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dropzone)\ **Post date:** [December 10, 2015, 12:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/miscarried-fetus-names-reuse/632071/51 "2015-12-10T00:33:02Z")
Male who would never name a potential baby before it took. My own original name was “Baby zone.” Against my better judgement my children had names before birth, including one named after a squirrel. Don’t let a barely older child name her new sister. ---
**Author:** ![Anamorphic](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/anamorphic/32/3057_2.png) [@Anamorphic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anamorphic)\ **Post date:** [December 10, 2015, 1:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/miscarried-fetus-names-reuse/632071/52 "2015-12-10T01:54:18Z")
> [@MostlyClueless](#): > > If you do, never, ever ever, EVER tell the kid. My parents did, with my younger brother. Miscarried, then had my brother a few years later. Used the same name they were going to use. He knows. It’s never seemed to bother him, and I’m not sure I see why it would. ---
**Author:** ![Bridget\_Burke](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7cd45c/32.png) [@Bridget\_Burke](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bridget_Burke)\ **Post date:** [December 10, 2015, 2:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/miscarried-fetus-names-reuse/632071/53 "2015-12-10T02:15:20Z")
> [@sugaree](#): > > This was really really common in the past, and not just for miscarriages. This is why the Empress Maria Theresa had two daughters named Maria Elisabeth and three named Maria Carolina. It was the convention then, but it’s different now, and I wouldn’t reuse a name because there’s a different set of baggage that comes from being named the name of a dead sibling, rather than being named after a deceased grandparent or uncle or something. Alexander & Eliza Hamilton had 8 children. The first one, Philip, was born in 1782 & died after a duel in 1801. Their last child was born in 1802; they named him Philip. (Then, in 1804, Alexander Hamilton was shot fatally at the same dueling ground as his son.) [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/miscarried-fetus-names-reuse/632071.md?page=2)